Heart of Stone, Eyes of Frost
by Blackpaladin37
Summary: Ria Lewis is a hardened surgeon with a messed up past. But her life is about to change... she wakes up in a cabin in the Hinterlands, with no idea how she got there. Ria joins the Inquisition and then the Inner Circle. The true transformation, however, begins when she meets Leliana- the cold spymaster who needs her healing hand more than anyone else
1. Chapter 1: Welcome to the Inquisition

**CHAPTER 1: Welcome to the Inquisition**

Ria opened her eyes to the sound of clanging metal. Her vision wavered before focussing on a dark ceiling. The smell in the room was musty and wooden. Not like the clean hospital room she'd been sleeping in for the night shift. Not the smell of alcohol gel or plastic.

She lay on her back for a few seconds before bolting up in the bed.

It was little more than a hard, wooden board with legs and a fur blanket thrown over it.

A thin beam of light filtered into the room, revealing fur lined boots on the floor. There was a heavy _chest_ in the corner by a wooden desk. The furniture and the cabin- from what she could tell- was old fashioned, like from a medieval era or something. Panic seized her as she looked around.

 _Where am I?_

This was definitely not the hospital. This wasn't even her home.

One thing was certain: she had to get out of here.

"It could be a dream… it _has_ to be a dream…" she muttered to herself.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, she slipped into the boots, heart thumping like mad.

"Ok, what the _fuck_ is wrong with my life…"

These days, she usually tried not to swear. But there had been a lot of shit in her life, and this situation was just bizarre. Where _was_ she?

A sudden thought occurred to her, relaxing her shoulders.

 _Of course! I'm so stupid! This must be some medieval TV show or movie and I'm on the set!_

The question was, what was she doing here? Even that didn't make sense. But it made more sense than the idea she had gone back in time to the middle ages.

She opened the door, and gaped when she saw what was making the commotion outside. Ria was facing a beautiful landscape with spreading maples, birches, oaks and other trees rising from a luscious, fertile ground. From cliffs flowed rushing waterfalls and giant boulders sat at their bases. The sky was a striking blue, and the sun shone like a burnished shield.

 _Holy…_

And nowhere… _nowhere_ did she see any film crew. No cameras, no shouting directors, no helicopter flying overhead. No one in a _T-shirt_. Everyone was either in armour or medieval looking clothes. She even spotted one woman in flowing white and red robes wearing something ridiculous on her head.

Those robes looked familiar.

 _No…_

Ria backed into the cabin and closed the door behind her, breathing heavily.

"Oh, nonononono…"

Those robes couldn't be…? _Chantry robes!_

Ria laughed out loud.

 _You can't be serious._

She was in Thedas, probably in the Hinterlands, by the look of it. Whatever the reason, she was here in a place that existed in a _video game_.

"This can't be real."

She tried to wrap her head around this revelation. Outside, men shouted as they sparred. Ria ran a hand down her face.

Whatever had happened, she knew she had to do something. Sighing, the surgeon dropped down in front of the chest.

 _Alright. If this is the Hinterlands, I need to be well prepared._

Luckily, it was free to open. As expected, the chest had some interesting things to loot: a long _dagger_ , a pouch of coins, leather gauntlets, steel greaves and a belt. Ria took a few minutes to stare at the contents.

On the endtable though, there was a large modern stainless steel case. Just the familiarity of the case made her sigh in relief. She opened it, surprised to find some emergency medicine, syringes, needles, bandages, surgical tools etc.

Ria stood staring at it. _How did_ this _get here?_

Whatever the reason, she wasn't complaining.

With shaking hands, she fumbled with the weapon and armour. It was then that she noticed her own clothes- she wasn't wearing her scrubs anymore. She was wearing a black tunic and forest green trousers. Medieval style.

The belt and gauntlets were easy enough, but she had some trouble securing the breastplate and greaves. After some cursing and fumbling, she did it.

Suddenly, there was a loud rapping on the door, making her jump sky high.

"Someone in there?" called a man's voice.

She hesitated for a bit before opening the door. A middle aged man in light armour stood there, frowning.

"What are you doing there, soldier?" He squinted at her face. "I haven't seen you before. Who are you?"

"I…" she said, sweating. "Ria. I'm… a new recruit."

"Alright, Ria. Why aren't you training with the others? There are lots of jobs to do- no time for mucking about."

"Yes, sir," she said instantly. Almost habitually, she thought bitterly. Years of working under consultants military style in the hospital had her used to such situations.

The soldier nodded and walked away. She breathed out a sigh, but the knot of tension in her remained.

What was she supposed to do? What jobs could she do here?

 _Survival… I've got to survive._

Ria went back into the cabin and tucked the case under an arm. Then she stepped out again.

Her eyes went to the woman in chantry robes. Could that be… Mother Giselle? The idea was so weird that another nervous laugh came out.

Okay, a plan. That was what she needed. She _always_ planned- before surgery, before consulting patients… before anything, really. If you fail to plan, you plan to fail- that was her motto.

Ria scanned the landscape: Mother Giselle was with her healers to the right, training soldiers in the distance, commonfolk trading and talking everywhere.

 _Right, if I'm going to stay alive here, I've got to be able to defend myself. Then,_ she thought with a glance at the wounded. _Maybe I could help the healers out._

As she made her way- awkwardly- to the soldiers, Ria's stomach churned nervously.

She was getting closer, and some of the soldiers were starting to notice her now. Most of them were men, a couple of them women. A tall man with dark eyebrows saw her approach. He walked towards her.

"Here to train?" he asked.

"Er… yes. Yes, I am."

"Are you a new recruit?"

"Yes…" she fidgeted with the case before answering. "This might sound… ridiculous, but I've never used a sword before."

The man blinked. "Never?"

"Never."

He considered her a moment. "Where are you from? You don't sound entirely Ferelden."

At least she was ready for this. "I came to Ferelden when I was young."

"I see…" he said, though he didn't comment on the fact she didn't answer his question. Thank God.

"Alright, then," he continued. "The Inquisition always welcomes fresh faces. Go talk to Bevan and he will teach you the basics."

"Thank you."

"Oh, and soldier? What was your name?"

"Ria."

"Welcome to the Inquisition."

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It turned out she didn't have to worry so much about making a fool of herself. The big bear of a guy- Bevan- was a good teacher. They went painfully slow at first, and she felt really self conscious. But she quickly realized everyone else was too busy to take notice. The sword eventually felt more comfortable in her hand, and Bevan even complimented her moves.

"You're a natural, girl!" he boomed, grinning. "You look slim as an elf. But you're stronger than I thought."

 _It must be all the_ _retractions I do for hours in theatre._

"Good flow, good technique. A little awkward, but you're a beginner. I certainly don't recommend you go out with the other scouts any time soon."

"Yeah, definitely."

"Alright, one more time!" he said, lunging at her.

They kept at it all day, and Bevan pushed her harder and harder. By the end of it all, she was seriously exhausted and bruised from being hit with the flat of the blade.

She didn't even have the chance to think about everything that had happened- sleep took her when she hit the bedroll.

For the next week, training continued with Bevan and he took the time to explain what was happening in the Hinterlands. The Templars and the mages were warring against each other, and the soldiers were trying to protect the villagers and serve the inquisition. The refugees needed food, clothing, blankets etc and they were quickly running short of supplies. There was also news that the Herald himself would be coming soon.

At this, Ria's ears pricked up. The Herald? Despite the weirdness of everything, Ria was still a fan of DAI. After meeting Corporal Vale, she had to admit she wanted to see the others in real life. If this was even real…

Part of her had expected to wake up in the bed at hospital. After all, it had been a stressful shift. It could have been a long dream. But no, she was still in Thedas. Dreams were never this long.

And to be honest, she needed a break from surgery and the hospital. Maybe this wasn't so bad… if she didn't die. Besides, she was getting the hang of fighting. She still hadn't gotten round to talking to Mother Giselle. The training was draining her stamina and she slept like a rock at the end of the day.

Today, though, Bevan was off to investigate some Mage/Templar activity on the road so she was free to do whatever she wanted.

In the distance, she saw the dusky face of the chantry Mother and approached her. The woman was tending an injured man, who shuddered as she loosened the bandages. She shook her head in sympathy.

"He needs debridement and a good wash out," she heard herself blurt out.

Mother Giselle turned around, surprised.

"And you are?" she asked in her thick Orlesian accent, expression uncertain.

Ria sighed inwardly. People tended to look at her that way. She had learned long ago that her default face could be intimidating.

"Oh… right. I'm Ria, a new recruit. But I do have experience in surgery."

"You do?" the Mother said, eyebrows climbing. "Well, that is a pleasant surprise. But tell me, what did you mean by debridement?"

"Just... trimming the edges, eliminating non- viable tissue so that the wound heals properly when you seal it."

The Mother blinked, just like Corporal Vale had. "I have never heard of such a thing."

"Well… what do you people do here?"

"We clean the wound with water and use poultices. Our healers make excellent relieving salves for the pain."

The patient moaned, letting out shallow breaths.

"This man, unfortunately, is not healing very well."

Ria knelt to examine.

 _Long gash, probably cuts down to the deep fascia, erythematous, oozing… swollen?_

She poked around the wound, feeling a non fluctuant mass just lateral to it. Ria felt the man's forehead and noticed an ulcer in his foot and some dry, red skin on his arms.

 _Feverish, the abscess is probably deep, long standing dermatitis could have invited the infection. Ulcer on his foot..._

"Excuse me," she said to the groaning man, noticing him clutching his abdomen. "What's wrong with your belly?"

"Urgh….mkdf."

"…"

"Hurts sometimes… here and back."

"When did that start?"

"Been for years… but last night… ale…"

Hmm. "Was this a cup or bottle?"

"Few bottles... argh…."

Ria looked at Mother Giselle. "Do you know if he's an alcoholic?"

She stared at Ria.

"I mean... does he drink lots of ale? Any other symptoms?"

"Not that I am aware of."

 _No jaundice, no other symptoms. Can probably manage with the usual protocol._

"Well, I think he has poor blood sugar control," Ria explained.

"How do you know?"

"Wound hasn't been healing properly, easy infections, ulcer in his foot, epigastric pain, drinks lots of ale- probably pancreatitis with diabetes. Dermatitis could have also let in the infection. He needs analgesia and the abscess needs to be drained. Also, no offence meant, but that stitch looks very unclean. I have some sterile suture so I can redo it for you."

She opened her case, hands itching to do something. This was probably the easiest presentation she had come across in a long time.

After washing her hands thoroughly, she removed the stitches, cleaned it with chlorhexidine and debrided it after injecting some local. She drained the pus, washed the cavity with saline and packed it with gauze.

 _Man, the case is handy_ , she thought as she stood up. Mother Giselle was staring at her.

"All done. When he wakes up he'll need controlled mor- I mean, medicine to help with the pain. Lots of fluid, no eating. We need to check the abscess again later."

"Well… I must say, I have not seen such methods. You were a surgeon, did you say?"

"Yes."

"Then perhaps… you should join us, my dear."


	2. Chapter 2: The Inner Circle

**CHAPTER 2: The Inner Circle**

Ria stared as Mother Giselle walked with the Herald, their words too far away to hear.

 _Holy Andraste…_

It was _her_ Herald. The character _she_ had made. Short, tousled brown hair, blue eyes and that straight nose. She had spent a whole hour creating him. He even wore the same bloodstone armour.

This was... incredible.

And there was Cassandra, Solas and Varric.

The Mother introduced her to them, and Ria could only gape as she shook hands with the heroes of the Inquisition.

Varric grinned. "A surgeon, eh? We need more of those in the Inquisition. Nice to meet you."

"... Nice to meet you too," said Ria in a daze.

"Say… you should join us in Haven sometime. We've got some good ale at the tavern. I'm always up for a good drinking partner."

Cassandra rolled her eyes but shook hands with her. "Please ignore Varric, I'm embarrassed to be seen with him."

"Pleased to meet you too, Seeker."

"And I am Solas," said the ghostly white elf. It always fascinated her how pale and good his complexion was.

After exchanging a few more words, they had to leave immediately. It didn't surprise her- the Herald was a busy man. She remembered how many blasted hours she had to spend in the Hinterlands and realized… it was better to stay at the Crossroads.

For the next few days, she laboured with Mother Giselle, tending to the wounded. Corporal Vale had been very surprised at her being a surgeon but agreed to let Mother Giselle take her as an assistant. It mostly involved her giving pain killers and fluids, cleaning and dressing wounds, reducing fractures and guessing diagnoses.

Working in Thedas made her appreciate modern technology- she had to improvise and guess a lot for cases where she usually used lab tests and scans.

Mother Giselle questioned her about the equipment, the drugs and the different procedures. She tried not to give away too much, in case she accidentally let slip her secret.

Ria imagined trying to explain it: _by the way, I'm actually from another world. A place where Thedas only exists in a video game…_

Now was probably not the time.

On the day Trevelyan returned to the Crossroads, she was completely knackered. They had spent the whole day receiving wounded refugees. Some even claimed to have seen a dragon. Others were simply caught in the crossfire between the mages and Templars.

From their last quest, Varric and Cassandra were injured with dislocations and open wounds. These were easily fixed, and the dwarf thanked her by playing Wicked Grace with her. Cassandra refused to play so it was just Ria, Varric and some other soldiers. Over a few days of trading stories and doing ridiculous dares, the two of them bonded well. With his witty jokes and the light banter, it wasn't hard to relax around him.

"You play alright for a first timer, kid," he said, seeing her hand.

Ria laid down four songs and a serpent. She shrugged, not wanting to reveal too much about her past life. "I've played some card games before."

"Well it's a good thing I found you then," said the dwarf, grinning. "It's a favourite past time of mine."

"That, and cleaning your crossbow," said Ria.

"How did you know?" asked Varric, laughing.

"I've seen you do it four times a day. You clearly love it to bits."

"Well, Bianca and I… we're like this," he said, twisting his index and middle finger together.

"No kidding. Where did you get it?"

"I won it off a paragon by the name of Branka in a game of Wicked Grace."

"Wait, the paragon who disappeared into the Deep Roads?"

"That's the one. You heard about her?"

"Yeah... so why the name Bianca?" she asked, changing the subject so he wouldn't ask about how she knew.

"Oh, I'd rather not say," replied Varric, looking shifty eyed.

"I'm guessing this is the name of someone you know," Ria said with a smirk.

He nudged her ribs. "Too sharp for your own good. Maybe sometime in the future, I'll tell you about her."

"Alright," said Ria, snorting.

But aside from that one secret, Varric had no problem with telling her about life in Kirkwall and quests with the Inquisition. Hearing about the darkspawn, the Templars and mages… it all felt too unreal. The mundane atmosphere of the hospital was such a striking contrast to this fantastical world. However, her initial excitement at being in Thedas died down, replaced by a familiar weariness. It seemed that wherever she went, her work followed her.

So she tried to relax in the chair she was sitting in, closing her eyes.

There was a loud groan as Varric lowered his heavy ass onto the chair next to her.

"Ah…" he sighed contentedly. "Nothing like a good bottle of ale and a chair under the stars." The dwarf popped the cork of a bottle and took a swig.

"Hello, Varric," said Ria.

"Hello to you, too. How was today?"

"Busy, I suppose. A lot of injuries, a lot of general diseases. Not really the usual cases I got back at home."

Varric took another chug. "What kind of things did _you_ do?"

"Mostly gut and endocrine surgeries."

"I see, whatever that means… so you're having a hard time."

Ria nodded, rubbing her sleepy eyes. "We just don't have the equipment around here to be sure of anything."

 _An ECG, X ray, ultrasound… I never imagined I would miss these._

"This happens in war, kid. Don't worry about saving every life."

Ria half laughed. "If I did that, I would have quit long ago."

"Then don't let things get you down. We need people like you here. Besides, I've wanted some good company for a while."

"What's wrong with the Inner Circle?"

"Oh, they're good people. But the Herald is a busy guy- a lot riding on his shoulders. Solas is a dependable elf, but quiet. _Too_ quiet. And Cassandra… well, let's just say we aren't best friends. But she's fun to tease… and we get along."

Ria snorted. "I'm pretty quiet."

"That's true, but once you're prompted, you can talk just fine. And I can tell you've seen things, been places. You're there in the background, but people can rely on you to watch their back."

The surgeon stared at him. "Thanks."

"Don't mention it. And if you ever get tired of this place, come to Haven and prove yourself to the Circle. We could use a surgeon on our missions. And you're not too bad with that sword of yours."

Ria eyed him for a moment suspiciously, trying to decide whether he was being serious or not.

"That would be… an honour."

Varric winked and held out a hand. Ria shook it. "Alright, I won't keep you from sleep any longer. It's been good meeting you- haven't enjoyed a game of cards in a long time. I'm going to Haven tomorrow but if you ever come, just give me a shout."

The surgeon nodded, a small smile on her face.

Ria laid out her bedroll as he walked away. Varric was the nicest guy she'd come across in a long time. They only met a few weeks ago, but she felt like they'd been friends for years. And she realized she was lowering the barrier that she always put up.

Ria always kept people at an arm's length- tired of playing the game, tired of guessing what they really wanted, tired of being used. But this guy had none of that. No pretence.

As she lowered herself into the bedroll, she felt a flicker of hope in her chest. Maybe… just maybe.

But before she could close her eyes, there was a rustle of robes as Mother Giselle seated herself in the chair.

"You do not need to get up, my dear. I won't keep you long," she said, as Ria bolted up.

"Alright…"

"You did very well today, Ria. I would tell you to enjoy your rest but I needed to tell you I will be leaving soon."

She tried to remember what happened in the game. "… you're going to Haven too?"

The woman raised an eyebrow. "Yes. How did you know?"

"I guessed?... That's where the Inquisition is," she said quickly.

Mother Giselle nodded, looking up at the night sky.

"I must pass on some important information. The Herald has settled most of the issues here and the healers can handle this on their own."

"I see."

"Would you like to come with me? I must say, the healers are very good at their job, but you are skilled and diligent. You have valuable knowledge that will benefit the Inquisition. I need a trustworthy assistant by my side," the Mother said, smiling.

Ria let out a breath, relieved. To be honest, even though she wasn't exactly into the whole Maker thing, she had come to rely on this woman over the past few weeks. The Mother had that effect on people- her calm demeanour made things much easier to handle. Moreover, being occupied by work helped Ria feel better. She was a person who needed to _act_. As for going home… a solution hadn't been found, but she had a feeling that sticking close to the Mother was the safest option.

Staying in the Hinterlands was _not_ going to get her anywhere. For the first week, she'd tried endless times to return home using the cabin she first woke up in. It never worked.

Whatever the reason for her being here, she clearly had to move _forward_.

So she gave the obvious answer: "Definitely, Mother Giselle."

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When she stepped through the doors of Haven, a shiver ran through her as she saw the stony steps, the familiar houses, tents and the distant outline of the chantry.

Ria followed Mother Giselle as she ascended the steps. People bowed respectfully as the Mother walked, murmuring greetings as she passed by.

At the top, they met Varric, who clapped Ria on the back.

"Well, if it isn't the young surgeon! Good to see you here. It gets boring in the Hinterlands, doesn't it?"

The Mother stopped to smile at the dwarf. "We meet again."

"Hello, Mother Giselle. How was the journey?"

"Very good, thank you."

"Great, well, I won't keep you waiting. I know you have important business here," he said, grinning. Mother Giselle nodded and Ria waved at the dwarf. The guy could always lighten up the mood, even after hours of spraying darkspawn gore everywhere. Though… she did want to tell him to button up that shirt. His hairy chest could poke someone's eye out.

Ria shivered again in her thick jacket, drawing the gauntlets up a bit further to seal off the cold. It didn't help that the greaves, gauntlets and breastplate were made out of cold steel, rubbing against her skin through fabric.

She was impatient to step into the warmth of the chantry.

Ria shrugged her right shoulder to get the pack on her back in a more comfortable position. She was adjusting the strap when she saw a flash of red. Her eyes met ice blue.

The hooded woman looked up from a chart on a desk. Ria felt like the breath was knocked out from her as she stared. For some reason, she couldn't tear her eyes away. It was like a magnetic force was linking their gazes. Leliana didn't look away either.

It was only when she nearly banged her head on the chantry door that she looked forward.

Mother Giselle tutted. "Careful, Ria."

When she glanced back, there was a ghost of a smile on the spymaster's lips. Ria felt her cheeks burning in embarrassment.

"Now come in, my dear."

"Er… yes."

The warmth of the building seeped into her limbs and clothes, making Ria sigh in relief. Mother Giselle chuckled. "I must agree with you on the weather of Haven. After the long journey, you have earned your rest," she said, motioning at a sister of the chantry. "Sister Elaine, would you be so kind as to take Ria to a room?"

"Yes, Mother Giselle," said the sister, bowing.

The girl was about to approach Ria when a voice cut the air.

"And who is _this_?"

A sneering man in chantry robes marched to them, narrowing his eyes at Ria's uniform.

"Another upstart joining the heretics?"

Ria crossed her arms, raising an eyebrow at the High Chancellor. She'd met plenty of rude, self-righteous bulls like him before.

"And why would you care about an _upstart_ joining the Inquisition?"

Roderick frowned at this retaliation, clearly not expecting it.

"Because it is exactly people like _you_ that shame the name of the Maker and the chantry!"

"Alright. First of all, you don't even know me. Secondly, I think _you've_ embarrassed the chantry enough already."

The Chancellor's face flushed angrily. "Now who are you to-?"

Mother Giselle stepped in, holding up a hand. "Please, both of you. Chancellor, this is my assistant, surgeon Ria. She has been helping me heal the wounded in the Hinterlands."

" _Surgeon_?" he asked incredulously, pointing at Ria's armour. "Then _why_ can I see her wearing the uniform of a soldier?"

Ria opened her mouth but Mother Giselle silenced her with a look. "She was a soldier until I found out about her skills. Many have recovered well because of her."

Smoke issued through his nose as he considered this. He lifted his chin.

"Then you serve the chantry?"

Mother Giselle answered for her. "She is a servant of the Maker."

 _When did I agree to that?_

Roderick still glared at her, not pleased about her previous comment. "Then see to it that she fulfills her duties," he said, as if he were thousands of feet above her.

The Chancellor nodded at the revered Mother and walked out of the building. Ria glared at his back.

"Peace," said the Mother, placing an arm on her shoulder. "Do not take the words to heart. The Chancellor has been very upset as of late. He has been arguing with the leaders of the Inquisition ever since it was born."

Ria frowned, shaking her head. "Well, if he keeps at it, he's going to feel someone's fist in his gut."

The dark skinned woman sighed. "It is not an easy decision to accept, especially for the chantry people. It has been so long since the miracles of Andraste that even I have my doubts about the Herald."

Ria considered telling her the truth about what really happened at the conclave, but decided against it. Instead, she nodded. "I understand. Besides, I'm not here for trouble. Stepping out of his way won't be too difficult."

"That's the spirit, my dear. Now go, bathe yourself and enjoy your rest."

"Just one more thing."

The revered Mother looked at her in question.

"I'm... not a servant of the Maker," said Ria.

"I know," said the other woman sadly. "But it was the only way I could settle the matter. The Inquisition is not welcome to many chantries. Surgeons, perhaps, but not soldiers. It is my wish that you are not hounded by the Chancellor while you are here."

"Then thank you."

"You are very welcome, Ria."

The Sister escorted Ria to a chamber and showed her where to bathe. It wasn't a modern day bathroom, but Ria had to admit it was better than some of the public toilets she had seen.

She thanked the Sister and stared at the tub. It took a moment for her to realize she had to actually fill it with water. There were no taps, no pipes.

After bathing, she changed into a fresh tunic, trousers and collapsed onto her bed. She lay there for an hour or two, drifting in and out of sleep.

The excitement was probably too much.

Ria gave up on sleeping and rolled out of bed to put on her jacket and breastplate. She also strapped on her sword. Right now, she felt like exploring the place.

Before stepping out into the cold, she briefly reconsidered her decision before pushing the doors open. Her eyes immediately sought the cool, mysterious spymaster, but her tent was empty.

A little disappointed, Ria fingered her sword absent mindedly.

Ria would be lying if she denied that Leliana was the one character she had been dying to see. Back in Dragon Age Origins, her Warden had romanced the bard. But she hadn't expected to be affected so much by that one _look_.

 _Alright… get your head out of the clouds._

She shook her head and walked over to Varric again. The dwarf saw her and gave a toothy grin.

"Ah, Ria!"

"Hello Varric." She eyed the hairy chest with a twist to her lips. "I have a question."

"Go for it."

"How do you stay out in this weather with _that_ open like that?" she asked, smirking.

"Come on, it's the latest trend," he said, spreading his arms out wide.

"You must be the real ladykiller, then."

Varric laughed. "Only for Bianca."

Ria snorted. "Yes… I'm sure."

"But, unless I'm wrong, I don't think you're here to talk about my hairy chest. What can I do for you?"

Ria gestured around her. "I guess I'm just here to check the place out, you know? Mind giving me a tour?"

"Oh, if that's what you needed, you came to the right guy. Come on, surgeon."

The dwarf said, walking the path to his left. "First stop is _always_ the tavern."

"Uh…" said Ria.

"Something wrong?"

"Well, I don't drink. Much."

"Andraste's ass! Are you serious, girl?"

"I… it's a long story."

The dwarf stared at her.

"Never mind, lead on."

Varric did lead her to the tavern, where she had a bit of the ale. He was disappointed but laughed.

"Ah, you'll get used to it. When we have a party after Corypheus is dead, I'll be expecting you to drink a full tankard."

Next, he took her to see some trebuchets and then down to get a better sword. The merchant was an irritating man- he wouldn't accept haggling but she paid for it anyway.

"Hope it was worth it," she sighed, testing out the longsword. It was a bit heavy, but weeks of training in the Hinterlands had built her some muscle.

"It's not too bad. You wanna go see the blacksmith?"

"Sounds good."

It was there beside the stables and the burly man eyed her with arms folded.

"You don't look like you're from around here," was his first comment.

"No. I'm not."

He nodded. "Your accent is… strange. Not entirely Ferelden."

"… So I've heard."

"Alright, can we fix her up in something better?" interrupted the dwarf, pulling out a pouch of coins.

"Wait, what? I don't have the money for this, Varric."

He winked at her. "I've got this."

"I'm not going to fight any time soon."

Varric turned to her then, his eyes serious. "Kid, one thing you need to know is that Haven won't always be safe. That scout mail you've got there won't do you any good. You might as well not be wearing it."

Ria looked down at the breastplate and greaves. He had a point.

"… thanks."

Varric chuckled while the blacksmith carried out the armour.

The dwarf was already handing him the coins. Ria held the armour as they walked away to the sparring grounds.

Ria followed him in silence, biting the inside of her cheek. She toyed with the words inside her head before she said them. "Thanks a lot, Varric."

It had been so long since she had someone to thank that it felt painfully awkward.

"Don't mention it, kiddo."

"… I'm not that young you know."

"How old are you?"

"Twenty six."

"Twenty six?! Andraste's tits, you look twenty or less!"

"Thanks?"

Varric laughed, shaking his head. "And I thought Leliana looked young for her age."

The name lanced a bolt through her. She swallowed. "How old is she?" trying to ask as casually as possible.

"About thirty, I think."

"Seriously?"

"I know, she doesn't look it, does she?"

Ria could only nod as they approached Cassandra. The Seeker looked flustered about something, waving her arms about to explain. The surgeon smirked and nudged Varric, who grinned.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" he asked.

"When did you notice the chemistry?"

"Let's just say… when they started bickering."

Ria laughed.

"Hail, seeker! Herald!" called out Varric.

The Herald jumped and turned around. Irritation twisted Cassandra's features. She nodded at Ria.

"Well, if it isn't the surgeon. Mother Giselle's assistant, is it not?"

"It is."

"Have you come to train? I saw your practice in the Hinterlands," said Cassandra, crossing her arms and looking at her with a critical eye. "Not bad. With more training, you will be able to defend yourself well."

"A surgeon _and_ warrior?" asked the Herald, raising an eyebrow.

Ria almost laughed out loud. _That really isn't the most surprising thing here, believe me._

"Just a soldier. Until I joined Mother Giselle, that is."

"Then we must _make_ you into a warrior, if you are to be her guard," said Cassandra.

"Her guard?" Ria wasn't really sure about this.

The Seeker sheathed her sword, the sharp scrape of metal making her jump. "This isn't a quiet hospital, Surgeon. Everyone must be able to defend themselves. And the chantry will expect you to live up to the standards."

Ria frowned. "I don't think I could reach that level of competency."

"How about someone trains her? Cullen would do an excellent job," suggested Varric.

"Cullen?" said Maxwell Trevelyan, scratching his head. "I don't know if he'll help, his plate is a little full at the moment. Varric must like you a lot to suggest this."

"I'll give it a try," said the dwarf.

He walked to the Commander and brought him over. "Cullen has just agreed."

"Albeit reluctantly… wouldn't she be better off honing her skills as a surgeon?" grumbled the former Templar.

"She has potential," said Cassandra. "And good surgeons are rare these days. We need her to defend herself."

"And guard Mother Giselle, of course," added Varric helpfully.

Cullen sighed. "Alright, then." He turned to Ria with a severe expression, folding his arms. "But you're going to have to push yourself. I've got a lot of _other_ soldiers to take care of."

Ria mirrored him, folding her arms. "Whatever you say, Commander."


	3. Chapter 3: Nothing to Lose

**CHAPTER 3: Nothing to Lose**

Ria grunted as Cullen whacked her with the flat of his blade.

"Again!"

Hissing at the bruise, she steeled herself as he lunged forward. No matter what position she took, she could never get past his defences. Over the past few days the Commander drilled her mercilessly, criticizing every move, every mistake. It was nothing new, since she got plenty of this at work. But it was never with the smarting smacks she received with these sessions. And with his unchanging expression and frustrated instructions, Ria didn't really know if she was making good progress or not. That warrior's face never gave anything away.

"Hold that shield up! If you were in the middle of a battle, you'd be dead already!"

Maybe it was the physical pain, or the irritation building up. She growled and swung the sword viciously, driving him back. A slash, a parry, and then a downward cut. Her weapon glanced off his shield but he staggered at the weight. Was that a smile she could see? But it was gone in a flash.

Catching the tip of his sword on her handguard, she twisted and wrenched it out of his grasp. Then the pommel of her sword banged on his breastplate harmlessly.

"Damn, I forgot about your armour."

Cullen shook his head. "Never mind about _that_. Nice work with disarming. Just don't forget to watch for unexpected movement," he said, rubbing his chin. "And concentrate on your footwork too."

"I need to work on it."

He nodded and took in her sweaty, beaten up appearance.

"Alright, we'll stop here for today. Get yourself bathed and we shall meet tomorrow morning."

Ria nodded, unable to believe he just expressed approval. She jammed her helmet on and bent down to get her pack. She straightened up and felt her whole body stiffen as _she_ walked towards them. Since arriving in Haven, Ria hadn't seen Leliana anywhere. Neither in the chantry or her tent. The spymaster had been off on a mission of her own for the Inquisition. But now… here she was with her copper hair flying in the wind, blue eyes analysing… calculating.

Ria suddenly felt dirty and unattractive in her gear but she bowed anyway.

"Sister Nightingale," she murmured.

The woman inclined her head with a gaze that could pierce stone.

"Surgeon Ria. A pleasure," she said politely, her Orlesian accent smoothing out the words like liquid.

She wasn't surprised that Leliana knew her name. Her agents were everywhere. But she jumped all the same.

Was that a smile tugging at the corner of her lip?

The memory of her nearly crashing into the chantry doors came back. She groaned inwardly.

But the spymaster had already turned her attention to Cullen.

"Back so late, Leliana. Was there some trouble?"

The woman's lips turned down in distaste. "The man I tracked down disappeared."

"Was this the man who claimed to be related to the Herald?"

She nodded, sighing. "It was a waste of time. I will be staying here a while before sending my agents. But that is not why I'm here."

"The Herald has returned from Val Royeaux. They encountered Templars… led by Lord Seeker Lucius."

"What?"

"And the Herald, Cassandra, Varric and Solas were attacked by Orlesian soldiers."

"Are they alright?" asked Ria suddenly, already thinking about the medicine she would need.

Leliana turned back to her. "Yes, they are well. Cuts and bruises- nothing serious, of course."

"And?" said Cullen impatiently.

"First enchanter Fiona extended a hand of help to the Inquisition."

"Interesting… you're not really considering that?"

"It's a trap," said Ria, remembering what happened in the game.

Both Cullen and Leliana stared at her.

"I mean… it's possible. An alliance with the Templars is the better route… it's up to you, I suppose. But trust me, it will be much less painful," she said, deliberately looking at Leliana. It might have come out as a glare.

 _Oh, whatever…_

The spymaster gave her a questioning look, as if trying to figure her out.

"At any rate, we should discuss the next step in the war room," said Cullen.

Leliana nodded slowly, still looking at Ria.

Ria strapped on her sword and nodded to the two before making her escape.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Leliana stared at a corner in the wall, eyes narrowed as everyone argued. Her thoughts kept returning to the surgeon. She had an air of mystery about her, a certain knowledge behind pensive eyes. What had she meant? How would she know that the Templars would be the better option? Could she foresee the future?

Only the Maker knew such things.

Whatever the case may be, the others were certainly heading in favour of the Templars.

"The Templars _must_ help us close the breach. The Order was _founded_ to fight magic!" growled Cullen, which snapped her out of her reverie.

"Yes, and we must convince the Lord Seeker to bring the Templars out of exile," she added.

"We've received word from a knight recruit. They gather at Therinfal Redoubt."

The Seeker frowned at this. "It has been vacant for decades. Why go there?"

Josephine sighed, tapping her quill on the parchment she carried. "We must approach the Lord Seeker to get _anywhere_. We can ask him then."

"If we present the plan to seal the breach," the Inquisitor spoke up. "The Templars may ally with us."

Leliana almost showed her exasperation at his naiveté. " _First_ we must prove ourselves a more attractive prospect."

Josie pursed her lips in thought before replying. "If it is status the Lord Seeker seeks, the Inquisition will approach him after allying with the noblest houses in Orlais."

Leliana nodded in approval. Just like her friend to be the problem solver. Maxwell Trevelyan was a good man, but he was still new to strategizing and reasoning.

"The nobles will come to Therinfal and demand the Templars help close the breach."

Cullen raised an eybrow. "You believe that will work?"

Cassandra's hawk like features frowned even more. "Even the Lord Seeker would find it difficult to ignore so many nobles on his doorstep."

"Yes, especially when led by the Herald of Andraste."

"Is it my good looks you need, or my winning smile?" asked the Herald, grinning.

Leliana resisted the urge to roll her eyes. "Rumours that you were saved by Andraste in the Fade have reached the ears of the Templars."

"Well," said Trevelyan, shrugging. "Perhaps that is the reason Andraste saved me. To lead her Templars against the breach."

"And we must stop this mania that has seized Lord Seeker Lucius," said Cassandra vehemently.

"With respect, I say we _hang_ what the Lord Seeker says. Especially after Val Royeaux," said Cullen.

"Then we need the help of the Templars, with or without his approval," finished Leliana.

And that was that.

Everyone walked out of the room with determined expressions while Josephine wrote notes. Leliana stayed behind as the rest filed out. Her friend scratched on the parchment for another minute before looking up.

"Leliana, I see something is bothering you."

She smiled. "Is it that obvious?"

"Well, I am your closest friend. It would be a pity if I had not noticed. Now tell me, what are you thinking about?"

Leliana crossed her arms. "Have you met Mother Giselle's new assistant?"

"Not personally, no. But from afar, yes."

"From afar?" said the spymaster, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh, you know me. I have an eye for aesthetic beauty. She _is_ nice to look at."

"…"

Leliana _had_ noticed, but the talk was drifting off topic.

"But there is something different about her… I can't explain it but she seems to know things we do not."

Josephine looked at her thoughtfully. "From what I have heard, she is a surgeon with remarkable skills. Skills that our healers have never seen before. She was discovered by Mother Giselle in the Hinterlands, one of the soldiers recruited there. No one knows where she is from, only that she came to Ferelden at a young age."

The spymaster nodded. "I have heard the same report. My agents also say Mother Giselle has been relaying her advices to Cassandra. She is a new recruit… not to mention a surgeon. Her background has nothing to suggest any battle experience. Yet her recommendations go heeded."

Her friend nodded, angling her head. "Yes, you are right. That is quite a mystery. Although… I have heard some of the suggestions myself and I believe they are sound advice."

"There is one other thing: early this morning, Cullen and I were discussing the alliance and she confidently suggested we ally with the Templars. No hesitation, no doubt."

Josephine actually chuckled. "Leliana, are you sure you are not just fascinated by this young woman? She is an intelligent person, I am sure she came to a logical conclusion."

Leliana glared at her. "She said it _was_ a trap to ally with the mages. Not that it _could._ And…"

She bit her lower lip as she considered telling her the rest, hoping Josephine wouldn't laugh.

"… she specifically looked at me when she said it would be a less painful option. Like she _knew_ something. Josie- Maker's breath, I can't explain it!" she snapped as she saw Josephine giggling.

The advisor regained her composure before replying. "Alright, Leliana. I'm sorry for laughing. I understand where you are coming from, but we simply do not know enough of her to form an opinion. But if what you say is right, then she will prove a valuable ally, no?"

"Yes, I suppose," she said, still irritated.

Her friend patted her on the shoulder. She suddenly looked at her in sympathy. "I have to admit… she does look remarkably like your description of…"

Her voice trailed off.

Leliana swallowed past the lump in her throat. She knew exactly who Josephine was talking about.

The one who had died and left her to mourn, living each passing day like the undead. After _her_ , she had never taken another lover.

When the new visitor had walked into Haven, armoured with a sword strapped to her belt, Leliana had been instantly drawn to the woman. The dark hair, the pale skin, the serious eyes, the boldness of her steps… it was like seeing _her_ again.

But she was not- she was Ria, a surgeon and Mother Giselle's guard.

She needed to remember that. There were many jobs to do; agents to send out, missions to complete, alliances to be made, rumours to be quelled and rumours to be fuelled. That was her duty. And she would not let one woman distract her from this.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

As she walked to the chantry after treating the wounded, Ria ran a hand through her sweaty hair. It had been a long day, and Mother Giselle had left her with the healers because of other duties. She grabbed a wineskin of water and gulped it down, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. The Mother turned from instructing one of the sisters. She smiled kindly.

"Ah, Ria. You are finished with the work?"

Always ready for a smile. She liked that about the Mother. Back at home, competition raged like a bushfire. Stress made people stone faced and tight lipped. And Ria remembered the whirlwind rounds she had to do in the mornings. They were morning _marches_ , more like. And this woman didn't seem to care about Ria's onyx gaze and stiff mouth.

She tried for a smile, hoping it would look like one.

"Yes. All of them are stable, no worrying signs. Do you need a hand with anything?"

The sister excused herself and the Divine turned back to Ria. "No, my dear. But would you be so kind as to walk with me?"

Ria blinked. "… of course, Mother Giselle."

The woman led her around the perimeter of the courtyard. Her eyes were far away, wistful.

"They look very busy, do they not?" she asked, gesturing at the villagers and soldiers.

Ria nodded slowly, wondering where this conversation was going. "…they do."

"These people… they work in the hope, the _dream_ of freedom. They work for the future of Thedas." The Mother took more steps, calmly sidestepping a man with a pile of logs. "Everyone knows that each step counts- every decision, every effort they make. And yet… they look hopeful, passionate."

Ria followed her as they passed the tavern. A pair of men exited, laughing. They stopped, and bowed to the Mother before walking away. Nearby, a father lifted his child on his shoulders as he pointed to the soldiers.

She continued speaking: "It is not always the success that matters. Rather, the journey to it."

Now they were near the merchant. His wares were laid out on the table.

The Mother turned to face her. "Surgeon Ria, you are skilful at what you do. You work with determination and diligence. And yet… I cannot help but feel my heart saddened by the emptiness in you. You see the tools before you like those of that merchant. And you also see the purpose for which you must use them. But there is no fire in you. I see hands that are deft, masterly. But I also see hands that are automatic, mechanical."

Ria's lips stretched thin in automatic defence. There was much to be said, much to be unburied. She felt her jaw work painfully, her hands closed into fists. "Revered Mother… you are right in saying that. I do my best, I get the job done. That's the end of it. That is… was the nature of my profession. But you can't do anything for me."

The Mother regarded her with sad eyes, accentuating the age lines. "I do not know what is in your past, or what your home was like. And I will not press you. When we first met, I felt a darkness in you that concerned me. But your eyes betray a hurt, a thorn in your side that I pray the Maker will extricate."

Ria's gaze was steely as she looked at the ground. She remained silent.

"It may not seem like it now, but there is always a purpose for every trial."

A harsh laugh escaped her. "Purpose?"

The Mother nodded, looking into the distance. Something in her expression made guilt twist in her gut. It wasn't this woman's fault Ria's past was what it was.

"Take gold for example. You begin with a simple bar, too soft for use in a jeweller's hands. It is refined through fire- the more intense the heat, the better the result. Only in the furnace of affliction will our faith be tested."

The surgeon let out a breath. "I don't know anything about purpose. I don't know why I'm here," she said in a low voice. "I… wasn't completely truthful when we met. I became a recruit because I didn't have a choice."

"What do you mean?" The Mother looked curious.

"The truth is, I was… transported to the Hinterlands."

At this, the woman's eyes widened. Then she gestured at the Chantry. "Come, we must talk of this there."

When they got there, the Mother made sure none of the sisters were around.

"Now, tell me how that came to be."

Ria shrugged. "I was sleeping at the hospital I was working at. And then… I woke up in a cabin at the Crossroads. I have no idea how I got there."

" _Truly_?" the woman said. She shook her head. "I… did not expect such a story." For a time, she mulled over the words.

The surgeon scuffed her boot on the ground. "I don't really believe in the Maker. Or maybe _trust_ is the better word. I used to believe in a higher power. But I've been through some things that I…" She bit her tongue as the memories came back. Ria sucked in a deep breath as her throat constricted.

The Mother nodded in encouragement. "I understand, child."

" _Do_ you?" Ria spat the harsh words, instantly regretting them. She covered her eyes with a hand. "I'm sorry."

"Ria. I do not have an explanation. But you being there, coming to help us in our time of need, will not be a coincidence. You do not know how many healers and mages have been wounded. And with their war against the Templars, healing the injured is far from their minds. You have been a great help to us. His will may not be apparent to you now, but He always waits for His children."

Ria peeled her hand away from her face, sighing. "For your sake… for everyone's sake, I hope you're right."

"That is a start," the woman said, smiling kindly.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Sitting on the edge of the wall, Ria contemplated what the Mother had said. Apart from her family, no one had ever really cared to ask her about her life. And there had been a strain in their relationship since her father died.

Now…

Ria sighed. The Mother had excavated memories that she never wanted to see again. Memories that she had shut away, gathering dust. Blood and hellfire, she just needed them gone from her mind. At least, that's what she told herself before every operation.

She stared at the bottle of ale in her hands. Ria laughed at herself. Only a day ago, she had told Varric she didn't drink. The truth was… she used to. Used to drink herself crazy. Until she tried to pick up the pieces again. She had thought maybe… just maybe… things would get better.

Ria popped the cork and took a sip. The cold liquid ran down her throat. She gagged.

Whatever it was, it wasn't a bottle of vodka. But it was a taste she could get used to.

She took another sip, then another.

 _The Maker's will… yeah right. Where was he when I needed Him most? Where was he when…_

Ria shook her head, not wanting to relive it. It was pointless to rebel. And she had to admit- part of her wanted to hear He was looking out for her.

In the distance, the faint outline of rugged mountains and rocky cliffs gave her a strange comfort that nothing else could. Because the steep heights towered over everything in her life. Above the misery crawling on the ground.

Then her eyes returned to Haven. All the workers, all the activity. There, she could see Varric adjusting Bianca and over there, she saw Cassandra swinging at the dummy. Cullen, too. Standing as tough as ever. And the villagers… they were so animated. People were discussing, chatting, gossiping… sharing. She never really had that before. Never really fit in. Maybe never had the _chance_ to fit in. Gloomily, her eyes continued roaming until they settled on the chantry.

Would she give faith a chance?

She couldn't deny the truth that rang in the Mother's words. Turning up in the Hinterlands at the right time- as a surgeon, finding the case on the table, being trained by Bevan, becoming the Mother's personal assistant, befriending the Inner Circle… things were running too smoothly to be a coincidence. As if every step was handed to her.

As she sighed for the second time, Ria noticed a pair of eyes watching her, expressionless.

Leliana.

The gaze was neutral, but intelligent. She could hear the cogwheels turning.

 _What are you trying to see?_ She thought, curious.

When the woman caught her looking, her eyes narrowed.

Ria frowned and looked around her. There was no one there. It lasted for a minute, and then the spymaster was striding away, her hood concealing her face.

Whatever it was, she knew that face would be on her mind before bed. Suddenly she lost her appetite for the bottle in her hand. Ria dusted her legs and stood up, facing the sun in the sky. She thought about what the Mother said, again. If she was here for a reason… then she would see it through to the end. Whatever the cost.

She had nothing to lose… right?


	4. Chapter 4: A Blade in the Night

**CHAPTER 4: A Blade in the Night**

Ria took every opportunity she had to train. Oh, she was never going to be as good as Cullen- that much was obvious. She would have to spend her whole life fighting. But she had improved a lot, and the Commander acknowledged her. That was enough for her.

And Mother Giselle was satisfied to see many of the soldiers recovering under her care. She did occasionally think of home and going back again, but things were going so well in Thedas right now that Ria had less and less thoughts of returning.

Especially because of a certain spymaster.

With all the patients that flooded in, she was constantly on her feet- which should have made it harder for them to interact. The strange thing was, no matter how busy she was, they always ended up crossing paths. When Leliana was walking around in the chantry, when Ria was drawing water, when she was fetching some elfroot, etc.

Ria could only manage a stiff "Hello" every time, rubbing the back of her neck.

On one particular day, she was partway through a thyroidectomy in the tent with Solas and her assistants. There weren't really many thyroid cases in Haven, and maybe it had to do with the low level of autoimmune diseases. Nevertheless, this time she had a chance to brush up on her skills. The problem was that she didn't have the tools she needed.

Some roughly made forceps, a scalpel from the case and some scissors. No bipolar, mosquito clamps, drains, etc. She asked the assistant to hold the subplatysmal flap. The middle thyroid vein was ligated, and she had to find the recurrent laryngeal nerve. She didn't have a nerve stimulator so she couldn't check if it was the right one. There was an artery right next to it so…

 _This has to be it. If it's not…_

Then there was a chance she might damage the nerve and the patient would wake up with a hoarse voice. Ria sighed and ligated the artery. Solas cauterized it for her with magic.

 _Now for the tricky part…_

She turned the thyroid around and looked for the small orange parathyroid glands. Before she could search, there was a rustle and the flap opened.

"Ah, Linea. Do you have the…? Oh."

It wasn't Linea. It was Leliana.

The spymaster gave a curt nod and stood at the back. "Surgeon Ria, my apologies for disturbing you. I hope you don't mind me watching."

It took her a moment to get the words out. "No… t-that's fine," she stammered.

 _Smooth. Real smooth._

She turned to Theresa, one of the healers. "Theresa, could you please get some more gauze?"

As the assistant turned to go, Ria tried to remember what she was trying to do. The parathyroids. She couldn't get a good view so she pulled one of the retractors roughly.

"Is that safe?" asked the spymaster.

Ria tried to breathe through her mask in the cramped space. "Yes, don't worry. We have the patient under anaesthesia. It's also in good position."

Fearing she wouldn't be able to finish it by talking to the woman, Ria quickly turned back.

 _By God, she's so distracting._

She hesitated. Neither did she want to look like she was ignoring her.

"Would you… like to come closer?"

The Orlesian angled her head. "Are you sure? I don't want to interrupt…"

"As long as you don't faint," said Ria.

She walked to the table.

"Wait. Not too close. This is sterile area. Just there will be fine."

The woman nodded.

Ria turned back to the thyroid. She cleared away some of the tissue that was obscuring her view. Then at the superior pole she found it- a small, very pale orange mass. Preserving that and the other ones, she cut out the thyroid with relish.

Sighing, she ripped off her mask and left Solas to seal the wound. Besides, his magic would be safer than suturing. Ria felt Leliana's eyes on her as she took her gown and gloves off. Even when she was cleaning her hands, that gaze was burning a hole in her back. The rest of the healers and Solas left the tent.

Ria finally faced her. Her heart was beating so fast it could turn to arrhythmia.

"Well… I hope that didn't disgust you too much."

A rare smile appeared. "No… I have seen some severe injuries. But to open up the neck like that... it was fascinating."

At that, a smile pulled at Ria's lips. "Good to see someone appreciates it. I have to say, I don't usually have an audience. It was a nice change."

The Orlesian regarded her a while, and Ria started to think she'd said something wrong. The surgeon stood there uncertainly, a guarded expression on her face. She'd dealt with people like this before- indifferent and curt. But it was usually someone she wasn't attracted to. Ria swallowed.

"It is a good thing you do. Thank you for letting me stay… now, if you'll excuse me, I must attend to my duties."

And with that, the spymaster was gone.

Ria stood there, wondering if they even had the conversation at all.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Ria, please pass me that elfroot," said the Mother, kneeling next to the patient.

The surgeon obeyed.

"Now, I think that will be enough," she said, straightening. "Have you thought about our discussion?"

Ria knew which one she was talking about. "Yes… but I'm still not sure."

The Mother smiled. "It is only natural," she said, wiping her blood stained hands. "To feel abandonment by a parent is damaging to the spirit. And as children of the Maker, we cannot see, feel or hear him. That is why, when things do not happen as we expect or want them to, we despair and resent."

"Or reject the idea of his existence."

The Mother nodded. "It is your own choice to believe, for he has gifted that freedom. But faith is also from the Maker. It is the foundation of relationships. You do not truly have a relationship with someone unless you trust in them. It is only through experience and spending time with them that you begin to understand their mind. And even if you do not always understand, you trust them without question."

"I've… never done that."

Mother Giselle regarded her seriously. "Then you are missing the most important part of your life." She laid a hand on Ria's arm. "Do not let the darkness overwhelm you. There is light in this world that is waiting to be found. And when that day comes, you will open your eyes to a new life."

It sounded too good to be true, but she nodded all the same… albeit without emotion.

"In time, you will learn to let go," said the woman before leaving.

Ria returned to her own work, mind and feet heavy with burden. She didn't want to think about it. She didn't want to revisit those emotions. But she also knew that they wouldn't be hidden forever. Steeling herself, Ria walked back to the long line of patients at a tent next to Leliana's.

The spymaster wasn't there- which was a relief, since Ria knew she'd be distracted by her presence.

She ploughed through the list as the sun drifted down in the sky, wishing she had coffee to stop yawning. Finally, after multiple chest pains and infections, the last man came forward. He was in his mid forties, jaundiced and clutching his abdomen.

Ah, the typical liver patient.

Thin, no peripheral signs, JVP not elevated, mild icterus, tender RUQ, no hepatomegaly but no signs of portal hypertension.

His wife stood by nervously.

"Any other conditions he's had in the past?"

"No," the wife said. "He used to get rashes on his hands in sunlight but he tries to avoid it if possible. And… he once broke his leg last fall. Apart from that, he's been well."

 _Wait a minute…_

This sounded familiar. Ria frowned and sighed in frustration. If this was in hospital, she would order the bloods and check the liver enzymes, maybe do a biopsy. As it was, there was nothing here.

"So… Mr Landing. I don't have the tools to give a definitive diagnosis, but-"

The patient frowned. "Diag…?"

"The proper name for the disease. But I strongly suspect you have a liver problem. It's an inherited condition that causes your skin to be sensitive to light. It also causes a build up of toxic substances in your liver."

The man and his wife blinked.

"So I suggest you take this…" she handed him the afamelanotide and Vitamin D- thank God she still had those and some Thedosian pain medicine. "… And eat lots of vegetables, stay out of the sun and come back in a few weeks if the pain is ongoing."

Mr Landing nodded and his wife thanked her before walking her husband back home.

Ria tore off her gloves and breathed in the cold air before tidying up. Her assistants thanked her before leaving. She smirked. It had been many days before they accepted her. At first, their pride refused to acknowledge her leadership, but they quickly learnt that her skills were needed.

She bent down to bin the ampoules, needles and syringes. As she did so, a shadow fell over her.

The scent of flowers floated down and she knew who it was.

Ria straightened up and bowed. "My lady."

The Orlesian stared at her awhile, as if analysing her, dissecting her. She couldn't read anything in those frosty eyes.

Then she spoke: "Surgeon Ria. You seem to know a great deal than the average healer."

"I have some experience."

"I may not be trained in your art, but even I can tell that your skills are advanced… _different_ ," she said slowly, putting an emphasis on the word.

 _You're suspicious of me. Trust me, sister, I am definitely not the enemy._

"You're wondering where I learned them," Ria said. She crossed her arms and regarded the woman. The surgeon was tired, and after the scrutiny from Chancellor Roderick and the healers, she had little patience for further enmity.

Leliana seemed wary of her stance. "I am… curious."

Ria eyed her before replying. She decided it wouldn't hurt to divulge this.

"Very well. I come from a place where diseases are managed with fast acting medicine and many complicated procedures. We deal with illnesses microscopically and macroscopically, using technology beyond the knowledge of your healers. We don't use magic but manipulate electromagnetic radiation and sound for less invasive techniques."

"A place that refuses to use magic?"

"A place _without_ magic."

Leliana now looked astonished. "How is this possible?" she asked, her Orlesian accent breaking through.

Ria shrugged. "We have never used magic, nor seen it. So we rely a lot on science."

The spymaster shook her head, genuinely fascinated now. "I have never heard of such a place."

"That's because it's not in Thedas."

"Who are you?" asked Leliana.

She laughed at the woman's expression. Leliana crossed her arms, raising an eyebrow.

"You look so surprised."

"If such a place exists, I must know-"

"That I'm a friend and not a foe? You think I'm a spy," Ria said. "I seem to be helping the Inquisition and yet, you know nothing of me. I appeared out of nowhere, joined the soldiers and then became Mother Giselle's personal assistant."

"You have gained Mother Giselle's trust," said Leliana with a tilt of her chin. "But I cannot let such a stranger go unwatched. Tell me… why have you come to Thedas? Surely you have nothing to do with us."

A shadow passed over Ria's face. "I wish I knew."

"What do you mean?" A crease appeared between her brows.

The surgeon fingered the case in her hands. "Simple: I don't know why I'm here."

Leliana looked at her doubtfully. "How can you not know?"

Ria paused before gesturing to the chantry. It was bad enough Leliana was suspicious of her- she didn't want any more people to listen to their conversation.

"Can we talk somewhere more private?"

The woman nodded and followed her into chantry, where they entered her chamber. She shut the door behind her and suddenly wavered. Ria wasn't sure why she was telling this to Leliana, who obviously didn't trust her. But Leliana was a powerful person with widespread influence. There was a small hope she would know something, _anything_ about what the hell Ria was doing here.

The former bard waited for her expectantly.

"I fell asleep in the hospital and woke up in the middle of the Hinterlands. I have no memory of how I got there. They mistook me for a soldier, I trained with them but joined Mother Giselle instead because I thought I could be of more use with her. This is all as bizarre for me as it is for you."

Leliana studied her for a few minutes, her expression indecipherable.

 _Well, this is it,_ thought Ria in resignation. Judging from the silence, she had the feeling she would be dismissed as some crazed lunatic... or worse, the story would give the spymaster further cause to suspect Ria's intentions.

The woman gave her a sideways glance. "And you said you have no magic in your world. How can I believe that?"

Ria shrugged. "There's none that I've ever seen. I'm sorry... I can't really prove that to you."

Leliana paused, considering the information she had been given. The woman circled the surgeon, face giving nothing away.

"The reports have indeed described your arrival as you said- suddenly in the middle of the Hinterlands. But who is to say you were transported by a mage? What proof do you have of a world like yours existing?"

"I..." started Ria. She sighed in frustration. "Look, you're going to have to-"

 _Hang on..._

The surgeon held out the case in her hand to Leliana. "You've probably seen me use this by now, but take a look again. This contains medical equipment from my world- I guarantee you won't find anything like these in all of Thedas."

The spymaster received it, again with an unreadable expression. She opened it and scanned the contents quickly before shutting it.

"You will excuse me for being cautious, but I must let my agents examine these... as well as your other possessions before I can be sure of your intent."

 _Everything?_ thought Ria with a grimace.

"Alright," she said after a while. What choice did she have? "Feel free to go through them... I don't really have much anyway."

Leliana nodded curtly. "I will return the case to you as soon as it is confirmed to be safe." Then she swept out of the room coolly, leaving Ria standing there feeling empty without the case. Though she had done nothing wrong, the spymaster had the discomforting power to make one feel guilty without reason.

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That night, the spymaster slept fitfully. Faces from her past returned in the shadows of the castle, haunting her. She was standing on a precipice, high above the roaring waters, soaked in the torrential rain. Pillars of rock stood surrounding her as she held the dagger against Marjolaine's throat. Those deceiving lips curved upwards.

"My sweet Leliana… you don't have the courage to kill me." Her voice was leisurely, mocking.

The emotions from that memory rolled in, letting a tremor rock her hand. Leliana's mouth stretched thin and she pressed the blade closer to the flesh.

"Why did you betray me?" her voice thick with pain.

"I couldn't let you run free now, could I?" The older woman's face hardened. "You saw things that you should not have seen. It was a simple order, a simple mission." She tutted. "And yet you let your curiosity ruin _everything_."

Leliana shook her head. "I wanted to protect you."

"Ah… so sweet of you." Her master turned her head, blood trickling down her neck. "But _so_ naïve!"

The spymaster screamed as Marjolaine's face changed into the withered face of a Fear demon. She swung her daggers at the creature, backing away as its extra limbs tried to rake her. It managed to tear her sleeve, drawing blood. The cut felt real as it seared and throbbed.

Leliana flung her dagger at it desperately. The weapon struck home.

With a tortured scream, the demon disintegrated into ashes. But the Orlesian's relief was short lived as the demon was replaced by a shadowed figure, towering over the Divine.

"Divine Justinia!" she cried out, an icy feeling in her gut.

When the enemy turned around, she saw blood red eyes… eyes as red as the pulsing energy of red lyrium.

"We have an intruder in our midst."

"Run, Leliana!" shouted the Divine, her grey eyes wide with fear. Fear for her.

"No!" the spymaster yelled before she had to shield her eyes from a blinding green light.

She dropped to her knees in defeat, tears burning in her eyes. She couldn't even speak, couldn't even sob in mourning for her mentor.

But the dreams were not done torturing her. Her environment shifted, and she was standing at the top of the tower. The sound of cheering, the smell of smoke and of burnt flesh. It was all too familiar.

She felt herself walk lifelessly to the body on the blood smeared ground.

All the dwarves and Templars were cheering around her, but she didn't notice. She didn't even respond when Alistair put a hand on her shoulder. All she could see was the still body of the elf, dark eyes staring at the sky. The sounds died down to a hushed silence as they saw her gaze down, expressionless. Leliana fell to her knees, hands shaking as she touched the pale face. She ran her fingers over the lips, the nose and then the eyes. Finally, the tears fell hot and endless.

The bard pulled the lifeless body close to her, cradling it. A tremor racked her body, and she sobbed as she held her lover.

 _Kallian… my Kallian…_

Then the elf dissolved into the air, leaving Leliana holding nothing. A hollowness settled in her heart as she realized it was just a dream. A dream… that's what it was.

Leliana opened her eyes, bitterness twisting her mouth. It was always this… it _always_ ended with this. Because someone clearly knew what truly cut her to the deep. She closed her eyes tightly, wanting to wipe away the memory of that pain, the sight of that face. But it was always useless.

The woman turned on her side, as if a change in position would change the next dream that visited her. But it was a subtle sound that alerted her expert ears.

A soft _snick_ in the keyhole made her hand immediately reach for the dagger under her pillow. Narrowing her eyes, Leliana tensed her whole body as the intruder entered. Soft footsteps drifted in. Her frown deepened. Whatever they were trying to do, whoever they were, the person was clearly not a competent spy. The noise level was more than enough to wake her even in sleep.

Nevertheless, she prepared for the assault.

They were closer now. She heard the muffled contact of metal on a leg- they were armed. A sword by the sound of it. Even breathing- they had done this before. Steady pace- they were taking their time.

It was her chance.

Leliana flung the bedsheet aside and swung the dagger, only to miss as she stared in shock at the intruder. There, washed white in the moonlight, stood Kallian.

There was a sharp _twang_ as the blade lodged itself in the wall beside the door, vibrating.

"Shit!" the other woman said, putting a hand over her heart. Leliana closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose when she realized it was the surgeon.

"Surgeon Ria, _what_ are you doing here!" she hissed, glaring at the unexpected visitor.

The woman shook her head, holding up a hand. "This isn't what it looks like. I came here to check on you." Then she flushed as she saw the thin nightgown Leliana was wearing. She cleared her throat and her expression turned serious. "I heard noises around in the chantry a few minutes ago. There's a shady looking man lurking around and he last came this way. I think we should have a look into this."

Leliana nodded, already standing up. She threw her cloak over herself and strapped on her daggers and bow. There was no time to put on armour.

"Lead the way," she said.

Ria nodded and strode-no, _marched_ out of the chamber like a soldier. As she followed, the spymaster couldn't help but stare at the straight back and dark hair. It was shocking how similar she was to Kallian. No wonder she had mistaken her for the elf.

Always serious, always focussed.

The two of them snuck downstairs to the door on the far right. They didn't have to worry about making a noise because the door was wide open. Leliana frowned- she wasn't sure if it _was_ an assassin or not, but this led to the Herald's bedchamber. The surgeon kept one hand on the hilt of her sword, starting to advance at a low crouch. At the end of the corridor, they stopped at the Herald's bedroom. The door was open.

Ria glanced back to exchange looks with her. Leliana held up three fingers and the surgeon nodded, understanding.

 _One, two, three!_

The two rushed in just in time to see a darkly clad man holding a dagger over the Herald. He whirled around to see them and hurled the weapon at them. The two dodged and Leliana rolled to the side. She came up to see Ria engaging the man with her sword- the intruder had drawn two blades himself. Trevelyan bolted up in bed and grabbed his weapon, lunging at the assassin.

Leliana flung her dagger at the man, and was surprised to see it deflected. Whoever he was, he was expertly trained in combat. Even with the three of them attacking, the man was able to hold his own. With a backward kick, he knocked the surgeon to the ground and landed a flurry of blows on Trevelyan. Leliana joined the fray and brought her twin daggers down. The assassin bent his body at such a strange angle that she thought he would break. But the man simply straightened and pulled her into a vice like grip, his blade at her throat. With the other arm, he hit the Herald with his pommel and Maxwell staggered. Leliana tried to stab him but his blade dug into flesh. Then the weight on her neck loosened as the assassin doubled over.

The spymaster twisted out of his grasp to see Ria bringing her pommel down to his back. But before she could, the man rolled out of the way, hissing. Trevelyan slashed at him but he dodged that too. The sword struck the wooden floor and the man knocked it away with his own. He was about to strike the Herald when Leliana stopped him with a quick uppercut. Then she kicked one sword out of his hand, breaking the bone. The man howled but still lunged at the Herald.

Leliana prepared to throw her final dagger when there was a blur. He and Ria crashed to the floor. The surgeon made no hesitation as she dug the sword into his abdomen.

There was a silence in the room as the three of them stared at the corpse. Ria was kneeling next to it, hands shaking and blood splattered all over her. The silence was only interrupted when the rest of the Inner Circle ran in. Cassandra gaped at the body, eyes flashing.

"What happened?!"

Solas knelt down and examined the body, supporting himself with the staff. He looked under the cloak to reveal the breastplate. His eyes were grave when he stood up.

"This is of Tevinter make."

" _Tevinter?_ " said Varric, stomping in with his crossbow. "How the hell are _they_ involved in this?"

"Don't ask _us_ ," said the Herald, shaking his head.

"No, but we will make sure that we find out," said Leliana, narrowing her eyes. "The attacker had no trouble with infiltration. He reached the Herald's chamber and nearly ended all our efforts tonight. He was very skilled, very dangerous. If not for Surgeon Ria's alert, he could have succeeded."

Trevelyan nodded, recovering from the shock of the event. "Yes, I have to thank the both of you for coming to help. I guess I would have just… kept on sleeping if you hadn't barged in," he said with a nervous laugh.

"Well, well," said the Seeker. "It seems that our surgeon can be of greater use."

Leliana nodded, and looked down to see Ria still staring at the bloody corpse. A twinge of sympathy made her reach down and pull her up. "But now that the danger is over," she said, directing her gaze to the rest of them. "We _must_ double- no, _triple_ our security in Haven. There has been an attack on the Herald's life, and all the soldiers must be alerted to this. We cannot afford another one of these slip ups."

"Understood," said Cassandra, nodding. She turned and left with Solas.

Varric slung the crossbow on his back..

"You three alright?" asked the dwarf, concerned. "That must have been quite a fight, especially if he took on all of you at once."

"It was crazy, but I'm not hurt," said the Herald, shaking his head. He patted Ria on the shoulder. "You made some good moves there, Surgeon."

"First time, huh?" said Varric, gesturing at the body. "Just take a rest today, kid. It's not easy, making your first kill."

Ria nodded slowly. Leliana sighed and took her arm, pulling her to the door. The woman didn't refuse, but followed wordlessly.

"Alright… well, I'll trust you to look after her, Sister Nightingale," said the dwarf. "She's going to have a rough night. Let me know if you want a drink tomorrow, surgeon."

"Take care, Ria," said the Herald.

Leliana took the surgeon to the fresh air outside, leading her to the fire. Ria still hadn't said a word. Her dark eyes were like obsidian, reflecting the flickering flames. Leliana also turned her gaze to the fire, hugging herself.

"I was like that myself when I first killed," she began.

The surgeon turned her eyes to the spymaster.

"When I spilled the blood from his throat, I sat next to him shaking for Maker knows how long."

Ria nodded, again slowly. "It's just… I've only ever used a blade for surgery. I never imagined I would use one to kill."

"It is the nature of war," said Leliana, sighing. "And it was my life in Orlais… the plotting, the killing. It was a Game played by the nobles everywhere."

The surgeon didn't reply immediately. "You live in a strange world."

At this, Leliana laughed softly. "Yes, I suppose I do. But that is reality in Thedas, and we must all do the best we can to survive. It gets… easier after a while."

"I hope so."

"It does… especially when you know that what you did was necessary. Whatever happened, know that your act was in defence of the hope of all Thedas."

Those onyx eyes turned back to her, and she looked so achingly like Kallian that Leliana averted her eyes.

"Your job must be a heavy burden to you."

"… yes. I do what must be done, and I cannot waste time dwelling on my emotions. It is for the Inquisition, for the sake of us all."

The surgeon nodded. "I understand. But… take care not to lose yourself in your work. Sometimes, feeling the emotions isn't always a weakness."

Leliana looked up at the comment.

There was a flicker of something behind Ria's eyes. Her face looked older, weary. Then it was gone.

"Thank you… for your words. That was a bit of a shock for me back there. It's good to know that someone else went through the same thing."

The spymaster nodded. "You're welcome. It was the least I could do for your help. Though… it would have been nice if you had given me some sort of warning back in my room."

A sheepish grin appeared on the surgeon's face. Leliana found herself thinking that she looked much more attractive with a smile.

 _What am I thinking?_

"Yeah… sorry about that. I was going to, but I wasn't sure if you were sleeping."

A smile tugged at the corner of the spymaster's lips. "I could have skewered you with my dagger."

"Oh, I'll definitely be careful next time. Remind me not to come near you," said Ria with that grin. Then it disappeared as she looked into the flames again, serious and dark.

The Orlesian wondered at this- wondered at how those expressions could flick back and forth so readily. She and Ria drifted into a comfortable silence, with only the crackle of fire and the sounds of soldiers in the night air. Then she jumped as she felt a weight around her shoulders.

"It's cold out here- we don't want you catching the flu, Sister Nightingale," said the surgeon, rubbing her hands in front of the fire.

Leliana fingered the jacket around her, surprised. "Thank you…"

"Don't mention it. It's my job, remember?"

"Yes… I suppose it is."

And as they stood there warming their hands, Leliana felt an inexplicable peace under the stars. She found, for the first time in many years, that she was looking up at the night sky… without feeling the gravity of everything in her past.


	5. Chapter 4a: To Kill or Not to Kill

**CHAPTER 4A: To Kill or Not to Kill**

After the attempted assassination, the guards on patrol were tripled. They were not going to take any risks- especially since no one had detected the man sneaking in. Cullen was beside himself with anger, disbelieving that it could have happened so easily. And yet, it had occurred. And since recovering from the shock, Ria had steadily begun to notice the changes in how people treated her. She was not just the surgeon anymore… she was the soldier who saved the Herald's life. Now, everywhere she went people clapped her on the back and thanked her. Ria didn't think she really deserved it, especially since both Leliana and the Herald were there fighting as well. She just happened to take the right opportunity.

Anyway, it wasn't the only thing that was occupying her mind right now. It seemed that some of the guards were actually injured when the assassin came. Two were even killed. Ria felt an odd twinge in her gut as she saw the white cloth covering their bodies. She had seen this a lot. Thousands of times, in fact. But she'd been spending the last few months with these people. Sometimes, the guards even talked to her- made small talk, cracked jokes. Maker, it actually _hurt_.

 _I'm getting soft…_

Ria returned the syringe to the case, smirking as she remembered the spymaster returning it to her. The agents had found nothing wrong with it and had looked through her pack with close scrutiny. However, again the result was the same. When she scanned the crowds, Ria could no longer see as many agents following her around from a distance. Saving the Herald had scored her some bonus points with the spymaster- at least that was something positive in this situation.

She read the next name out on the list. A frail old woman came forward, and the surgeon could hear her rattling breath from meters away. She was emaciated, weak and tottering. A nearby healer helped her into the chair. The sharp angles of bone protruded from under thin skin. Here and there, there were patches of blue and black bruises. Eyes were bloodshot and constricted.

"Ms Dale?" she asked uncertainly. The age on the list was sixty, but the woman looked eighty.

"That's me," the woman said with a faint smile. Her voice was harsh and raspy.

"I understand you have breathing problems."

 _Well done, captain obvious._

But the patient laughed- no, cackled.

"I've smoked myself to death, deary."

Ria nodded, unable to think of a reply to that. While the Thedosians didn't smoke cigarettes, there was an illegal weed-like substance that some smoked through a pipe.

"I see," she said. "Well, we'll do what we can to help you manage."

Ms Dale nodded and patted her on the arm. "Good to hear that. Now, I've been getting more wheezy and coughing up some crap over the last few weeks. In the past, it was just yellow or white, but now I've been spitting out blood."

Ria asked Solas to help her listen to the lungs. Global expiratory wheezing, bilateral crepitations, dull to percussion. No other signs.

"Have you been feeling feverish or unwell?"

"Oh, _definitely._ I haven't been feeling myself since years ago. But this last hit is making my joints creak like rickety stairs. A bit of a temperature too."

Ria nodded, already reaching for the makeshift inhalers the healers had helped designed.

"Alright, we've got some salbu- I mean, inhalers for you to use. And some antibiotics. It sounds like you have an infective exacerbation."

"An infective what? I can't hear you clearly, dear."

"Exacerbation," said Ria loudly, smiling. "Now, I've got a few questions before you go. Any regular medication?"

"Apart from the spindleweed and foxshit they gave me last time? Nothing."

 _Did she mean foxmint?_ "Okay…" Ria said dubiously. She would have to educate the others on B agonists and anti cholinergics. "Any allergies?"

"Blood lotus!" the patient said in disgust. "Those give me rashes."

The surgeon laughed. "Alright. Family history of anything?"

"What do you want to know? My father died of the wasting illness, mother died when I was ten. And my daughter eloped with some farmer. I have no husband."

"Oh…" said Ria awkwardly. "I'm… sorry to hear that."

"No need to be, dear. It was a long time ago." She laughed but the lines around her eyes showed the sorrow she tried to hide.

Ria continued with the social history and shook her hand again. "It's good that you came to see me. Try the inhalers out and come back if you have any more problems."

"Oh, yes. And what about the blood? Does that mean I'm dying?"

"Er… it happens sometimes when you cough too much. I wouldn't worry about it at the moment if it's just little droplets."

"Good, good," said the patient, standing up. Then she squinted at Ria. "By Andraste, you're _gorgeous_!"

The surgeon blinked. "Um…"

"I didn't know they made people like you in Thedas. You don't look Ferelden."

Ria smiled awkwardly. "I'm not."

"Well, in any case. Bless the Maker for people like you. I won't keep the others waiting," she said, glancing back at the line. "Until we meet again."

She left the surgeon blinking after her. Ria chuckled, shaking her head. She'd met plenty of strange people in her life, but that woman was… one of a kind.

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After her usual shift, Ria walked to the training grounds. She was slightly nervous, because ever since her 'deed' a few nights ago, Cullen hadn't stopped driving her mad.

"You're made of tougher mettle than I thought!" he had said, grinning. "You have the gratitude of the Inquisition. But let's see if we can make you Darkspawn proof!"

Ria winced with each stride, feeling the bruises and stretched ligaments. There was seriously a chance that Cullen would train her to death before she ever saw a monster. But it seemed that someone else was waiting for her at the sparring grounds.

The surgeon stopped in her tracks when she saw the woman.

Leliana was talking with one of her agents, who was sighing. The spymaster looked angry about something. Ria angled her head and approached them, wondering what was going on.

"There were so many questions surrounding Farrier's death. Did he _think_ we wouldn't notice?" the spymaster said, disgust contorting her features. She shook her head. "You know what must be done. Make it quick… painless if you can."

Ria frowned. "What's going on?"

She trained that ice cold gaze on her, hesitating. Then: "Farrier, one of my best agents, is dead. And the killer knows where all the others are."

"So you're going to kill him- make things even."

The woman's eyes narrowed at the unspoken accusation. "Yes. As I told you before, I do what is necessary."

Ria returned the cool gaze, her mouth firm. "I'm sure you do. But I wonder… is this really necessary?"

Leliana glared at her. "He _betrayed_ us. He _murdered_ my agent."

"And you would kill him? Just like that?"

Her eyes flashed dangerously. "You find fault with my decision?" It was a challenge.

"I'm sure you are the best spymaster there is, and many would trust you with their lives. But in this, I have to disagree."

"My _agents_ are in danger!" said the woman, suddenly fired up. "I condemned one man to save dozens! I may not like what I do, but it must be done. I cannot afford the luxury of ideals at a time like this."

Ria considered what she said. A while ago, she might have agreed with those words. But now… every life, every decision mattered more to her than they ever did. After glimpsing into the lives of people in Haven, she realized there was a story to tell for each and every one of them. This killer- he might have done a terrible thing, but who knew what his story was? In any case, murder to combat murder was not the answer.

"I think having ideals is all the more important in a time like this." She tapped her fingers on the hilt of her sword.

 _There's enough bitterness in the world with me being who I am. What happened to you?_

Ria sighed. "Tell you what- why don't we have a duel? If I win, you spare that man's life. If you win, I won't say any more on the matter."

Besides, judging from Leliana's presence and Cullen's absence, it was clear that the Commander had planned this from the beginning. Probably a test of some sort. She threw the shield down on the ground.

The spymaster scowled but drew her daggers. She dismissed her agent and he gave one worried look at the surgeon before leaving. _Be careful._

"Fine. I see you feel strongly about this. But let me make it very clear to you: I _will_ win."

Ria hoped she would perform as confidently as she sounded. "You don't know that," she said with a slight smile.

An answering smile appeared on the former bard's face despite herself. "Let's see how well you fare."

The spymaster was the first to lunge, slashing down with her blades with a ferocity that staggered her. Ria was holding a sword, but the strength that bore down was unexpected. She banged the daggers away, eyes narrowed. The two circled each other carefully, trying to predict the next move.

The surgeon feinted to the left and rolled to the woman's right, making a horizontal cut. Leliana hissed and managed to block her just in time. Ria had to give it to the spymaster- she was a master with daggers. Her training with Cullen was paying off, helping her to execute the right moves for the different style. But even with the weight of her sword, the daggers slipped through her defences sometimes. It was all she could do to dodge those edges.

Finally, Ria found an opening and tried to disarm her. But the spymaster was too quick. She took the chance to twist out of the way and actually used Ria's _back_ to change position. The contact jarred her. She barely brought her sword up to block Leliana's dagger. The sharp edge was an inch from her chin. A fleeting smile sent shivers down her spine.

But then it was gone and they twisted away from each other. Ria wiped the sweat off her upper lip, watching the woman warily. And they were at it again, lunging at each other. Slash, uppercut, parry, twist. The dance went on for Maker knows how long. She knocked Leliana over once, but the spymaster wrapped her legs around Ria's, twisting her off balance. Unfortunately, the manoeuvre didn't go as planned. The surgeon fell forward, scraping her hand on the rocks. She landed on the ground push-up style, her face just an inch above the spymaster's. They both blinked.

Ria could see every detail on that porcelain face- every eyelash, maybe even the zonules in her irises, the glossy sheen of her lips…

With a cough, she got up. The two dusted themselves and stood awkwardly, the fight forgotten.

"Well…" said Leliana, pulling at her sleeves. "I suppose we should stop here." She looked up at the sun, which was nearly down. "Let us call it even… you have become very competent. Cullen has trained you well."

The spymaster started to walk away.

"Wait!" said Ria, confused. "Then… what's your decision?"

The Orlesian's face was covered by her hood as she half turned. "Perhaps you are right. I will think of another way to deal with this man."

Ria stared at the woman's back as she strode away, the sun's rays glinting off her armour.

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Apart from Varric, Ria liked having Vivienne and Josephine around. She knew a lot of gamers hated Vivienne's stuck up attitude, but that woman strongly reminded her of a previous colleague. Underneath the self- confidence was a vulnerability, and there was humour in the condescending tone if you listened closely. On the other hand, Josephine was like a sister, playful yet intelligent. She was someone you quickly grew fond of. Back home, she didn't have many female friends, but these two were easy to get along with.

It was one afternoon on a day when she first met Josephine. The healers had offered to take over for her since most of the patients were pretty much manageable cases. Ria agreed but found she had nothing to do. So she sat on one of the chantry chairs with a piece of parchment on her lap and started sketching with charcoal.

Before she wanted to be a doctor, Ria had wanted to be an artist. Her path had taken an unexpected turn but art would always be a part of her life. She spent hours drawing the chantry when there was an exclamation of delight. Ria jumped in the chair.

"Did _you_ draw that? My, but that is good!" Josephine gushed, walking quickly to Ria.

A flush heated her cheeks as she sat there awkwardly. "Er…"

The advisor leaned in, trying to get a better look. "You are a woman of many talents! I have heard much about you." Then she took in Ria's expression and smiled. "Forgive me, we have not met- I am Josephine Montilyet, advisor to the Herald."

Ria resisted the urge to say _I know_. "A pleasure. Surgeon Ria, at your service."

Josephine's smile widened to reveal perfectly white teeth.

They talked a lot more after that, and she liked how Josephine chatted about inconsequential things. Though… the talk about shoes and fashion was really beyond her.

Today, though, Josephine yawned a lot in the armchair of her room. Vivienne joined them and dominated most of the conversation, which Ria didn't mind. She wasn't much of a talker anyway.

"…And, my dear," she said to Ria. "Are you quite sure you don't want to join us in a mission? We could use your skills on the field. I can seal the wounds, repair the damage, but you can read the signs better than I. And you're not too bad with that sword of yours."

Ria considered this. "Well… we've treated most of the wounded and I guess the only patients left are the minor cases. That sounds okay."

At this, Josephine straightened up. " _Definitely_ ," she said in her unique accent. "We've had recent reports about Empress Celene. It seems she is in danger and has enlisted the help of the Inquisition."

"Do you need me there?" asked Ria dubiously.

"Well, not really," said Josephine slyly. "But you _have_ to attend this one! There will be a grand ball at the palace in Orlais. Trust me, you don't want to miss it!"

Ria coughed. "I've never been much of a dancer…"

"Nonsense, dear!" laughed Vivienne. "It's really not that difficult. I'm sure you will do _just_ fine."

"Yes, we'll give you lessons before you go." said Josephine, waving an airy hand. "And think of the dresses, the shoes, the fashion!"

 _Oh great…_

"I really don't-"

"Hmm, I think you would look best in those royal blue Antivan jackets with the elaborate tails. Or maybe dark red?" suggested Vivienne, looking at her with a critical eye.

"No," said Josephine, shaking her head. "She needs a _dress_ , the ones that are favoured in Orlais right now. Rose pink or deep blue."

Ria stared at her, one eye twitching.

"You're joking. I think I prefer the jacket."

"Well, it's up to you, Ria dear. I think you suit both, but I agree with you about the jacket."

"What, and be twins with Cassandra?" said Josephine exasperatedly. "You would look _lovely_ in a dress."

"Not this time, Josephine."

" _Josie_ , I said. Urgh, Josephine makes me sound like an old lady."

Ria laughed. "Okay, Josie then. I want to pick out my own clothes."

She sighed. "Alright, then. But _I_ get to choose who you dance with."

"Deal. But you better not pair me up with some oily, fat geezer."

At that, Vivienne laughed loudly. "Believe me, my dear. Josephine would _never_ choose someone like that."

"Never," said Josie, offended. "I promise, you will be dancing with someone beautiful."

"Good," said Ria, grinning.

"Speaking of dancing…" the mage continued, and Ria lost concentration as the door opened. A light step in, one slender foot after the other. The grace of an Orlesian.

"Josie," she called. "They have returned."

Ria marvelled as Josephine's relaxed face shifted into business mode. She wasn't an advisor for nothing.

They all filed out of the room and walked to the Herald and his group, who all looked weary as hell. Blood coated their armour and shields.

Ria hung back, leaning against the wall to observe from afar. Besides, this was inner circle business- somewhere a surgeon didn't belong. To her surprise, Vivienne turned around and spotted her.

"Come, Surgeon Ria. You should hear this also."

At that, everyone looked at her. Feeling a bit self-conscious, Ria walked over to them, aware of Leliana's gaze.

She wondered if the spymaster thought she wasn't worthy of this honour.

"Now," said Cullen, emerging from the war room. "What news, Herald?"

The Herald smiled grimly. "We have allied with the Templars, and Lord Seeker Lucius is dead."

"Well, that's certainly good news," said the Commander, his shoulders relaxing.

"Indeed," said Leliana. "Now all that remains is for us to close the Breach and gather more allies for the upcoming battle."

"Yes," said Trevelyan, and Ria felt sorry for him as he looked ready to collapse on his feet.

"Maybe you could use some rest, in the meantime," suggested Ria, eying the angle of Cassandra's arm and Varric's blood stained leg. In fact, they all probably needed a check up.

The Herald gave her a grateful smile.

"That would be excellent," said Cassandra. "I think I may have dislocated my elbow."

Varric made a great show of groaning. "Oh, and my leg feels funny. I think I'm bleeding something terrible."

Solas smiled, amused but Blackwall grunted. "Since when did you become whining ninnies?"

"We're all kids at heart, Warden," said Ria, grinning. "Come this way, I'll take care of your wounds."

The heroes followed her into a procedure room in the east wing of the chantry.

"It's good to know you, Surgeon," said Varric.

"Cheers, Varric."


	6. Chapter 4B: Opening the Heart

_**Hey guys, thanks for reading this and also for the reviews. Just a bit about the story- it started off as a personal one I wrote when I was going through a difficult time. So it might get a little emotional... just to prepare you lol. Anyway, after some contemplation I finally decided to upload it on fanfic to share it. Hope you enjoy it as much as I did writing it. And things will get brighter as the story continues, don't worry :p... and more exciting, of course. Keep the reviews coming, I want to know what you think of it.**_

 **CHAPTER 4B: Opening the Heart**

The rising sun, the sound of birdcall.

She hadn't noticed these things for years. Ria straightened up from arranging equipment. Bronze rays struck the weapons and shields, seeming to set them on fire. As always, Haven was a flurry of activity. They wouldn't rest till the war was over. But the energy… the determination on their faces.

It was enough to inject her own blood with a surge of adrenaline.

A woman passed by, carrying a heavy bucket. Ria didn't think twice about helping her. She looked up and thanked her with a smile. The old Ria wouldn't have done that. She would have let her pass by- not because she was heartless, but because that was what people did. Back at home.

Over the months she'd been here, Ria had changed. Friendship, altruism, hope, purpose…

She would have scoffed at these- dismissed them as soft ideals for soft people. Everything was about climbing over someone else, getting up to the top of the ladder. People treated you as friends until they found a reason to drop you. But here... these values somehow found their way into her heart.

Theresa, her assistant, was handing her the poultice. Ria thanked her and said hello to the first patient. It turned out to be a keratoacanthoma. Normally, she would scowl and think of what a waste of time it was. And now… she actually took the time to reassure and explain.

"Don't worry, sir. It's a self-healing growth of tissue on sun damaged sites. Nothing to be concerned about."

"So it's not a tumour?"

"Not a bad one, no. It will disappear."

"Oh! That's a relief!" the man said, laughing. "I _told_ Hilda that it was nothing."

Ria laughed with him. "Well now you can go back and tell her the doctor said so."

"Thank you, surgeon. The Maker bless you."

And she worked through the list, seeing some unique cases as well. Sometimes, she asked the healers to teach her about new diseases. After all, she didn't know all about medicine. In the past, she'd never have allowed such a blow to her pride. Another thing that changed.

And the _favour_ she earned with people- that was something else she didn't understand. Ever since the Hinterlands, she had met the right people, struck the right cord with them and now even in Thedas she was gaining a good reputation. And after seeing her do her job, the Chancellor's sneers gradually died away.

 _I don't deserve this._

Nevertheless, it happened. She found herself grinning like an idiot.

And she was still grinning like an idiot when familiar footsteps came. Ria read the name without really comprehending.

"Sister Nightingale… oh."

Ria looked up to see the woman. Her heart lurched down as it missed a beat. She hoped she wasn't blushing. Leliana seated herself in the chair. The surgeon was alarmed to see the arrow sticking out of her abdomen. Blood soaked through the clothes like dye.

Ria frowned . "What happened! Let me see."

The spymaster lifted up her tunic. Ria hesitated when she saw the creamy skin, but didn't delay after seeing the wound. She examined and felt around it. Not too deep, and traction felt like it wasn't embedded in the gut. The arrow was probably about to skim her torso before it pierced the skin.

Ria shook her head. "You're lucky it didn't go in deeper," she said, then realized it sounded like scolding. "How are you feeling?" she tried again in a better tone.

"I'm fine," said the spymaster.

 _Sure…_

"Not feeling dizzy?" Ria asked, putting on the gloves- Solas had made it sterile for the day.

"Maybe a little," said the Orlesian with a small smile.

The surgeon washed the wound, took some forceps and pulled it out smoothly. Leliana hissed as it was done. The healers would usually dress it, but Ria found her hands were already moving of their own accord. Ria tried not to look at the woman's face as she dressed it.

"Thank you."

The surgeon floundered about before settling with: "You're welcome."

Leliana rose from the chair, one hand over the wound.

Without thinking, Ria held her arm. The spymaster looked down at her hand and Ria snatched it away. "I don't think you're in the shape to walk by yourself. Let one of the healers take you."

Before Leliana could reply, Ria nodded at Theresa, who bowed before escorting the spymaster away.

While they left, the woman glanced back. And something in those eyes stirred up a wave of emotion in Ria's gut. She couldn't explain it… only that it was like a story long lost.

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That night, Ria lay in her bed. She put her hands behind her head, rolled to her side and buried her face in her pillow. No matter what position she was in, she couldn't sleep.

Leliana's face was stamped in her mind permanently.

No one had affected her like this before- how could one _look_ make her so weak?

Her whole life, she'd barrelled on to her goal like there was no tomorrow. Relationships were burdens, a hindrance. Ria used to dream of meeting someone she would want to spend the rest of her life with. That hope had shrivelled up years ago. But why did she feel such a connection with this woman?

Those eyes and that voice were icy cold… but something in them made her curious. Something made her want to take away the brittle stones in them and learn the pain in their depths.

Strength, devotion, capability- these were all traits she admired. On top of that she was beautiful, graceful and alluring. She was in danger of losing herself to this woman.

Ria gritted her teeth, groaning. Work was her life, it was her lifeline. This was new for her, this weakness. She didn't like being under the power of another.

At this rate, she wouldn't get any sleep at all.

The surgeon sighed and jumped out of bed, heading to the attic room.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Mother Giselle was kneeling in front of Andraste when Ria walked in. She stopped, surprised.

 _What's she doing here at this time?_

The woman's head was bowed, her shoulders bent. She looked so small and weak that the surgeon wondered if this was the right person. At her footsteps, the Mother straightened up but didn't stand.

"Mother Giselle?" Ria asked tentatively. She had never seen her like this before.

The Mother stayed silent for a while before responding.

"I am alright, child."

Ria was speechless when she saw tear tracks on her cheeks.

"Are you… are you sure?"

"Quite certain," said the Mother, smiling. She wiped the moisture away. "I would have preferred that you did not see me like this… but perhaps it was inevitable."

The surgeon stood there awkwardly, waiting. There was something held in the woman's hands. Mother Giselle followed her gaze and she chuckled.

"This was a gift, a gift to my son," she said, holding out a necklace.

A small bronze shield was attached, and she flipped it over to see one word inscribed: love.

"You had a son?"

The Mother nodded, pain flicking across her face. "Once. Before I took my vows… I had a lover. He was a charming man, and swept me away with one glance. I was young, and his words were sweet. And then I was with child." She shook her head sadly. "He left me before my son was born."

Ria grimaced. "I can't believe he left you."

"Yes, but… that is life. And I was a poor commoner. His family had other plans for him. So, I raised my son without him."

"That must have been very difficult for you."

"Oh, I had my mother to help me. But yes, it was not the easiest time." She gazed down at the necklace. "On his seventh name day, I gave him this. To remind him that even in the darkness, love is our shield. It is the most important thing in life. Without it, can anyone live? They would be a shadow, a body that walks around, talks but no different from the dead."

Ria nodded. "I… am beginning to understand that."

The Mother regarded her fondly. "And I have seen the change in you, my dear. The Maker's favour is there, and I am proud of you. There is an openness to you that was hidden away. Now, it is revealed in the light of the Maker."

"It took a while. I just… shut myself away after… after things happened."

The other woman nodded. "And that is how I responded when life's course became twisted. I was afraid, angry and resentful. To escape the pain, we choose to reject, to ridicule the kinder possibility… not knowing that He does not condemn. If you listen closely, he is there waiting in the stillness."

"And how did you… come to know the Maker?"

"After I tried to kill myself."

"I'm sorry?" asked Ria, eyes widening.

A small smile touched her lips, but her eyes were pools of emotion.

"A plague spread through Velun at the time. My mother died, and she had been the only support I had. I wanted to join her, because I believed it was my fault."

A familiar feeling of dread shot through her. "How was it your fault?"

"My mother warned me not to walk the streets for too long. But I lost track of time, and soon the wanderers would come. She came to look for me, and saved me before a man molested me. He was infected, you see, and touching my mother spread the disease. We ran away before he could catch us. But it was already too late. The next morning, she was racked with fever, chills, night sweats and boils broke out over her body. She died in a few days."

"I'm so sorry…" said Ria, a huge lump in her own throat. That story she knew all too well…

"Don't be. It was a long time ago, and the pain has since faded. She died protecting me, and she carried most of my burdens. Perhaps it was time for her to rest."

"She is with the Maker now," was all Ria could offer.

"Yes. And that gives me great comfort."

Ria nodded slowly. "This all seems too much for one young woman. How did you…?"

"How did I survive? Barely. I had no money, no food for my son. I thought we would both die. I begged, begged on my knees for weeks. With that money, we survived. And then… then came the ultimate blow."

"What happened?"

"The disease came to my son. I do not know how, but he… breathed his last a few days after. So I tried to drown myself in Lake Celestine. It was foolish of me, but the Maker rescued me that day."

Ria tried to digest this horrible story.

"A local farmer found me unconscious in the water. He took me to a healer and I was nursed back to health. He even paid for my recovery. And when I woke, I never saw who my savior was. If I had, I would have at least thanked him."

Ria was reminded of the story of the Good Samaritan.

She continued: "But I was alive… and I returned to my home. It was no longer mine- the landlord had taken it for himself. There, I found a sister of the chantry waiting for me. She told me the Maker wanted me to join the chantry." The Mother laughed softly at the memory. "I replied that I would never, that I would rather die. But I had nothing left. No home, no family. After sleeping on the hard ground, I knew it was a better place."

"And what made you change your mind about the Maker?"

Mother Giselle pointed to the open book by the feet of Andraste.

"Words have more power than anything in this life. The first try is always difficult, for my heart was locked and bolted. But the next day, and the next… soon I was drinking in the words like it was an anchor to the heavens. And the sisters were kind to me. They fed me, clothed me and listened to me as I wept every night. Over the years… I healed. And here I am, my dear. Extending to you the same hand."

The surgeon stood there, hands shaking. She felt ashamed, ashamed for wallowing in self-pity.

Mother Giselle added softly: "On that day in the Hinterlands, I did not ask you to join only because of your skills. There before me, I saw a lost spirit, wandering the darkness. I was not asking you to join the Inquisition- rather, to join the light of the Maker."

A burning emotion welled up in Ria's chest. She couldn't move, and couldn't speak. The Mother smiled and came to her, embraced her and patted her shoulder.

"This journey will be dark for you. The path of war always lies on the bones of the dead. But remember the Maker, and He will be your guide."

She gave Ria one last nod before leaving the room. The surgeon took a shuddering breath, thinking back to the blood on the floor and the numbness that possessed her that night. Her eyes drifted to the leather bound book on the floor, open to the page of Trials 1:

 _In the long hours of the night  
When hope has abandoned me,  
I will see the stars and know  
Your Light remains._

 _I have heard the sound_  
 _A song in the stillness,_  
 _The echo of Your voice,_  
 _Calling creation to wake from its slumber._


	7. Chapter 5: If You Need Company

**CHAPTER 5**

"May I join you?"

Ria looked up from the book she was reading. The red haired woman stood there, waiting.

Nodding, the surgeon gestured for her to sit next to her on the bench. She stared at the other woman, wondering. Seeking peace and quiet, she had come to the attic room, a private place that sisters came for worship.

 _Was she looking for me?_

She sat down, fixing her eyes on the statue of Andraste before them.

"I just wanted to apologize for the other day. Seeing you tend to the patients- _care_ for them, the way you talk to my friends, the things you say... I'm ashamed to have suspected you."

 _That was… nice._

"Well I… thank you. It must not have been easy to say this to me," Ria replied with a wry smile.

Leliana glanced at her. "No. It wasn't. But I can see the kindness in you- a fool would see it."

"Good to know I'm not on your bad list."

"I had some cause to suspect you, however," Leliana said with a slight smile. "You were so serious and secretive. Very intent on your work. I've seen assassins who look more carefree than you are."

Ria grinned crookedly. "I hope that's a compliment." She shrugged, looking at the statue. "My work does that to you. After seeing so many deaths, seeing so much pain in peoples' lives, you start losing expression."

Leliana didn't reply but watched her intently.

She continued. "And it doesn't help it when you know your mistakes could bring a great cost. I was always looking behind me. It isn't like here in Thedas- people are forgiving, undemanding."

The spymaster nodded. "The healers here are not monitored. It is accepted that they do the best they can, and the rest is up to the Maker. You come from a difficult place."

"Maybe. But nowhere near as dangerous as Thedas. This world is full of monsters and war," said Ria, shaking her head. "There _are_ tyrants, wars and massacres in my world but this is a different level altogether."

A wry smile twisted Leliana's lips. "Yes. I sometimes wonder about it myself: how so many things can happen here in such short a time. I feel like the Blight was only yesterday…and now…" the smile slipped off.

"And now we're waging war," Ria finished the sentence for her, frowning at the sudden faltering.

The woman's soft hair fell about her face as she looked down.

"I cannot fail. I cannot… not this time," the spymaster continued, shaking her head. There was a steely determination on her face. "Justinia gave her life for us, and I would see it honoured."

The surgeon studied her face for a while, reading the emotions the woman was fighting down. "You must have cared a lot about her."

"I did," said Leliana, taking in a deep breath. "She was a dear friend of mine, like a mother. She took me in to join the chantry... in darker times when I nearly lost my life."

Ria remembered that story well enough. "Then her passing must have been a blow to you."

"Yes," said Leliana, cold anger suddenly contorting her features. "The Maker has... taken away those most dear to me. So many over so many years. And I can no longer ignore it- He demands it all. Our lives, our _deaths,_ " she spat vehemently.

Ria sat there in silence, regarding her. This woman… so much anger, hatred and _hurt_.

 _Is this why she has that protective wall around her all the time?_

She nearly snorted. The same went for herself only a few months ago. Now… with the growing friendships and the conversations with Mother Giselle, she felt herself yielding.

"And Justinia," the spymaster continued. "She gave him _everything_ she had, _everything_!"

At this point, Leliana was no longer talking to Ria but herself, her cold gaze far away.

"And he let her die!" she continued, shaking her head. "If the Maker doesn't intervene to save the best of his servants, what good is he?"

Ria stayed silent for a minute, considering those bitter words. The conversation had taken an unexpected turn. She was treading on thin ice here, and her reply would either drive them apart or offer some measure of comfort.

"Whatever his reasons…" she took a deep breath. "He wouldn't want you to mourn them. _Justinia_ wouldn't want you to mourn her. She would want you to move on, find peace for yourself."

"And how would _you_ know what she wanted?" Leliana hissed.

Ria flinched at the sudden hostility. Those eyes… it was like a raging blizzard in those irises. But then she saw herself in them- years ago when everything fell apart. When everything was against her and she screamed at the world.

"I know, because…" she started, thinking back to the Mother's story. "I think I know the heart of a mother. What parent would want their child to carry the weight of the world? Death is a part of life. It can be cruel, yes. But if you can't see the beauty in death, think of the lives that will remain. Think of the children that will live. We need heroes in order to shape this world and inspire hope, to work for a future. Justinia did that. She gave her life for others, and that's the noblest act anyone can do. I think she would have been happy. Even in death, she will be honoured."

The woman stared at her. "So many have lost hope- are _despairing_ because of what happened. Where is the honour in that? She will fade from memory as the Divine who perished."

" _You_ can remember her. The _Sisters_ will remember her. Who she was, what she stood for. And spread word that her death was not in vain. That her life was given freely for everyone."

Leliana turned her gaze to the floor, shoulders slack.

"All is not lost. We have the Inquisition, we _will_ fight to honour the Divine's sacrifice."

Ria continued, her eyes on the book open at the statue's feet. She bit her lip. "You know… I've never been a believer in the Maker. But I've been reading some of the passages in the Chant of Light." She stood up to get the book, handing it to Leliana.

 _My Creator, judge me whole:  
Find me well within Your grace  
Touch me with fire that I be cleansed_

It was a passage she had read only yesterday, curious to know more about the religion. "Maybe this is why we need the Maker," she said, for herself as much as for Leliana. "No one is good. I found that out long ago... we're only human, after all. Or elves, or Qunari… well, you get the point. I've been thinking: what better way to die than knowing that I'm in the grace of a God, knowing that I can die without worry?"

Ria turned back to Leliana. "I think it's a gift- a way to overcome the rift demons have made. Envy, pride, hate… but I don't think that defines us. I've heard of your faith, Sister. You were an anchor in dark times and carried the Warden through the Blight… don't lose hope. Be the strength of the Inquisition."

The spymaster, sitting on the bench, seemed so vulnerable and lost that Ria felt a surge of compassion. She hadn't planned on talking about religion, especially since she didn't know where she herself stood in such matters.

Maybe this was why she was here. Maybe she was here to redeem herself for all the filth inside her.

And if Leliana was crumbling, Ria would do all she could do to save her. At least in this, she wouldn't fail.

Ria considered the golden symbol of Andraste around her neck that Mother Giselle had given her. But it seemed someone else would have better use of it. She hesitated before leaving it in the woman's lap and left the room.

The memory of her father before his operation lingered in her mind as she walked out. The day she saw the blood pooling in his abdomen and throat…

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Leliana spent the next few days in a daze, her mind echoing the words Ria had spoken.

" _You can remember her… And spread word that her death was not in vain. That her life was given freely for everyone."_

" _Isn't this why we need the Maker?"_

She strode across the snow, not even noticing the man nearly bumping into her.

"S-sorry, m'lady!" he stammered before hurrying away.

" _What parent would want their child to carry the weight of the world?... Justinia would want you to move on, find peace for yourself."_

She looked down at the long parchment, not really seeing the letters.

" _You carried the Warden through the Blight… don't lose hope. Be the strength of Inquisition."_

The spymaster stopped at the chantry door, making no move to open it. She fingered the symbol hanging from a chain around her neck.

 _Kallian…_

No. Ria was not that elf. The elf who always made her smile, the one who protected her, the one who always reached out to embrace her. She couldn't be…

"Leliana?"

The spymaster looked up to see her friend staring at her with concern.

"Yes, Josie?"

"Aren't you… going in?"

Leliana turned her eyes to the door, as if seeing it for the first time.

"I… I am."

She could still feel Josephine's eyes on her as she entered. The advisor scribbled some final notes on parchment before snapping the book shut.

"Come," she said, taking Leliana's wrist before she could protest. She pulled her friend to her office.

The Orlesian sighed.

"Josie, I'm fine."

"Then where has your brain been for the last few days? Sending the wrong raven out, forgetting the name of your agent, walking into doors, eating your lamb with a spoon. That's not like you, Leliana."

"What's wrong with eating lamb with a spoon?"

"…"

"Alright. I'll tell you, but only because it's you. And I know you'll keep asking me questions."

Josie laced her long fingers together and braced her elbows on her desk, waiting patiently.

Leliana took a deep breath, and then poured out everything to her dearest friend.

By the end of it, the candle wax had shrunk down to a small stump. And Josephine was embracing her friend tightly.

"My dear girl! Why did you not tell me this? I had a feeling something was eating at you, but you always said you were fine."

"I'm sorry, Josie. There was just… a lot of work to do, and I felt like I would crack if I thought about it."

"I _thought_ you weren't entirely honest about… about Kallian. You still love her, don't you?"

"I can never forget her."

"And _she_ reminds you of her."

Leliana stood up and started pacing the room. "I can't explain it. The mannerisms, the air of confidence, the _looks_." She brought her hands to her temples. "She looks so much like her. And her words… they're exactly what Kallian would say."

"I can't believe what I'm hearing… Ria must have been very good at consoling you."

The spymaster shook her head. "Not just good. I feel lighter, like a weight is off my shoulders. She's never met Justinia and I don't think she knows the Maker. But what she says… feels right."

Josephine gave her a fond smile. "Then I am very glad she is with us, for your sake."

"But who is she?" said Leliana suddenly, eyes bright. "She came out of nowhere, with healing skills we desperately needed, looking like Kallian's twin sister. Do you think she was sent by the Maker?"

Josephine looked uncomfortable. "Perhaps… but in any case," she said, taking hold of her friend's hands. "I want you to be happy, Leliana. And I believe she is good for you."

The spymaster blushed. "I… I don't think we are at such a level yet…"

Josie laughed. "You know, I never said anything about _that._ I just meant she is a good influence. But who knows, we may see something blossoming, no?"

Leliana made a noise of exasperation, trying to hide her embarrassment.

"Alright, I'll leave you be," smiled Josephine. "Come on, to work then. Or…" she said teasingly. "You could spend some time with your new object of interest. She's going with them to close the Breach tomorrow."

"She's going with them?" asked Leliana, whirling around.

"You can ask her if you like."

"I will… take your word for it."

"Of course."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The paint brush stopped at the bottom of the red hair before a quiet knock sounded at the door.

Hurriedly, Ria tidied everything up and moved the canvas behind the wardrobe.

"Er… coming!"

She tucked the box of brushes and paints in the last drawer and rushed to the door… to reveal Leliana.

"Sister Nightingale," she said in surprise. After the DMC they had a few days ago, Ria had been swamped with patients so this was the first time they were meeting after that.

"Please," the spymaster said, holding up a gloved hand. "Just Leliana will be fine."

Ria relaxed a little. The Orlesian's voice sounded much less hostile than before.

"Well, then… Leliana. What can I do for you?"

Her blue eyes flicked to the center of the room, where Ria had placed a book on her desk.

"Am I interrupting something?"

"No…"

"Then would you… take a walk with me?"

Was it just her, or did Leliana seem shy when she said that?

"Of course… Leliana."

The spymaster led her out to the courtyard, where the torches were now burning in the night. She took Ria to the top of a lookout point. For a few minutes, they stood side by side, gazing out at the moonlight rimmed mountains. Stars were out, cut diamonds in the velvet sky.

The spymaster sighed. "The night was always peaceful to me," said Leliana suddenly.

Ria glanced at her. This sounded a bit familiar…

"And then, when someone close to me died…" she seemed to choke on her words. Ria held her breath, concerned. "A part of me died that night. And the darkness of the world frightened me."

 _Does she mean the Warden? Or Justinia?_

"But when you spoke to me three days ago, I began looking at the night sky again."

Ria regarded the woman softly.

"I'm glad to hear that."

Leliana faced her, but the hood cast a shadow so that Ria couldn't see her features.

"I wanted to thank you, for doing that for me. I needed those words, more than you'll ever know."

Ria didn't really know what to say. She hadn't really expected such gratitude.

She shook her head. "The Inquisition needs you, the _real_ you. I'm sure the Divine saw it in her Left Hand."

Ria thought she saw a smile.

"You are too kind."

It was a start.

The surgeon hesitated before smiling back. She held out a hand. "Then we are friends?"

Leliana took it. "Friends."

Even through the fabric of her gloves, the feel of her skin sent an electric shock through Ria.

"You know," she said, still trying to calm her heartbeat. "I think you should try skiing, that would loosen you up a bit."

"Ski-ing?" the Orlesian asked.

"It's a sport back in my world where you strap your feet to two long planks, carry two poles to help yourself and skid down the mountain slope."

"That sounds…" Leliana said, blinking. "So ridiculous. But it does sound like a fun thing to do."

Ria grinned. "You'll like it. I did it every chance I got."

"It sounds a bit dangerous, though."

"People do get injured sometimes, but that's why you only go for runs that you're capable of."

The spymaster studied her face. "Do you miss your world?"

A shadow passed over Ria when she thought about everything she'd left behind. "Sometimes. My mother and brother will be waiting for me."

"What about your father?"

Ria turned her face away. "I… he died a few years ago."

"I'm sorry, I should have-"

"No, it's alright," she said, taking in a deep breath. "It was a while ago."

There was a short silence before Leliana broke it.

"How was the… hospital you worked at?"

"Busy," said Ria, glad for the change in subject. "Chaotic. Not enough staff, too many things to do. I never sat down, except when I had clinics. Ward rounds, operations, chasing bloods and scans. And the boss wanted everything done quickly. It's all a bit hectic."

Though Leliana didn't understand some of the terms, she nodded. "It sounds like a lot of pressure."

"You could say that. I was a junior surgeon there."

"And you had a boss?"

"The boss is top surgeon. A few more years and I may have stepped up to the position," she said, shrugging.

"The surgeons in your world sound very powerful."

"A bit…" she started awkwardly. Ria didn't want to sound like she was bragging. "That's why we need to make sure we don't abuse that power."

"And were you… alone in these challenges?"

Ria cocked her head in question. "You mean was I the only one struggling with this?"

"No, I meant that… for a woman of your standing, you must have had family, a significant other to support you."

"Oh," said Ria, hoping Leliana wouldn't see her red face. "I had family. A few flings. But I never had a proper relationship. I guess I never really had time."

 _Until now._

Leliana nodded. "That is understandable." She gave a soft laugh. "Someone like Cullen could use time away from work too."

Ria laughed but studied the woman's face. _What was_ that _question about? Is she… interested?_

Then she shook her head. _Probably not._

"A bit of romance would soften him up." The surgeon snorted. "He would be with someone already if he didn't spend so much time staring at women's breasts instead of talking to them."

The comment was made without thinking, and Ria suddenly realized what she said.

"Wait… sorry that was-"

Leliana burst out laughing. She covered her mouth with a modest hand. "Oh, that was cruelly accurate of what he does."

The torchlight revealed the woman's face lit up by mirth. Ria stared at the change in her face… it was like an angel stood before her.

 _Snap out of it._

"I... well, I couldn't help but notice. Especially when we go for drinks at the tavern." She chuckled when she remembered. "I think he's secretly a pervert."

The spymaster gave her a sideways glance.

"And is this interest in the Commander purely observational or…?"

The surgeon blinked at the insinuation. Then she laughed, shaking her head. " _Cullen_? No. He's a good trainer, is all. Nothing between us."

"Few turn down the Commander's charm… or was it the breasts that gained your attention?"

At this, Ria flushed deep red. "Hey, I'm not a pervert." She cleared her throat. "I've been brought up in a family that believes in propriety."

Leliana smirked. "You may have, but that doesn't stop one from being tempted," she said, a teasing glint in her eyes.

"… Alright, sometimes. But I'd rather save that for someone I really care about."

At that comment, the spymaster regarded her with serious eyes.

"Anyway," Ria continued, uncomfortable. "As a spymaster, _you_ must be busy. Anything you do in your spare time?"

The Orlesian looked away to gaze at the sky again. "I'm afraid with my missions and jobs, there is little time I have to myself. In rare moments like these, I take a walk."

Ria shrugged. "Nothing wrong with that. I'll join you if you need company."

Leliana smiled. "That would be nice." Then her smile turned sly. "I suppose it wouldn't do any harm to hear more about your secret… observations."

The surgeon rolled her eyes. Leliana laughed at the expression. After a moment, Ria joined her in the joke, trying to ignore the sight of the glowing green tear in the sky. On this peaceful night, hearing this woman's laughter… she could forget about the mission tomorrow.


	8. Chapter 6: Face of the Enemy

**CHAPTER 6: Face of the Enemy**

The horn that sounded made Ria bolt out of bed. At the same time, a knock sounded at the door. Both noises made her jump. Rubbing her eyes, she went over to open it and was embarrassed to see Leliana. Ria stood there, wearing a thin shirt without a breast binder. The spymaster didn't seem to care as she stepped in.

"Leliana?"

"Come, I will help you with the armour."

"Wait, I just need to change into…"

Leliana turned her back.

Ria pulled on some fresh pants, boots and put on the breast binder. Then she slipped into a better shirt.

"Done. But… could I ask why…?"

"It is your first mission, no? I would be a poor friend if I wasn't here for this."

The surgeon blinked. "Thank you," she said sincerely.

Leliana gave her a rare smile and helped her put on her breastplate, adjusting the straps. The bracers, the greaves, the collar… with every touch, Ria felt herself stiffen as her skin burned like fire. She felt stupid staring at her as the woman came to the front.

The spymaster examined her handiwork before taking the helmet and gently nestling it on Ria's head. She even brushed away the stray hair in her eyes, the contact numbing her.

 _By the Maker…_

"Thank you," she managed to say.

"You're welcome," Leliana said.

They both stood staring at each other for a time. Those blue eyes softened and she pulled something from her belt, handing it to the surgeon.

"Wear this for me," said the spymaster.

Ria looked down at the blade and saw its faint markings: Mercy.

"The silver sword of Mercy?" she asked, staring at Leliana.

 _I thought this was supposed to be an amulet…_

"It was a gift from someone who was… close to me. I pray it will bring you victory over your enemies. May the Maker guide your hand."

 _The one who_ was _close to her._

"How can I accept this? It must be valuable to you."

"Take it. Take it and return it to me."

 _You expect me to live._

The surgeon regarded her seriously for a moment. "Then I will return," she finally said, nodding.

Leliana smiled a small smile and the two walked out to meet the others, already packed and ready to go.

"What took you so long, surgeon?" said Varric, and Ria felt her face warm up even in the cold outside.

Vivienne nudged him with her staff. "Perhaps she needed some assistance. It _is_ her first mission, after all."

"What? Ohhh, right. What am I saying? Forget I said anything."

"Then let us move forward," said Cassandra firmly, the meaning shooting over her head. "We have already lost much time."

Trevelyan greeted Ria as she joined them. As the group of heroes walked out of Haven with the mages to the sound of cheers, the only thought on Ria's mind was Leliana.

Varric slapped her on the shoulder. "Worried?"

Ria smiled nervously. "Yeah… a bit."

"No need to be. We've got your back. If it's too much for you, we'll take over."

The surgeon raised an eyebrow. "I'd be a pretty bad team member if I let you."

"My dear, it is better that you admit your inexperience than charge into battle and die," said the mage.

Ria laughed. "Alright. I see your point."

She looked back one last time to see the hooded form of the spymaster, flaming hair flickering in the icy wind.

 _I will return._

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The blade sank into the putrid flesh of the creature and, for the hundredth time, gore splattered onto her face.

"Urgh…" she said, her face contorting at the stench.

Even as a surgeon, things hadn't been this disgusting.

Ria glared at the long, spindly legs, the dagger teeth and glassy eyes. The monster was so grotesque- nothing like how Lesser Terrors looked in the game.

 _Give me a cavitating abscess any day._

"Nice work!" called out Varric, hefting Bianca onto his shoulder.

"Yes, that was excellent performance," said Cassandra approvingly, wiping the gore off her own face.

"A couple more kills and you'll be beating Iron Bull," said Varric, amused.

The huge Qunari laughed. "Not yet, little elf. I've killed a hundred and ten."

"A hundred and two? Three? I've lost count."

Iron Bull frowned. "You're cheating, aren't you?"

"I would if I could," Ria panted. "Just how many of these things are there?"

"Hold on to your sword, kiddo," said Varric. "We aren't done yet."

"Nearly, I should think," said Vivienne. "I can see the Breach getting closer."

"Good," said Ria, leaning on the sword. "I just hope we don't see more Despair demons."

"We… probably will," said the Herald, chuckling as they all continued forward.

"Brilliant."

True to his word, they encountered more demons up ahead and slashed through the lot. It had been long since Ria actually _thought_. When she was fighting, she relied on instincts- how her hands remembered the different techniques from training. Cassandra or Trevelyan pulled the Despair demons toward them with magical chains, hacked at them. Next, Vivienne and Solas hurled fire or ice bolts at the enemies and Varric pinned them with his crossbow. Iron Bull finished it off with a charge.

As for Ria, she dodged the monsters and manoeuvred around them to kill them when they were distracted.

The rest of the silent mages behind them shielded them with wards.

After wiping their weapons, they approached the roaring emerald light funnelling up into the sky. Giant pillars of stone surrounded them, pulsing with a green glow permeating the cracks. The Herald looked down at his left hand, which was crackling with energy.

After taking a brief look at the Breach, Solas and Cassandra turned to the row of mages.

"Mages!" shouted Cassandra.

"Focus past the Herald! Let his will draw from you!" said Solas urgently.

The mages obeyed, and Ria stood there watching as the Herald pushed through. A mage gave a shout and brought his staff down on the ground. The rest of them followed suit.

Trevelyan thrust his hand up and a burst of green energy arced through the air. It struck the crystalline structure, glowing brighter with each second. His brows were knit together in concentration to maintain it. And then…

It was done.

A blinding light erupted and a massive force knocked them over. Ria felt her body flying in the air, suspended… then crashed to the rocks. She cursed as she felt fresh bruises, but no head injury. The Seeker got up quickly, pushing past the mages to see Trevelyan.

Maxwell was kneeling, a little dazed but alive.

"You did it," said Cassandra with awe.

"That's it?" asked Ria, staring at the space the Breach had been just minutes before.

Iron Bull slapped her on the back. "That's it, Surgeon!" he laughed.

Everyone cheered, relieved that it was finally done. Solas gave an approving nod, while the others straightened up to join in the congratulations.

The Breach was closed.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Ria walked through the doors of Haven, her legs feeling like lead. She had been so tired after the fighting and groaned when they had to climb all the way back down.

But when she heard the cheering, the ecstatic looks on people's faces… it was worth it. Dazed, she walked the path through the crowd. There were smiling faces, arms waving for her attention, and there was Cullen and Josephine waiting for them. Both were beaming in approval.

But there was one face she was looking for.

 _There._

Like a sentinel in the night, Leliana stood straight and beautiful. For the first time, her hood was down, leaving her red hair fluttering in the wind like a symbol of favour.

The party reached Cullen and Josephine, who welcomed them. And when Josephine saw her, she winked. The spymaster was coming down the steps. Even through tired eyes, Ria saw the change in Leliana. Her eyes… they were bright. Brighter than she'd ever seen them.

After a short speech from Cullen, everyone was clambering to get a table and pour ale. There was music, dancing and raucous laughing as people relieved the stress of war.

Ria searched for her in the crowd, but she didn't have to look far.

The woman was similarly trying to find her, and when their eyes met, Ria knew this was fate. She drew the sword from its scabbard and walked slowly to her.

Leliana came forward to meet her in the middle. Ria held the weapon out to her.

"I believe this is yours, my lady."

Leliana shook her head, surprising Ria by laughing. It was a wonderful sound, clear like the peal of bells.

"Keep it," she said, placing a cool hand on hers. "That promise was for your sake, so you would return alive. I never meant to take it back."

"Oh. Are you sure?" said Ria dubiously. _Didn't the Warden give this to you?_

The question remained unsaid.

"I want you to have it. Now come, we must celebrate this victory," said the spymaster, a wide smile on her lips. She took Ria's hand and pulled her to one of the tables where Vivienne was having a light drink with Josephine.

"A good choice, Surgeon Ria," said the mage, rolling her eyes in Varric's direction. Ria saw that the dwarf was pouring himself another tankard of ale, slightly tipsy already.

Josephine's sharp eyes had already seen her hands in Leliana's.

"Yes. A _very_ good choice, Surgeon."

She sat down and sighed as the smell of hot food reached her. "I could really do with some dinner."

Leliana waved a servant over, who came back a moment later with a dish piled with baked potatoes, greens and steak covered in rich gravy and some other sauce.

Her eyes widened. "Are you expecting me to eat all of that?"

The spymaster laughed again. That was the second time she laughed today.

"No, silly. We will share."

"Ah…"

As the four of them ate, talked and drank, surrounded by the celebratory atmosphere and laughter, Ria felt so… at home. Vivienne and Josephine swapping gossip, Leliana laughing and smiling… this was where she belonged. She looked at the Orlesian. The years had matured her sweet face to a delicate, noble beauty. But Ria thought she could see the old Leliana shining through.

After some time, Vivienne was taken away for a dance and Josephine made an excuse to leave them, giving Ria a quick wink before going.

"So…"

A jolt of shock made her hand jump as Leliana placed a hand on her own.

 _Shit, why does she keep doing this to me?_

"It is good to see you returned, Ria."

As those eyes held hers, Ria found herself unable to look away- just like the first day they met. And this time… the ice chips in her irises, the hollow blizzard in their depths were gone. It was a warm summer's day in those rings of blue.

"I'm happy to be alive too," she said, grinning to cover up how nervous she was.

 _Those lips, those eyes, that skin… wow._

If Leliana had suddenly revealed herself to be a mage, Ria wouldn't have been surprised. Her magic was weaving electric spells of attraction right now.

She swallowed heavily.

That small detail wouldn't have gone unnoticed by the former bard. A coy smile curved the woman's lips.

"Have I ever told you…"

"Told me what?" whispered Ria.

"That you remind me of someone from long ago?"

Her eyes held so much warmth now, a softness turning her smile wistful.

Those red lips were coming closer, the scent of Andraste's Grace making Ria giddy and slow.

Suddenly, alarm bells sounded.

"Forces approaching! To arms!" yelled Cullen.

"Enemies to the east!"

Screams pierced the air as the festivities were abandoned. Ria's eyes gained sharp focus again, and Leliana stood up. The two exchanged glances.

 _What the-? I don't remember this happening in the game… Well, I did play this a year ago but…_

Without further delay, Ria drew her sword and took up her shield while Leliana sprinted across the grounds. The woman took one brief moment to give her a glance and disappeared. She recognized what was in her eyes: fear.

Everything was chaotic at Haven, people screaming and running around, drunken men stumbling about. Cullen was bellowing at men to get into position and Ria saw the Herald and his group rushing for the gates. She pushed past people to find Mother Giselle. The Mother was standing by the chantry.

"Ria!"

"Mother Giselle, we must get you to safety!"

Even while saying this, she glanced back. The Inner Circle was gathering, rushing for the gates.

The Mother shook her head. "I will be safe." She gestured at the soldier next to her. "Peter will escort me to the chantry. Go to the others, they will need your help."

"Yes, I will protect her, Surgeon Ria," the soldier reassured her.

Ria hesitated, torn between her duties. The chantry wasn't far away, and the army wasn't here yet. She nodded.

"Then the Maker protect you both!" she said, and sprinted as fast as she could, slinging the bag of medical tools over her shoulder. When she reached the gates, the Commander was standing there, looking grave.

"Cullen?" asked Cassandra.

"One watchguard reporting said there's a massive force, the bulk over the mountain."

"Under what banner?" demanded Josephine.

"None," said Cullen emotionlessly.

" _None?_ " said Josie, bewildered.

Ria joined Trevelyan in staring at the doors as someone banged on it. Everyone jumped in surprise.

"If someone could open this, I'd appreciate it!"

 _Dorian?_

A soldier at the doors pushed them open as Trevelyan ran forward. Several bodies of Venatori were scattered around a lone figure. Dorian Pavus was kneeling on the ground, supporting himself with his staff. They all rushed to his side.

"I'm here to warn you," said the mage, trying to be upbeat about it. "But fashionably late, I'm afraid."

Cullen held him as the man tipped sideways. He waved him away. "A mite exhausted, don't mind me. Ah, there you are," he said as Trevelyan appeared.

"I came to tell you what happened to the mages at Redcliffe. But you're not going to like it: they are under the command of the Venatori, in service to something called the Elder One."

Ria had a very bad feeling about this.

Dorian pointed to a woman standing on a cliff in the distance. Behind her, a tall, skeletal man emerged. "That's Calpernia- she commands the Venatori. And that- the Elder One."

Ria felt an unpleasant shudder shake her. In the game, she had laughed at Corypheus. And now, in real life, the sight of him chilled her bones.

"They were already marching to Haven. I risked my life to get here first."

Maxwell scowled. "Cullen, give me a plan. Anything."

Cullen sighed. "Haven is no fortress. If we are to withstand this monster, we must control the battle. Get out there and hit that force. Use everything you can."

He slid his sword out of its sheath and turned to the army. "Soldiers, gather the villagers! Fortify and watch for advanced forces! Inquisition, with the Herald!" Cullen stabbed in the direction of Corypheus. "For your lives! For all of us!"

"Get to the trebuchet!"

Ria's heart felt like it was about to explode out of her chest, it was beating so hard.

She saw the team slay dozens of armoured men and move forward. It was easy kill, but she felt a big fight coming on.

With the others, she hacked and slashed, mainly banging her shield in the Venatori's faces and stabbing their guts. It helped that she knew where all the vital arteries were- one small slash and they were goners. Cassandra, Ria, Blackwall and Iron Bull took on the bulk of the enemies while the Inquisitor focussed on turning the wheels on the Trebuchet.

There was a supply cache nearby so she stocked up on some medicine while Vivienne, Varric and Dorian covered her.

Venatori rushed in to stop them; zealots, marksmen and mages. The majority weren't hard to kill but the arrows were distracting. More than once, Ria had to cauterize the wounds and hand out vasopressors, switching between tending them and fighting enemies.

They encountered several more waves of Venatori and the Herald turned the whole wheel. The machine hurled a flaming projectile at the mountain side. It struck with a huge crash, and a cloud of snow hurtled down to the Venatori.

"Yes!" hooted Varric.

Soldiers cheered, pumping fists in the air. But it wasn't over. There was a flash of red light, and a nearby trebuchet splintered into pieces. Cold dread passed through her as she watched the dragon. It flew overhead to the chantry.

Together, the party ran back to the gates, where Cullen was urging them all to hurry. They finally entered, and Cullen slammed the doors shut. The Commander then stomped up the steps in frustration.

"We need everyone back to the chantry. It's the only building that might hold against that… _beast_! At this point, just make them _work_ for it," he growled before going.

They sprinted for the chantry. A soldier opened it, to reveal High Chancellor Roderick, who was stumbling.

"Move, quickly! The chantry is your shelter!" he said through gritted teeth as soldiers came in.

Dorian caught him before he fell.

"A brave man- he stood against a Venatori," said the mage gravely.

"Briefly," said Roderick weakly. "I am no Templar."

"Herald," called Cullen, running toward them. Leliana accompanied him, her shoulders relaxing when she saw Ria.

"Our position is not good," continued the Commander. "That dragon stole back any time you might have earned us. There has been no communication, no demands. Only advance after advance."

Dorian knelt beside the Chancellor. "And there was no bargaining with the mages either. This Elder One takes what it wants. From what I gathered in Redcliffe, it marched all of this way to take your Herald."

Maxwell frowned and Cassandra looked alarmed. "Any idea why he wants me?" he asked.

"Besides wanting the Templars, I have no idea what might incur this much wrath… and such a promising start with the landslide." Dorian laughed. "If only trebuchets remained an option."

"They are," said Cullen. "If we turn the last of them to the mountains above us."

Trevelyan shook his head. "We're overrun. To hit the enemy, we'd bury Haven."

"This is not about survival, now," said the Commander. "The only choice left is how spitefully we end this."

"Well…" said Dorian. "This is not acceptable. I didn't race here only to have you drop rocks on my head."

"Should we submit, then? Let him kill us?" asked Cullen angrily.

"Dying," said the mage firmly. "Is typically a last resort, not first. For a Templar, you think like a _bloodmage_."

A voice behind them strained to be heard. "There is a path… you wouldn't know it unless you made the summer pilgrimage as I have. The people _can_ escape."

Despite her loathing for this man, Ria turned to hear what he had to say.

"Andraste must have shown me, so I could _tell_ you…"

The Herald frowned. "What are you on about, Roderick?"

"It was whim that I walked the path. I did not mean to start, it was overgrown. And now… with so many in the conclave dead, to be the only one who remembers… I don't know, if this simple memory can save us. This could be more than mere accident. _You_ could be more."

Everyone looked at him strangely.

"What about it, Cullen? Would it work?" asked the Herald, still not understanding the chancellor.

"Possibly. If he shows us the path."

He whirled around and instructed everyone to follow the Chancellor, with Dorian supporting him.

"The soldiers will load the trebuchets- keep the Elder One's attention above the treeline."

Maxwell nodded and the party turned to go. Before Ria went through the doors, a hand grabbed her wrist. She looked back to see the spymaster. Leliana pressed her lips to her cheek.

"The Maker be with you," she whispered, and let go.

Ria stood there like a fool, staring… until Varric called her and she ran out the doors. Even as she was speeding toward death and danger, a grin spread on her face.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The last wheel was turned, and they sighed in relief.

Ria reached into her bag for the poultices and handed out pain killers to everyone. They drained the medicine, making faces at the taste.

"I think these could taste a little better," said Varric. "No offense," he added with a grin.

Ria rolled her eyes. "They do their job, that's what matters. Now use the salve before we get injured again," slathering the substance on some of her own wounds.

They did, and the Herald turned the wheel completely.

"Here we go," he said before aiming the trebuchet.

But before he could fire, there was a blood-curdling roar and a force that rocked them off their feet. Ria got up shakily, the sounds around her muffled. She tried to shake off the headache and regain focus. Around her, the others were also getting up, confused. A yard away, she saw the Herald. And she also saw a tall man with red lyrium permanently embedded in his face and head. His armour looked like someone had torn his ribcage open and his arms were thin as bone.

"Shit, it's Corypheus," she said in fear.

Vivienne, the closest to her, glanced back. "You know the name?"

"I'll tell you later," Ria said.

"Pretender," rumbled Corypheus. "You toy with forces beyond your ken. No more."

Maxwell got up shakily. "Whatever you are… I'm not afraid!"

The Elder One didn't laugh, didn't even blink. "Words mortals often hurl at the darkness. They were once mine. All lies. Know me. Know what you have pretended to be."

As in the game, the Elder One's voice was so quiet she could hardly hear the rest but she caught one line: "Beg that I succeed, for I have seen the throne of the gods… and it was empty."

Corypheus took a hold of Trevelyan and hurled him at the Trebuchet. Maxwell stood up again and inched back toward the catapult. Ria could see what he was doing. Thankfully, neither the dragon nor Corypheus were interested in killing Ria or her companions.

… _if he's going to make an avalanche, then…_

"Run!" she yelled to the others. They looked at her but didn't question it. Varric, Iron Bull, Blackwall, Vivienne and Dorian followed her as she sprinted away as far as possible.

"Wait! What about Trevelyan?" asked Cassandra desperately.

"He'll survive! Trust me!" she called back.

There was a huge crash as the projectile found its mark and a rumble as the avalanche started travelling in their direction.

"Keep going!"

They were nearly at the edge of Haven when Ria felt a force from behind and everything turning white... and then black.

 _We're going to make it, right?_ she thought before losing consciousness.


	9. Chapter 7: The Dawn Will Come

**CHAPTER 7: The Dawn Will Come**

The searing cold woke her up. It was searing because the shirt she was wearing was torn open in both arms, and there was a blizzard.

When Ria opened her eyes, she panicked because everything was black. But then snow whizzed by in the howling wind. She tried to get up, but her whole body felt swollen and bruised. After lying there for a few minutes, she forced herself up.

 _The sword…_

Ria felt around her belt and sighed in relief. It was still there. Unfortunately, the shield, bow and medical supplies were gone, but that was minor. What mattered was that she was alive. But where were the others?

She scanned the area for any sign of life. Clothing sticking out, weapons, anything. But there was nothing.

"Varric! Cassandra!"

Her voice was lost in the wind, cracking at the effort.

"Vivienne!"

No answer.

"...Iron Bull, Blackwall!"

There was no one. Or had they been buried in the snow? She cast her eyes about her but knew it would take days to get through this thick layer. They had to be alive, they _had_ to be. In the game, the heroes survived… right?

So far, she had seen the events happen like in the game. But she was in a real world, a real place. Who knew if fate suddenly decided to change things? And the assassin… that wasn't supposed to happen.

And Leliana. Leliana had to be alive too.

 _I have to believe it._

Everything was so real that it was harder to expect things to happen as it did in the game. She certainly hadn't expected to wake up in the middle of nowhere. Ria jammed her freezing hands into each armpit and looked about her. No trees, no landmarks. Just snow.

Down the mountain, she saw nothing but blackness. Up front, she could see the top of the mountain looming over her like a giant. The avalanche must have tossed her out of Haven.

 _Haven…_

Guilt twisted in her as she thought of the battle. How hundreds had died, screaming after celebrating just hours before.

 _I could have warned them. I could have told them this would happen._

But she hadn't remembered. Ria shook her head. It didn't make sense- why couldn't she remember? It was like there were pieces of her memory missing.

Fear touched her: would she forget her memories of home?

Shaking the feeling off, she started forwards.

It took a long time to walk on the snow, with each boot sinking into it like stepping into a bean bag. A couple of hours- she estimated- passed as she made progress, bending into the cold wind. The stars were beginning to light up and the blizzard dying down. The problem was, she had no idea where she was going, only that she had to get away from Haven. There was nothing for her there.

In the game, she had a vague feeling the survivors gathered in the mountains somewhere, but she couldn't see any light to help her find it. If she couldn't get to them, maybe she could find another path to the Hinterlands, or some village.

"I don't know," she growled to herself.

Nevertheless, she trudged through the snow to the north west, where there was a rough slope up the mountain. She followed it, avoiding broken weapons sticking up from the ground and picking up a fallen wineskin as she went. The water drew a shiver as it ran down her throat. She continued on till the snow suddenly dipped down.

Ria froze.

There were footprints in the snow. Heart beating, she ran forward, stumbling as she did. The height of the mountain was considerable now, and she had the feeling she was close. She kept going, and followed the tracks until the slope opened onto level ground. In the distance, she saw a lone figure staggering forward.

"Herald!" she shouted, her voice hoarse.

He turned around and straightened when he saw her. Grinning like an idiot, Ria waved her arms and ran to meet him. Maxwell Trevelyan smiled, but winced as his split lips bled.

Ria handed him the wineskin, which he chugged down.

He let out a sigh of relief. "Thank you, I needed that."

"No kidding. Good to see you alive, Trevelyan."

He cocked his head. "You don't seem that surprised."

"I… I am surprised, what are you talking about," she said, elbowing him and then regretting it when he groaned. "Sorry."

"I met a few darkspawn on the way here. I think I broke my ribs."

"No wonder. Here, let me see." She examined his left ribs- about the 6th and 7th ribs. "Breathe in for me."

No paradoxical indrawing.

"How long ago was this?"

"A day, two days ago? I don't know."

"Well, I'm not too worried then. If it was a flail chest and punctured your lungs, you'd be dead."

"… Good to know."

"I think you're stable for now. Where were you heading for?"

"Don't laugh, but I don't know."

Ria smiled. "I was wandering about too. Had no idea what I was doing."

Maxwell smiled back. "At least we're alive…" then the smile dropped off, a shadow replacing it. "Everything turned so wrong. I failed everyone."

"Maxwell… you thought of that avalanche and you're still alive."

"Yes," he said looking sadly at his left hand.

"We wouldn't even have a chance if you died. Now come on, let's go find the others."

"They're alive?" he asked hopefully. Then his expression turned suspicious. "How do you know? You said you were wandering around like I was."

"Uh… let's hope they are."

"You sounded sure of it."

"Look, I'll explain later. First, we need to get you to safety."

He nodded reluctantly and she supported him as he walked, bent over in pain.

They walked for a long time, but thankfully the blizzard was gone and there was just a light wind. Even so, Ria shivered and her vision started blurring.

 _I must be bleeding somewhere_ , she thought hazily. It wasn't just sleep or weariness. She felt faint and her heart race faster. _Oh great, just hold on a bit longer._

As she dragged the Herald along, they finally spotted a dim light in the distance.

"There, up the slope…" breathed Trevelyan, his own eyes drooping.

Ria growled and grit her teeth as she pulled him up the slope. They reached the top and they… well, _she_ looked down at the fire crackling below in the distance. Relief washed over her as she saw the tents and flag of the Inquisition.

"We made it," she breathed.

Trevelyan fell to his knees.

"There they are! It's the Herald!" cried a voice from below.

"He's alive!"

Ria saw a bunch of people rushing up to them and gave a weak laugh before she blacked out.

 _Thank God._

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The fire crackled and there was a buzz in her ears.

There was a weight on her forehead, and she raised a hand to feel her fingers close around a cool, wet cloth. She looked down, saw her breastplate gone and felt the tightness of bandages around her torso.

"You're finally awake," said a voice next to her.

The Herald sat on the edge of his makeshift bed, smiling at her.

"Yes…" she said, not quite believing she was there. On a bed and not trekking the mountain. "We made it."

He nodded. "Thank you for saving me up there. I probably would have passed out and no one would have found me."

"Maybe. They could have sent out a search party."

"Apparently my spleen was bleeding and you brought me here just in time."

Ria wanted to kick herself. "Damn… I forgot about that."

Maxwell chuckled. "You were tired. Besides, there were mages to heal me." He waved a hand at the group by the fire. "They've been at it for hours."

Ria followed his gaze to see Cassandra, Cullen, Josephine and Leliana arguing.

"Well. A lot happened in Haven," she said, sighing.

"Indeed. And I am happy to see you safely returned," said a familiar voice.

Ria cricked her neck as she turned to the person approaching. "Mother Giselle!"

The Mother's warm face came into view. "My child, I was so worried about you."

"I don't die easily, revered Mother," she said, trying to smile.

"Well I am glad the Maker has protected you. When the others returned and you did not…"

"But here I am, as the Maker willed it."

The woman smiled, nodding. "As the Maker willed it."

"And she was carrying some extra weight with her," said the Herald.

"Yes, and I am glad to see the both of you alive. For the moment, rest, and I will come back after tending to the others."

She patted the surgeon on the arm and moved away to the next tent.

When Ria looked over at the group, Cullen seemed fired up about something, to which Cassandra snapped back. Leliana, however, caught the movement at the periphery of her gaze and immediately excused herself. She walked quickly to the tent, looking like she wanted to run but aware of the many eyes present.

"You're awake!" she said, and then noticed Trevelyan. She inclined her head. "Trevelyan. You are up as well, I see."

"Yes," he said. Then he gave a weak cough and started to go. "But I think I may go find a healer to help me with this throat- it still feels a little gravelly."

Ria frowned at him suspiciously as he walked away.

Leliana sat down next to her as soon as he went. She looked at Ria, eyes brimming with concern.

"How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine. Just bruised."

"That's not what they told me," the spymaster said dubiously. "You were bleeding from very deep wounds."

 _It must have been the morphine. I didn't feel anything._

Ria gave her a crooked grin. "Don't look so worried."

And without thinking, she brushed away a strand of red hair from the woman's face. Leliana shivered at the touch, but quickly recovered. She glared at her.

"Of course I am! Do you know how worried I was? Everyone else came back unscathed, but you and the Inquisitor were nowhere to be found. Why didn't you stay with Mother Giselle? What were you thinking?"

Ria blinked. "Woa, woa. Alright, I'm sorry." She fumbled for the right words. "It just seemed like the right thing to do. Mother Giselle had someone to protect her, and the team was going to need some first aid at the trebuchet so…"

Leliana stood up, hugging herself and looked away. "I thought you died."

Ria sat there, studying her. The hunched shoulders, the barrier, the secrecy…

She left the bed to stand behind Leliana, placing a hand on the woman's right shoulder. "You've lost many."

She seemed to relax at the touch. "I have seen close friends die, yes."

"And… you have lost a lover."

It was not a question.

Leliana looked at her quickly. "You know?"

"When you talk about the Blight… about the Warden…"

The spymaster sighed. "It was many years ago. She died slaying the Archdemon." The last part was said emotionlessly, numbly.

"I'm sorry."

She shook her head. "I have to let go of her."

"You don't have to do that now," said Ria gently. "People don't just disappear from our lives. You can't _force_ yourself to let go."

Leliana looked at her, her expression unreadable. "You sound so much like her."

"I do?"

"The similarities are so great that it scares me. When I first saw you… I was so shocked."

"What do I have in common with her?"

"Aside from the fact that she was an elf? You look like her, you walk, talk and act like her."

"Um, that's… disturbing."

Ria _had_ created a Warden that looked similar to herself, but she hadn't expected the _personality_ to be like her.

A smile touched Leliana's lips. "My thoughts exactly. Although… your accent is a little different, and I often don't understand some of the words you use."

Ria laughed softly, then grew serious. "What was she like?"

"Kallian?" There was a faraway look in those eyes. "Strong, confident, and so serious, so devoted to work. But she was passionate and caring- she would never pass by someone who needed help. Oh, but she was so stubborn! She didn't like losing and we would argue for days if she disagreed."

The spymaster smiled as she thought about it… but then a weary sadness replaced it.

Ria wanted to comfort her but didn't know what to do. In the end, she just settled for drawing the woman to her, patting her arm.

"I don't know what she would say, but… I think she would have been proud of you. You've done well to come this far."

Her shoulder jumped a bit when Leliana leaned her head on it.

"Thank you," she murmured.

"Y-you're welcome."

They stayed like this for a while, and Ria tried to ignore some of the stares from people. But then she spotted the Herald making some frustrated motions. He was talking to Mother Giselle. She frowned.

"What's happening over there?"

Leliana lifted her head to look in the direction. "I'm not sure, but I think the events may be upsetting him. Considering what's happened, I'm not surprised."

Mother Giselle emerged from the tent, her expression thoughtful. Ria's eyes turned to the Inner Circle. Cullen and Josephine looked defeated, Cassandra was shaking her head, and everyone looked deathly tired. Even Varric was fingering his crossbow, a gloomy expression on his face.

And Ria had to admit… after what happened in Haven, how they'd been powerless before Corypheus… the Inquisition felt small, weak.

The fire crackled on, the embers reminding her of the red lyrium on the Elder One. Back in the comfort of her home, in front of the computer, it all felt so easy. Seeing the dying villagers- the ones she had spent months with- made her eyes water and burn. Fathers, mothers, children… gone forever, buried under the snow. How did this happen so quickly? Ria sighed, watching her breath rise in the air.

 _It's my fault…_

Would she be saying these words all her life?

 _Maker, I tried to be a better person. Started a new life. But I failed again…_

Ria hung her head, staring at the ground. The previous elation at their survival faded now, replaced by heavy defeat. Numbly, she remembered the feeling of that night… that terrible night. Shutting her eyes tight didn't help- the images were as clear as water…

" _Time out done."_

" _Everyone clear with the details?"_

 _The nurses and technician nodded, though some chatted among themselves._

 _McFenton shook his head but didn't say anything. His grey eyes glanced at Ria above the mask._

" _Ready?"_

 _Ria gave a single nod. The assistant handed her the container with the scalpel._

 _As the blade bit into the skin, the surgeon felt her hand shake. Her colleague noticed and looked up._

 _Ria shook her head and tried again, the resistance of the skin and subcutaneous tissue familiar to her. She drew a midline down the abdomen, which was dyed with chlorhexidine._

" _Bipolar," she said, stretching out a hand. She felt the familiar weight of the electrocauterizer._

 _With a hiss, the tip burned the linea alba. Steady strokes, fibrous tissue strands… and she was past the peritoneum. But as soon as she split the membrane, blood leaked out like lava._

" _Blood pressure way down! Jess, Adrenaline 100mcg IV stat!"_

" _On it!"_

 _The anaesthetists wrenched the drawers open._

" _Someone activate MTP!"_

 _The operating theatre was a blur of activity, but Ria stood there numbly. She couldn't move. She couldn't see. Everything was tilting. There was a horrible gurgling sound._

" _Ria? Ria!"_

 _McFenton's face focussed into view._

" _Ria," he said slowly. "There's no one else to repair it, you're all we have. You need to concentrate."_

 _The surgeon didn't respond. She stared down at the blood gushing from her father's mouth, the liquid flowing out from his nose._

" _Suction!"_

 _And she stood there… she stood there…_

Ria opened her eyes, throat burning in pain. She took a shuddering breath, and let it out.

 _It was in the past, it was in the past…_

She tried not to think about it, tried not to _think_. Beside her, Leliana shifted, sensing the change in her. Without a word, the woman laid a hand on her arm. And even though she didn't know what Ria was going through, the surgeon felt her whole body relax with that one touch.

 _Leliana…_

She thought back to everything she'd been through. The changes in her life since Thedas. Since Leliana. And gradually, the searing pain subsided, replaced by a dull ache in her chest. It was a small, but significant improvement. The memories faded, dominated by the feeling, the pressure of this woman's arm against hers. The scent of Andraste's Grace, and the sight of her copper hair in the light. She looked up at the stars, breathing evening out.

And suddenly, the Mother's voice rang out in the night air. A voice that was strong, but also heavy with the gravity of life:

 _Shadows fall_

 _And hope has fled_

 _Steel your heart_

 _The dawn will come_

 _The night is long_

 _And the path is dark_

 _Look to the sky_

 _For one day soon_

 _The dawn will come_

When Leliana joined in to sing, Ria felt her chest constrict. The voice was angelic, pure and clear in the mountain air:

 _The shepherd's lost_

 _And his home is far_

 _Keep to the stars_

 _The dawn will come_

Soldiers and villagers gathered together as they saw their Herald shaking his head, shoulders slumped. Voices mingled together, the song strengthening.

 _The night is long_

 _And the path is dark_

 _Look to the sky_

 _For one day soon_

 _The dawn will come_

As if by some order, all dropped to their knees before the Herald, honouring him… lending him support. Ria looked at Leliana and they too, bent their knees.

 _Bare your blade_

 _And raise it high_

 _Stand your ground_

 _The dawn will come_

 _The night is long_

 _And the path is dark_

 _Look to the sky_

 _For one day soon_

 _The dawn will come_

The revered Mother directed her gaze at the stars.

"Faith is made stronger by facing doubt. Untested, it is nothing," she said before gesturing at the survivors. "You see your Inquisition before you, Herald. And they are at your side, and will be there till the end."

As the flames danced and smoke rose up to the sky, Ria felt renewed strength flow through her. Yes, the past would be there, haunting her. But right now, she was in a new world, leading a new life. She had a new purpose.

Somehow… somehow… she would survive this. She would see it through. She would look forward to the future.

Indeed, the dawn would come.


	10. Chapter 8: More Than Friends?

**CHAPTER 8: More Than Friends?**

The next week was one of rough travel as the survivors traversed the mountains. Solas was also up ahead, guiding the Herald. He wore nothing but his fine linen shirt and thin pants. Ria shook her head, wondering how he could still stand in the cold. She mentioned this to Leliana, who laughed as they climbed up the snowy slopes.

"Yes, it _does_ seem quite odd, doesn't it? But then again, I have never seen Solas affected by any weather."

"That is just unnatural," grumbled Ria as she shivered. "A mortal would die of hypothermia."

"Then perhaps he is _not_ a mortal," said Leliana.

Ria looked up to see blue eyes glinting with amusement. She rolled her eyes.

"No but really, look at him: bald head, flimsy shirt, tight pants and no shoes. And I get a strange vibe from him. He's not like the other elves."

"And you would be an expert on such a matter?"

"At least Sera is… okay, not normal but even _she's_ wearing a fur coat and boots right now."

"I see your point," said Leliana, laughing.

"Anyway, the faster we get to Skyhold, the better. I need a good warm bath."

"Patience, Ria. We are getting close."

"Good, I can't wait."

Leliana raised an eyebrow and hooked an arm around hers, leaning closer. "Are you _sure_?"

Ria felt her breath catch as the woman pressed close.

"..."

"It's so easy to tease you," Leliana murmured in her ear.

"So I've heard," she muttered, blushing.

They travelled for the next few hours in this manner, Leliana teasing her mercilessly all the way. As only a former bard could, the spymaster could use the most casual comments to embarrass her. It was only when Josephine caught up to them that the spymaster stopped picking on her. Josie smiled wickedly as she neared them.

"What's this? I see a healthy flush on our dear Surgeon's cheeks. It can't be the cold…"

Ria felt her cheeks burn.

Josephine gave Leliana a sly look. "And you, my dear," she said, nudging her. "Are laughing so much I can hear you from the back of the line."

"You're exaggerating, Josie."

"Trust me," said Josephine, rolling her eyes. Then she turned serious. "Of course, I don't mind. But take care not to overdo it. Many have lost families in Haven, and they will be in mourning."

Ria looked back at the crowd of forlorn looking people following them and instantly felt bad.

She grimaced and nodded. "You're right, I'm sorry."

"No, it was my fault," said Leliana quickly, looking ashamed. "I forgot my place."

Josephine looked between the two and smiled fondly. "Just be cautious, that's all. The sooner we reach Skyhold, the better it is for these people."

"Yes," murmured Ria, feeling the guilt rise up again.

 _There was nothing you could do. They still had to fight_ , a voice said in her head.

 _But if I warned them earlier…_

 _The outcome would have been the same._

 _Would it have?_

She walked for a time in silence, half listening to Josephine discuss the next mission with Leliana. Ria was still brooding on the events that had happened when there was a gasp of astonishment from the front. She looked up to see someone pointing to something in the distance.

"We're here! It's Skyhold!"

There was an excited murmur as everyone rushed forward to see. She, Josephine and Leliana followed the crowd as they stood under a rocky arch leading to a path that sloped down. In the distance, atop a ragged mountain was a magnificent castle crowning the white snow.

People looked gobsmacked.

Ria grinned at the expression on Leliana's face. The spymaster turned to her, eyes wide.

"I never _imagined_ that it would be so… big!"

"It's great, isn't it?"

" _Great?_ " snorted Josephine. "That doesn't even describe it! It's _perfect!_ " she said, tapping her quill on her notes.

Ria laughed. "Do you _always_ carry that thing around?"

"Of course! How do you think I keep track of everything that's going on? The number of soldiers, our resources, weapons, our allies and… everything down to the socks you wear on your feet!"

"I see your point."

"Good. Now let's not tarry any longer!"

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Weeks flew by in a blur as they settled in at Skyhold and she had no time to see Leliana in that time. The spymaster was working furiously, sending out agents and going off on missions.

And Ria wasn't short of work to do either, as ten of the healers had perished in Haven. The workload was double and she was constantly tending to the wounded. She was monitoring patients day and night, hardly getting any sleep. The cases weren't new to her, but the constant care needed was overwhelming. Some had badly dressed wounds, which festered. The older men deteriorated into sepsis. Without any antibiotics and needles for injections, Ria had to rely on the mages to help maintain blood pressure and locate the infection.

Gradually, the excitement died down and things were beginning to be organized at Skyhold. Patients were improving and few passed away. There were a couple of children with bronchiolitis, but nothing serious.

At last, after the majority of the obs stabilized, Ria found some time to visit the newly furnished throne room. Varric was standing by the fire talking to the Inquisitor. The Herald greeted her, suddenly looking like a thief caught in the act. He excused himself and left the two.

"Hey, Surgeon. How's it going?" the dwarf asked.

"Hey, Varric. Things are going well. What were you two talking about?"

He smiled, baring his teeth. "Let's just say that he needs my help."

"Are you going to tell me?"

"I'll give you a hint: I'm actually the unidentified author of a romance series."

Ria smirked. "Wait a minute…"

"You'll _never_ guess who reads my stories. And no, it's not the Inquisitor."

"Josephine?" she asked, deciding to play dumb.

"Nope."

"Vivienne?"

"Argh. I don't think she'd appreciate it." He motioned for her to come closer. " _Cassandra!_ " he whispered, sniggering.

Ria feigned horror.

"Exactly! Who knew a girl like her would read them."

"Anyone can have a romantic side."

"I'll say," guffawed the dwarf. "Speaking of _romance_ , how are you and... getting along?" he said, bouncing his eyebrows.

Ria quickly put a finger to her lips. "Do you want to spread it all over Skyhold?"

He folded his arms across his hairy chest. "It's not really a secret, Surgeon. The gossip is already spreading like wildfire," he said, grinning.

"Great… sorry to disappoint you. We're not a couple."

" _Yet_."

"…"

"Come on, I've seen you two together. Sparks are flying everywhere you know."

Ria thought back to the kiss at Haven… it was so innocent that it could have been one for luck. Were they friends, or more?

"Damn, you think so? It's been a while since I liked someone… I don't know how to read the signs anymore."

"Wow, you _really_ must have been a worker. Just take my word for it: if she's interested, it won't be long coming."

"You think?"

"Don't think about it too much. Go with the flow."

"I hope you're right."

He looked at her for a moment, grinning. "You really like her don't you?"

Ria reached for the back of her neck. "Um…"

"You don't have to say anything, Surgeon. Tell you what, why don't you talk to Josephine? She might be able to help you."

"Maybe."

"Now, wasn't there a mission you had to prepare for?"

"You're right, I'll get going. Always good talking to you Varric."

"Same here, kid. See you around."

After that, she bumped into several more people who thanked her for her efforts. She didn't recognize them, but assumed that they were the family members of the wounded.

"Maker bless you, Surgeon Ria," said the last woman, pressing a bag of coins in her hand.

"I… that's very kind of you, but please. I can't accept this- I did what I had to do."

With some persuading, the woman left with her money. Ria smiled, shaking her head and turned around… to find Vivienne eying her with that suspicious look.

"Ria, might I have a word with you?"

She knew what was coming. "I owe you an explanation."

"Yes, now come with me."

The mage led her to her chamber, which was surprisingly flash.

"Nice room."

"Thank you. Have a seat."

Ria did.

"Right… about Corypheus."

"Not just Corypheus. I have heard that _you_ were the one to suggest allying with the Templars, you knew that Lord Seeker Lucius would be in Orlais, and you seemed to know _exactly_ where to go when we went to seal the Breach. And that's not all: there are whispers that you appeared out of nowhere in the Hinterlands."

"I guess that does make me look suspicious."

"Is it true?"

"Will you promise you won't reveal this until I do myself?"

The woman regarded her for a moment. "Only because I trust you."

"Thank you. That means a lot to me." She drew in a deep breath. "Okay. Vivienne… I come from another world outside of Thedas. I fell asleep in the hospital I was working in and woke up in a cabin in the middle of the Hinterlands. Back home… Thedas and the Blight, the Inqusition… all of this is a game I played in my past time."

"A _game_?" the mage said incredulously.

"There are these things called computers," Ria tried to explain, pulling on her collar in frustration. "And on them you can play as a character in Thedas. Last year, I finished Dragon Age Inquisition, which is… basically everything that's going on here."

Vivienne just sat there gaping. "Well, I… this is certainly _not_ what I was expecting. Are you saying you know what's going to happen in the future?"

"Pretty much."

"What a strange story!"

"I just wish things did happen as it did in the game."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, I can't guarantee that everything will happen as I expect. That assassin? He wasn't supposed to appear. But if it ended like the game, that would be great- because Corypheus dies."

" _That's_ certainly good news!"

"The bad news is, I'm starting to lose my memory."

"You are?"

"Yes. My memory of what happens in the game is hazy. I even forgot that Haven would be attacked after we closed the Breach."

Vivienne considered this. "Then we must make use of your knowledge before you lose any more!"

"I know… sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I just needed people to trust me before I dropped this bomb on everyone."

"Hm…"

"So do you believe me?"

"Darling, of _course_ I do. I saw what you've been doing- your help to the Inquisition is tremendous. The healers practically sing your praise. And you've proven yourself as a friend. What more do I need to see? I can't imagine anyone would speak ill of you. But I _was_ curious to know where exactly you came from."

Ria grinned. "Well, I'm just glad you believe what I said. I've been dying to talk about it."

"And why haven't you spoken to Leliana about this?"

Maker's breath, was _everyone_ nosing into her love life?

"Leliana and I aren't a couple. Actually… I don't even know what we are."

"Please, Ria. It's quite obvious she has a thing for you. And I'm sure you do too. Though I have to admit, you look so serious and expressionless all the time."

"Hey, I _do_ express myself."

"Expressing yourself and being expressionless are different. Just relax… this isn't your hospital, or whatever you call it."

"Relax when we're at war?" asked Ria, raising an eyebrow.

"You know what I mean."

She fidgeted with the handle of her sword. "Do you really think she has feelings for me?"

Vivienne sighed. "For someone of your intelligence, I'm surprised you haven't figured it out sooner. But then again, for those who don't know her, I suppose it's not as obvious."

"I'm really not good at this."

"Romance? Darling, with your face and status, I doubt you'll fail at it."

"You'd be surprised…"

"Well, in any case, I suggest you tell this to the rest of the Circle. We could use your help for decisions."

"I will."

"Good. Now, I think Josephine wants to see you about the next mission. I presume you know what will happen there?"

Ria searched her memories and shook her head.

 _What is wrong with me?_

"I can't remember who the culprit was. But Trevelyan will find him or her, fight them and save the empress."

Vivienne sighed. "Well, that's a relief. I hope that is truly what happens. I suppose we can't always ask you to predict the future. It would be too good to be true."

"Yeah…" Then she noticed the sun was coming down. "Alright, I've got to go. Thanks for the talk," Ria said, rising from the chair.

"Anytime, my dear."

Ria left the room to finally go to Josephine, who sat in her chair near the war room. When she looked up, Ria was surprised to see her face worn and shadowed.

"Ah, Ria," she said, brightening.

"Josie, you look terrible. Are you alright?"

"Oh, I'm fine. Just… it's been a _very_ busy few weeks and I have so much to do."

Ria nodded in sympathy. "Yeah… it must be a heavy burden, managing all this."

" _You've_ also been busy, I've heard. It may be different from my work, but I can imagine the effort it takes."

"It does take some effort, yes. But that aside, you wanted to talk about our next mission?"

Josephine brightened visibly. "I wouldn't really call it a mission for you, to be honest. You don't have to do much. I just thought it would be a good experience for you."

Ria laughed. "Well, I _have_ always wanted to visit Orlais."

"Which is why I have asked for the _best_ clothes! You're going to be representing the Inquisition, and in Orlais, appearances are _everything_."

"No dresses?"

Josie sighed. "No dresses. You will have jackets and trousers of finest make. Just visit the tailor and he will size it for you."

Ria nodded. "Thanks. Is that all?"

"Oh, and we need to teach you to dance!"

She groaned.

"It's not _that_ horrible," the advisor said, giggling. "I'll have Vivienne teach you, if you like."

"That would make me feel better about making a fool of myself."

"Don't worry, you'll be fine."

Ria nodded and turned to go, but then paused.

"Josie… about Leliana…"

" _Yes_?"

She chickened out. "Never mind."

"No, continue. I want to hear what you say."

"It's just… I'm not really good at this. I don't have much experience."

Josie waited patiently.

"In a nutshell: I don't know how to express myself, and I don't even know if we're at that level yet."

The woman actually laughed. "Oh, Ria. All I can say is: be yourself. And talk to her, be there for her. Be honest and tell her how you feel."

"That's it?"

"That's it. Trust me, Leliana is not that complicated a person."

"And you're okay with me…?"

"Of course! Do you know how long I've waited for someone to bring her out of that shell? And I know you're not the sort of person to hurt her. I trust you with her."

Ria smiled.

"You should smile more often, Ria. Especially in front of Leliana."

"Why does everyone say that? I _do_ smile."

"Ah, but you look so sad all the time. So serious and business like."

"… it must be my default face."

"Well then, we must change that, won't we?" she said with a wink. "Now, I will find you later. I have much to do, I'm afraid."

"Alright, thanks for your help," Ria said, leaving the room. As she walked down the steps to find the tailor, she felt a boyish smile spreading on her lips.


	11. Chapter 9: The Grand Ball

**CHAPTER 9: The Grand Ball**

In the end, she decided to bring Dorian along.

After all, he was good with fashion. She considered asking Vivienne but she couldn't find the mage anywhere. So naturally, she thought of the Tevinter noble.

"No, no," he tutted when Ria shrugged on the black jacket. "Too dreary."

"I think it looks good."

"You look ready for a funeral."

"… I see what you mean."

The tailor held up a rich red suit. "How about this, my lady?"

"I'll try it on."

She looked up at the mage's narrowed eyes after wearing it.

"Too bright. It clashes with your personality."

The next was a dark teal jacket trimmed with gold.

"Now _that_ is what I call dashing!" Dorian crowed in delight.

"You think so?" Ria asked uncertainly, pulling at the collar. She did like the colour and how it fit her body shape more than the others.

"Worthy of court approval," came a lilting voice from the doorway.

Ria's neck almost cricked as she turned to the visitor.

The spymaster stood leaning on the doorpost, her hood down. Red hair framed her face neatly as she watched Ria. From the west, the sunlight accentuated the woman's skin so that it shone. She looked like she was posing for a make up advertisement.

Ria stared.

"Leliana… when did you-?"

"Just now," said the woman coolly, walking toward her with lithe strides.

"Sister Nightingale," said Dorian cheerfully. "You have exquisite taste in fashion. Would you say the dark teal or the russet red would win?"

Leliana reached up to adjust the collar and smoothed down the jacket, pulling at the cuffs.

"I would say the dark teal."

"Excellent choice m'lady," beamed the tailor. "I daresay it compliments her pale skin."

Ria looked at the pile of clothes she had just gone through with Dorian and nodded. "I think I'll take this."

Leliana looked up from long eyelashes, and she was so close that Ria could see every detail in the irises. Her own eyes travelled down to the straight nose, the delicate lips and elegant neck. Coupled with that, the floral scent she always wore made her dizzy.

 _Dammit, not here…_

She looked away quickly, speaking to the tailor: "How much is this?"

"Oh, you do not need to pay, my lady. It is Josephine's gift to you."

"What? No, that won't do. I'll pay," she said, shaking her head.

The man smiled. "It was Lady Josephine's _specific_ instructions that you do not pay."

Ria didn't like it, but let it go. She would have to do something for her friend in future.

"Alright, thank you."

"Enjoy your time in Orlais, Lady Ria."

 _Lady Ria,_ she thought in amusement.

The three exited the shop and Ria thanked the mage for helping.

"Oh, it was my pleasure. You know I would jump at the chance to help with this. Besides, I must thank _you_ for choosing to seek my opinion."

Ria laughed. "Well, you were the man for the job."

Dorian winked. "I'm flattered." Then he looked up at the sun. "Goodness, is that the time? Excuse me, I must go and have my evening massage."

Her eyebrows climbed high at that comment.

"Well… he's an interesting fellow, isn't he?" she said to Leliana, who laughed.

"Yes. I don't understand him myself sometimes, but… one cannot dislike him."

"That's for sure," Ria said, watching the mage run off.

She turned to the spymaster and an awkward silence stretched between them. After the weeks Leliana had been absent, Ria suddenly felt shy again in her presence.

She cleared her throat. "Anyway, did Josie tell you where I was?"

"Yes, she did. I was looking for you."

"You need something?"

"Do I have to need something?" said Leliana archly.

Ria coughed. "Well… not necessarily."

The spymaster laughed at her expression. "As it so happens, I do need the help of a surgeon."

"Is it your mission? Are you hurt?"

"Maybe," she said coyly.

"Maker's breath, what is it?"

Leliana fingered Ria's dark hair. "Patience, Ria." She tapped her right shoulder. "I need you to check this shoulder- I think I pulled it using my bow. And also my side here."

Those sounded like something a regular healer could do, but Ria decided to just go along with it.

"Okay… well, you should follow me then."

She led the other woman to the examination tents by the bottom stairs at the entrance. There were only a few patients left now, as the others could manage at home. Ana, one of the healers was redressing one man's wound when she saw them. She greeted Ria and watched them a little suspiciously as the two entered the tent.

Leliana sat down on the bed and started to take her hood, then her armour off. Ria waited, standing as stiff as a rod. This was something she'd done a thousand times or more. So why was she so nervous? Quietly, she steeled herself and switched to professional mode.

The armour and shirt were finally off to reveal perfectly rounded breasts. Where there wasn't injury, the skin was creamy, smooth and flawless.

 _God, she's beautiful._

Ria forced herself to focus and examine the right shoulder.

No bruises in the deltoid region but it was tender when she pressed there. No erythema, no wasting. But she knew these things tended to yield little information, since the inflammation happened deep in the joint or in the muscle.

She went through some passive and active movements with both shoulders: flexion 150-170 degrees, extension 40 degrees, abduction 160-180, etc. All through this, she felt Leliana's eyes on her like it burned her skin.

The spymaster winced in early abduction against resistance.

External rotation against resistance not too bad, but still loss of power.

Abdomen bruised, long gash down the left flank. It was deep and needed stitching up with some good care to avoid infection.

She pressed around the wound gently.

"How long have you had this for?" she asked Leliana, who grimaced.

"Five days."

"That's… not good. How did you manage to travel?"

"I can deal with the pain."

"You're a strong woman."

"I have to be."

"Well… don't push yourself any harder than you have to."

Leliana smiled slyly. "Is that concern I hear, Surgeon?"

"That's what... friends do."

"Of course."

"Wait here. I need to find a mage to seal it."

Ria burst out of the tent, breathing hard. Was it hot in there or what?

She didn't have to look far, as Vivienne was walking by. The mage looked at her funny after she explained.

"And you were examining her in there?"

"… where else?"

"She asked specifically for you?"

"Well, yes…"

"…"

"Don't look at me like that. I'm not a pervert."

"I wasn't implying that you were. Come on then, lead the way."

Back in the tent, Leliana raised her head as Vivienne came through.

"My, my, Leliana. What have you done to yourself?"

"Just a cut, Vivienne."

"Well, we shall have to close it, won't we?" she said, preparing her staff.

A yellow-green light surrounded the wound, and Ria marvelled as the skin knit together, leaving no trace of the gash behind.

"That's amazing."

"Thank you, Ria dear. Now, is there anything else?"

The surgeon glanced at the shoulder. "I think she's overextended her arm using her bow. Maybe a supraspinatus tear. Or teres minor."

"You should really learn some Ferelden terms, my dear. I have no idea what muscles you are talking about."

"Never mind."

"I suppose I could just attempt to heal all the muscles…"

She used her staff again, and Leliana sighed in relief. "Thank you, that feels much better."

"Any time, dear. Just be careful on your missions next time."

Vivienne left the tent, leaving the two alone.

Ria handed the spymaster her clothes and armour. As she put them on, Ria noticed she took her time. The sound as it slid over smooth skin was enough to make her sweat.

 _What am I thinking?_

Finally, the armour was on and she relaxed. Leliana rose and turned to face her.

"Thank you."

"No worries."

There was a small tug at the corner of the woman's mouth. Then she leaned in to kiss Ria on the lips. It was a gentle kiss. Soft lips brushed hers and lingered there before drawing back. The Orlesian smiled a satisfied smile, and then left without another word.

Ria stood there, stunned.

It wasn't until Ana came into the tent that she finally moved.

"Surgeon, are you still in there? The next patient needs the tent."

"Oh… right. Send them through."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"The sooner we get out of here, the better," grumbled Cassandra.

"It's not so bad," said the Inquisitor, grinning. "Besides, I get to dance with you."

"You… you want to dance with-with me?" stammered the Seeker, eyes widening.

"Why? Is there a problem?"

Ria smirked as she listened in on their conversation. Things were going well for them, and it was fun to watch their relationship.

As for herself… she shivered as she remembered the kiss from a few days ago. It was unlike any she'd had before… the sensation was amazing. Even now, every sensory cell on her lips remembered the feeling. She closed her eyes, a grin spreading as she relived the memory.

 _Stop smiling like a fool._

Ria cast her eyes about, trying to look like she was doing something. To be honest, only the Inquisitor was supposed to be investigating the palace so she really had nothing to do. To the left, she spotted Josephine and Cullen, but still didn't see Leliana anywhere.

Josephine looked very pretty in a violet dress made of pricey velvet, though Ria didn't envy her wearing the corset. That thing looked like it could crush your ribs.

As for Vivienne, she looked like the queen of Rivain in an elegant high collared silver dress.

Cullen looked like a prince in his scarlet suit and Dorian looked charming in a highly stylized Tevinter jacket.

Everyone was really dressed up for the ball. Women everywhere wore expensive dresses with frills and elaborate patterns, men stood proud and pompous in their long tailed coats and tight breeches. An Orlesian passed by, serving glasses of wine. Ria took one sip and grimaced at the strange taste.

 _They obviously didn't make this from grapes._

She held the glass in her hand and took in the sight. The palace really was magnificent with its elegant furniture, the decorations, dazzling chandeliers and… just the grandeur of the place. If she had thought it impressive in the game, it was ten times better in real life.

A woman passed by with her friend, gasping. " _What_ is Lady Cassandra wearing?"

"I agree, absolutely terrible," said the friend, giggling.

Ria listened, snorting. These Orlesians took fashion _very_ seriously.

Shaking her head, she tipped the rest of the wine into a flowerpot and walked about. As she did, she heard more gasps and looked in their direction. Orlesian noblemen and women stared down at the stairs. When Ria followed their gazes, she felt like the world was tilting.

Coming up the steps was a beautiful woman, her auburn hair shining like silk in the light. Her dress was a deep turquoise, the material shimmering with every movement. It hugged her figure gracefully, accenting her long neck, the clear skin and slender arms.

Ria stared at her, feeling like her feet were stuck to the floor.

"Well, don't just _stand_ there." It was Josie. "Go to the lady."

She nodded slowly. This had to be a dream.

Leliana ascended, enjoying every minute of it. Men offered to accompany her and women glared jealously. She carried herself like-no, better than a noblewoman, and stood out like a gem among stones. The woman saw her now, a teasing glint in her eyes.

Ria finally got there, stopping in front of her. The bright spark never left those blue irises.

She bowed and offered Leliana her arm. There were whispers all around but the spymaster didn't seem to care- she took it.

They didn't talk- they just looked at each other as they walked. Ria, wondering who this person was. And Leliana… a look of triumph dominated her face. The serving man passed her again and Ria took one glass, handing it to Leliana. The spymaster drank from it, eyes never leaving hers. A small smile graced those wine drenched lips.

"You look beautiful," Ria finally managed to say.

"And you look dashing, Surgeon," replied Leliana, enjoying the game.

Ria smiled. "I think you've earned yourself a lot of enemies tonight."

"How so?" the Orlesian said, feigning ignorance.

"By proving to be a goddess among mortals."

 _Where did_ that _come from?_

Something changed in Leliana's face. She blushed.

"That is… most flattering."

"It's true."

A charming smile touched her lips. "Well then," she said, squeezing Ria's arm. "I shall have to make use of my powers today, won't I?"

"If it is your will," said Ria, with a grin.

Throughout the evening, they talked of many things- things that Ria found that she enjoyed for the first time. Leliana was a master with words, sometimes drawing out a long discussion about topics that should be boring. And sometimes… her teasing had Ria stammering.

She knew she had the surgeon wrapped around her finger.

Ah, but the shoes. The former bard _loved_ talking about shoes.

"Have you seen the shoes Lady Clarice is wearing? So tasteless…" she tutted.

If someone else had talked to her about this, Ria would have tried to run away. But by Andraste, this woman sounded so adorable. She found herself fighting down a silly grin.

She decided to play along.

"Yes, so clunky and plain," she said. "She could be tap dancing in those."

At this, Leliana perused her with an eye. "Not bad… for an amateur."

Ria gave her a wolfish grin and jerked her head in a man by the chairs. "What about him? I think that headgear could come down at any moment."

"Well, it _does_ look twice the size of his head."

"And that mask, it-"

The two of them nearly doubled over in laughter as the headpiece actually _did_ fall from his head. He barely managed to catch it in time before it tumbled to the floor. There were giggles all around as people observed. A flush spread across the man's face under his mask. She had to give it to him, though- he regained his composure quickly.

"You were saying about that mask?" said Leliana after she had recovered.

"I was going to say: it looks like something from _Phantom of the Opera_."

Leliana raised a fine eyebrow as she explained the play and its storyline. The Orlesian seemed impressed with the story and intrigued by the characters.

"Ooh, now you've piqued my interest. A mysterious, disfigured man in love with a beautiful woman. That's a tragically romantic play."

"I know… I always felt sorry for him."

"And what about that other young man? Her sweetheart?"

"I think he's just a pathetic pretty boy."

Leliana pretended to gape at her. "You are _bad_."

It was Ria's turn to raise an eyebrow. " _I'm_ bad? Should I remind you how you've been teasing me for the past few hours?"

She laughed. "Oh, but you are so _fun_ to tease!"

"I _completely_ agree with you, my dear," said a familiar voice.

Ria rolled her eyes. "Enjoying the party, Vivienne?"

The mage smirked at the change in subject. "Darling, it's an _Orlesian_ ball. It's _always_ interesting."

"She's right about that. I can already hear some juicy gossip around us," said Leliana with a gleam in her eye.

"And what have _you_ heard, Leliana?" said Vivienne.

"Oh, this and that. Like how Lord Albert has been flirting with Lady Marianne. His wife is furious with him."

"I've got a better one," said Vivienne, smiling. "The Lady Isabelle is having an affair with Lady Vanessa."

Leliana's eyes widened. "Oh, scandalous!"

Ria listened awkwardly. She didn't know the people they were talking about, and gossiping always made the back of her neck prickle.

The two women continued to whisper and exchange information as Ria stood, scanning the room.

A movement caught her eye. At the entrance to the Guest room, an elf glanced about her quickly before going in. Not long after, the Inquisitor moved to the Guest wing.

Ria frowned but trusted that he knew what he was doing.

Vivienne sighed as a lord approached. "I predict the man wants to discuss magic again. Some odd project of his, I think. Though, why he thinks I would help him is beyond me."

"I don't envy you, Vivienne," said Leliana with a smile.

"Until later, spymaster. And be careful, both of you, or you will be the next favourite subject of gossip."

"We will, don't worry."

There was another round of wine and Leliana picked up a glass.

Ria eyed it with disapproval. "Don't drink too much of that."

The woman laughed. "It's alright. These are quite dilute- they can't have everyone falling drunk."

"Still."

"Always so health conscious."

"It's my job."

The serving man extended the plate to her. "Mademoiselle," he said.

Ria took one and had a small sip, trying not to grimace again.

"This is a bit different to what I'm used to."

The spymaster smiled. "It is Orlesian wine, pressed from pears and a few other exotic ingredients. Hence the unique taste."

"I see."

They moved to converse with Josephine, then Cullen, then Dorian, and then Cassandra. Occasionally, Ria was surprised to be asked by some of the nobles for a dance. She politely declined but noticed that Leliana watched them with a gaze that could rival a cobra's. Time flew by, and by the end of it, Ria was trying to stifle a yawn. Leliana noticed and leaned in closer.

"Don't fall asleep quite yet, we still have the dance."

Ah, that.

As if on cue, the bell sounded and there was an excited hum as everyone gathered to the ballroom. Ria felt her own heart hammering in her chest as she dreaded the next hour. They walked through the doors to the vast room. A masterfully polished floor awaited them, and there was very little space as the crowd grew. Ria found herself pressed _very_ close to Leliana. Her head felt like it was floating in the scent of Andraste's Grace.

Empress Celene appeared at the rail on the other side. She was a fine woman- regal and elegant. But Ria had to stop smirking at the dress she wore. That thing on her back was so high, so ridiculously large that she looked like a pearl in a clam.

 _Leliana's influence is starting to rub off on me._

She gave a brief speech and the music began. It was a bright, lively piece and everyone vied for a space on the dance floor. Ria let them go. Besides, she was trying to delay the moment when she would publicly disgrace herself.

Back in Skyhold, she had a few lessons with Vivienne, who wasn't too impressed on the first day. Maker, she was a surgeon, not a dancer! Although she did improve, Ria had to spend the rest of the days left to practise in her bedroom as well.

Considering the display of grace and elegance on the dance floor right now, Ria wasn't going to enjoy it. She felt a bit better when some of the men made mistakes and stepped on the lady's shoes. But if they looked like that from here… she groaned as she imagined her own self.

Gradually, the crowd grew smaller as those who danced retreated to the guest room. Ria knew she couldn't put it off any longer. With a painful swallow, she turned to Leliana, who was trying not to smile.

Ria cleared her throat and half bowed. "May I have this dance, my lady?"

"You may," said Leliana, taking her arm.

The pair walked down the steps and there were whispers around them. Some of the men looked disappointed and women visibly relieved.

Somehow, this made her even more nervous.

When they reached the lower level, the couples all took position. Thankfully, her practices had built a habit into her. Ria took Leliana's hands, which were surprisingly soft and delicate for someone who used daggers.

As the woman held her gaze, all Ria could think about was how exquisite she was. Leliana was the most beautiful woman she had ever met. It was _so_ cliché, yet so true… not only in form but everything about her. Ria's _soul_ was drawn to hers.

 _By the Maker, I scoffed at all those cheesy lines and now I'm thinking them!_

The short interlude ended as the music turned slow and warm, graceful and romantic.

 _You're kidding me._

She remembered the cliché TV shows where the characters slow danced at the centre. Watching them, she had laughed. But now… she understood.

And she danced, moving as if in a dream. Ria never recalled what she actually did, or if she ever stepped on Leliana. But there was only the music, only the feeling of the spymaster's hands in hers, the drug-like effect of those eyes, and the pleasant pressure of her body on hers. Together, they were alone in a realm of their own. When she twirled the Orlesian around, the soft hair brushed her cheek. And again, those eyes… hypnotizing.

Time had never been so fast to her.

The last of the notes faded into resounding applause. There was a murmur of approval as Ria dipped her partner down with fluidity.

She brought Leliana back up gently and escorted her upstairs. Her legs felt like they didn't belong to her. There was nodding and clapping as they walked back to the main room.

Vivienne was the first to congratulate her.

"Well! You have _certainly_ exceeded my expectations. I admit, I had my doubts… but no matter. _Everyone_ is talking about your performance."

"You're joking," said Ria, staring. "I'm sure there were others who were much better."

"Perhaps in technique, but there was such _flow_ in your dance. My dear, I am so proud. And Leliana, you were a _delight_ to watch. Clearly your skills haven't disappeared."

"Yes, a very well done!" said Dorian, walking toward them with a charming smile. "Couldn't have danced better myself."

Leliana laughed warmly. "Thank you, Vivienne, Dorian. It was… certainly memorable."

"Then I hope you enjoy the rest of the evening. Though I do wonder where the Inquisitor has disappeared to. Lady Florianne is waiting impatiently for him to show."

"I am sure he is busy getting ready," said Leliana, giving Vivienne a warning look. _Don't give away too much of the mission._

"Yes, I'm sure. I will see you two later. The ambassador wants my attention."

Dorian congratulated them once more and left to give them time together.

After them, the two were swamped by a good number of nobles who complimented their dancing.

"Such _passion_ , such _fluidity!_ " said one man, his whiskers bouncing. They thanked him as he left still praising them to anyone who would listen.

Ria chuckled watching him and turned back to Leliana. The woman was gazing at her with such intensity that Ria blushed. A sweet smile curved her lips. Without a word, the Orlesian took her wrist with cool fingers and led her to a balcony that overlooked the palace.

There was a gentle breeze and the scent of garden flowers in the air. High quality perfume drifted out from the ladies inside. But for Ria, the smell of Andraste's Grace overpowered them all. Leliana leaned on the rail and looked to the distance.

Ria mirrored her, trying to clear her dazed head and failing.

"You know, I once visited Val Royeaux with someone who was very close to me. The palace and its splendour, the marvellous statues and decorations. It was breathtaking, and it swept me off my feet. To my young eyes, it was beautiful. But it was here in Orlais that I was also betrayed by her. And Orlais, with all its allure, was a painful reminder to me. I saw it for what it was: a Game. The whispers, the lies, the plots. It was my home, but also a prison."

Ria listened intently, feeling the gravity of what she said. Leliana spoke with a neutral voice, but the former bard could hide emotions well.

"But now…" she finally turned her head to smile at Ria. "Now I feel safe. It's been a long time since I felt… felt anything. And I feel safe with you."

A surge of warmth spread in her chest. She was hopeless at romance, yes, but here in the presence of this woman, she found the answer.

 _Just listen to your heart, you idiot_.

Ria reached out uncertainly to place her hand on Leliana's.

"I would never hurt you, Leliana," she said, thinking of Marjolaine. "All of them... they can fall with their Game. But you have to know- I wouldn't play it on you."

And with a boldness borne of adrenaline, Ria brought the hand to her lips.

Leliana gazed at her with an unreadable expression. Then, with the swiftness only a bard could have, she pulled Ria's head towards her for a kiss.

The sensation was astronomical, out of this world. If someone had told her she would see fireworks and stars, Ria would have scoffed. As it was, they weren't too far off.

She thought she could hear bells ringing. An electric shock coursed up her body and her brain felt like it was melting. Ria's eyelids closed and she leaned into the kiss. The spymaster's hand came down to her neck, sending shivers down her spine. She sighed contentedly, putting a hand on the small of the woman's back. And then… Leliana fell limp in her arms.

Ria stared down at the spymaster, unable to think.

"Leliana!" she said. She shook her but there was no response. A finger to the carotid, faint breathing from her nose, chest rise and fall, heart beating.

She was… asleep?

There was a smattering of thumps from behind, and Ria turned in horror to see bodies crumpling to the ground inside the palace.

 _What's going on?_


	12. Chapter 10: Defend the Empress

**CHAPTER 10: Defend the Empress**

"Stop!" a voice hissed from the shadows.

Ria stopped running, whirling around. There was a pillar to the left, a door to the right but no one was there.

"Do you want them to catch you?" said the voice again. This time, the elf that Ria had seen earlier emerged, coming up the steps.

"You!" Ria said angrily. "I thought you looked suspicious."

"I admit I've done things I'm not proud of," she said. "But I am not the enemy."

"Then why are you still standing?"

"Because I know Gaspard, and I know Florianne."

Ria crossed her arms. "So _they're_ planning to kill Celene."

"Yes, and they _will_ if you don't help me."

She had no choice. Everyone else was unconscious. "They drugged the wine didn't they?"

The elf nodded. "Clever. Since you are still awake, I presume you knew?"

"Only in retrospect. I don't drink much, and that wine was bad anyway."

She smiled. "Very wise." Then the elf turned serious. "Your inquisitor has been knocked out trying to poke around."

"Great…"

"We don't have much time, follow me."

Ria did, and tried to look for anybody who was still awake. There were none. As they neared the ballroom, the elf slipped in quietly and hid behind a suit of armour. Ria did the same, and jumped as a loud laugh echoed.

"Ah, cousin Celene," tutted Florianne, gliding in on the far side. Knights in heavy armour filed in, steel boots stomping on the floor. "You should have fled when you had the chance."

The empress was still standing, she hadn't had the wine.

"I should have known you were the culprit," said the empress acidly.

Gaspard joined Florianne, smiling. "Let us end this now, sister."

"Certainly. _After_ I gloat about my victory."

Ria watched in horror. This wasn't what happened in the game. In the game, the Inquisitor was supposed to be here to save the day.

"Do you have a plan?" she hissed to the elf.

"A few tricks," she whispered back. The woman tossed her a flask. It was filled with a greenish gas. "Smoke bomb," was the explanation. She tossed her something else. Ria held a sheathed dagger and had a glimpse at the blade, its sheen familiar…

"It's poisoned."

The elf nodded quickly, flicking a glance at Celene, who was bragging about her success. "You throw that and I'll kill those knights."

"And then?"

"We improvise."

Ria groaned inwardly. She hated improvising.

The elf was already moving, and Ria grasped the flask in her hand, running. The movement caught Florianne's attention.

"What's this! Guards!"

There was no time to delay. Ria hurled the bomb at the knights and prayed that her high school baseball skills would help. The flask shattered at their feet and a huge cloud of smoke billowed across the whole length of the hall. Ria coughed at the smell but pressed on to Florianne. She and her brother were on the other side so she had to sprint to catch them. Behind her, she heard a powerful explosion and tasted electricity in the air. There were several thumps as knights crashed to the ground.

Florianne was bent over coughing with her brother, but as soon as she saw Ria, she snarled. The empress was on the ground, holding a cloth to her face.

"Your highness!" shouted Ria, trying to reach her before Florianne.

Celene got up and started stumbling toward her. An arrow whizzed right in front of Florianne's nose before she could get close. She glared at the elf. Gaspard drew his sword, still coughing, and went for the archer.

A knight growled and swung his sword from behind and Ria barely dodged in time. She drew her own weapon and parried his heavy blows, glancing worriedly at the empress.

 _I haven't got time for this. Where's the gap in his armour?_

The surgeon hadn't faced knights before, and she found the man efficiently protected. She did the only thing she could do- tripped him. The knight fell flat on his face and wrenched his mask away to howl at the broken nose.

Ria gripped her sword and dagger and charged at Florianne, hoping to scare her. On the contrary, Florianne unsheathed two wicked looking daggers and smiled. The two clashed together, slashing and parrying, dodging and lunging. Ria quickly realized what a formidable foe she was.

 _Crap, I'm going to die._

The woman was fast, really fast. Even in that dress, she moved like a master rogue, lashing out with her daggers. Ria already sported a lot of cuts and bruises from those weapons and it was only a matter of time before she slipped…

With a feral growl, she twisted a dagger out of Florianne's hand and kicked her in the abdomen. She stumbled but dodged as Ria tried to stab her. Rolling to the side, she flicked her wrist and cut Ria's calf. The blade dug into flesh and the surgeon cried out, buckling. She gritted her teeth and parried when the duchess took a swipe. Then another, and another until the edge of her dagger slipped past Ria's defence… into her abdomen.

Ria choked as the pain exploded. It was searing, an overwhelming torture as the blade twisted a path to her bowels. A yell tore from her lips as she fell to the ground. Florianne's smirking face swam above her.

"Such a pretty face… such a waste."

She walked leisurely to the empress, who was shaking against the rail but glared defiantly.

"You may have the victory today, Florianne. But the Maker sees all."

"The _Maker_?" Florianne sneered. "There is no _Maker_. I serve the _new_ god. The Elder One!"

Ria summoned her last strength, gasping and crawling toward her. She thought about everything she'd been through. Waking up in the Hinterlands, meeting Mother Giselle, the soldiers, the Inquisition, closing the Breach and surviving Haven… and Leliana. She couldn't let them down.

Vaguely, she could hear limping steps behind her. The duchess turned around.

"Ah, _Briala_. How quaint. I shall enjoy killing you- and avenge my brother's death."

She lunged at the elf. Ria grasped the dagger on the ground and held it with a trembling hand.

Just a little closer…

Yes! The duchess stepped back, her leg in sight.

 _Maker guide my hand_ , she thought desperately as she plunged the dagger in. Florianne screamed and hissed, kicking Ria in the head.

And it all went black.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

A few times, the cool rim of glass was pressed to her lips, but Ria slipped in and out of consciousness. Cold liquid ran down her throat slowly. Then she dreamed of home, where her mother opened the door to let her brother in.

 _He had just walked Jager._

 _The Siberian husky barked excitedly. A young Ria stopped making lunch and bent down to pat her dog._

" _Did you have fun, boy?"_

 _Jager closed his eyes as she scratched behind the ears._

 _Ria laughed. "You like that don't you? Yes, you do."_

" _Don't spoil him," said her brother, rolling his eyes. "He ate the neighbour's rubbish!"_

"Again _?" she said, sighing._

 _Jager seemed to grin in response._

" _Alright," their mother said, chuckling. "Now go and wash him. I don't want his fur on the carpet."_

" _It's your turn, Ria."_

" _Bro, it's your turn today."_

" _I did it last week!"_

" _What are you-"_

" _That's enough! Now Ria, go and take him outside."_

" _You never take my side," huffed Ria._

" _I don't take sides, Ria. Just remember who pays for your education. If it weren't for me, you wouldn't be in med school."_

 _Her daughter grumbled but took the leash and left the house._

 _As she closed the door behind her, a car pulled up in the driveway. Dad was home._

" _Dad?" she asked, peering cautiously at his face._

 _The man stepped out of the car, his face shadowed. He tried to smile but it was more like a twist of the lips._

 _In this kind of mood, Ria knew it was a bad idea to talk to him. So she let him enter the house, and sure enough, she could already hear shouting from inside._

" _Come on, Jager," she said flatly to her dog. "Let's go for another walk."_

 _Later when she returned, she found her father in the kitchen drinking. There were several empty bottles and one lying on the floor, smashed to pieces. Ria kept to the shadows and walked upstairs. When she went past her mother's room, she heard sobbing from inside…_

 _The scene changed and the harsh sound of a slap cut the air._

" _You do not speak to your father like that! You hear me?"_

" _Why shouldn't I? You know what you've done! You're such a hypocrite!"_

 _Her father's face became murderous._

" _I am the head of this house! I demand that you show me respect!"_

" _I will not obey someone I utterly despise!"_

 _At this, the man flung the pieces of paper in her face and it drew blood. The young Ria stood there, shaking in rage._

 _She glared up at him in loathing._

" _You little bitch! We didn't bring you up to be like this!"_

 _Ria stood there, hands balled into fists. "You_ never _treated mum the way you should have. Do you even know what she's going through right now? You always turn a blind eye!"_

" _Enough! Get out of this house- I never want to see your face again!"_

 _The girl turned and marched out of the house, opening the door. She paused, and when she looked back, she saw her father throwing the photo frames on the ground. Ria found that she didn't care…_

Ria opened her eyes to gasps and screams all around. Women were shrieking, men were shouting angrily. Everything was blurry, and there was acid in her throat. And the pain… she could still feel the knife as it twisted its way through flesh and muscle. Steady hands lifted her neck off the ground.

"Easy," said a woman. What was her name? … Briala. That was it. "Drink this."

Ria did, and drifted back into darkness.

 _Dreams were a confused jumble of faces and places. Teachers from long ago, schools from far away in another world, hospitals across the country… then scenes of darkness and terror as darkspawn leered. Then it was back in Skyhold, in Josephine's office. She looked withdrawn and empty as she told Ria the Inquisition had failed. Ria felt the cold hand of fear as a despair demon stood in front of her._

 _And then… there was a blinding white light- it consumed everything in sight until Ria was standing at the bottom of a hill. She stared as the sky became a fathomless blue. The grass was a verdant green, so green that it hurt to look. Flowers surrounded her, vibrant colours making her dizzy. But she felt a peace. A peace she had never known._

 _She walked up this hill, brushing her hand on the long blades of grass. At the top, she saw the source of the light. It wasn't the sun, because the sun didn't move. No, this light came to her, like a person walking. Ria felt a warmth flood her like a deluge of hot liquid._

 _It flowed from her head down to her toes, covering every inch._

" _Who are you?" she whispered._

 _Have no fear, a voice told her. No… it wasn't a voice. It was more like a feeling, an impression._

 _Come to me, child, and I shall embrace you. In my arms lies Eternity._

 _Without thinking, she walked toward the light…_

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

There were voices. Angry, confused, frustrated. Ria tried to open her eyes but found the lids stuck together.

"… The wound was in deep, Sister Nightingale. I have done my best, but it requires good knowledge of anatomy to heal it. And she's lost a lot of blood."

"Perhaps a mage…?"

"Then fetch one!" snapped a familiar voice. "Why are you still here?"

"Y-yes, m'lady!"

"Leliana, my dear… I know you are upset, but-"

"We were close, _too_ close!" Leliana hissed. "The Inquisitor unconscious, _all_ of us drugged. We almost failed."

"Yes, Leliana. But we can discuss that later," said Josephine's pacifying voice. "The main thing is that Florianne is dead and the empress is safe."

The spymaster took a deep breath.

Vivienne sighed. "If I knew how to heal the damage, I would. But… it may have gone past the bowels to the kidney. Perhaps even to the spleen."

Ria struggled to swallow. At last she found the strength to peel her eyelids apart. Blood irritated her throat and she coughed, instantly regretting it.

Leliana's face came into view as Ria squinted.

"Ria! Thank the Maker!" she said, face ashen in the light. "Ria, can you hear me?"

The spymaster grasped her hand so tightly she could crush it.

"Hi," she said, smiling painfully.

"You fool!" said Leliana, glaring through a film of tears. "I-we thought you were dead!"

"Yes," said Dorian, his moustache appearing. "We found you cold on the floor in a pool of your own blood. You're quite the hero now."

Trust Dorian and his humour.

Ria started to laugh, and then groaned as a new spasm of pain exploded.

"Stay still," scolded Leliana, though her eyes were soft.

"Briala… helped me," she said through gritted teeth.

Josephine smiled sadly at her. "Yes, she told us everything. But we shall talk of this later. Just rest."

Ria shivered as she lay there, feeling drained. Then she closed her eyes.

She was alive and Florianne dead. The thought brought a smile to her face.

There was a gentle pressure as soft lips brushed against her cheek. Leliana.

While they waited for another mage, her companions discussed further plans, including the help they needed from the empress. For once, Ria switched off and focussed on the gentle hand that held hers. The spymaster stroked her cheek and smoothed out her hair. Ria found the touch relaxing and it alleviated some of the pain.

Finally, after some time, footsteps approached. The rustle of a dress, then a tutting sound.

"Morrigan?" came Leliana's incredulous voice. " _You_ are the empress'-"

"Yes. Now, do you want me to heal her… or not?"

Ria opened her eyes again to stare at the witch. She looked exactly like she did in the game. Black hair, pale face, that superior smile. Instead of her usual tattered clothes, she was wearing an elegant dress.

"Am I glad to see you," said Ria, grinning.

"You know her?" asked Leliana, eyebrows climbing high.

Ria didn't have the strength to reply. Everything was becoming blurry again. The witch gave her an odd look but didn't say anything.

"'Tis a deep wound and we have not much time. Do not distract me while I cast the spell."

No one objected and let her have space. Ria saw a violet glow around her abdomen, suffusing her face and making her relax. There was a prickly sensation as her skin began to move. She felt her organs tremble inside her and trusted that the tissue was being knit together again. She hoped.

Then it was over.

Morrigan sighed. "I have done what I could. Let the rest heal on their own."

"So, that's it?" said Josephine.

"Were you expecting fire from heaven and the girl rising in full health?"

"Well…"

"Thank you, Morrigan," said Leliana.

"You are… welcome, Leliana," the witch replied, a little doubtfully. She turned back to Ria. "You may move about now, but it will hurt for the next week. I have sealed the wounds but the inflammation is part of the healing. Let nature take its course."

Ria nodded, sitting up. She was surprised to feel the pain had subsided.

"Are you alright?" asked Leliana uncertainly.

She smiled at the woman. "Much better."

Leliana's shoulders relaxed and she gazed at her softly.

Cassandra coughed a little and Ria looked up at her.

"It is good to see you well, Surgeon."

"Thank you."

A man suddenly came running in. "My lady, her Highness- empress Celene," he announced.

Behind him the woman came, grace in every step. At her side stood Briala, who smiled at her. To Ria's surprise, the empress bowed.

"Surgeon Ria, I heard you had recovered. I have come to express my utmost gratitude for saving my life. If not for you, Gaspard would be on the throne and Orlais thrown into chaos."

Ria bowed in return. "I… simply did what was right, your Highness."

Celene smiled. "That does not make it any less noble. You have the sincere gratitude of Orlais. And I shall lend all my strength to the Inqusition."

"That means a lot to us, your Grace."

The empress nodded. "I am glad. Now… I shall have my healers care for you during your stay. The ball may be over, but the night is not. Please, make yourselves comfortable."

Everyone murmured their thanks as Celene left with Briala.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

They were back on the balcony again.

Ria leaned on her partner as the pain surfaced. It was mild, but still discomforting.

"Is it the pain?" asked Leliana, concerned.

"Don't worry, it's nothing."

The spymaster looked dubious but didn't press her. "At least the danger has passed."

"Yeah… it's over," said Ria, chuckling. "And we did what we came here for. Though… I never imagined this would happen. The Inquisitor knocked out, everyone drugged and I was left with a stranger to kill Florianne. I freaked out."

Leliana stayed silent. At this, Ria looked at her, worried.

"Leliana?"

"I thought I lost you."

"Ah… that."

"Yes, that. When I woke up and saw you on the floor…. Blood _everywhere_. I can't get that picture out of my mind."

Ria tried not to laugh. "But I'm here…" she said gently, turning Leliana to face her. "I'm here, and I'm fine."

"But you might not have been," breathed the woman, shaking her head. "I finally meet someone I care for, and…"

"And what? She does stupid things?" she said, grinning.

The spymaster sighed.

Ria hesitated shyly, but then took her hand. "You look beautiful tonight. Like an angel."

Leliana blushed. When she did, it was gorgeous. Usually it was the surgeon who turned red, caught unawares.

Music floated out from indoors, and it was that song. Their song.

She bowed.

"May I have this dance, my lady?"

The Orlesian smiled, lips curling despite herself. "Yes, Ria. You may."

And they danced, just as they had before. There wasn't much structure to their dance, but they simply enjoyed the contact, the movement. Under the moonlight, the pair swayed to the melody, eyes lost in each other's.


	13. Chapter 11: Ser Ria

**CHAPTER 11: Ser Ria**

The seasons were changing. Mountaintops glistened with moisture as the snow melted under the sun. Winds that once chilled the bone were now a meandering breeze.

Every morning the men would raise the flags of the Inquisition, grunting against the frozen ropes. They no longer had to. After the success at the Winter Palace, news had spread quickly, fuelling the Inquisition with strength. There was a new energy amongst the people now, an excitement and hope that they would prevail.

Ria stood on the battlements, looking over the white valleys. The wind rattled her new armour and whipped at her face, but she didn't mind. She was thinking of the task ahead.

"Ser Ria."

She turned at the Inquisitor's voice. Ser Ria, he'd said.

 _I'm not going to lie, it sounds good._

Ever since her deed in Orlais, she'd been hailed as some kind of hero. Requests were made for her to be elevated in status, though she had first declined. But even Josephine and Cullen had agreed that she deserved it. Some of the Orlesians that followed them to Skyhold would constantly bow to her, thanking her profusely. After much discussion, they promoted her to Knighthood, which was a little embarrassing. _She_ herself didn't think she had the skills to be a knight. But Cullen said she was good enough, so… _might as well_ , she thought.

And Mother Giselle had nodded. "I do not like the danger you will be facing, but I also know that if it is the Maker's will, then I cannot change it. You have my blessing."

Leliana, however, had been disapproving. She was happy for her... but also hated the fact that Ria had to fight.

" _Haven't you had enough danger already?" she had said in the war room, arms crossed._

 _Damn, she looked intimidating in that hood. But she also looked smoking hot._

 _Cullen stepped in. "I think she has proved herself adequately. At Haven, Closing the Breach, killing Florianne. And I've seen her fight- she has talent."_

 _The spymaster glared at him then. "I don't doubt her abilities. I'm worried about the near death situations she keeps having."_

" _We always have near death situations," Ria pointed out. "We're at war, remember? I'll survive."_

" _That's exactly the sort of attitude that gets people killed," the woman had retorted._

" _Now, now, let's not get into a lovers' quarrel," Dorian had said, making Ria blush._

 _Leliana was unfazed. "We need her to do a surgeon's job. She can't be a knight at the same time!"_

" _Why not?" challenged the Commander. "We're getting near the end of our mission. It's all very well that people are healthy, but we need more fighters now. Once we're on the battlefield, it will be chaos. Lives will be lost faster than you can save them."_

 _Ria nodded. "Well said, Commander. But… I don't know about this Knighthood…"_

" _Nonsense, you'll be fine."_

" _I can fight as a soldier, but my skills aren't at that level yet."_

" _You've been trained by me. That is enough."_

" _He speaks the truth," said Cassandra. "I have seen her in battle, and to have fought Florianne and lived is no small feat."_

" _I agree with you," said Josie, earning a glare from Leliana. "But like Leliana, I am worried that it may be too much."_

" _Everyone's going to have to fight, one way or another," said Ria._

" _She's right," said Cullen gravely. "If no one other than Leliana objects, I promote her to knighthood!" He slammed a fist on the table._

Trevelyan approached her now, his arm in a sling. The bastard who had knocked him out at the palace had also broken the man's arm. With magic, this could be rectified, but Vivienne had insisted the bones need to align first. Until then, there was nothing they could do.

He was smiling.

"Yes, Inquisitor?"

"She's here. The Champion of Kirkwall- I know you've wanted to meet her."

Ria felt the fangirl in her cheer. "Great! I mean… good."

Maxwell laughed. "She's looking forward to seeing you as well. Word of you has reached far and wide now."

"I've never really wanted _fame_."

"Nevertheless, you have it. Come on, I'll take you to her."

Ria followed him, trying not to look too excited. She was going to meet Hawke!

They walked down two flights of stone steps to a level overlooking the sparring grounds. Leaning on the edge looking pensive, was a woman with short black hair, electric blue eyes and a wry mouth. Her armour fitted her like she was born with it. Varric stood next to her, waiting.

At their arrival, she turned. "Ah, Inquisitor. And you must be Ser Ria."

"I am. Nice to meet you."

"Right back at you. I've heard a lot about your deeds- killing an assassin and saving the Empress. Not to mention you're a surgeon. Do you ever have time to catch your breath?"

Ria chuckled. "Not often, no... but then again, we _are_ at war. There's no time to waste."

"Ah, a diligent worker. Straight to the point, and you get things done- I like that. We'll get along nicely."

Talking to Hawke, they learned of her investigation into red lyrium. She had contacted Alistair for help, but he was forced into hiding due to corruption in the Grey Warden ranks. Marian also thought Corypheus was related to the missing Grey Wardens. They agreed to meet up with her and Alistair in Crestwood. Ria shook hands with the woman again before descending the steps with Maxwell.

"So… what did you think?" he asked her.

"She looks exactly how I imagined."

The Inquisitor gave her a piercing gaze. "You know… you still haven't given me an explanation about how you knew there were survivors in Haven."

She sighed. "I've only told one person so far… today, Herald. I will explain it all today."

"At the war room?"

"At the war room," she promised.

They walked in silence for a while before he spoke, thoughtful. "Corypheus' influence extends farther than I expected."

"You're worried about the Grey Wardens."

He nodded. "Sometimes… sometimes I feel he's just toying with us, and that we're only seeing the tip of the iceberg."

"I know what you mean… there are just too many areas to investigate. He really has his connections."

"Which is why every ally counts. We have to bleed so many times to gain _one_ alliance. _One_ ," he said in frustration.

"At least we made it this far. The Inquisition was a bit of a joke at the start, remember? Look where we are now."

"I guess you're right."

Ria patted his shoulder. "Cheer up, Inquisitor. We're nearly there- just save the Grey Wardens and you're up against red lyrium face."

"Red lyrium face?" asked Maxwell, a twist in his lips.

"He has a lot of it on his head," she explained lamely, shrugging.

Trevelyan laughed. "Whatever you say."

They reached the throne room and climbed the steps. When they entered the war room, Morrigan was also present. The witch turned her golden eyes on her, a question in them. She bowed.

"Inquisitor, Ser Ria."

"Good morning, Morrigan," said the Inquisitor pleasantly.

Cullen, Josephine, Leliana and Cassandra waited expectantly for Maxwell to explain what they had learned.

"We met Hawke and it seems she might have a lead on the Grey Wardens."

Leliana breathed out. "That is good news."

"But it looks like Corypheus might be involved in their disappearance."

"Hawke suspects the order may be corrupted as Alistair has gone into hiding," Ria added.

At this, both Morrigan and Leliana looked grim.

The Herald nodded. "We've agreed to meet Hawke at a cave in Crestwood to talk with Alistair."

"I don't like the sound of this. The whole business doesn't seem right," said Cullen.

"It is the only lead we have," said Leliana.

"Then you must go to Crestwood at once," said Josephine, tapping her quill habitually.

"And we will," said Maxwell, fingering his sword. "But first, I believe our new knight has something to tell us."

Ria felt everyone's eyes on her. "I… wanted to talk about where I come from."

They looked at her expectantly. "You may have noticed that I know some details about our enemy and the events that have occurred. I talk differently, and I don't seem Thedosian. That's because… I'm not."

Everyone but Vivienne and Leliana stared.

"I come from a different world. A world without magic, but technology advanced beyond Thedas. There, I was still a surgeon- I didn't lie about my profession."

"I don't think anyone would have doubted," said Josephine.

"Anyway, in that world, there are… devices called computers, on which you can play games."

 _This is going to sound so stupid…_

"And… uh, I played the Dragon Age series. I finished them, so I know everything that happened in Thedas, right up to Corypheus' death."

At this, Leliana's eyes widened.

There were several "what?"s and "Why didn't you tell us?"s.

"I'm sorry, I was waiting for some of you to trust me. And honestly, I've been running around with different duties constantly… so I haven't had time to catch my breath. Besides, the bad news is that I'm losing some of my memory."

"Your memory?" asked

Cullen shook his head. "Hang on, let me get this straight: you knew what was going to happen after closing the Breach?"

"I had a feeling you would ask me that. No, I lost that information for some reason."

"And what about the Wardens, what do you know of them?" demanded Cassandra.

Ria tried to remember, rubbing her temples. "I know that… there is a false Calling caused by Corypheus that's forcing one of the Wardens to use blood magic to end what they think is the Blight. Alistair refused to follow this, so he's gone into hiding. The rest of them are being sacrificed to summon demons. In the end, we'll be fighting at Adamant Fortress to regain the Wardens."

"And what about the Winter Palace?"

"I was getting to that- I'm not confident in revealing every piece of information because I could be wrong."

"What do you mean?" asked Leliana, frowning.

"What happened at the palace… is not what was _supposed_ to happen. Neither was the attempt on the Herald's life."

Everyone looked alarmed.

"The Inquisitor getting knocked out, everyone drugged and me killing Florianne never happened in the game."

Varric let out a low whistle. "Well… I have to say, you've given us a lot to digest."

"Indeed," said Dorian. "And it is certainly worrying that events may not happen as they should."

Cullen nodded, frowning.

"What about Corypheus? How will we defeat him?" asked Cassandra.

"We will face his army in the Arbor Wilds. He wants to use the Eluvian-"

"You know of the Eluvian?" asked Morrigan, shocked.

"- to reach the Fade, since the Herald has the Anchor on his hand. Yes, I know of it."

"What is this Eluvian?" asked Cullen, struggling to keep up.

"Morrigan, I'm sure, will explain later. We must secure our possession of these and then Corypheus will have no choice but to attack Skyhold. There, we face him and his dragon."

When she said this, they all fell silent.

"If there's anything else that comes to mind, I will tell you."

Cullen nodded slowly. "Thank you. This is valuable information, whether events change or not. I suppose you haven't had much of an opportunity since Haven to catch your breath, let alone explain yourself."

"Yes," said Josephine. "It wouldn't have changed much anyway. Knowing this will just prepare us mentally for what's to come."

"In the meantime, we will ready ourselves for Crestwood," said the Herald, nodding.

Cullen nodded as well. "Until we meet again."

Ria left the room with Maxwell and Cassandra.

The Herald also looked subdued but he patted her on the shoulder and retired to his chamber. As for the Seeker, she looked a little miffed that Ria had revealed this now. A heavy weight had lifted off her chest when she confessed it all. But she was going to have to pray things would happen as they did in the game…

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

After checking on patients and satisfied that the healers had things under control, Ria retired to her chambers. She closed the door behind her and began unbuckling her armour when a pair of hands closed around hers. Ria jumped and whirled around.

"Maker's breath!" she said, doubling over. "You scared me."

The spymaster crossed her arms. "This isn't nearly as frightening as the scene at the Winter Palace."

Ria gave her a rueful look, nodding. "I know… I'm sorry about that. But still..."

Without replying, the woman walked slowly to her, and Ria felt her pulse quicken. Leliana stopped and leaned in close to her face... to unbuckle the straps on her armour. Her deft hands removed it faster than Ria could.

"Thank you," said Ria uncertainly.

The spymaster looked at her. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Ria knew what she was referring to. "I was waiting for the right time. Between all the work and the quests… I kept pushing it back." She ran a hand through her messy hair. "Besides… can you imagine what I would sound like? That this world exists in a game back in my world, that I can predict the future? I tried telling you several times but…"

Leliana considered for a moment. She finally sighed and shook her head. "I'm not happy that you kept this from me and normally I would be upset about it… however, since recent events, it pales in comparison to other matters."

Ria relaxed in relief. "Glad you see it that way."

"And Corypheus… will we really kill him?"

The surgeon nodded. "Yes. We will."

"It's so strange to hear that from you…"

Ria snorted. "I probably sound like a prophet or something."

At that comment, Leliana looked at her seriously. "Maybe you are. The Maker works in mysterious ways."

The knight's gaze shifted to the floor. "You know… I meant to tell you-"

"There's something else you haven't told me?"

"Maker's breath, no! I mean, yes… I just wanted to say that… that I had a dream back at the Winter Palace."

 _Why_ _can I never talk properly in front of her?_

Leliana raised her eyebrows at this. "Go on."

"After Florianne stabbed me-" Leliana grimaced at this. "-and I lost consciousness, I dreamt that I was on a hill somewhere…" she explained the rest in detail. Ria shook her head. "I know this sounds really strange, but-"

"Far from it," said Leliana, who was actually smiling. "This is wonderful. You received… a vision from the Maker! You _met_ the Maker!"

"It could just be a dream."

"The Maker is known to visit his children in dreams sometimes." she paused. "I am ashamed to say that ever since Justinia died, my trust in the Maker has been shaken. But hearing you say this brings joy to my heart. That He has not abandoned us and… He sent you to us. He sent you to me."

At this, Ria's heart melted. "If that's true, then I'm glad I've helped you."

"More than helped," said Leliana, laughing. She drew closer and touched the knight's cheek with soft fingers. "I have not felt so happy in a long time," she said, her Orlesian accent thickening.

Ria smiled gently and took her hand, kissing it. "I would do anything to make you happy."

"So romantic," murmured the woman.

"It's the truth."

A sly smile stretched her red lips. Leliana unbuckled Ria's belt with a practised hand and hooked it around the knight's neck. "Well then. Anything, did you say?" she whispered in her ear.

A shiver ran down her spine. Ria swallowed.

"Uh…"

And then the bard's lips were on hers. Ria felt weak in the knees, felt like she was melting into the ground. Those lips... She felt electric charges up her neck as the woman's fingers brushed her scalp. Still maintaining the kiss, Leliana pushed her to the bed and removed her own armour. Ria all but collapsed on it as Leliana straddled her. The spymaster leaned down for another kiss, tongue asking for entry. Ria pulled down the woman's hood and ran her fingers through the soft hair. Leliana moaned into the kiss. Without thinking, Ria pulled the spymaster to the side and switched positions. She stared down at her.

"By the Maker, you're beautiful."

She leaned down for another kiss. The taste was exquisite- like summer berries.

"Mmm…" Leliana said in pleasure.

Ria kissed that satin cheek, moving down to her neck. When she pressed her lips to the throat, a gasp came from Leliana. At that sound, Ria stopped what she was doing and flushed.

Seeing her expression, the woman giggled. "My, my. What are you thinking?"

"I…"

Leliana stroked Ria's lips with a finger, running it up to her cheeks, then down to her shoulder and to the muscles on her back. Every touch left a trail of fire in its wake.

The surgeon swallowed. Desire clawed at her like a beast, a feral animal.

… _Alright, I have to stop myself here._

She drew back, half straightening. The spymaster beneath her frowned and grasped Ria's collar.

"Not so fast. Where do you think you're going?"

Ria hesitated. The last time this happened, things had turned out badly, with Nikki leaving. Compared to her, Ria wanted this woman so badly. Would she understand?

"Leliana…"

"Yes?" asked the woman, angling her head.

"I've never… licked a lamppost in winter."

There was a long pause as Leliana blinked. Then she burst out laughing. Ria ran a hand through her hair, embarrassed. The spymaster giggled wickedly and wrapped her arms about the knight's neck.

"Oh, you needn't worry about _that_."

"No, you don't understand. I _wouldn't_ go that far…"

Now the woman looked confused. "You have taken vows of chastity?"

"...I believe in abstaining before marriage."

"Oh…"

"In my culture, my family… it's something special. It's proper to have this with the one I'll spend the rest of my life with."

Leliana listened intently, serious. Her eyes regarded Ria's for a time. Then she looked away.

"Then you would not want to be with me."

It was Ria's turn to blink. "I'm sorry?"

"I had no idea you were so innocent. I mean Maker, everything about you is noble. Perfect. But I have done things… despicable things. My body is too…" her voice trailed off and she looked away.

This was not what Ria expected.

"What, no? I... I would never choose anyone but you. But I... have to honour my parents. At least in this," she said, a shadow passing over her face. Ria took a breath. "Back at home, I've done things I'm ashamed of. But with you…" She swallowed. "With you I want to do it right."

Leliana looked a little better. "And…" she asked carefully. "You're not bothered by my past?"

Ria half laughed. "No. Would I be here with you if I was?"

"Oh… of course. You know all about me," said the spymaster with a wry smile.

"Maybe not _everything_."

"But you know about Marjolaine, no? And the Warden?"

"Yes."

"And …" Leliana suddenly looked vulnerable. "Is that true? You would spend the rest of your life… with me?"

Ria gazed down softly. "Yes," she murmured. "I would. I will."

A wonderful smile graced the lady's lips. "You are so romantic," she whispered. There was no teasing this time, those words were soft.

"Believe me, it's only with you," said Ria with a helpless smile. "I've never talked so much before."

"Then I'm glad for the change." Leliana touched a strand of black hair. "I like you talking."

"I usually sound like an idiot- especially in front of you."

"You? An idiot?"

"I'm not perfect. In fact...I've been a very bad person."

The woman shook her head, smiling. "All I can see is a gallant, dashing knight."

"Something must be covering your eyes then," said Ria jokingly, but her eyes were pained.

Leliana made a noise of frustration. "Oh, but that is not the main problem. What am I going to do with you? I don't know how I'm going to _wait_."

Ria flushed and cleared her throat. "Once things settle down…"

"I just want to _take you_ here. Right now," said the former bard, gripping Ria's shirt tightly. She reached up and kissed her, licking her seductively. "You _can_ kiss, can't you?" she asked slyly.

Ria paused, gazing at her seriously. Then she answered by slowly leaning in for a deep kiss, tilting the elegant chin with a finger.

She drew back, smirking slightly at Leliana's unfocused eyes.

"Leliana."

"… yes?"

Ria opened her mouth, then closed it. Then opened it again. "I love you."

Something shifted dramatically in her face. The spymaster cupped her cheek so tenderly that it barely touched the skin.

"Say that again."

"I love you. I'll never leave you."

 _Unless I die…_ said a voice, but she ignored it.

For a moment, the spymaster locked eyes with the surgeon's, gaze soft.

"I love you too, my knight," whispered Leliana, smiling.


	14. Chapter 12: In Your Arms

**CHAPTER 12: In Your Arms**

 _The streets were pouring with rain and the lights were flickering on and off._

 _It was cold and miserable compared to the humid space in the bar. Back there, at least there had been a fire going, never mind the smell of beer and smoke. And vomit. There was always vomit. A car drove past, honking at her, lights blaring._

 _Ria didn't care._

 _She thought back to two years ago, the day when she swore never to visit him again…_

Her father sat in the wheelchair, skeletal and haggard. His stubble was all over his face now, because he refused to raise a hand to do anything anymore.

A blanket covered him to still the tremors that racked his body after a night of profuse sweating.

Ria stood there silently, watching him.

It was so quiet in the room that she could hear the cars beeping outside, as if they were right next to the window.

Her father still didn't look at her, his gaze empty and dead. Then he spoke: "So this is where you work now." His voice was emotionless.

"Yes."

"And are they treating you well?"

"… Yes."

The man nodded. "Good."

There was a long pause before he spoke again.

"Are you happy now…without us?"

Ria stiffened, fists forming. "What kind of question is that?"

"You wanted to be free of us, live your own life. It wasn't good enough for you."

The surgeon took in a deep breath, trying to calm the anger that was already pulsing in her.

"I did my best," she said through gritted teeth.

"When you left… your mother's condition worsened."

That was when she snapped. "I know _full well_ what happened!" she hissed. "And _don't_ talk about it as if I'm to blame."

"She tried to overdose one t-"

"Godammit!" Ria hissed again, trying not to shout. "I've been watching you three, for _all_ this time. You don't need to tell me!"

"I need you to take care of her."

"Oh, so _now_ you care about her?" said Ria, laughing harshly. "After what, fifteen years?"

Her father glared at her. "Now don't you start again."

"How can I not? You _made_ her that way."

"And you _left_."

Ria's face darkened. "I left because of _you_."

At this, her father's face sagged, weary. "I know I haven't been the best father, but… I did the best I could."

"If you mean drinking yourself to death and hitting mum," said Ria, shaking her head. "You have the wrong idea of what's best."

"Your brother is still struggling," said the man, as if he didn't hear her.

The surgeon regarded him with a disgusted expression.

"I can't believe it," she said, looking at the ceiling. "After all these years… you're still the same."

"It doesn't matter. I'm going to die."

Ria took one look at him, feeling her chest constrict. But unlike before… she found that she felt no emotion. No regrets. Only a steeliness around her heart.

Without a word, she strode out the room and slammed it shut. But then she paused, and glared at it.

"I paid for his medical care, old man."

The surgeon walked off to the operating theatre, each footstep echoing the stoniness of her heart… and its resounding emptiness.

 _It was all she could do to focus. Lights were blinding and the stuffy air back at the bar was dizzying. Breathing was difficult, laboured._

 _She knew what was happening but hadn't stopped. Hadn't listened. Christ, she was a doctor. But that didn't stop her, did it?_

 _Everything was blurred and she felt so nauseous. It was too much- she crashed to the wall on her side, sliding down. On the other side of the road, drunken people were walking away. They saw the woman and squinted._

" _Hey! What you doing there?"_

" _Hic, leave 'er mate. She's gone. She's gone for good."_

 _They laughed and left, melting into the shadows. Ria blinked, panting heavily now. The world was spinning and her heart racing. She felt faint… claustrophobic. The last thought on her mind were the last words on her father's letter:_

 _Stay safe. Your mother and I will always love you, even if you don't._

 _And then it was black._

"Ria? Ria!"

She woke up clawing at her throat, gasping for air. A pair of blue eyes swam into view.

"By the Maker, are you alright?"

Pulse slowed, breathing evened out. The room at Skyhold.

Ria closed her eyes again, running a hand down her face. She felt worn, drained. Her hands were shaking.

"Just a dream," she replied stiffly.

 _Just a dream…_

It took a few minutes, but eventually she calmed down. Ria forced a smile on her face as she looked at Leliana.

"A nightmare, is all," she said simply, and lay back down again to stare at the ceiling.

"About what?" asked Leliana, who wasn't ready to let it go.

"Oh, you know. Darkspawn and all that."

"Ria… I know when you're lying."

"Damn."

"Tell me…" said the woman softly, smoothing out her hair.

"You should know the immense power you have over me when you do that," said Ria with a wry smile.

This drew a smile from her. "Then I will use it often."

Ria lay there, silent for a time. "Do you really want to know?" she asked, almost in a whisper.

The spymaster's lips parted, suddenly aware of the gravity in the room. She regarded Ria for a moment before replying: "Yes."

"It may… change your view of me."

Leliana's eyes softened. "Whatever it is… I am here for you," she said, smoothing out Ria's hair again.

The surgeon drew in a shuddering breath. "As I said before: I'm not a good person. I probably thought I was… until things went wrong."

Leliana listened patiently.

"A few years ago, after my father died… I fell into bad habits."

Her lover gazed at her with compassion. "You were going through a difficult time."

"It doesn't justify what I did- I lied, betrayed, I hurt a lot of people."

"Ria… I have done the same."

"Then we're in the same boat. I… I wasn't a nice person."

"We all have these times."

"No. I was a monster. A demon. I just wanted to kill everything in sight. And I couldn't take it… I just couldn't," she said, choking as she remembered the blurry nights, the people she called 'friends'. "I was involved with the wrong people, I took drugs, gambled, got drunk every night. One day… one day I poisoned myself and nearly died."

The spymaster's eyes widened. She wasn't expecting this.

"What hurt the most was knowing that it was _my_ fault my father died."

"What do you mean?"

"I froze up. I just stood in theatre… I just stood there while blood spilled everywhere: it was in his throat, his stomach, the rest of his abdomen. And I just stood there with my scalpel like a _fool_."

"Oh, Ria…"

The surgeon closed her eyes in pain. She covered them with a hand, as if that would make her blind to her memories.

"My father and I… we weren't on the best of terms. He was a heavy drinker, and I never had good memories of him. In fact, I _hated_ him. But maybe it was because I could see myself in him…"

In her mind, she could almost hear her mother tutting. _You are so like your father, Ria. Such a fiery temper._

Ria laughed humourlessly. "After he died… he left a letter saying he was sorry. That he didn't expect my forgiveness. He also said several things that I couldn't make heads or tails out of. But basically, he said he and mother still loved me. And I..." she said, starting to sob bitterly. "I swore at my dad, left him alone in the room just days before the operation. I was so angry. I was so angry…I hurt him… I hurt him before he died."

Ria gritted her teeth as the tears ran down her temples and a tremor racked her body. A hand pulled her own rigid hand away from her eyes. Leliana pressed a kiss to Ria's forehead and cradled her in her arms.

And they stayed that way for hours. The Orlesian held her tightly, loving her, accepting her. It was dark outside, not yet dawn, but Ria felt the room lightening in her embrace.

Eventually, her sobs died down as she drifted back into sleep.

Seeing the peaceful face, Leliana kissed her again on the lips.

"Sleep well, my love."

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The air was cool in the morning, but refreshingly so.

There was even the hint of a flowery scent as people rushed about, brushing past plants. Birds sang greetings in melodies of their own. How long had it been since she last noticed these things? The sky, the trees, the animals. The colours, the smells and tastes. Leliana had been blind and deaf to the world for years. She remembered the silly girl who joined the Wardens in their quest, stammering about a vision, faith and love. But had she been silly? No. The bard had been happy then, and grateful. Grateful for her life.

After dark times in Marjolaine's shadow, she knew how to appreciate the simple things. And when Kallian died, she had wanted to follow her into the void.

And now…

Now she loved again. Her lover was strong, righteous, kind and faithful. But she was also vulnerable, dark and brooding. Leliana found she didn't mind the contradiction. She was such a deep character, carrying a tragic past that drew her in. Ria's heart was a maelstrom of emotions- one moment mechanical and serious, the next unbelievably kind and gentle. Like swift clouds passing by.

In younger days, the spymaster was infatuated- no, _worshipped_ her bardmaster. The older woman had seduced her into submission. Oh, she knew everything there was to know and mystified Leliana with her beauty and talents. But this surgeon… she was even more beautiful in her eyes. So intelligent, so quiet and gentle. So knightly.

 _Maker_ , Leliana thought with a smile. _I probably sound like a love struck fool._

And she kept revisiting that night in Orlais again. The surgeon's hand on her back, holding the spymaster's other hand, gazing at her with a look that melted her on the spot. As though Leliana was the only woman in the world for her.

The scene was too perfect to be true.

As she was lost in these thoughts on the balcony, a pair of hands slid around her waist and crossed at the front. A comforting warmth pressed against her back. _Ria._

The smell of fresh cotton and soap drifted to her.

Ria kissed the side of her neck, the sensation sending a pleasant shiver down its length.

"Good morning," her lover murmured.

"Careful," said Leliana, laughing. "People can see."

"You're right," said Ria, pausing. Then: "But who cares."

The spymaster laughed again and turned her head around this time, capturing those lips in a kiss.

Ria's long lashes curved down. The kiss deepened and their tongues entwined. Leliana smiled into it, relishing the taste.

When they pulled apart for air, Ria gave her a wolfish grin. It transformed her face so much that the spymaster marvelled. She looked even younger, boyish. A strand of black hair fell loose against her eyes.

"You know, you should grow your hair longer."

The surgeon's lips twisted. "I prefer short hair."

"But it's such a waste."

"It's already longer than I want it to be. I look like Harry Potter in the 4th movie."

"Who's-"

"Never mind. It's a character in a book."

"Alright," said Leliana, laughing.

They were about to lean into another kiss when a voice came from below.

"Hey! Lovebirds! It's time to go!" said Varric, grinning from ear to ear.

Ria's smile slipped off. She looked so sad and disappointed that the spymaster drew her close to kiss her cheek. "Stay safe, come back to me," Leliana whispered in Ria's ear.

The surgeon nodded, smiling softly.

Maker, those eyes could melt gold.

Then the workman in her snapped into action- she could see it in Ria's face. She was a natural soldier.

Ria straightened, saluted her and went back into the room again. Leliana watched from the balcony as her lover packed her things methodically. She helped with the armour, and looked at the knight in awe after the last buckle.

With her helmet under one arm, silver sword on hip, lazurite armour and darkly beautiful face, Ria Lewis looked like a hero from the tales of bards.

And the lovers gazed at each other- knight and spymaster.

"For the will of the Maker," said Ria, eyes calm.

"For the will of the Maker," agreed Leliana, nodding.

Ria reached out and held her hand for a moment, before letting go. She jammed the helmet on her head and turned, leaving the bedchamber.

Leliana stared in the direction for a while before returning to the balcony.

She looked down at the ground, where the heroes of the Inquisition gathered. Trevelyan waited at the front, his sling gone. The rest of them turned at the sound of clanking armour as Ria strode out. Seeing the confident strides made her stop breathing. _So like Kallian…_

They greeted the new knight, raising their weapons high. People around them cheered, coming to wave farewell. Ria swung up onto her horse, nudging it with her heels. It started off at a trot, heading for the gates. Leliana watched as they left, heart aching like nothing she had felt before.

At the last moment, Ria glanced back, raising a hand in farewell to her.

Leliana raised her right arm.

Then… she drew her hood up, staring off into the distance.

"To work then," she murmured.


	15. Chapter 13: An Old Friend

**CHAPTER 13: An Old Friend**

Crestwood was under the wrath of angry clouds that stretched for miles. Torrential rain poured down on the ground like whips on a back. Dark houses were dotted around, foreboding… unwelcoming. A flash of electricity lit up the sky.

"Well… this looks positively delightful," commented Vivienne dryly over the wind.

"Yes, I think I will restock my wardrobe when we return to Skyhold," said Dorian, moustache twitching.

Ria had expected this, so everyone had anticipated such a weather. But in reality, it was even more miserable than she thought. Her clothes had already been soaked travelling here, and it looked like she would be soaked to her _bones_ in this storm. By the end of it all, they would be wet dogs walking the land.

Trevelyan sighed and urged his steed forward. The rest of them followed, looking more miserable with each step. They trotted down the stone path in silence. Ria was scanning the village when she noticed movement she hadn't seen before through the downpour. A scream pierced the air, and the Inquisition exchanged glances. Swords hissed out of scabbards and a deep hum sounded as the mages readied their staffs.

Ria's heart thudded in anticipation of the battle as they galloped forwards. By the time they reached the entrance, it was clear they would have to fight on foot.

They were everywhere.

Undead terrorized the villagers. Skeletal limbs hacked at her- she parried, dodged and decapitated. Vivienne took out an archer meters away with electricity. Trevelyan knocked one over with his shield and sliced its torso. The others were also likewise engaged.

Ria didn't think as she ploughed through her enemies, getting into the rhythm of slashing, parrying, manoeuvring and shielding. Right, left, front, back. Eventually, the numbers dwindled to about four. Four leering Undead and Ria was the closest. They charged at her. Quickly she knocked out the far right, horizontally sliced two of their torsos and parried the last blow. The others shouted their approval when she beheaded the skeleton.

"Nice work!" said the Inquisitor, running to her. He wiped the rain from his eyes but sighed when more rain dripped in. "I think that's all of them. We should continue to the cave."

Everyone agreed and splashed back to their horses.

"Urgh!" said Vivienne in disgust as mud coated her robes.

Ria shook her head. "You should wear something else next time."

"My dear, there will always be a price for good fashion."

"Which is why I rarely pay attention to it."

Vivienne gave her a look. "You're going to have to, if you stay with Leliana. The girl takes it seriously."

" _That's_ certainly true," said Varric, laughing.

"Maybe after the war's over."

They continued along the road to the south east, and encountered some more Undead and highwaymen. They weren't difficult to fight, and the mages blasted the last of them with inferno.

Solas shielded his eyes from the rain as he looked. "There, I see it."

"The cave?" asked Trevelyan.

Sure enough, there was a gloomy opening partially hidden by a rock wall. At its entrance a banner with a skull flapped in the wind.

"That's… friendly," said Ria.

"I'll say," said Varric. "This place gives me the creeps."

"Well, I can see Hawke there. Let us go and meet her," said Cassandra.

Marian Hawke was leaning on the cave wall but straightened as they approached. She nodded.

"You're here."

"Yeah, some Undead monsters and skeletons but we're fine," said Varric.

"Yes… they tend to show up unannounced," said Hawke.

"In any case, we should get moving," said Maxwell, already walking ahead.

The group walked deeper into the cave, footsteps echoing in the unfamiliar silence. They arrived at the end of it, where the passage opened up to small area.

A blonde man in Grey Warden armour stood waiting, his back to them. Ria already knew who it was, but her chest swelled in recognition. _That's strange… why am I so happy to see him?_

Alistair turned to meet them. He first saw the Inquisitor, his face grave. Then his eyes slipped to Ria, and he did a double take. The Warden stared at her.

"So… you are the Warden contact," said Trevelyan.

Alistair took the offered hand and shook it. "I am. And you must be the Inquisitor, the one they call Herald of Andraste."

"Yes."

"My name is Alistair- I was a Warden in the fifth Blight. And your companions…?"

"This is Seeker Cassandra, Ser Ria, Vivienne, Dorian, Varric and Blackwall."

"I see…" said Alistair, angling his head at Ria's name. "Well, I won't delay any longer. The situation is dire- the Wardens are listening to a false Calling."

Trevelyan nodded. "We know."

"You do?" asked the Warden, taken aback.

"Yes, we'll explain later."

Instead, the Inquisitor asked Alistair some additional questions until he was satisfied he knew everything about the situation. The answers confirmed what Ria had told them.

"And you want us to meet at a Tevinter ritual tower in the Western Approach," said Maxwell. "Is that correct?"

Alistair crossed his arms. "How do you know all this?"

The Inquisitor gestured at Ria. "Our surgeon… now knight, can predict the future."

"A surgeon knight?" said Alistair incredulously.

Ria shrugged. "Somehow it happened."

"And you seem to know everything I was going to tell you about. Who are you?"

"Yes, I would like to know as well," said Hawke, crossing her own arms.

Trevelyan gave her an encouraging look.

"This will be difficult to believe but… I'm from another world."

"Okay…" said Alistair, blinking. "So far, not that bad."

"And in that world, Thedas and all of this… is inside a game."

This sentence had a profound effect on the two people.

"Hang on a minute," said Alistair, laughing. "Are you… serious?"

"It _looks_ like she is," said Hawke.

"I'm actually as confused as you are, to be honest. I shouldn't even be here," said Ria, giving an apologetic smile.

It took them some more convincing, but eventually they accepted it.

"Well, you don't seem to be lying," said Hawke. "And there's no other explanation offered so I guess we'll take it."

"Excellent, I thought-"

"You were full up on crazy?" asked Ria, raising an eyebrow.

The man's expression changed. He seemed speechless for a few minutes before saying: "You know, you sound like someone I knew long ago."

"You mean Kallian Tabris?"

"…Yes."

"I've heard that said to me before."

Varric spoke up: "Well, this is news to me."

"She is similar to the former Warden Tabris?" asked Cassandra in surprise.

"Not just similar," said Alistair softly. There was an emotion in his gaze that made Ria uncomfortable. "It was a pleasure to meet you Alistair," said Ria quickly. "But I believe we're short on time. We should head to the Western Approach quickly."

His brown eyes regarded her for a time. Alistair finally nodded. "Let's go."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

No matter what happened in the game, Ria was hopeful they could at least prevent this one.

Sand watered her eyes as they hacked and burned down a giant lizard, the wind spraying her with more particles every time. They were facing the Ritual Tower. She couldn't remember the name of the enemy but knew that he would flee. It was their plan to change this outcome if possible. Hawke and Alistair straightened up. Together, the Inquisition and their new allies walked up the steps.

A man with black hair and a snivelling expression awaited on the far side.

"Ah, Alistair. How good of you to join us!"

Ria saw him falter at the sight of the enslaved Wardens, their gazes blank and lifeless. But he had been warned. Alistair glared.

"You can't continue this Erimond, we know you serve Corypheus."

 _Erimond, that was his name._

As the Warden distracted the lord, Ria nodded to Vivienne and Dorian. Secretly, they cast a spell of paralysis on Erimond. During the conversation, the man smirked and tried to shift his feet. The smirk slipped off. He glared.

"You… Wardens, kill them!"

"Not a very impressive enemy, is he?" commented Ria to Varric.

"If that's the only line he can come up with," replied Varric, grinning.

And the fight began.

Mages hurled ice at them, and Ria had to dodge several times. It was a new experience for her, dealing with magic. Twice, she stepped on their freezing zones and stood paralyzed. Rage demons also rose from the ground, charging at her with flaming fists. In a moment of panic, she wondered how her sword would do any damage against a monster made of fire. It turned out she didn't need to worry- the silver sword felled it like a tree.

She turned around, felt her stomach lurch when she saw Varric and the Inquisitor on the ground.

 _Oh, great._

She rushed to them, wincing as a fist of ice slammed into her right arm. A hail of sharp crystals ripped at it. Ria growled and whirled around to throw a dagger. The mage crumpled. Satisfied, she went to kneel by her friends. Airway clear, breathing, stable circulation. They were just knocked out.

Switching from surgeon to knight, she ran again to join the fray. Cassandra and Alistair killed another mage while Vivienne froze a Rage demon. Dorian, in the meantime, was still holding Erimond in paralysis. She saw the strain on his face to maintain the spell. Blackwall and Hawke were engaged with some of the Wardens.

Ria sprinted to the lord's side, holding her sword to his neck. Erimond stiffened but laughed, surprising her.

"Go ahead. It will be in vain. You see, Clarel will continue with the Ritual regardless of my death."

"It doesn't matter," Ria hissed. "You're coming with us."

"I won't tell you anything, you know."

The Wardens and mages stopped to stare. Ria's companions took the opportunity to slay them.

"You can stop your little game," said Vivienne. "We will be marching to Adamant Fort, with you as prisoner."

"Have it your way," said Erimond with a nasty smile.

Ria decided she'd had enough. She banged him on the head with her pommel.

Everyone wiped their weapons and took the poultices that Ria handed out. And once Trevelyan and Varric gained consciousness, they prepared to leave.

Blackwall slung Erimond over his shoulder. Ria wondered how they were going to carry him to Skyhold.

"He will be tied up in the saddle," reassured Cassandra. "With Blackwall, of course."

"Thank goodness."

"Impressive swordplay," said Alistair as he joined them.

"Thank you."

"Where did you learn your techniques from?"

"Commander Cullen."

At this, Alistair raised an eyebrow. "The former Templar? And how is he?"

"I'd say he's far up the ladder now since the circle tower," said Ria with a smile.

He nodded. "I have heard of his influence."

"You might have also heard he's still a prude then."

"Is he now?" asked the Warden with a grin. "I guess it's a Templar thing." Then his face changed. "And how's Leliana?"

Ria rubbed the back of her neck. "She's… she's fine."

"Really? I mean, I haven't seen her for years now. I just hope she's alright with…"

"The Warden's death?"

"Yeah…"

"Don't worry about that, Warden," said Varric, who had been listening to their conversation. "She's been smiling and giggling again ever since the surgeon came along."

"Varric," chided Vivienne. "I believe these are private matters."

Hawke bounced her eyebrows. "Now _this_ sounds like juicy gossip. The last I saw of her, the spymaster was as cold as ice."

"Trust us, Lady Marian," said Dorian. "The ice has been melting under the sun."

"Oh…" said Alistair, taking in Ria's blush. He sounded disappointed, but quickly smiled. "I suppose I should congratulate you then. She's a sweet girl at heart, just… a little shaken by recent events."

Ria nodded.

Then he hesitated before asking: "And… what do you think of her?"

"She has the most beautiful soul I've ever seen." The words came to her easily, to her surprise.

Hawke whistled. "How romantic."

"Well what about you, Hawke?" said Varric slyly. "How's Isabela doing?"

It was Hawke's turn to look awkward. She cleared her throat.

"She's doing just fine."

"Alright, guys," called the Inquisitor from a distance away. "We need to travel quickly."

The companions stopped talking and ran to catch up.

"Do you think he's saying that because he thinks we're talking about him and Cassandra?" whispered Varric to Ria.

Ria smiled. "Maybe?"

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Back in Skyhold, Cullen and Josephine joined the spymaster at the top of the stairs to the throne room. Even there, Josie scribbled notes on her parchment. The sound was starting to get irritating.

"Josie, for the last time, please…" she sighed.

Josephine looked sheepish. "Sorry, just one more note and I'll be done." She spent another minute on it and closed it shut. "There, are you satisfied?"

Leliana nodded distractedly, pacing back and forth, hands behind her back.

"Leliana, you've been doing that for half an hour now. _Relax_ ," said the Antivan. "She will be here. Your agents sighted them, remember?"

The Orlesian sighed. "I know… it's just… I keep thinking about Haven, and then Orlais-"

"Oh, you worry too much! If your scouts have seen her, they've seen her."

"Yes," said Cullen. "I agree with Josephine. Ria is quite capable of defending herself now. Unless she is unarmoured and unarmed, I doubt she will sustain a serious injury."

"I suppose you're right…"

She tried to look at the people of Haven, the goings on and her agents scattered about. Anything to distract her.

And then…

"It's the Herald! They're back!" shouted a man excitedly.

Soldiers ran forward to open the gates and people gathered around to welcome them. Leliana felt her heart thudding in her chest.

There was nothing at first- no sound, no sign of horses. But then she heard the faint thumping of hooves on wood and the Herald emerged on his chestnut destrier. Behind him were Vivienne, Cassandra, Varric, Blackwall with an unconscious man, and then… it was her lover. Leliana let out the breath she'd been holding. Ria rode in her saddle, covered in dust and blood, but seemed unharmed. The spymaster resisted the urge to run to her. It felt like eons before the group reached the stables. Even from a distance, she felt Ria's eyes on her. They approached the stairs and Cullen nodded in approval.

"Welcome back. It's good to see you all unharmed… and with a hostage, to boot."

"Is that the enemy you mentioned?" Leliana asked Ria in her spymaster tone.

She saw Ria fighting down a smile. "Yes, my lady. His name is Erimond."

Someone in the group caught her gaze. "Alistair? My, you haven't changed since we parted."

The light haired Warden grinned. "Good to see you too, Leliana."

"We will have to catch up soon. I'm sure you have been through a lot. And… Marian Hawke. Our paths cross again."

The electric blue eyes danced in amusement. "Indeed. I see you are now spymaster."

"Yes… my days as Left Hand are over, I'm afraid."

"Right," said Josie. "I'm sure you are all weary from the quest. You should retire to your chambers before we discuss our next step in the war room."

Everyone murmured their agreement, faces relieved. As they all dispersed, Ria waited at the bottom of the stairs, crossing her arms. When they had gone, the knight ascended to Leliana's level. Looking at those dark eyes again, the Orlesian's heart trembled. A small smile stretched Ria's lips but her gaze said everything Leliana wanted to know.

"How are you?" the surgeon asked.

"I'm…" _I've been waiting for you every day._ "… fine," she said lamely.

"Good," said Ria, reaching out to touch Leliana's cheek. Then she took her hand and led her in the direction of her chamber. The spymaster frowned as she noticed she kept her right arm to the side.

When they entered, Leliana closed the door behind them and instantly pulled Ria's head into a desperate kiss. And it _was_ desperate. They had never been far apart for so long before. The other woman weakened. Leliana smiled inwardly.

"Mmf…" said Ria, her arms enclosing the Orlesian… then she winced.

Leliana drew back, frowning again. "You're hurt."

"It's nothing," the surgeon said. "Trust me."

"No, it's not nothing. Come here, let me take that off."

Ria rolled her eyes but didn't say anything when Leliana undid the straps. The shoulder guards came off and she rolled the sleeve up. She sucked in her breath. It was _not_ nothing. A mottled, ugly bruise coloured the whole upper arm, and there were multiple deep gashes with ointment slathered on hastily. Even with it on, the wounds were weeping blood. She glared at Ria, who cleared her throat.

"There were worse injuries in the group."

Leliana shook her head. "No excuses. Now go and take a bath."

"Alright, alright."

She watched the knight go, feeling slightly foolish.

 _What's wrong with me? I've seen injuries like this before… but I'm so worried when it's her._

After a while, Ria came back, holding her arm with a grimace.

"The hot water stung," she explained.

Leliana nodded. "Now take that shirt off, and let me dress the wound."

"M-my shirt?" said Ria, blushing adorably.

"Yes. Do you have a problem?" she asked innocently.

The surgeon sat down on the bed and took the shirt off. When she did, Leliana felt desire creep up on her. Maker, the body was slim but pleasantly muscled. Not bulky, but enough to be athletic. She nearly laughed as Ria looked away self-consciously. Leliana dipped the cloth into the bowl and started wiping the gashes. The surgeon frowned with the pain but didn't make a sound.

 _Did she run through hail?_

She held the arm with one hand, feeling the smooth muscled skin underneath. After cleaning the wounds, she slathered on some potent healing salve. She put on some gauze and bandaged the arm neatly.

"There… that wasn't too bad, was it?" she asked teasingly. Ria smiled shyly.

That expression was just too much. Leliana felt her hands automatically move to the shoulder, then the chest down to taut abdominal muscles. As she looked up, she saw her own desire mirrored in Ria's eyes. But then the surgeon looked away, swallowing.

Leliana smiled, turning the woman's chin to her. "Don't make me wait too long, my love."

"This is harder than I thought."

The spymaster laughed, leaning close. "Oh, I will make it very, _very_ hard for you."

Ria shook her head, smiling. "Then we'll have to defeat Corypheus soon won't we?"

" _Very_ soon," agreed Leliana.


	16. Chapter 14: The Siege of Adamant

**CHAPTER 14: The Siege of Adamant**

The sound of metal echoed everywhere and forges burned with fire day and night. Soldiers were here and there, sharpening swords or practising. Cullen oversaw all the preparation, his red cape flapping around the corners of the castle. Ria was given command of her own men, supervising their last days of training before they left for Adamant Fortress.

Ability wise, they were proficient enough, but she made sure they knew the foes they would be up against. As for her medical duties, there weren't many patients to see- most of the serious cases had been post Haven. Now, all she had to deal with were minor injuries and some common illnesses.

Meanwhile, the Inner Circle was also readying for battle. Varric was buying more bolts, upgrading Bianca. Solas, Vivienne and Dorian were brushing up on healing and fire magic. Ria had mentioned fighting a Pride demon so they were warming up for that. The Inquisitor, Blackwall, Iron Bull and Cassandra were sparring with each other daily. Ria joined them most of the time, but found that her different duties were making her run from one end of the castle to the other.

Today, she was thoroughly exhausted. Her men were either sparring or practising archery. The surgeon returned to her bedchamber, feeling filthy with her body slick with sweat. She filled the tub with hot water and tossed her clothes in the basket. With a deep sigh, Ria lowered herself into it, taking care not to dip her right arm in.

As she relaxed, Ria thought about everything that had happened so far- from waking up in the Hinterlands to meeting Erimond. It was all so crazy. And yet… for the first time in her life, it all felt _right_.

Like she was destined to be here.

She used to think that working in the hospital was her destiny. Medicine had looked so amazing. And then she saw the misery in that place: disillusionment, competition, arrogance, desensitization, depression, pain… there was no life in that place. Sometimes she wondered why she bothered. But here, maybe it was because people knew to appreciate life more, being in the midst of a war. There was gratitude, there was hope, there was laughter, there was strength. There was love. And she'd left these behind, long ago.

Since rehab, she had tried to pick herself up again. But always, those voices returned…

 _You'll never recover… you think you're strong, but you've always been weak._

 _Attention seeker…_

 _Pathetic… good for nothing._

 _Murderer…_

There was nothing to live for. Not even her family had been able to bring her out of the shell. But she had friends, real friends. Not people who wanted to use her status, her influence. She had friends who cared about her: Varric, who was always ready for a joke. Vivienne who was wise, loyal. Josie, who was like a sister to her. Dorian, sincere behind that flamboyance. Cassandra, who pretended to be a stone but, was actually a marshmallow inside. The Inquisitor, who was now like a big brother… she could go on about these people.

And Leliana…

Ria had never been so drunk on love. There was no one like her before: ten times more beautiful than any of them. At times she was cool, calm and charismatic. Other times she flirted like a master: sweet, playful and irresistible.

She could be with this woman forever.

And yet… sometimes she thought of home. Of her brother, her mother and Jager. They would be waiting for her there. Would they notice her absence? How long had she been gone for? And would she ever be able to return?

And if she could return… would she?

Ria thought of Leliana and shook her head. No, she knew she would never return.

The surgeon lay there for a long time before the water cooled down. She left the bathtub and clothed herself. When she came back to the room, Leliana was standing by the window, staring out. And Ria stood there, watching in awe as the light of dusk streamed in. The sun set the red hair aflame, casting a celestial glow on her face.

Sensing her presence, the spymaster turned in her direction, smiling. The water dripped from Ria's hair as she stayed there, looking stupid. Heart in mouth, she walked to her lover. Transfixed by something in Ria's gaze, the spymaster's lips parted. Then Ria wrapped her in her arms. She felt Leliana relax in the embrace and return it. Her hands gently held Ria's back.

"My love… is something wrong?"

Ria laughed softly. "No."

"Then-"

"Just stay like this… just for a while."

The knight surgeon buried her face in that gorgeous hair, inhaling the scent. A scent she would engrave in her heart. She didn't keep track of how long they stood there like that, but when she finally drew back, the sun was gone. Leliana lit the candle, turning to her lover. She looked at her strangely.

"Ria?"

"Leliana… are you sure you weren't sent from above?"

At this, the spymaster giggled. "Oh, now she's getting flirty. When did you get such a gilded tongue?"

"No, really," said Ria seriously. "It doesn't make sense…I don't deserve you."

Leliana looked surprised. "I would say the same about _you_. My love, you are perfect. How can anyone deserve you?" She made a face. "Those offers in Orlais were proof enough. I was so jealous when they eyed you like a prize horse."

The surgeon raised an eyebrow. "Really? Well that's funny, I'm sure I saw all the gentlemen gaping at you coming up the stairs."

" _Only_ gentlemen?" asked the spymaster.

Ria laughed, touching her soft hair. "Everyone. Everyone was watching. You were a goddess."

The Orlesian laid a hand on her left shoulder, leaning in close. "But there was only one woman she wanted that night," she said, voice sultry and low.

Drawing back, she looked at Ria from under her eyelashes. And Ria kissed her softly. It was the sweetest she ever tasted. Leliana's lashes fluttered. A light shone in her eyes.

"No one has ever kissed me like that," she said quietly.

"I love you…" murmured Ria, heart burning with emotion.

At this declaration, a spark appeared in the spymaster's eyes. The next thing Ria knew, she was pushed roughly to the wall, lips crashing into hers. There was barely enough time to react. The Orlesian's kiss was so intense that Ria felt her insides liquefying. She tried to embrace the woman but Leliana's grip was like iron. Keeping her pinned to the wall, lips trailed downward, kissing Ria's neck and collarbone. Leliana's right hand slipped under the shirt, touching bare skin.

Ria gasped at the contact, a shudder running through her. That hand… it moved around expertly, giving her so much pleasure she felt embarrassed and giddy at the same time. Leliana's hips grinded against hers, and Ria groaned helplessly. She panted heavily with each brush of skin, eyes widening in places where Leliana's teeth grazed her. Both of them were breathing hard now, and Leliana seemed to control herself. A drop of water fell on Ria's lips. With a wicked gleam in her eye, the woman licked it and kissed her lips softly. Then she leaned her head on Ria's shoulder.

"Damn… what was _that_?" breathed Ria, still dazed.

Leliana looked guilty, but a smile curved her mouth. "I'm sorry… I shouldn't have. I keep forgetting about your abstinence."

"This isn't right… but I'm losing myself," said Ria helplessly. She stroked the woman's cheek with a finger. "Stop doing this to me."

The spymaster laughed. "Alright, it was a moment of weakness. Besides, I'm not the only one to blame. You're making me want more."

"We really shouldn't do this," said the surgeon weakly, running a hand through her hair.

"Stop doing that," said Leliana, grabbing her wrist. "It makes you more desirable."

"Ok, now you're just finding things to blame," Ria said, laughing.

The woman laughed with her, eyes sparkling. And in that moment, she was so beautiful that it ached to look at her.

 _I will never leave you._

She must have said it out loud, because Leliana's lips parted. She cupped Ria's cheek and looked at her with tender eyes.

"Nor I."

And the lovers spent the night in each other's arms, dreaming of good days to come.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Get to the battlements, quickly!" bellowed Cullen, ash and blood on his face.

"Swords at the ready, eyes on the foe!" shouted Ria, sliding her sword out harshly. She raised it in high in the air. "To victory!"

Her soldiers banged on their shields, cheering. "To victory!" they roared.

The rest of the army heard the sound and echoed the words. Cullen raised his eyebrows in approval. They were going to need all the morale they could get.

A sea of dark green charged up the stairs, with the archers on the ground. Darkspawn fell from the tops with ghastly screams. Hundreds of steeled feet clanged, swords flashed in the air and arrows fell like rain. As Ria killed creature after creature, demon after demon, she glimpsed her friends progressing.

She gave a fierce war cry, splitting the Despair demon in two. Her men followed, surrounding their leader. They shouted loudly, metal glinting in the light. As they slashed at the monsters and let the blood flow, Ria felt pride swell in her chest. At the same time, she felt vengeance pulse through her veins as people died around her. Damon, Leane, Aidan, Matthas…

With a snarl, she struck the lesser terror with the pommel. The blow was so hard that it pierced its chest into the pericardium. Green fluid leaked out as it toppled to the ground. She strode forward, hacking at each monster so hard they died in a river of their own blood and gore.

Quickly, Ria and her men cleared a path on the ramparts. All around, she saw Grey Wardens fighting and dying. The knight joined the fray, switching to a two handed axe. She gave a wide swing, slicing through bone and flesh with satisfying _whumps_. Five Darkspawn died around her. Gore splattered her helmet and face. Wardens hacked and slashed at their enemies, willpower renewed. Her own men flooded in, overwhelming the monsters.

It was a grim dance of axes and swords, blood issuing from gaping wounds. Screams from men and monsters. Snaps of breaking bone. Gurgles of the dying.

Her heavy armour protected her, but enemies were everywhere. She felt the blow from a Rage demon as its fists drove into her back. A sharp pain lanced down her muscles and she gasped. It died at the hands of one of her men, but Ria stayed kneeling on the ground. She gritted her teeth and regained her breath. With a growl, she buried her axe in the belly of a demon.

It wasn't long before the area was clear, and the Wardens thanked them.

"Thank us when all of them are dead," she said. "For now, leave this place."

They exchanged glances but did as she commanded.

On the other side, she saw the flash of blue light as Despair demons surrounded Trevelyan. A giant of a creature loomed over his companions. They were having trouble.

At the same time, she looked to her left to see more Darkspawn coming their way. Her men ran to meet them, and Ria stood there, torn. She quickly estimated the number: eight monsters. She had twenty soldiers left. Meanwhile, the Despair demons were preventing the Inquisitor from getting anywhere near the Pride Demon. All the mages could do was to fire ranged shots and try to burn it up. Ria made her decision.

She left her men and joined the Inner Circle.

"Ria! Did you leave your men?" asked Vivienne accusingly.

"No time, what do you need?"

"A way to kill those things," said Varric.

"They won't-stay-put," said Vivienne, missing the Despair demons with her firebolts.

The Inquisitor and Cassandra were trying to dodge the blasts of ice. Blackwall was swinging his sword at them but they kept flying away. Solas and Dorian were pelting the Pride demon with feeble shots and making freeze zones.

"You're barely doing any damage," said Ria, shaking her head. "Stop attacking the Pride demon and take down the Despair demons."

" _Stop_ attacking the Pride demon?" asked Dorian incredulously. "I mean look at that thing- that's clearly our priority."

"They," the knight said, pointing at the Inquisitor and the Seeker. "Aren't getting anywhere. Knock the Despair demons out and Cassandra or Trevelyan can reel them in."

Vivienne sighed. "We will try. But it's not going to be easy."

After several attempts, the Despair demons were both chained and pulled towards the group. Ria wasted no time in slashing their throats with Blackwall. The Pride demon, however, was now unfrozen and laughed its evil laugh.

The mages started attacking again but its defence was up. Before joining them, Ria had had an idea. But she wasn't sure if it was going to work… she hoped demon anatomy was similar to a human's. The knight raced forward with Trevelyan, Cassandra and Blackwall. She tried to get past its hide but it was no use. It was too strong.

"Not working!" she yelled. "Cut the back of its knee!"

"The back of it's-?"

"Yes!"

This proved harder than she thought because a) the Pride Demon kept turning around and b) it struck the ground with its fists, making them fall. Ria staggered up for the fifth time and looked up as the demon prepared to squash her.

There was nowhere else to escape.

She rolled through between its legs. Then, without pausing, she plunged her sword into its popliteal fossa.

The effect was much bigger than she expected.

Blood fountained out of the space and pooled on the stones. It roared, kneeled and fell forwards.

"By Andraste, you did it!" exclaimed Cassandra, running to her.

"It just takes a bit of thinking," said Ria.

"Good job Ria." said Maxwell, wiping his face.

"Right, now that _that's_ out of the way, we can move forward," said Vivienne. "By the way, Ria dear, shouldn't you head back to your men?"

"Yes…" Ria turned to see her group, and was relieved to find them waiting for her. They motioned with their hands to continue without them.

Ria wasn't really sure of this but Cassandra seemed to agree. She laid a hand on her shoulder.

"Let them fend for themselves. This part of the battlements is now safer. We must press on."

"Welcome to the team again, kid," said Varric, grinning.

The surgeon decided to follow them.

Along the way, they encountered several more groups of Darkspawn fighting Grey Wardens. The Inquisitor's group helped them out before passing through the outer walls. They met with Alistair and Hawke, who had brought Erimond. On the battlements, they spotted Clarel with her staff. The rest of the Wardens were gathered together as well.

The close shaven Warden stood there defiantly, glaring at them. Together, the Inquisitor, Alistair and Blackwall tried to talk sense into the woman. It seemed she was listening to the explanation and there was a stir among the Wardens. They showed her Erimond, bound and laughing like a maniac.

"He has confessed his loyalty to Corypheus," said Trevelyan. "The Calling you hear is false, caused by the Elder One, who plans to destroy all of Thedas."

"Corypheus?" asked Clarel incredulously. "But… he's dead."

"He speaks the truth!" boomed Blackwall.

"And who are you?" the Warden demanded.

"You may not know me," said Blackwall, crossing his arms. "But you may have heard my name. Like you, I've given my life to the Grey Wardens. The first time I put this armour on, I felt like I belonged. Like I was part of something honourable. I know how good that feels. But fighting and dying here today won't stop the Blight."

There was a disturbed murmur in the crowd.

"Many of you have already allied with the enemy. There is deception at work that will shame our order. Bring honour to the Wardens and stop this madness!"

Alistair nodded. "If you do not, you will be serving the very Archdemon you swore to destroy!"

Now there was a murmur in the crowd.

"Come now, Clarel. You don't _truly_ believe them, do you? These people would say anything to shake your confidence." said Erimond.

The Warden- Commander frowned. "A while ago, I would have denied it. But their words do raise my suspicion."

"Bah! Do what you want, it doesn't matter. Lord Corypheus will rule over Thedas!"

Before anyone could react, the Magister suddenly broke free of Hawke's grip, elbowing her in the stomach. And then… there was a blood-curdling roar that shook the air. Leathery wings cast a shadow over the courtyard as the dragon made its entrance. Deadly rows of teeth gnashed together and its ebony hide looked harder than diamond. Ria swallowed heavily.

This was not good. How had Erimond managed to summon it?

Erimond was climbing up a different set of steps now, up to the battlements. Clarel raced after him, eyes flashing dangerously.

All hell broke loose as suddenly a Pride Demon appeared, flattening the Wardens within a small radius. It laughed cruelly as electric charges spread from person to person. Ria groaned.

The Inquisitor wasted no time, sprinting towards it with his companions behind. Ria followed, dreading the fight. If they weren't careful… she knew where all of this would lead to. With luck, they wouldn't fall into the Fade like the game- then she planned to tell the Inquisitor the truth about his memory. If they did fall into it… then he would eventually find out. Ria hoped it was the former.

Again, they fought the demon. This time they had Wardens to help, and soon the demon was kneeling on the ground. Someone took the opportunity to pierce its spine and it fell dead.

The group then raced up to the top, dodging the dragon's tail as it slammed the walls. Ria had to hide behind the walls when it breathed fire, the flames so intense that she could feel it from a yard away.

When they reached their goal, Clarel was already wounded. The woman was lying on the ground. And the dragon turned its empty eyes in the Inquisitor's direction. Uh-oh.

Ria's impulse was to bolt, but before it could take a step, Clarel cast a spell, striking its underbelly. The dragon roared and crashed to the ground.

It was over, and Clarel was dead.

There was a rumble, a cracking sound and Ria felt sweat break out.

"Run!" she bellowed.

The others followed her as she sprinted as fast as she could. Once she reached safety, Ria looked back, her heart sinking. They weren't going to make it.

 _I can't leave them in the Fade_ , Ria thought before running to dive into the realm of dreams.


	17. Chapter 15: The Maker's Promise

**CHAPTER 15: The Maker's Promise**

"Are you Divine Justinia? I thought you were dead."

Alistair shook his head. "I fear the Divine is indeed, dead. It's likely we face a spirit… or a Demon."

The aged woman smiled sadly. "You think my survival impossible, yet here you stand alive in the Fade yourselves. Proving my existence to you requires time we do not have."

"Can you tell us why we are here?"

"The demon in control of the area you were in has taken your memories. This place of darkness is its lair. It is a nightmare demon, one that I will help protect you from."

Trevelyan frowned. "So that's why I can't remember what happened at the Temple of Sacred Ashes?"

"Yes. You must reclaim them…" Then, the woman turned her warm gaze on Ria. "But I see another one has fallen victim to this enemy."

Ria blinked and glanced about her. _Is she looking at me?_

"Ria Lewis."

The knight was taken aback. "Me?"

Justinia nodded.

"So you mean this demon also took my memories?" _If that's true, no wonder I can't remember..._ "Then I need to retrieve them."

The spirit shook her head. "I'm afraid it is different for you. You cannot reclaim them."

"What do you mean?"

"Your memories will be gone, because they never existed."

Everyone exchanged confused looks.

"Let me explain: the future that you knew before will take turns of its own. It will not be like the game you played in your world. Every decision you make here, in reality, will determine the future."

"You know about my world?"

"Yes. And you must know- there are still memories for you to find. But they will be memories of _this_ world."

"Alright…" said Ria, wondering. She remembered everything that happened since the Hinterlands. So what had the demon taken from her? "Then why can I remember certain parts of the game?"

"I cannot give you the answer, but if I am not mistaken, they seem to be details you need for your quests."

"I don't understand… " said Ria dubiously. "It doesn't make sense."

"I am sorry I cannot explain, but perhaps it will be clear in time. For now, you must hurry and escape from the Fade."

"Hmm," said Hawke, trying to absorb the implications. "She's right. We should get going quickly."

"Yes, go and reclaim your memories," said the spirit of the Divine, and she vanished immediately.

"Well that was… interesting," said Varric as Trevelyan led the way.

"Indeed," said Vivienne thoughtfully. "Then you were right in saying that the future could be different from what you say."

Ria nodded. "I had a feeling… especially since the Winter Palace and that assassin. But we're in the Fade, just like the game. So I think some of the information I have will still be useful."

"I agree," said Cassandra. "With your help, we managed to stop Erimond from escaping."

"Um… that didn't really do anything, to be honest," said Ria. "I hoped it would prevent the dragon from coming but it seems I was wrong."

"Actually," added Solas. "We were able to pull out some interesting information from him."

"You did?"

"Yes, he-" Then he stopped, eyes wary. "Enemies ahead."

"Here we go," said Alistair.

Ghostly humanoid figures approached.

"Wraiths," growled Blackwall.

"Not as bad as a Pride Demon, though," commented Ria.

"Be careful not to jinx us, my dear."

They rushed forward, everyone taking on a wraith. These weren't difficult, but Ria found that she had to aim properly. Once they were clear, the Inquisitor and Ria found the 'memories' in place of the corpses.

Ria took a few seconds to observe her surroundings.

The Fade was definitely eerie in the game, but nothing had prepared her for its abysmal atmosphere, dark and haunting in its coveted mysteries. Stairs and archways were scattered around the realm, but offered little comfort. They simply mimicked man-made structures in the real world. The ruins and the barren land, the cold rocks and fine mist… not to mention the whispers and silent screeches in the air made her skin crawl.

There was no life in this place- it was as if it sucked the soul, feeding on her fears and despair.

"Don't listen too hard, kid," warned Varric. "Trust me when I say the Fade is not for the faint hearted."

"He's right," said Vivienne. "It is the home of all manner of creatures, dark and twisted. They delight in your perusal of it. Give too much of yourself and they will snatch you away without a bye or leave."

Ria nodded but found it hard to stop looking back over her shoulder, as if something might jump out at them any moment.

The group pressed on to the next area, and Ria was extra jumpy when the first demon sprang out. She gave a startled shout and made a hasty swing at it, lopping off its head. But the real scare was the fearlings. The demons were just the usual shades and simple to kill but the fearlings looked like spiders. Ria shuddered after burying her sword in it. Even though she had seen gruesome things in her profession, spiders still creeped her out. Alistair smiled.

"Unpleasant little things, aren't they?" he said.

"That's one way of putting it. I just hate their eyes and hairy legs."

"Let's not describe them in too much detail," said Vivienne, wiping the spider juice on a rock.

"I agree," said the Inquisitor, already moving. "Come on, we don't have much time."

They killed more wraiths to recover the memories, wiped out more demons, and shuddered as they met their hairy friends again.

Along the way, the party stopped when they heard a deep, rumbling voice echoing all around.

" _Ah, we have a visitor,"_ it said, sounding almost amused. _"Some foolish little boy comes to steal the fear I kindly lifted from him."_

Ria exchanged glances with the Herald.

"What was that?"

" _You should have thanked me and left your fear where it lay… forgotten."_

There was no more from the mysterious person after that.

"It must be the demon," said Dorian. "And it's definitely aware of our presence."

"Then we should move quickly- we have to get to the Divine."

They progressed through the Fade, splashing through shallow waters and brushing past brittle leaves that were as lifeless as the air. Here and there, Ria saw ominous pillars that gave her a sense of doom.

Again, just up ahead, they encountered the fearlings and battled it out. But as the knight swung her sword, the voice suddenly spoke up again, raising the hairs on her neck.

" _Did you think you were starting a new life, Ria? That you were leaving your past behind?"_

"It senses your vulnerability," said Dorian, shaking his head.

"Don't listen to it Ria!" said Vivienne, in the middle of burning the spider.

" _Foolish woman… you couldn't even protect your mother. Instead, you left your sick brother and mother to escape your duty."_

The knight felt a cold numbness in her arms, even as she was driving the tip of her blade into the creatures. Pain gripped her then, as those words opened a stitched up wound in her heart.

" _You think you're a hero, but in the end… they will all see the person you really are- a pretender. A murderer…"_

"Of course, a fear demon would know where to hurt you most," said Dorian with distaste. He finished off the last spider and came to Ria, who was staring at the ground, arms limp.

Varric sidled over and patted her arm. "Kid, I don't know what happened in the past but you have to ignore it. We all have buried secrets, not just you. The demon loves making you think that you're the only bad person here."

Cassandra nodded in agreement. "You must close your ears here in the Fade… it is a dangerous place to lose your mind."

"If it makes you feel better," said Blackwall gruffly. "We've all been through this. And every time it sounds more and more like he's squeezing hard for something to blame you for."

At this, Ria had to give a weak laugh. She looked at them all, gazing at her in concern. It was foolish to be weighed down by these things again.

"Alright… thanks guys."

They continued on to fight more spiders and demons, reaching a pulsating green magical barrier at the end.

The Divine opened the barrier for them, which they hurried through.

The path continued up some stairs to the north and, to Ria's dismay, two Pride Demons were waiting for them. Using Ria's previous strategy, the group attacked the posterior knees and spine. Either way, it was much more effective than hacking at the hide. It proved to be a quicker battle, now that everyone knew what to do.

Further along the way, another barrier was lifted and they went through a tunnel that opened up to a small clearing. Just when Ria felt they were near to the end, a fear demon appeared, letting out a high pitched shriek. The multiple arms reminded her of a spider. She unsheathed her sword and rushed at it. Trevelyan and the other warriors charged at it too, only to stumble when it teleported to the far right. Moreover, spiders and wraiths kept coming, preventing them from attacking the demon.

Ria growled in frustration as they came in waves. Individually, they were easy to kill. In numbers like this, it hindered concentration.

Eventually, they managed to focus on the demon again but it was constantly teleporting.

"Critical points, people! Critical points!" Ria yelled.

"Understood!" said Varric.

He shot a bolt at it but was just a second too late. The dwarf cursed as it missed.

Solas took over and froze it, allowing the dwarf to train another bolt at its eye. Right on target.

"And that, my friends, is how you do it," said Varric, satisfied.

But Ria's rest was cut short by a sudden flash in her mind. She briefly saw Trevelyan also blank out before she was sucked into a whirlpool of memories…

 _They were scenes like video clips in her head. It should have been a long time for her to relive them, but somehow time was condensed. She saw herself taking her mother's dagger, her father's wan face brightening on her wedding day. Shianni smiling as her cousin stood next to Nelaros on the platform as the crowd watched._

 _Then it shifted to the girls trapped in the room, shems taking Shianni, defiling her…_

 _And then Duncan, the Warden who took her away as she spat vengeance at her enemies._

 _At Ostagar she saw the leering Darkspawn, flooding in like the bubonic plague. Loghain retreating and Duncan dying._

 _From there to Lothering, from Lothering to Redcliffe and so it went through her journey. Enemies defeated, allies won, a hunt for Andraste's Grace… she saw herself gift it to the girl. By God, she looked so young. A shy smile, a gentle kiss._

 _Leliana, Alistair, Morrigan, Sten, Zevran, Wynn…_

 _She remembered nights by the fire, stories and songs, companionship. Long watches with the bard, trading tales, talking faith. Alistair's looks of jealousy…_

 _Orzammar, Denerim, Marjolaine, Brecilian Forest. Then finally the battle._

 _She saw herself fighting down tears as Leliana wept for her fate._

 _Kallian marched up the cracked stairs, past burning debris and broken bodies. She looked up at the blood red sky, the black smoke rising and the scattered armies below. She saw her fate in the eyes of the Archdemon as it turned its scaly head._

 _And then… the resistance beneath her fingers as the sword pierced the scales._

The revelation was too much. By the time she recovered, Ria was on the ground with tears in her eyes. _I'm… Kallian. Kallian Tabris._

"Ria? Ria, can you hear me?" came Vivienne's voice.

The green light of the Fade filled her vision. She was breathing heavily, as if she'd run a mile. Slowly, shakily, she got up. Ria looked at her friends. They were staring at her.

"Are you… are you alright?" asked Alistair. "You look like you've seen a ghost."

Next to her, the Inquisitor looked similarly dazed, but nowhere near as shocked as Ria was.

"What did you see?" asked Solas.

"Maybe…" she took a deep breath. "Maybe Trevelyan can explain his first."

"He already has," said Cassandra.

 _Great._

"I…" Ria said, licking her dry lips. "I know I've dropped a lot of bombshells on you since I joined but… I'm afraid I have to give you another revelation."

"Whatever it is, you can tell us Surgeon," said Varric kindly.

"I… I'm Kallian Tabris."

There was a shocked silence as they took this in. But no one was more shocked than Alistair. He staggered back, arms limp.

"You… you're Kallian? How can you be her? She _died_! I watched her _die_!" he said, voice thick with emotion.

Ria shook her head. "I don't know what's going on either."

"That is because she _did_ die," said a familiar voice. The Divine had appeared out of nowhere. A sad smile on her face.

"Then are you saying she is a reincarnate of the Grey Warden Tabris?" asked Cassandra.

"That is correct. And through this body, her memories live on. But they were taken from you. Now you have recovered them, to serve the Maker and carry out His will."

"I still feel like Ria Lewis…"

"You _are_ Ria Lewis. But you were also, in the past life, Kallian Tabris. The memories will always be a part of you."

"I don't know what to think. But I feel that it's the truth, it somehow… fits."

"Then I am glad. Your deeds can never be forgotten." Then she turned to the Inquisitor, who looked forlorn. "Inquisitor, I know you must be disappointed."

He stared at her, shaking his head in disbelief. "It was you. They thought it was Andraste sending me from the Fade, but it was the Divine standing behind me."

The Divine regarded him silently.

"And then you… she died. It was all… just pure luck."

The Divine smiled. "Your life was still spared that day and it has played a vital part in this war."

"But there's nothing special about me. I was just in the right place at the right time."

"Whatever happened, the Maker's hand is always present. You may not be the Herald of Andraste, but you represent the hope of all of Thedas. All of you, great or small, strong or weak, are _Heralds_ of Andraste."

Then, the Divine- or her soul- revealed her true form, glowing with the radiance of the sun. Everyone stared at the floating spirit.

"So you're her… spirit?" asked the Herald.

"Yes, an echo of her in the Fade."

"Then I suppose we were right about that," said Hawke.

The Divine seemed to smile. "When you are ready to leave, I will guide you. But remember that time is of the essence."

There was an awkward silence as everyone pondered on this. Maxwell dropped down on a slab of rock, elbows on his knees and gaze on the ground. After a while, Ria joined him, staring at her hands.

"Some day, right?"

He shook his head. "I just feel so useless. That memory was just another reminder that I'm not fit for this. When they handed me the sword and title of Inquisitor, I thought: this can't be right. I'm no hero."

Ria felt sorry for him as he sat there, looking dejected. "Hey… heroes aren't always big men who kill dragons. What matters is that you do the best for this world. You put your heart into it. That's what really commands respect."

"Thanks… but I mean, look at me. Apart from the Anchor on my hand, I've hardly done anything. The others are just as strong, if not more skilled. In Haven, I didn't stand a chance against Corypheus and I was knocked out in Orlais." He turned to her. "You've saved thousands with your skills, you helped us close the Breach, you saved me after Haven, you were the one to kill Florianne and helped us capture Erimond. _You're_ the hero."

Ria stared at him, half laughing. "Believe me, I've done nothing. Like you, it was all chance. If I hadn't played the game before, I wouldn't know how to help."

"Nevertheless, they were your deeds. You deserve the credit," the Inquisitor said seriously. "Not to mention that you were the Hero of Ferelden."

"In my past life… and I'm still trying to stomach this. It's all too much."

He nodded. "It must be strange for you."

"Strange would be an understatement. This is crazy."

A faint smile appeared on his face. "You could say that."

"Which reminds me… something happened again that wasn't supposed to."

The Herald frowned. "Like what?"

"The Divine is still alive. She was supposed to sacrifice herself because of that demon back there."

"Really? Then I wonder what will happen now."

"Yeah… exactly. I didn't have the chance to tell you guys before but there's a giant spider demon waiting for us."

"That's nice…"

"And one of us… has to die."

At this, Trevelyan's eyes widened. "What?!"

"I know… in the game, either Hawke or Alistair offers themselves."

Maxwell shook his head vigorously. "I can't let that happen."

"I don't like it either, but… listen, I think there's a reason the Divine is still living. If she helps us, maybe we can leave without Hawke or Alistair dying."

"… You could be right."

"Don't tell the others yet."

The Herald nodded. "We'll decide what to do when we get there."

They both stood up, and the others gathered around.

"Are you both alright?" asked Cassandra tentatively. "It must not have been an easy moment for you."

Trevelyan shrugged. "We can mull over it back at Skyhold. Right now, we need to get out of this Fade."

The Divine approached them, nodding. "Yes, it is time for you to go. The rift is just up ahead- follow me."

Maxwell and his group ran with the Divine, who was floating ahead. She began to lead them up a rocky hill where the rift pulsed with light. They all hurried up it, eager to leave. Just when Ria reached halfway, there was a disturbing noise behind them. She turned around to gape at a mountainous spider with glassy black eyes, goo dripping from its mandible and hair coating its body. It was her worst nightmare.

"Go, all of you, I will hold it back!" shouted the Divine, already placing herself between them and the demon.

When everyone hesitated, she shook her head. "There is not much time, you must return to your quest! Maker guide you!"

They had no choice. All of them dived into the swirling vortex. Ria was the last to go, glancing back one more time. Peaceful eyes gazed back.

"Tell Leliana… I am sorry I failed you too."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The sun was setting as they rode, its rays burning the golden dunes. Again the gritty particles of the desert swept into their eyes and clothes. It wasn't until dark that the air was cool enough for Ria to stop shielding her eyes and see the rocky arch looming ahead. The Giant's Staircase was a welcome sight considering the hell they'd all been through. After the battle, Ria had been dismayed to find their numbers so diminished. Her own men were down to nineteen, as Keith had died after she left them.

 _From forty to nineteen…_ she thought gloomily. Other knights of the Inquisition hadn't fared so well either, their men dwindling to twenty to thirty, where it was initially sixty.

 _If these battles cut us down like this, how will we fight Corypheus?_ She thought, shaking her head.

The army was still formidable, and with the help of the Wardens and Orlais, they had a chance against the Elder One. But after seeing lives taken so easily, a deep shadow fell on her soul. Victory was just a wishful term, a compensatory label for all the soldiers lost. Men and women with families, children. They would never return to Skyhold.

Perhaps it was on all of their minds, because no one talked on the journey back. A few whispers, a few murmurings. But for most of the ride, it was a path of grim silence. Adamant Fortress had been a taste of the battle to come.

As she was brooding on this, there was a movement to her right. Alistair brought his horse level with hers.

"Lucky, aren't they?" he said, and it took her a moment to realize he was talking about the quillbacks.

The big beasts lumbered about, spikes on their back quivering.

"Lucky not to be a part of all this?"

"Yes…" he glanced at her. "You know, Kallian was able to read my mind like that. One word and she would know what I meant."

"That wasn't that hard to understand…"

The Warden grinned. "I know. But still… I suppose I keep seeing Kallian in you."

At that, Ria turned to look at him. "I guess we did have a history, didn't we?"

"We had good times… and bad ones."

"Like when you decided to cook for us?"

"Hey… that's called real Ferelden food. Not like the fancy vegetable meals you find in Orlais."

"I think I liked Orlesian food better."

Alistair chuckled. "Only because Leliana cooked them."

"Alright, you win. But you have to admit she was good."

"Yes… oh, and remember that time I put my sock in Wynne's bedroll? She thought it was an accident."

Ria snorted. "So that toad in Morrigan's tent wasn't a mistake either?"

"What can I say? I'm a creative person," said Alistair, smiling.

"I'm sure you are," said Ria, smiling back. "It's good to see you again, Alistair."

There was an indecipherable look in his gaze. "Me too. But to be honest, I thought things would change after you told me you were Kallian. I mean… you look like her, but you're not an elf. There are some minor details that make you seem different. Like how your hair is thicker, eyes are darker and voice is nicer." He blushed at the last part.

The surgeon blinked. "You paid a lot of attention to the details."

Her old friend coughed. "Well… it happens when you've been travelling companions for that long."

Ria gave a sad smile. "I'm sorry I hurt you, Alistair. I never realized…"

"Don't. I'm fine," he said, drawing a breath. "It was a long time ago, and… seeing you happy with Leliana made up for it. Until you died, of course."

The smile slipped off her face. "She didn't take it well when I did, did she?"

Alistair sighed. "Yeah…she looked so haunted for months. Hardly came out of her room, hardly ate and just stared off into space."

Ria winced.

"I thought she was going to stay that way forever."

"And…?"

He glanced at her quickly. "I… wonder if I should tell you this. Leliana might decide to kill me if I say it but… she tried to… join you, once."

The euphemism wasn't a good one. Ria's jaw dropped. "What?"

Alistair shook his head. "One day, she started writing a ballad. We all thought that was a good sign, you know? Maybe she was recovering. It turned out to be a really good one, and it became quite popular in Thedas." His eyes turned guilty. "But then we found her missing the following week. And according to a maid, Leliana said the Maker came to her in a vision the night before. He said she would _"see her love again"_."

For some reason, the hair on the back of her neck pricked up. She felt goosebumps all over, and her heart thudding inside. "And then?..." she choked.

"We went searching for her, of course. Your tomb, the Alienage, Orzammar- wherever she was likely to be. She was gone without a trace. But then… we reached the frostback mountains and were about to give up. A man appeared out of nowhere- just an ordinary old man, mind you. He was a merchant, he said. Saw Leliana walking into the palace, probably into the Deep Roads. How he knew that was beyond me- didn't seem like the sort to visit the palace. When I was going to ask him, he vanished. Just like that! And we ran to the Deep Roads and found her, trying to fight the remaining Darkspawn to death."

Ria swallowed, eyes stinging. Her chest felt like something had crushed her rib cage. _Leliana…_

"She loved you, you know," said Alistair seriously. "I don't think I ever cared for you as much as she did. That's why I would never think about stepping in."

The surgeon stared ahead numbly, trying to absorb the news. To think that someone could love her like that was… painful. Maker, she didn't deserve it.

She nodded. "Thanks for telling me, Alistair."

"Just… don't mention that I said it, alright?"

"… she's going to be suspicious. Besides, I'm sure she won't kill you."

"Maybe just torture me."

Ria laughed. "Don't be such a wimp."

Alistair grinned. "Alright, I'm exaggerating. But in all honesty, she was such an ice queen when you were gone. It's good to see she's coming back to her old self."

The surgeon smiled a painful smile. _I did that to her…_

She decided to change the subject. If she thought of the former bard, Ria felt like tearing herself to pieces.

"How's everyone else, by the way?"

"You mean the team? Oh, fine. Sten was welcomed back to the Qunari. Last I heard of him, he was high in their ranks. Zevran went back to the Antivan Crows and I believe he's enjoying life right now. Probably flirting with anyone he meets. Wynne… unfortunately passed away a few months after the Blight. But we knew she had a short time left. She died peacefully."

"I'm sorry to hear about Wynne… she was like a mother to me."

Alistair nodded. "It was sad to see her go. But I guess that's life, isn't it? The living live on."

"They do…"

"Oh, and Morrigan. Well, you met her in Orlais, and she's as bitchy as ever. Excuse my language."

Ria had to laugh at that. "Come on, you don't really hate her."

"I never hated her, but I didn't like her either."

"She's just socially awkward, is all. I think she's mellowed a bit now."

Alistair grinned. "Maybe she's aging."

Ria rolled her eyes.

And the two laughed away and relived memories into the night.

 ** _I have FINALLY revealed this to you all. Phew. I've been dropping a lot of hints about it throughout the story but I don't know if anyone picked it up. Hopefully you all know the ending to DAO where the Warden dies and Leliana goes suicidal. If not, I suggest you read it. Anyway, hope you all liked this chapter. I will try to upload the next one soon after proofreading :)_**


	18. Chapter 16: You Came Back

**CHAPTER 16: You Came Back**

The arched entrance loomed above them as the soldiers rode into Skyhold. Thankfully, the weather was good on their return journey. A Crestwood-like storm would have added to her exhaustion. On the road back, her vision was becoming blurred and she felt like falling asleep in the saddle. Andraste's ass, her body was bruised from head to toe. And her muscles were protesting with each movement.

 _Blast that Rage Demon_ , she thought. The medicine had helped with the pain, but any sudden motion would send the muscle spasming.

Everyone around her looked ready to collapse as well. She sighed as they entered the castle. But now, as they neared the main area, a new energy surged through her. Ria had been waiting so painfully long for this. The Orlesian was on her mind, day and night, haunting her dreams. In them, she kept seeing Leliana disappear into the Deep Roads, fighting to die…

"Didn't sleep well?" asked Varric.

"I…"

"It's alright, kid. We're back in Skyhold now," he said, clapping her on the back.

The dwarf thought she was thinking of the battle. She nodded distractedly.

They trotted in to the sound of cheering as the soldiers held up the Inquisition banner. Victory, they said. But Ria could only remember the faces of the dying. Their screams as the blood gushed.

That was war. That was life.

She looked around as men and women searched desperately for their child or lover's face. They either exclaimed in elation or broke down into tears. Ria looked away, sucking in her breath. She didn't feel proud, she didn't feel like a hero at all. Horses were taken away and soldiers collapsed into the arms of loved ones. There were tears of joy, tears of sorrow. More than once, she heard children ask: "Mother, where's pa?"

Her heart cracked.

And then… she saw her.

Josie was standing on the stairs, her eyes a conflict of sorrow and approval. But Leliana had left the stairs, was pushing past people to find her…

The woman was directly in the line of the sun, running on its path of gold. Her flaming hair was the warm orange of autumn leaves- the leaves of the season she loved. And her eyes... they shone like cut sapphire.

Ria remembered what Alistair told her. She remembered everything… every word, every conversation. All the moments they had together.

And she walked to her lover, grinning like an idiot. Leliana threw her arms around her, sighing deeply. Ria closed her eyes, holding the woman in her arms, breathing in the scent. Their bodies fit each other perfectly. Even through the armour, the soft form gave her comfort like nothing else.

"Tu es revenue," said Leliana. "Tu es revenue, mon amour."

She didn't understand what was being said, and her own French was terrible. So she just laughed, choking on tears. Ria held the woman's head to her shoulder.

"I missed you too," she said.

"Je t'aime," the Orlesian said. "Je t'aime."

Now that, she understood. "I love you," she murmured back.

And the couple stayed like that in the middle of the crowd, deaf and blind to their surroundings. It was like their dance in Orlais, when the song was theirs and there was no one else.

 _I love you. I love you, I love you…_

She had no idea how long they stayed that way. It seemed like a few minutes, but when they drew apart, she noticed that the sun had gone down. Most of the crowd had dispersed, but she knew that the gossip would be endless. Ria smiled crookedly.

"Well… time flies, doesn't it?"

Leliana smiled. She smiled so tenderly that Ria's heart ached. The woman held her head in both hands, leaning forwards for a kiss. It was gentle, but passionate. Once again, Ria felt her knees weaken.

"People were watching," she heard herself say in surprise.

The spymaster shook her head, laughing. "Let them watch."

Then she took Ria's hand and led her up the stairs. In the throne room, she saw everyone feasting and drinking. People were already slurring and staggering. Ria shook her head, smiling.

As Leliana took a seat at one of the tables, Ria leaned down to give her a peck on the cheek.

"I'll just take a bath," she said. The spymaster gave her a very suggestive look. Ria knew she was teasing, but still blushed.

After a hot bath, Ria felt extremely relieved to feel her skin smooth and dirt-free again. She didn't even care that she stung in multiple places. Sighing contentedly, the surgeon walked to the wardrobe. She decided to slip on a dark green tunic with coal black trousers, both imported from Tevinter. Tonight, she wanted to look nice for a special someone.

When she came downstairs to the throne room, all the weariness was gone.

The spymaster was drinking wine from a goblet. She looked so sexy while doing it that Ria had to stop her mind from drifting to inappropriate thoughts. At her approach, Leliana raised both eyebrows, a smile curving her lips.

As she lowered herself down in a chair, the Orlesian hooked an arm around hers.

"You look gorgeous in that. Since when did you start paying attention to clothes?" she teased, but Ria knew she was just enjoying the talk. The content didn't really matter.

The surgeon held the graceful chin with her fingers. "Since I met you."

A broad smile appeared on the woman's face. It wasn't seductive, it wasn't teasing… it was loving.

Then she reached down for the cup, bringing it to Ria's lips. The surgeon didn't refuse- tonight was special. She drank from it, licking her lips briefly. It was a habit her mother always chided her for.

Leliana's eyes burned wickedly. "Are you doing that on purpose?"

Ria laughed softly. "You know me, I'm no seductress."

"I am beginning to doubt that," the woman said, laughing. "That hair, the clothes and those wine coated lips are tempting me."

"Believe me. Your power over me is much greater."

At this, the spymaster lowered her lashes, looking almost shy. Ria wondered at this, but ate and drank with her partner. Varric, Vivienne, Josephine, Dorian and Trevelyan joined them at the table. Together, they laughed, gossiped and bantered. Ria felt as if she had never enjoyed life more than she did now.

She laughed at a joke Varric told and nearly jumped as something was placed in her mouth. Her friends guffawed at her expression. She bit down on the food and tasted cherry. Leliana looked adorably smug. Ria shook her head and smiled. Then, with a wolfish grin, she popped a strawberry in her lover's mouth. Leliana chewed, glossy lips smiling suggestively.

"Oooh," said Josephine delightedly. "Very good choice, Ria."

"Indeed, I'm sure the meaning is not lost on any of us," teased Vivienne.

Trevelyan coughed awkwardly while Varric sniggered. Ria raised an eyebrow.

"Did I miss something?"

Vivienne stared. "Darling, you are _such_ a virgin. Don't you know what strawberries are?"

"She probably doesn't know what the cherry means either," said Varric helpfully.

Dorian cleared his throat. "Now, now. Let's not embarrass the poor surgeon," he said, trying not to smile.

Ria had a _feeling_ about what it meant, but she wasn't entirely sure. Clearly, it had some sexual innuendo. She rolled her eyes but felt her cheeks grow warm. Maker, was it getting hot in the room or what?

"Alright, keep your minds out of the gutter," she said, trying to change the subject. "Now, Trevelyan. Tell us about the poetry you read to Cassandra."

 _Bullseye!_ She thought, as the Inquisitor flushed a brighter shade of red than her.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," he said.

And so the discussion went in the passing hours, ending with Maxwell's face buried in his hands in embarrassment. Ria almost felt sorry for him. Almost.

Vivienne yawned gracefully behind her hand- something only Orlesians could pull off, Ria had noticed. "Now, I think I'm feeling quite tired, wouldn't you agree? After all, we've just had a long journey."

Trevelyan agreed eagerly, and they all said goodnight before retiring to their chambers. The throne room was nearly empty now, as people had long since returned home. Leliana gave her a kiss on the cheek, about to head in the direction of her own room. Before she could, Ria grabbed her hand. The spymaster looked at her in surprise.

Without explaining, Ria led her up to her bedchamber, closing the door behind them. Thank goodness she didn't ask questions, because Ria wouldn't know what to say. She kept pulling Leliana with her until they stood on the balcony. The air was pleasantly cool, infused with the scent of flowers. Music floated up from the minstrels below. Leliana waited for her, a quizzical look on her face.

"Is there something you wanted to tell me?"

"Yes," said Ria, suddenly nervous. She took the woman's hands in her own, biting her lower lip. "Leliana… you look beautiful tonight."

The spymaster's luscious lips curved up. "Flatterer."

"No, really. There's no one," she said, suddenly feeling bold. "There's no one in this world… any world, that is more beautiful than you are. I'm not just talking about outward appearance. I love your soul. I love all of you."

Leliana's lips parted and her eyes softened.

"I…" continued Ria. "I would spend the rest of my life with you." She dropped down to one knee, and the woman's eyes widened. From her pocket, she pulled out the ring she had spent several weeks hiding. The surgeon held it up, a smooth gold band twisting up to a skilfully wrought diamond- crafted into the shape of Andraste's Grace. It had taken her a lot of sovereigns to convince the jeweller to take up this challenge, but the result was worth the cost.

"Leliana. I am yours forever. Will you accept this ring?"

The woman stood there speechless, staring at it. Ria wavered for a moment, suddenly afraid she would say no. But then tears slipped down from the cliffs of her eyes. Leliana put a hand to her mouth, half laughing and half crying.

"Yes! Yes I will. By the Maker, I never expected…"

Ria grinned, heart pounding in elation. _She said yes! She said yes!_ She thought as she stood up and slipped the ring on a slender finger. The surgeon hurried back into the room to get a handkerchief. She handed it to Leliana, who laughed and wiped her eyes. Ria didn't wait- she saw the face in front of her and held it gently with both hands. Then, slowly, she kissed her eyes, nose and lips. The woman's long fingers ran through Ria's hair.

And when they kissed, Ria knew it was fate.

After a while, she drew back. It was time to tell her. Leliana's blue eyes were sparkling now, just like the diamond on her ring.

"Leliana…" she started, smiling at her fondly. "The Maker brought me to you. He has kept his promise to you."

The spymaster blinked. "What do you mean?"

Ria spread out her arms, half laughing. "I'm Kallian. I'm Kallian Tabris."

This final confession nearly brought Leliana to her knees. Ria reached out quickly to stop her falling. The woman could only stare at her, as if trying to decide whether it was a joke.

"You can't be… I watched her die," she whispered disbelievingly, shaking her head.

"Leliana... back at Adamant Fortress we fell into the Fade. I met Divine Justinia… or her spirit."

At this, Leliana choked. "The _Divine?_ "

"Yes. And she helped the Inquisitor find his memory. But she also helped me find mine… I remember everything now. I remember how we fought together, how we quested together. I remember the night you sang to me and told me that death was the beginning of a new journey. You thought I was asleep but... you kissed me and laid the symbol of Andraste by my side."

Hearing the last part, Leliana began sobbing.

"And-"

Ria never got to say the rest because Leliana flung her arms around her, kissing her face, her hair, her lips… the woman was laughing and sobbing again.

"Kallian! Oh Kallian, my love! Thank the Maker!"

The surgeon held the spymaster in her arms, smiling with tears in her own eyes. Then they gazed at each other, smiling and crying. And under the stars they embraced… a love that reached beyond even death and time.


	19. Chapter 17: For A Greater Happiness

**CHAPTER 17: For A Greater Happiness**

For the next few days, Ria slept like a rock. Even Leliana had trouble waking her, because she would just mumble and go straight back to sleep. It was the morning of the fifth day since their return. Weariness finally dissipated, and the warmth of the sun hit her eyelids. The translucent skin flared up red like a pair of dragon wings. She opened them to see the wooden ceiling. Elegant chairs, expensive furniture, the smell of candles… and Leliana. The spymaster was sitting at the round table near the window. Her hood was up and she had such a look of concentration on her face that Ria nearly laughed. Sitting up and resting an arm on a bent knee, the surgeon-knight watched her write. Leliana was so focussed that she didn't notice.

 _My fiancée_ , thought Ria. The fact made her happy. So happy, in fact, that she felt like she could rocket out of the building.

But then she found herself thinking about the life of this woman. A life of betrayal, of trials, of suffering. And Ria had made her wait a decade for this.

Compared to Ria, this woman had been so scarred. So much lost, so little left. Her chest constricted as she watched the light play on her red hair and watched each movement with profound remorse and gratitude.

 _I'm so sorry, Leliana. I'm so sorry._

She would finally give her the best she deserved. She would make her happy. She would never leave this woman again.

The letter was finished. A raven came from nowhere and perched on the window sill. Leliana rolled up the parchment and tied it to its leg. The bird gave a flap and flew off.

Only then did she notice the pair of eyes watching her. A brilliant smile appeared, transforming her features dramatically. The previous gravity vanished as her face became radiant.

After a moment's pause, she slowly made her way to the bed. Ria's eyes followed her movements. Leliana sat down on the edge and Ria pulled her hood down, letting the silken hair brush her fingers. Those blue eyes watched her with an unwavering intensity.

"So serious, Ser Ria," she said with a hint of teasing.

Ria held her right hand in hers, then brought it up to her lips. "You are… precious to me."

Leliana smiled softly. "I would see you smile. I want to see that wolfish grin."

"If I'm satisfied that you get everything you deserve."

The woman touched her cheek. "My love, I have all that I ever wanted. I have you."

"You deserve more. You deserve the world."

Leliana laughed. "You _are_ the world to me." Then she turned serious. She now held Ria's head in her hands. "So come back to me alive. Promise me you won't be a hero and do something risky."

"Um… everything we do is kind of risky."

"Promise me."

"Yes… I promise."

"That's all I want," said Leliana, kissing her lips. Drawing back, she stroked Ria's cheek with cool fingers. "So… when will I hear wedding bells ring?"

Ria couldn't help it. She smiled. "When would you like it to be?"

"Before Corypheus?" said Leliana coyly.

"Are you sure?" asked Ria. "It's going to be a hectic few weeks. Wouldn't you prefer it sometime more peaceful?"

The woman leaned in to her ear. "I must claim you, my knight."

Ria laughed. "You already have."

Leliana shook her head. "Let all of Thedas know it. Let our union be announced regardless of war."

She studied her face. Ria had a feeling she knew what it was. Her blue eyes trembled slightly.

Fear. She was afraid to lose her.

"I will survive, Leliana. I will not die. The Maker is with me."

Leliana gazed at her.

Ria laid a hand on her shoulder. "I will not die," she repeated. "I don't believe he brought me back here to die. He brought me back to you."

Then the spymaster smiled. "You have great faith."

"Not always."

"It is greater than mine."

"I guess it's for you, then," said Ria, smiling.

Then she leaned in to kiss her, closing her eyes. The lovers spent the next hour in each other's embrace, enjoying the peace of the morning. After a particularly heated kiss, Ria held her at arm's length, breathing heavily.

Leliana bit her lower lip, smirking. "Oops."

"Alright… maybe we should get married soon."

"I think that is an _excellent_ idea."

Ria narrowed her eyes suspiciously. "You did that on purpose."

"Maybe?"

The surgeon ran a hand through her hair and stopped as Leliana smirked again.

"Well. I, uh… should get going then. I'll notify Mother Giselle about our wedding and we can sort it out from there. There are a lot of things we need to organize: invitations, the clothes, the venue…" she trailed off when she saw Leliana smiling. "What?"

"You look so adorable."

"Not as much as you when you were writing."

Leliana bit her lip. "I… I've been meaning to talk about it. I have a favour to ask of you."

Ria remembered this part. She nodded. "Is this about Valence?"

The spymaster blinked. "I keep forgetting that you know the future."

"Sorry, I know you like the element of surprise," said Ria, smirking.

"Yes… I am sorely disappointed. But that aside, I'm sure you know that this is important to me."

"Of course. I'll accompany you."

Leliana relaxed. "Thank you. You don't know how glad I am."

"Good," said Ria, studying her. At the thought of the Divine, Ria hesitated. "Would you like to hear about our visit to the Fade?"

The spymaster nodded. "Yes, very much."

And Ria explained in detail their meeting with the spirit, talking about the Inquisitor's revelation and her own memories. She could see a film of tears in Leliana's eyes when she mentioned their adventures together, the big to the little things they shared. She also laughed at the hilarious incidents they had during the quest, like Alistair in a dress and her Mabari ripping up her tent. When she got to the part when the Divine sacrificed herself, the tears flowed freely.

"So she gave herself for others again," the woman said shakily. She pulled herself together. "She was always selfless, living for the greater cause. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised."

Ria nodded. "Leliana… before she did, though, she told me to take a message to you."

Leliana's breath caught. "She did?"

"She said to tell you that she's sorry she failed you too. Does that mean anything to you?"

The spymaster's face grew shadowed. "Yes."

She didn't explain further so Ria left it there. "Well then, that's it. That is how I found my memories."

Leliana's eyes grew distant. "I still cannot believe you are Kallian. I _knew_ there was something about you when we first met. But I never thought, I never _dreamed_ this would be."

"I know… to be honest, I don't really get it myself. But here I am."

"Yes, here you are," said the woman, smiling. Tears were coming down now.

"Don't cry," said Ria, handing her a handkerchief. "I've never seen you cry so much."

The spymaster laughed, wiping her tears. "It's because of you, silly. I had hoped… but I didn't believe the Maker when he said I would see you again."

"You thought he meant your death."

"How did you-?" the woman asked, shocked. "Who told you?"

Ria looked at her gravely. "Does it matter?"

"It _does_ matter. I would never have told you."

"Why did you do it?" asked Ria softly.

Leliana looked away. "… I couldn't live in a world without you."

"I wanted you to live. I wanted you to find someone new."

At this, the spymaster's eyes flashed. "How can you say that? I never took another lover after you were gone."

This was news to her. Ria's eyes widened. " _Never_?"

"Never."

"Maker, that's… a _long_ time," she said, shaking her head in dismay. "Leliana…"

The woman stood up and walked to the window, her back to Ria. Ria stood up as well and joined her. Leliana stared out, hugging herself.

"You don't know how cold those years were. Without you. Without you next to me. Life held little meaning for me."

Ria gazed helplessly at her back. She could almost feel a cold wind on her face at Leliana's words.

"All I could do was pray for a quick death. A fatal illness, a knife to my side… anything. To join you in the Fade. But then… perhaps the Maker knew. Suddenly I was needed again- as Sister Nightingale. My conscience could not refuse. I threw myself into my work, sometimes wishing I would make a mistake and die. But I never did. Maker, for some reason… I never did."

"He protected you."

"I hated him, then," said Leliana, the bitterness in her voice. "I never understood why he let me live those painful years. But now… now I think I do."

A lump stuck in Ria's throat. "I'm so sorry." The agony. Hungry days, hollow years.

She approached and raised her hands to embrace her, hesitating as her hands shook. That back… that lonely back.

 _I left her… I left her because I didn't listen to Morrigan._

At the time, it had felt right. An elder god inside a baby? She couldn't do that. But it had come with a great cost. A terrible cost…

Ria rested her shaking hands on Leliana's shoulders from behind. Then she wrapped her arms around her, placing her head on one shoulder, kissing it.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered.

The Orlesian leaned back against her.

"Don't be," she whispered back. "The Maker has brought you to me."

"Beyond death," said Ria.

"Beyond death," agreed Leliana.

And the two remained this way for a long time, duties forgotten.

Outside, the sky was a depthless blue without a trace of white. Birds sang in the fresh air, as if heralding a new beginning. And the sun blazed in the heavens, as if the Maker himself was smiling down on them.

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Ria tried not to sneeze in the dust filled war room. They really needed to clean it out.

Cullen, on the other hand, seemed unaffected. He glared intently at the map, rubbing his chin. Josie, as usual, was scribbling notes and Morrigan waited patiently. Cassandra was tapping her hyperactive foot on the floor. Trevelyan smirked at her and she stopped.

Leliana, however, wore a mask of indifference, as befitting a spymaster.

"Alright," said the Commander finally. "No wait. Actually, yes. As you know, we have a number of important issues to address. One: we have to get rid of these Venatori. Ever since Haven, they've been snagging the hem of our robes. Two: We need more allies, and three: Corypheus was last seen in the Arbor Wilds. We have sent a couple of our scouts ahead, but they've gone missing. The rest are minor problems that can be resolved. But ones that do require a bit of head scratching."

"You've forgotten one other thing, Commander," said Josie.

"And what would that be?"

"Why, we have a wedding to organize!" said the advisor, winking at Ria.

Everyone stared at Ria and her fiancée. The surgeon felt her face warm up.

"You didn't know?" asked Josie innocently.

Leliana's mask weakened as she hid a small smile. There was a stunned silence before Ria was surrounded by her friends, Iron Bull and Varric clapping her on the back. Dorian, Trevelyan and Vivienne offered their sincere congratulations while Blackwall shook her hand. They moved on to Leliana, conveying their delight.

Even Morrigan approached them. "Well… 'Tis appropriate, I suppose, to congratulate you. After all, you have been through much to come this far."

Ria grinned. "Thanks, Morrigan. We appreciate it."

Then, in a quieter voice, the witch said: "But, of course, you know that if you had taken my offer in the Blight that such pain might have been avoided."

A shadow came over Ria's face, and she was glad Leliana wasn't close enough to hear this.

"It was a cost I regret. But you know it wasn't right. I couldn't."

Morrigan frowned in disapproval. "It might have been distasteful, but one that could have saved your life."

Ria shook her head, sighing. "Okay, this is going nowhere. I won't argue with you. But I know you enough to believe your intentions were good."

The witch fixed that golden gaze on her before inclining her head. "Then I will speak of it no more… Kallian."

"I had no idea you would consider this in such times," said Cullen, after everyone had settled down. He smiled. "It's good to see you make that decision. We would be more than happy to help you."

There was a murmur of agreement.

"I have to say, this is certainly a pleasant surprise," said Dorian cheerfully. "With all that's going on, Maker knows we need a little love in Thedas."

"I agree. It is a wonderful announcement, my dear," said Vivienne, smiling.

"Then what are we waiting for, let's get this started!" Varric said, rubbing his hands together.

"All in good time," said Cullen, fixing him with a look. "We need to discuss the Venatori first. Er, no offence intended, Ria and Leliana."

"None taken," said Leliana. "The war is the more pressing matter."

"Thank you. Now, let's go through this one at a time: we've cleared out the men in the Hinterlands, the Storm Coast and the Exalted Plains. We still need to confront them in the Western Approach and the Hissing Wastes. Not to mention we need to close off some of the rifts."

Josie tapped her notes. "From reports, we have heard the Venatori have been using giants in Coracavus to dig out mysterious artifacts they can use to their advantage. They have since fled because of Darkspawn that are flooding the place."

"And Leliana has also heard from her agents about an Antivan lord involved with the cult," said Cullen, gesturing at the spymaster.

She nodded. "My agents have discovered several pieces of correspondence linking him to the Venatori. He agrees with their… philosophy." Her eyes narrowed. "He has even sent 'volunteers' to red lyrium mines. They have been taken from Rialto's poorer districts, so they have largely gone unnoticed. We planned to confront Enzo with the evidence against him, but he failed to return. The last we heard of him, he hired a ship to Hercinia in the Free Marches."

"I suppose it was too much to expect it to be easy," said Cullen grimly.

"Don't give up yet," said Leliana, crossing her arms. "We have received an offer from the Antivan Crows."

"The Crows?" asked Ria, raising her eyebrows. "The Crows that _Zevran Arainai_ was part of?"

"Yes. That one. With their knowledge, we have tracked down a storehouse outside the city. We may find Enzo there."

"Well that's good news, my dear. But what if he isn't?"

Leliana turned to the mage. "Then we will keep searching. The Crows have valuable information that will help us."

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" said Trevelyan. "We can't go around hunting for this one man while we can kill the ones we _can_ find. It would be a waste of your skills."

The spymaster was firm in her decision. "This _one man_ has been the source of much trouble. I will _not_ let him slip through my fingers."

"Spoken like a true spymaster," said Dorian.

"Yes…" said Cullen, rubbing his chin again. "In any case, I trust Leliana will do what's best. And she's right- we can't let him go loose."

"And while Leliana and all of you take care of the Venatori, I will send word to the rest of the nations to see if they can lend us more soldiers," said Josephine.

"What about the scouts?" asked Blackwall.

Cullen sighed. "The scouts will have to wait. I don't like sending more soldiers to seek them out. But we will have a look in due time."

"Good, then I look forward to crushing some Venatori skulls in the meantime," said Iron Bull, cracking his knuckles.

"Not quite so soon," said Cullen, glancing at the engaged couple. He cleared his throat. "I believe we have some wedding arrangements to discuss."

"Oh, yes!" said Josephine, suddenly becoming animated. "We have so much to do. The venue, the food, the drinks, the invitations, the documents… and the _dress!_ Maker, we need to choose the _dress!_ " She rushed to her friend's side, grasping her hands. "Leliana, dear, we need to get you fitted!"

The spymaster laughed. "One might think _you_ were getting married, Josie."

Cassandra smiled. "Truly? I don't think I've ever seen our spymaster look so lively."

"I have to agree with the Seeker," added Varric, grinning. "Aw…look at her, she's shining."

A rosy tint coloured the spymaster's cheeks. She looked away, smiling.

Ria's own mouth was stretched so wide she thought it might burst.

"Alright, you two lovebirds," laughed Trevelyan. "We'll let you have some time before the mission."

Vivienne nodded. "Absolutely. Now, Leliana and Ria… I mean, Kallian. Shall I notify the tailor about your preferences? I have some connections with the Orlesian tailors, and it won't to be hard to ship the dresses and suits."

Ria rubbed the back of her neck. "Please, just… just call me Ria. And yes, that would be excellent, thank you."

"And have you decided on the location yet?" asked Josephine, already writing down a list in her notes.

"Um, no. But we'll think about it."

"I suggest the garden would be the best place," said Morrigan, surprising everyone.

Ria stared at her. The witch's lips twisted.

"What are you all gaping at?" she demanded.

The surgeon shook her head. "We just… didn't expect you would be the one to suggest it."

Morrigan crossed her arms. "Are you saying I am incapable of talking about the matters of marriage? I do care for my friend, after all."

At this, Ria grinned. "Thanks, Morrigan."

Leliana smirked. "I hope you're not thinking of standing in the far corner during the ceremony."

Ria snorted, thinking of all the times they camped in the past. "I'm sure she won't. We'll drag her to the front."

Morrigan's mouth twitched. "'Tis unavoidable, I suppose."

The three smiled together, and Ria was reminded of old times.

Varric leaned toward Vivienne, whispering: "What are they talking about?"

"An inside joke, I presume," she answered, smiling.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Mother Giselle listened to Ria's story quietly, both hands in her lap. She saw those dark eyes, dark with the memories of her past. And she saw her own self in them.

The surgeon was staring at the ground now, drained by the fresh emotions she had released. Seeing the slumped shoulders and the conflict in the gaze, the Mother was moved with compassion. Despite her deeds in Thedas and her serious demeanour, the woman was very young. Still searching, still fighting to be accepted… to redeem herself.

Over the many months, the spymaster had certainly helped change this knight- to the point where even the Mother had difficulty believing it. There was a brightness in her eyes, a spring in her usually heavy steps, and her skin seemed to glow with health. Talking to her was a joy, and it filled the emptiness she had felt ever since her son passed into the Fade.

The surgeon was like her own daughter, perhaps like a son in many ways. Boyish smile, masculine behaviour, her interests… and the mood swings. The Mother smiled- yes, the vacillating emotions would be enough to concern any mother. But she adored it, loved the spirit in this child and the constant will to better herself.

She laid a hand rough from labour on the woman's hand.

"You have come far and wide with such a burden, my child," she said gently, smiling with compassion.

Ria breathed out a deep breath, sighing. "I thought this would disappear over time. With Leliana, you and my friends… things were improving. But I can't stop thinking about what happened. I keep saying to myself: I could have done differently, I could have done better."

The Mother shook her head. "You cannot change the past, my dear. No more than you can change the sun's movement, or change the moon's pull on the waves. There are many things in life that one cannot understand, and it will be difficult to accept. But that is what makes us human, it is what crafts our life into something beautiful. The chisel in the sculptor's hand will chip away the unnecessary parts of the stone. Do not mourn the loss of these pieces, for it is for the magnificent sculpture that results."

The dark haired woman lifted her head and smiled sheepishly. "Why do you always know the right things to say, Revered Mother?"

The Mother laughed. "I do not know what will help you- I am merely explaining what I have experienced over the years. Remember that I have gone through the same conflicts, the same emotional journey that you have… the Maker's words to me have always been my strength. And so, I pass them onto you."

At this, a strange expression flickered across the young face. "And do you… hear Him?"

"You mean do I hear His voice?"

The woman nodded.

"Perhaps… the Maker does not speak to us in a sound that is audible to the human ear. Rather, He reaches out to the heart, and knows that it is the soul that he must speak to. He speaks through the warmth of the sun, the birth of a new babe, the growth of new love, and the passing of the seasons. These are just a few of His ways. But always, His message is a message of love and kindness." She patted the dextrous hand. "He will not abandon you, my child. Already I can see His mark upon your face and your life."

Ria smiled weakly but returned her gaze to the ground. "He will stay with me… but what worries me is myself. I'm scared that I'll make the same mistakes again, that I'll repeat my past failures."

The Mother paused a moment before speaking. "Guilt and fear are the paths into darkness. Trust in the Maker, for whatever mistake you make, He will not let it destroy you. In fact, many times, the Maker uses our past failures for future success. To present to you a much greater happiness."

Ria didn't reply, but simply nodded.

The Mother wasn't certain her words had reached through the barrier, but she knew it would be enough for the day. With a fond smile, she patted the hand again and stayed with the silent woman for a long time before they finally moved to attend to their duties.


	20. Chapter 18: This Day I'll Cherish

**CHAPTER 18: This Day I'll Cherish**

"It's the Hero of Ferelden," said a boy excitedly as his mother led him away. The woman hushed him quickly.

"It's rude to point, Evan."

"But ma…"

His mother bowed to the surgeon and gave her an apologetic smile. "Please excuse my son, Ser Ria."

Ria nodded as the two walked away.

 _Oh, great…_

Over the last few weeks, word of her past identity had spread like wildfire. People were whispering everywhere that she was the Hero of Ferelden reincarnated. She didn't know who leaked the information, but the Inner Circle hadn't been too concerned. In fact, they were happy about it: this would prove to be a good boost to morale. With _both_ the Herald of Andraste and Hero of Ferelden in the Inquisition, everyone was already considering Corypheus dead.

She guessed it wasn't too bad, but Ria was a private person. She was uncomfortable about all the attention she was getting. Maker, she couldn't even walk the garden without someone bowing to her or hear people gasp and point at her. It was getting ridiculous.

For the millionth time, she dodged the stares and ran up to the throne room. Even there, there were nobles and soldiers all wanting to talk to her. The Orlesians _especially_ were delighted to see her.

"By Andraste," said one lady, approaching. Her Orlesian accent was very pronounced. "We are _so_ glad to see the Hero of Ferelden alive in the Inquisition. Pleased to meet your acquaintance, I am Duchess Trinette."

Ria bowed, wondering how she could make a quick escape. But she was also curious to see a woman of her status so far from Orlais.

"And how is her grace so far from home?"

The woman smiled. "Why, to lend my help to the Inquisition, of course." She snapped open a hand-held fan, covering half her mask with it. Ria could see a pair of green eyes looking up at her. "I am a Duchess, yes. But I am continuing a business of my husband's- the crafting of daggers. Sadly, he passed away a few years ago."

"I'm sorry to hear about your husband…"

Lady Trinette let out a sigh. "Yes, it was unfortunate… but he was always poorly in health. I suppose I knew it was only a matter of time."

Ria nodded in sympathy. "We can only do the best with the time that is left."

The Duchess eyed her for a moment before replying. "Thank you… you are most kind."

Ria inclined her head. "And you took over your husband's business making daggers?"

"Oh, but these are not _simple_ daggers," she said, laughing. "Oh, no. _These_ are expertly made. Designed so that they kill in many different ways, are carried and _thrown_ in different ways. Your soldiers may notice that they can hold so many more, even in the most unlikely places."

The surgeon felt an adrenaline rush as multiple blade tips shot out of the edges of the lady's fan. They glinted right under Ria's face.

"That does sound useful," said Ria, swallowing.

"Exactly," said the woman, pressing an invisible button on the fan. The blades retracted. "Good for assassinations, no?"

"And ranged attacks."

The woman's eyes danced. "I can see you appreciate our work. Feel free to seek my men if you need weapons. Or…" she smiled suggestively. "If you want my company, I would be… pleased to discuss the trade."

Ria stood there dumbly as the Duchess floated away, hips swaying.

 _Did she just…?_

The surgeon shook her head, flushing. After a few more uncomfortable conversations with people, she finally got to the door on the right. Sighing in relief, Ria ran up the stairs to the Atrium Library. There, at least, she knew she would get some peace. It was quiet and smelled of parchment, just as Ria liked it.

During this morning's round, she met a young girl who suffered from unexplained seizures. In addition to that, she had problems with speech, movement and vision. From examining her, the surgeon had her suspicions. But the condition was so rare, and controlling the seizures or a hemispherectomy was a potential cure. But she wasn't a neurosurgeon. Ria walked to the medical section, which was a gratifyingly private area.

She picked out a thick book and stood scanning the pages. Unfortunately, there weren't really any effective medicine in Thedas for seizures. Most of the time, she noticed that they recommended magical interventions. The mage, of course, would have to have a good understanding of the neurological networks involved in the pathology.

Ria sighed, pulling out one book after another.

 _Nope. Nope. Still no. Maybe… no._

She got to the left most end of the shelf and stretched her shoulder muscles, sighing.

Then she felt fingers dancing along her shoulder, slowly travelling down her back. A floral scent surrounded her, making her head dizzy. In the shadow of the bookshelf, she felt lips brush her cheek. A shiver ran down her spine.

Ria turned around to see the spymaster, gazing at her from under long lashes.

"Leliana, when did you-?"

"Since you entered the throne room," said the woman matter-of-factly.

"Why didn't you come to me then?"

The Orlesian examined her perfect fingernails. "I _was_ going to. But someone else was quicker than I."

Ria tried to think of the person she was talking about. There were so many people who approached her she couldn't decide. "Who-?"

Leliana cut her off again. "Someone who looked more interested in seducing you than selling to you."

 _Oh._

"You mean the Duchess?" A thought suddenly occurred to her. Ria felt a sly smile creeping up on her. "Leliana, you aren't… _jealous_ , are you?"

The Orlesian still didn't look at her.

Ria laughed now and Leliana glared at her. "Leliana, _you're_ the one I want. Nothing will change that."

Her lover made a face. "You should have seen the way she looked at you. Like a hawk eying its prey."

The surgeon rolled her eyes. "Well, unless I need daggers, I won't need to see her. You don't need to worry about me falling into a trap."

Leliana shook her head. "That woman is shameless. _Dangerous._ She must have heard the news about our engagement by now."

Ria smiled and drew her into a hug. She didn't care if anyone in the library saw them.

"Maybe she's just a flirter," she murmured into Leliana's hair. "I would never leave you for her."

"You still need to be wary of her," the woman insisted. But she sounded a bit better than before.

"Mmm hmm. On the contrary, I think I need to be more wary of _you_ ," said Ria, chuckling.

" _Me_?" said Leliana, half laughing.

"Creeping up on me like that, looking so gorgeous," said Ria, kissing her hand. "It's _really_ hard for me to wait now."

At that comment, the spymaster seemed to weaken. She smiled, putting her arms around Ria's neck. "Then I believe you. I suppose I'm just worried someone might take you away. Someone younger than me…"

Ria blinked. "What are you talking about? You look like you're in your early twenties."

"Flatterer. But I'm being serious. You don't know how perfect you are… I've seen the way women look at you."

"Er… Leliana, maybe you've been focussing too much on _my_ surroundings. You're…" said Ria, shaking her head. Where to start? "You're everything I ever dreamed about. You're _unbelievably_ beautiful. I mean, listen to what I'm saying here. You've turned me into some cheesy, love struck fool."

Leliana giggled then, and covered her mouth with a hand, looking around in the room. Sure enough, people were staring at them.

Ria stepped back from her, crossing her arms at the onlookers.

"Carry on," she said to them.

They coughed and bowed to the two lovers before picking up their scrolls again.

She turned back to Leliana, whose face was so close to hers Ria could feel her breath.

"I think I've taken enough of your time. I'll see you at the Tailor's."

The woman pressed a light kiss to her lips and slipped away, leaving Ria staring after her.

Then, shaking herself, she studied some more. But it was useless… the sensation of that kiss, the flawless skin and copper hair… she couldn't get them out of her head. In the end, she just decided to visit Vivienne about the patient. That mage was actually pretty good with neurological conditions.

It turned out that she did know about controlling seizures and cast a temporary spell to combat brain swelling and disorganized signalling.

Ria thanked her and checked on the last few patients before heading to the tailor's shop.

The man greeted her respectfully.

"Welcome, Hero of Ferelden."

Ria groaned.

"Just Ria will do."

"As you wish, Ser Ria. Now, we have had some shipments from Orlais. Shall I lay them out for you?"

"Yes, thank you."

There were footsteps as Josie emerged from the dressing room.

"At last, you're here!" she said excitedly. The advisor pulled Ria towards the curtains hurriedly.

"What's the rush?"

"You've been keeping us here for a while now," said Josie exasperatedly. "Where have you been?"

"With my patients. I-"

Whatever she was going to say, she didn't get far.

The curtain was pulled aside to reveal a sight that knocked the wind out from her. Ria couldn't believe it. She was even more stunned than she'd been at the Grand Ball. Standing there, lips parted, Ria beheld the woman who stood in a flowing, elegant dress. The blue was very pale, like the faint tint in ice seen on glaciers. Its material was a fine, embroidered lace around the waist and front. The rest of the dress at the bottom graded out to a deep cerulean, veil-like in texture. And when she spun around, there was an artfully tied blue ribbon holding the folds of the train up.

Ria couldn't speak.

Seeing her face, Leliana smiled in satisfaction. Josephine chuckled from beside her.

"Well then, I take it you like the dress?" said Ria's bride-to-be.

The surgeon's mouth opened, then closed, then opened again. "I-it's… perfect."

"Excellent!" said the tailor, smiling. "You look _beautiful_ in it, Sister Nightingale."

"Then I shall buy it," said Leliana, moving into the dressing room to change. Her smirk never left her face as she saw Ria's dumbstruck expression, the curtain closing.

Josephine smiled, nudging her. "Come on, we need to choose your clothes now."

Ria nodded slowly, feeling like her brain had turned to mush.

She let Josephine pull her along to the jackets. Seeing Leliana in the wedding dress had left her dazed, and she found that the array of colours in front of her made her dizzy.

"Now, does the knight prefer this dark red or the scarlet? Or perhaps this light grey?"

Red, gold, grey, blue… they all looked the same to her. None of them compared to the splendour of the wedding dress. She still couldn't think straight.

Josephine was doing most of the work for her, and even Leliana had finished changing to come and watch. The spymaster was leaning against the wall, back in her armour. Ria's gaze kept drifting to her.

"No, I don't think that will suit her," sighed Josie, pointing at the silver. "Too flashy. We need something that will give her gravity, something that shows her character."

"Then," said the tailor with a flourish. "I know just the one."

He hurried into the storeroom and came back with a coal black jacket. Unlike the other black jackets, the material looked smoother and not too thick. It was also trimmed with a metallic gold at the shoulders, collar and cuffs. Silver blue buttons lined the front and the cuffs were of the same colour.

"Ooh, now _that_ is perfect."

Ria had to agree with her friend. The jacket wasn't overdone and it did match her personality.

She finally found her voice.

"I think I like it."

The tailor's teeth showed. "Would you like to try it on?"

Ria took the jacket and the matching trousers and entered the changing room. She shrugged it on and folded the ends of the pants into her boots. When she stepped out, both of the women stared at her. Leliana's eyes held an unreadable emotion.

"Does it… look alright?" Ria asked uncertainly.

Josie nodded. "Definitely. You look like a noble in the Queen's guard."

"Thanks," said Ria, laughing.

In the end, she decided to buy it.

After that, they each left for their chamber, excited for the wedding day. With Josephine, Cullen and Vivienne's help, they had sent out the invitations. Ria had wanted a more private wedding with close friends but the advisors suggested that inviting the nobles would be good for the Inquisition- that it was chance to display their wealth and influence. She relented, and everywhere, from Nevarra to Antiva and Rivain, notable people came to attend. Ria was surprised at the level of response, and felt sick to the stomach when she thought of all the people watching.

Josephine organized the food and decorations while Vivienne arranged the documents.

Ria lay on the bed that night and thought of Leliana. Their future together. A smile spread as she drifted off into sleep.

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The flurry of activity was astounding as people rushed about, excited for the ceremony. Cooks sweated inside the kitchens and laboured like oxen. Children laughed and ran around, enjoying the celebratory atmosphere. People spent all morning chatting about the couple to wed- guesses about what clothes they would wear, how they would act, who would be coming and so on. The decorations in the garden were amazing, especially since the garden itself was the decoration. Flowers now bloomed everywhere, a myriad of pink, violet, midnight blue, starburst yellow and deep reds. A graceful white archway was erected, intertwined with vines and flowers.

She stood there at the arch, feeling so nervous she could sprint around the castle fifty times. It was even worse than when she had been Kallian, standing on the platform waiting to say her vows. Back then, however, she was engaged to a man she didn't even know. This time she was about to marry the person she would die without- and she was still nervous.

Mother Giselle stood with her, smiling. Ria wondered how she could always remain so calm. She voiced this and the Mother answered: "The presence of the Maker is always the antidote. And on this day, I feel that He is smiling on us."

That made Ria feel slightly better, but she still fidgeted with her cuffs and paced about. As the Lords, Ladies, knights, Templars, soldiers and commonfolk began to flood in, the surgeon felt nauseous.

"Peace," said Mother Giselle, putting a hand on her arm. "They are only spectators. The _real_ purpose of the wedding is to be united with your loved one. The marriage is in the presence of the Maker, and Him alone. Remember that."

Ria nodded, swallowing.

In the crowd, she saw Vivienne, Cassandra and Josephine smiling, Varric, Alistair and Trevelyan waving and Dorian's moustache curling up as he grinned. Ria vaguely noticed he had his staff with him. Iron Bull gave her the thumbs up and Blackwall even winked at her. With a shaky laugh, she saw Morrigan at the front, looking uncomfortable seated between strangers. All were invited… well, as many as could fit in the garden. But even though the garden was full, she could see children and adults watching from the higher levels of the castle.

 _So many people_ , she thought, grimacing.

And then the music started.

It was a different experience for her, not hearing the wedding march. But in her opinion, the slow melody of the string instruments was better than the traditional one.

Ria's heart started drumming like mad. She could feel her pulse through her fingers as she held them behind her back. No one moved, no one made a sound. She could only hear the music.

And then… there was movement on the far side. Ria's breathing stopped when she saw her bride approach. A veil covered her head and face.

But even with the veil, the splendour was to die for. Her dress was lit up by the sun, its hue so deep that it looked alive.

Leliana was led by Cullen, her arm in his. The Commander smiled at Ria when he saw her.

Ria smiled back, but she was so captivated by the woman drawing near that she settled with just staring.

The crowd of guests murmured appreciatively, whistling and encouraging.

Finally, the bride reached the archway, and turned to face her, letting go of Cullen's arm. He sat down at the front row.

As the music faded into the last notes, Mother Giselle prepared herself. There was a hushed silence as the two stood there. The Mother, in her calming voice, began to speak:

"Today, we are gathered together in the presence of the Maker, and in the sight of this company of witnesses to join together these souls in marriage."

She turned to Ria.

"Ser Ria Lewis, Hero of Ferelden. Do you swear unto the Maker and the Holy Andraste to love this woman the rest of your days?"

Seeing the veiled woman in front of her made her heart tremble. Ria knew this was going to be the surest decision she had ever made.

"I swear unto the Maker and the Holy Andraste to love this woman the rest of my days. To love her, comfort her, honour and keep her in sickness and in health."

Mother Giselle nodded in approval before turning to Leliana.

"And do you Leliana, daughter of Oisine, Spymaster of the Inquisition, swear the same?"

"I swear, until the end of my days."

"Then let this marriage be sealed, before the Maker and the witnesses gathered here."

Ria raised both hands, everything else fading away. She lifted the veil, revealing the face of her lover. Leliana smiled at her, eyes sparkling in the sunlight. The way she looked at Ria… she felt like she had everything she ever needed.

Ria leaned in to kiss her, closing her eyes. And those cherry lips had never tasted so divine. It was better than their first kiss. There was more depth, more meaning to it. It contained all their memories, all the torment that time had wrought. Now the past met future, and future met past.

There was a great sigh as people relaxed, and a deafening applause sounded. Music began again, and Ria had to force herself to stop the kiss. When they drew back, the two gazed at each other, smiling like crazy. Then there were Oh!'s and delighted gasps as something fluttered down to their noses. It was raining rose petals and diamonds. They both looked up to see the sky blocked out by thousands of them. Of course, the petals were real but the dusts of diamonds vanished when they hit the ground. Back in the crowd, Dorian winked at her. Leliana looked so happy that Ria felt tears start to form in her eyes. She offered her an arm, and her wife took it. Together, they walked through the crowd.

As they passed, she glimpsed Josephine dabbing at their eyes, Varric punching the air and the others just smiling at her.

Ria was so happy, it was like a dream. Something light and expansile swelled in her chest, just about to explode. She was so happy that nothing could really describe it.

They reached the throne room, and Ria had to gape as she stepped in. The tables were laden with food fit for the Maker. At the far end, where the throne had been, there was a long table set out with two big chairs that were clearly for them. They seated themselves as the rest of the guests flooded in. Everyone gasped in surprise at the display while the Inner Circle joined them at the main table. When people settled down, Cullen stood up.

"Now, before you tuck in to this feast, I raise this cup to Ser Ria and Lady Leliana. To love and long life!"

"To love and long life!" echoed the guests, raising their own goblets.

Everyone drained the wine and the music started again. Drinks flowed, food was plenty and laughter never ceased. Ria ate well, but as she looked at her wife, she found that she wasn't really hungry.

 _My wife. This feels so weird… but so right._

Leliana lifted her eyes to her, wine on her lips. She smiled and laid a hand on Ria's hand under the table. They just gazed at each other for a long time, oblivious to what was going on around them. It was only when a loud _crack_ sounded in the background that they looked.

Even the spymaster laughed when they saw a number of people flailing about with foam and cake on their faces. Sera ran away cackling hysterically. Ria smiled and shook her head. The nobles swore in either Orlesian or Ferelden, chasing after her. Then she felt something cold on her face and the smile slipped off. Leliana laughed, eyes daring her to retaliate.

The surgeon wiped the cream off, staring at it. A wicked gleam came into her eyes as she dipped her hand into the dessert. Leliana's eyes narrowed, but amusement danced in them. Ria coated her wife's cheeks with it. The spymaster laughed again and pushed her away, wiping at it. Some of the cream was on her lips. Ria leaned it to kiss it, tasting chocolate. The Orlesian didn't resist, pulling Ria's head closer.

They only drew apart when Josephine called them, smiling. "Alright, there's plenty of time for that tonight," said Josephine. "Why don't you join us in some gossip?"

The surgeon felt like she was back at the palace as they exchanged secrets that burned the tips of her ears. After that, Ria greeted each of the nobles and ambassadors in turn, thanking them all for coming. They replied what a wonderful wedding it was, that they were impressed with the display of wealth. Some of them even commented on the flower petals and diamonds at the end. It was all politeness and small talk, exhausting Ria to death. The most awkward conversation, though, was meeting Duchess Trinette. For Leliana, as much as herself, Ria tried not to talk too long. The woman gave a theatrical sigh.

"It is such a sad thing to watch you wed, Hero of Ferelden." Then she smiled. "But of course, that is not the end of everything. I have enjoyed this ceremony of yours, surgeon."

"Thank you, your grace."

She snapped her fan open. "And if you should grow… tired of life, I am always open to light dalliances."

"Thank you again, but… I'm quite sure that will never happen," said Ria firmly.

"Regardless, the offer is there."

Ria left as quickly as possible.

When she finally got back to her seat, drained, Leliana gave her a sidelong glance. Then she smiled and placed her hand on Ria's thigh.

The knight gave her an apologetic look. "Sorry I had to talk to-"

She put a finger on Ria's lips, shaking her head. "I trust you."

A lump appeared in her throat. Ria swallowed. "Thank you," she said.

Leliana gave her a fond look before a seductive smile curved her lips. She glanced at her sideways, as coy as only a bard could be.

"If you truly _are_ thankful, then you can repay me tonight."

Ria's heart suddenly beat faster. The former bard's hand slid up her thigh…

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From outside, the moonlight flooded in like a mysterious spell. Everything in the bedchamber took on a fey glow. It was a more lavish room, spacious and richly furnished. The newly wed couple lay on the huge bed positioned against the wall.

 _Holy Andraste..._ thought Ria as she looked up at the ceiling, resting a hand on her forehead.

Leliana kissed her temple and lay next to her on the left.

"My God…" Ria whispered, breathless. "So that's what it is."

Leliana laughed. "That's what you missed out on," she said.

"I can't say it wasn't tempting, though. By the Maker…"

The woman shifted closer. "And now you know," she breathed against Ria's shoulder.

Turning her head, Ria met the light in her eyes then, and she knew…

 _You're the one_ , she thought, laughing to herself.

The old Ria Lewis would never act like this, the old Ria would never say these things. Who was this woman? She had changed this heart forever.

Ria captured her lips in a deep kiss. She couldn't get enough of this woman. Couldn't find the words to adequately describe what she was feeling.

Priceless. She was priceless.


	21. Chapter 19: Honeymoon in Orlais

**CHAPTER 18: Honeymoon in Orlais**

Ria woke up to see her wife looking at her, blue eyes watching softly.

The surgeon rubbed her own eyes and blinked.

"Good morning," she said, smiling.

"Good morning," said Leliana, her eyes still like the surface of undisturbed waters.

Ria touched her cheek, stroking it with a thumb.

"What are you thinking?"

The spymaster smiled, holding Ria's hand and leaning into the touch.

"That you are here… with me. That you came back to me."

No matter how many times they talked about this or how many times she was reminded of it... Ria felt like ripping herself apart. Images of the day she broke the news to Leliana were still fresh in her mind. She could never forget it.

"I did," said Ria. "And I'll never leave you."

 _I promise you._

Leliana kissed her on the lips and drew back, smoothing out Ria's hair.

"I know you won't."

Ria closed her eyes, relaxing at the sensation. They were here... they were really here. It had taken her two lives to experience to reach this point, but she was finally here. Both times, it had required something stronger than reason to breach the cold barriers in her. But with one _touch_ , Leliana made her feel at home. Made everything feel like it was right.

The stiffness around Ria's mouth, the furrow between her eyebrows, the hostility in her eyes… they were gone. They were long gone.

She finally opened her eyes lazily, smiling at her wife. "I could do this all day."

Humour danced in Leliana's eyes. "Perhaps I am spoiling you."

Ria chuckled. "I could hire you… you'd be well paid."

At this, the woman slapped her arm.

Ria laughed now, pressing her lips to her wife's. "Are you happy?"

"More than you will ever know."

"Good, I'm satisfied."

Leliana reached out and twisted one strand of black hair around her finger. She batted her eyelashes and smiled suggestively. "You were irresistible."

At that, Ria's face warmed up. She cleared her throat, feeling slightly self-conscious. "Really? Wasn't I a bit… awkward?"

Leliana leaned in close. "You were a natural. I don't think I've ever had such a _delicious_ night."

A grin spread across Ria's face. "Well. That's good."

"More than good…" sighed Leliana in a sultry voice. "I'm hungry for more."

The surgeon smiled, pulling the woman closer to her chest. "We have time. Plenty of time."

"That's a promise."

Ria chuckled. "Alright. I promise… my wife," she said, tasting the words. She loved it.

Leliana nuzzled her neck. "Mm… that sounds heavenly." She wrapped her arms around Ria's waist.

They lay in the bed this way for a long time, hours passing like sand through fingers. The first birds chirped outside and they listened quietly, bodies pressed together. Ria marvelled at how it felt. The comfort, the reassurance. This was worth living for.

"I know I'll keep saying this but, I can't believe all this happened."

Leliana smiled. "It seems too good to be true, no? We have been given another chance."

"Yes… And I'll never let it go to waste."

The former bard touched Ria's neck. "Nor I."

Ria smiled, nodding. She allowed the embrace to continue for a good while before rolling out of bed. A firm hand grasped her shoulder.

"Going so soon?"

"I know… I don't want to either, but I have to check on my patients."

Leliana's hand drifted down her back enticingly. Ria tried to quell the burning in her belly.

"I've taken care of that," said the spymaster with a satisfied smirk.

Ria turned to face her. "You have?"

The woman covered herself modestly with the blanket. "I asked the healers to monitor them, and the mages are taking your place. Mother Giselle is also going to be supervising."

"Oh… thanks. That was good thinking."

" _Yes_ ," said Leliana, beckoning her wife to the bed. "So no more escaping. Come to me."

When she saw that Ria was moving too slowly, the spymaster reached out with a long arm and flung her down on her back. Soft lips crashed down on hers and they were at it again.

They made love in bed until the sun was high in the sky. Outside, they could already hear the clang of metal and the thud of arrows hitting targets.

Leliana caught a glimpse of her reflection in the mirror on the end table and tutted. She sat up and began redoing her braid.

The woman laughed as her wife grabbed her from behind. Ria grinned as she pulled Leliana down.

She kissed her. "You look perfect already."

The spymaster wrapped her arms around Ria's neck. "My love, an Orlesian never gets out of bed without perfecting their hair."

"You can do that later," murmured the surgeon, kissing the smooth neck. "Damn… you make me feel crazy. I can barely contain myself."

Leliana smiled with her eyes, stroking her cheek. "Then I am satisfied that..."

"That I won't what?"

"That you won't succumb to that _whore_."

" _Oh_ , her," said Ria, laughing. "She's got nothing on you, don't you worry your pretty head."

A brilliant smile lit up her wife's face. "Good, because I only want you for myself."

The surgeon kissed her again on the lips. "How can I leave this goddess for that woman?"

"Such _flattery_ ," tutted Leliana. But she was smiling as she said that.

"I know…" said Ria, grinning. "But I can't stop myself. The words just keep coming out."

"It is love's power," said the spymaster, gazing at her tenderly.

"Well, then. I must never have loved anyone else."

Leliana kissed her on the lips for that comment. But the moment was ruined when a deep rumble came from Ria's stomach. They both drew back and paused. Then Leliana burst out laughing. Ria chuckled, embarrassed.

"I guess it's lunch time, then," she said, grinning.

"I suppose it is," said Leliana, still giggling. "Come on, let's get dressed."

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The summer breeze came in from across the north east, the salty smell of the sea pervading the air. It was pleasant, and gently stirred the thin shirt she was wearing. Ria wished she was wearing sandals instead of boots, but Leliana had seduced her into them.

"That just wasn't fair," she grumbled to herself.

As they walked on the white stones of Val Royeaux, she felt the sun's heat bearing down on the black boots. And they just had to be _black,_ of all colours.

Apparently, Orlesians were fashionable even on the streets. _Particularly_ on the streets.

 _At least she didn't make me wear a mask. I wouldn't be able to breathe in that._

She wiped the sweat off her forehead as Leliana pulled her through the crowd.

Though they had visited Orlais for her wife's personal mission, it was Ria who suggested the place for their honeymoon. On arrival, the first stop was Belle Marché.

The marketplace was bustling, full of so many colours that it was dizzying. Women were wearing stylish dresses that looked too hot for the weather and the men were wearing _tights_. Just the sight of them made Ria sweat. But she had to admit, the food was amazing.

Ria let her wife lead her to a stand, where a portly man was selling an array of mouth-watering pastries. She'd been curious about Orlesian food and if it was similar to what the French sold back in her world. It turned out to be very similar.

After those, they also tried hot crepes drizzled with honey, chocolate coated berries, candied chestnuts and apple tarts. Leliana _loved_ the apple tarts. Ria laughed and fed her one more. Leliana closed her eyes, smiling at the taste. She even licked the crumbs off Ria's fingers.

Her wife looked so cute that Ria kissed her on the mouth, not caring if anyone watched. Leliana giggled and put her arms around her neck. People passed by, whispering at the bold display of affection. It was a good thing no one recognized her.

When they pulled apart, the spymaster kissed her on the nose and Ria grinned, putting an arm around her shoulder. They walked to the next stand. The woman there was selling masks.

She welcomed them in Orlesian, which Ria didn't understand, so she let Leliana talk. Apparently she was happy to give them a discount since they were such a charming couple.

Leliana talked some more before turning to her delightedly. "I mentioned your name, and she says she will give them free of charge."

At this, Ria raised her eyebrows. "Well…I'm glad I killed Florianne, then."

Her wife nodded. "News of your deed has spread everywhere. You have gained favour with many in Orlais," she said.

Ria grinned. "Well, I _was_ pretty impressive, wasn't I?"

Leliana laughed and pushed her. "Don't get a big head about it."

"Maybe I should get this one," said Ria, picking up a lion mask. She put it on, crossing her arms and puffing her chest. "Since I'm the hero of Orlais."

Leliana shook her head, smiling. She picked up another and held it over the lion mask, cocking her head. "Hmm… how about this one? I think it suits you better."

Ria looked at her suspiciously. She pulled off the lion mask and examined the one her wife suggested. The surgeon nearly choked when she saw the duck head staring back. Leliana burst out laughing when she saw her face. Ria's gaze fell on one particular mask and grinned wickedly.

"Wait, I think I have the _perfect_ one for you," she said, holding it to Leliana's face.

Ria doubled over laughing. The woman snatched it out of her hand and stared at it.

"Oh ha, ha. Very funny."

The surgeon couldn't stop the hysterical laughter bubbling up.

"You… like… nugs so much, so…" she said in between breaths, wiping away tears. When she recovered, Leliana wasn't looking pleased.

"Are you done?"

"Sorry… but you look so cute in it."

The spymaster rolled her eyes but a smile tugged at her mouth. "Alright, what are you _really_ going to get?"

Ria picked up a very elegant, ivory mask decorated with lace and gold. "How about this… for the princess?" she said, handing it to her wife with a flourish.

Leliana glared at her sideways but took it with a small smile. "Not bad. I'll take it." She seemed pleased at being addressed as 'princess'.

Ria scanned the rest of the masks, and her gaze fell on one. The smile slipped off. It looked… very much like a Siberian husky. Leliana noticed the change in her expression and drew closer.

"Ria? Is something wrong?"

The surgeon shook her head. "Nothing wrong. Just… it looks like my dog."

Leliana patted her arm sympathetically. Ria shrugged and settled for another mask in the end.

They explored the marketplace some more, watching some artists paint and browsing clothes. By the end of it, the surgeon's legs were about to fall off. But her wife still seemed full of energy.

She pulled Ria to another shop. Leliana looked so excited that Ria couldn't refuse. Smiling, she let herself be led in. When they stepped in, Ria blinked at the rows and rows of shoes that surrounded her. She laughed. Trust the woman to choose _this_ shop.

Leaning on the wall, Ria watched her wife as she tried on different pairs. White, scarlet, silver, indigo… the pile just grew bigger and bigger. The shopkeeper, after finding out who they were, started chatting animatedly with Leliana. He was eager to show the spymaster the best of his wares, pulling out exclusive styles and helping her decide.

As they did, one pair caught Ria's attention. The lines of its design was stylish- almost like the shoes back in her world- the material satin and a blue that reminded her of the Aegean sea. She pushed off the wall and approached Leliana. Kneeling down, she took hold of her wife's ankle and slipped the slender foot into the shoe.

Leliana looked down, a soft expression in her eyes.

Ria fit the other shoe on and smiled up at her. Something unspoken passed between them.

"You know…" said Ria softly. "They say good shoes take you to high places."

The other woman smiled, eyes shining. "Someone once said to me that good shoes were practical ones."

Ria grinned back.

The shopkeeper was beaming when Ria handed him the seven pairs of shoes they chose, including the blue ones. He gave them a good discount, and commented on how they suited Leliana.

"Beautiful shoes for a beautiful lady!"

"She is beautiful, isn't she?" agreed Ria, beaming.

A small smile appeared on her wife's lips. "You are both too kind."

Ria rolled her eyes at the modesty. The man behind the counter chuckled. "Well then, I hope you enjoy walking in your new shoes. They are of the _finest_ make! And if you ever visit Orlais again, find old Julian and he will give you _special_ deals."

They thanked him and left the shop. Leliana hooked an arm around Ria's, smiling at her.

"Thank you, my love. I have not had the chance to enjoy shoe shopping in a while."

"No problem. I like spoiling you."

Leliana kissed her cheek.

Together, they walked the impeccably clean streets of Belle Marché, enjoying each other's company. The grandeur of the city, with its gorgeous decorations, superb architecture and artistic pursuits appealed to Ria. Plus, it made it more meaningful to know she was sharing in her wife's culture, a glimpse into her background.

"… but also the capital of the Chantry," Leliana was saying. "The Divine used to be seated at the Grand Cathedral. There, the Chantry members sing the entire Chant of Light, which takes up to a fortnight to complete. I used to listen and sing along... it would make me feel better about everything. Better about…" her voice trailed off.

"About what?"

"… about the fact that you were gone," finished the spymaster, face suddenly shadowed. But then she shook herself and smiled. "But I suppose it paid off to endure those times. Otherwise I wouldn't have been a part of all this and met you."

Ria nodded. "I'm glad you pushed on. I'm sor-"

A finger was placed on her lips. The Orlesian shook her head.

"No more apologies. You are here, and I am happy. So happy I could die today."

Ria looked at her in alarm. "That's… not exactly what I'd like to hear."

"It's an expression, silly. I'm not going to do what I tried years ago. Don't worry about that."

"Well, alright. Then we'd better prolong that happiness. What do you want to do next?"

Leliana pondered for a moment. "The Grande Royeaux theatre. You _must_ visit that if nothing else."

"Then what are we waiting for?" said Ria. "Let's go."

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The play actually turned out to be really good. Actors were very talented, and projected their emotions without overdoing it. Because it was all in Orlesian, Ria had to read the translations on a piece of paper handed out to foreigners. The story of the play was based on empress Celene and what happened at the Winter Palace. Leliana had been excited about this, saying she couldn't wait to see who played Ria.

Ria herself wasn't that pleased about who the actress was, but _was_ interested to know that Celene actually had a secret relationship with Briala. After the fight with Florianne, the elf had been following the empress around a lot, but this fact hadn't clicked until today.

"Did you know about this?" she asked Leliana, who smiled.

"Well, I had my suspicions. But it is one rumour that the empress failed to suppress. Another reason for Gaspard to try and take the throne."

"Right… so it's forbidden love."

Leliana crossed her arms, looking down at the 'Inquisition', skulking about in the shadows- which wasn't what they actually did.

"Yes," the woman said, sadness in her gaze. "It is a shame for the royalty. She must produce an heir, something she cannot do with a woman. There is great pressure for her to choose a husband, and fulfil her duty as empress."

Ria nodded, as it was something she'd been thinking about as well. "Speaking of that…" she said, fidgeting with the piece of paper. "Are you… alright with us not being able to…?"

The spymaster laid a hand on hers. Ria looked up to see a soft expression in the woman's eyes. Again, she was struck by the brilliance of the blue- no trace of the bitter frost that used to coat it.

"My love, this is _more_ than I could ask for. I thank the Maker everyday for you. I dream peacefully now, and no longer relive the terror of those days."

Ria felt her throat constrict as she heard those words. "Why did I leave you?" she whispered. "If I'd known you would be in such pain, I would _never_ have left."

Leliana smiled. "Whatever happened, I know you were doing what you thought was right. It seems that part of you hasn't changed either…."

Ria held the white hand tightly and then kissed the hand, just as she did on that night at the palace. And a familiar music floated up, just as it did on that night. She and Leliana brought their attention back to the stage, where they saw themselves dancing on the floor. Memories returned fresh… the music, the feeling of holding hands, the intimacy of the moves …

The actors did a good job of replaying that scene, and the couple clapped along with the audience when it ended.

"Bravo," said Leliana, smiling. "The quality of these plays has not diminished, I see."

"That's a relief, because imagine if they ruined that scene."

"I would be utterly dismayed. It was the most perfect dance."

"And I would have stormed their office."

The spymaster gave her a teasing look. "Peace, Ria. You need to control that temper of yours."

"You sound like my mother."

An expression of uncertainty passed over her wife. "Speaking of your mother… I saw earlier how you looked at that mask. You miss home, no?"

Ria smiled, ready for this. "Only sometimes. We've… gone our separate ways. Since dad died, I guess I was either too busy or too messed up to see my family."

"It's a shame our worlds are so far apart."

"I know… I would have wanted to introduce you, though. They would have liked you."

The spymaster smiled, cocking her head. "Truly?"

"For one, you're absolutely beautiful," Ria said, kissing her hand again. "And… you're polite, friendly, graceful and fashionable. Oh, and you're Orlesian. That's one major point there- back in my world, there's another country called France that's uncannily similar to Orlais. My mother liked all things French."

At that, Leliana's eyes widened in pleasant surprise. "She did?"

"She would have loved Orlais. And you two would have gotten along."

The smile on her wife's face widened. "Well, that is a relief. The way you talk about your mother … it sounded like she is strict about who you choose."

"Not really… it's more about my career choices. She didn't want me to be an artist."

Now, at that, Leliana's eyes widened more. "You wanted to be an artist? You never told me that!"

"Why is that such a surprise?" asked Ria, laughing.

"But… you're a surgeon. It's so different…"

"Like being a bard and cloistered sister?"

Leliana glared at her. "No, silly. That's different. I _left_ that life to join the chantry."

"Well, alright. I guess I still use art in medicine..."

"Hm… I'm still not pleased you kept this from me."

Ria took her hand again, grinning. Even when she was pissed off, Leliana looked cute.

"I'm sorry, I didn't really have the chance to tell you. In case you haven't noticed, we're in the middle of a war."

"What about those _private_ times we had?"

"I'm not someone who brags about my skills. There wasn't a need to talk about it."

Leliana kept fixing her eyes on the stage. It was now near the part where everyone collapsed.

Ria sighed, but smiled. "Come on, why are you so upset about this anyway?"

"I'm not _upset_. It irritates me that you know all about me, yet I know very little of your life in that world."

At this, Ria laughed. Leliana glared.

"Sorry… you just look so adorable when you say that. Alright, don't kill me yet. Those eyes can do some real damage. I'll tell you all you want to know during our time here. Deal?"

Her wife finally smiled, albeit reluctantly. "Deal."

Still chuckling, Ria looked back at the play. Everyone was on the floor now, drugged by the wine. Her doppelganger came running in, looking this way and that. She bumped into Briala, and they immediately sprinted for the ballroom. Empress Celene was on the floor, with Florianne gloating over her.

"Cousin Celene, you have been a thorn in my side for long enough. I will enjoy killing you tonight."

 _Okay… that wasn't exactly what she said. Maybe it makes it more dramatic._

Gaspard laughed evilly beside her. "Let us finish this, my sister."

"Yes, very soon, my brother. _After_ I relish my moment of victory."

The actress who played Briala hid in a corner before bolting out with Ria close behind. Together, they fought the knights and the siblings. The surgeon laughed as the scene played out. Without the elf's smoke bomb and electric traps, they wouldn't have succeeded. The play made it look like the two of them thrashed the knights _and_ Florianne. Briala knocked Gaspard out with her sword (which she did not have), and plunged it into his heart.

Florianne cried out and attacked the two of them with renewed vigor. She slipped through her defence and stabbed Ria in the abdomen. Both Leliana and Ria shuddered at that. The memory of the knife twisting in wasn't something she wanted to remember.

Briala put up a good fight, but Ria crawled on the ground to stab Florianne's ankle. At least that was accurate. With a scream, the enemy fell to the ground as poison spread via her bloodstream. 'Ria' lay on the ground, red dye pooling under her. Everyone in the ballroom woke up screaming and shouting. The curtains closed and opened again later to reveal Ria awake and well. And she was dancing with Leliana on the balcony.

"Alright… who spied on us that night?" said Ria.

Her wife laughed and put her arm around the surgeon's. "There are eyes everywhere, my love. It is hard to keep secrets in the palace."

There was a resounding applause that echoed in the theatre when the curtains finally closed. An appreciative murmur rippled through the crowd as they began to move out. Ria and her wife also followed the others, arms entwined. They both put their masks on. People were chatting and laughing around them as they walked through. They reached the exit when someone let out an excited gasp.

"Ser Ria! Sister Nightingale!"

People's heads turned, craning their necks to see the couple. Quickly, the two pushed through the crowd to escape the attention, their masks hiding their faces. Also, Leliana wasn't a spymaster for nothing- they slipped out without trouble.

After running for some time, they reached the fancy building they were staying at. Ria doubled over, panting.

"My, _that_ was fun," laughed Leliana.

Ria grinned at her, coming to wrap her arms around her waist. "No kidding…" then she gazed at the woman. "Damn, why are you so gorgeous?"

"Should I not be?" asked the spymaster archly, putting a hand on the back of Ria's neck.

The surgeon smiled widely. "No. Keep being gorgeous."

"Then you can demonstrate your appreciation up in our suite…" her wife said suggestively.

Ria coughed. "In a bit. I… need to buy some equipment."

Leliana narrowed her eyes in suspicion. "What equipment?"

"I need a new cleaning kit for my armour,"said Ria, counting things off her mental list. "I need a new whetstone, a dagger- which I didn't get back in Skyhold because of the Duchess by the way, a better belt, _and_ I need to get Varric a present."

The spymaster sighed. "Alright, then. But don't make me wait too long."

"I won't. I'll be back soon."

Ria didn't wait for a reply before running off in the direction of the marketplace again. She bit her lip, trying to stop a silly smile from stretching.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The sun was touching the ground when Ria came back. Puffing, she stopped and looked down at the wrapped gift she was holding. She smiled to herself, but was also nervous about doing this. In the past, she had never liked someone enough to plan these sorts of things. Hopefully the night would end well. Ria walked up the stairs to their room. A big red door there was the entry, but the noise was sure to alert her wife.

 _What to do…_

The open window caught her attention. She grimaced as she thought about squeezing in through there. Ria peered in and saw Leliana enter their bedchamber. She closed the door behind her.

 _Perfect._

The surgeon climbed in and tried not to wince as she twisted her arm. She tiptoed to the bathroom and closed the door behind her, sighing in relief. For the next few minutes, she lit the candles, tipped the box of petals onto the water and hid the gifts in a corner. She stood and examined her handiwork. It really helped that the bathroom was high quality. In the light, the water was like gold and the candles were reflected on its surface. Satisfied, Ria tiptoed to the lounge and entered the bedchamber. Leliana looked up from reading a book.

"Oh, you're back," she said, giving her a pointed look. "Do you know what time it is?"

Ria tried not to smile. "Sorry, I'll make it up to you. I promise."

"You better," said the spymaster, already moving to capture Ria in a kiss. "Now come with me."

The knight couldn't help it. She smiled. "Later. Come with _me_."

Leliana's arms dropped and she let out a noise of frustration. "What now?"

Ria took her hand and led her to the bathing room.

"Ria, what are you-?"

The door closed and Leliana stood staring, blinking.

"By the Maker, was _this_ what you were planning on all along?" she asked, laughing.

Ria nodded, and gestured at the large spa-like tub. "Care to join me?" she asked, already pouring them glasses of wine.

"I would," said Leliana, smiling widely.

"But first," said the surgeon, holding up a hand. "I have gifts to give the lovely lady."

She walked to the corner, picked up the long gift and the rolled up piece of paper. Red ribbons were tied to them both. Leliana accepted them with a smile and opened up the big one first. She gave a gasp of delight, running her hands over the polished wood.

"A lute! I haven't played one of these since…"

Ria nodded sadly. "And now you can."

Leliana smiled at her, eyes brimming with emotion. "Thank you."

"I want to hear you sing again, Leliana. Make music, enjoy the finer things in life."

"Thank you… thank you so much for this," her wife said again. "But what's this?" she asked, looking at the rolled up paper.

"Open it."

She did, and when those blue eyes took it in, her lips parted. Leliana stood speechless, but then smiled. "When did you-?"

"Do you like it?" Ria asked shyly.

" _Like_ it? I love it! But when did you have the time to paint this?"

Ria joined her to have another look at her work. The copper hair, the pale blue eyes, the red lips, the intelligence and grace… yes, she was satisfied.

The surgeon rubbed the back of her neck, looking up at the ceiling. "Just before I left to close the Breach. I finished it off back in Skyhold."

"Really?" her wife asked slyly. "Well, you certainly took your time to confess your feelings to me."

Ria laughed. "Yeah… I just, wasn't sure if you felt the same way…"

Leliana slid her arms around her wife's neck. "Thank you," she murmured. "It's wonderful."

Ria smiled, but then blinked as she felt moisture on her shirt. "Leliana, are you… are you crying?"

Her wife pulled away, smiling and dabbing at her eyes. "Just a little. It's… this is all so kind of you." Then she gave her a sideways glance. "But so romantic. I never dreamed you had this side of you- not when I first met the dark, brooding surgeon at Haven."

Ria laughed. "I didn't know I had it in me either… but I've changed. For the better. Now, if you're done admiring the gifts, shall we…?" she said, pointing to the bath.

"Oh, yes," said Leliana.

Together, they entered the tub and took long sips of the wine. Setting it aside, Ria put her arm around her wife and sighed contentedly.

"This is the life," she said, grinning.

Leliana smiled and laid her head on her shoulder. "Yes, it is." She sighed. "I wish this night never ended."

Ria laughed. "Same here. But we still have a few more days before Valence."

Leliana lifted her head to kiss her cheek. "They won't be as special as today was."

"Everyday with you is special to me."

Her wife smiled and leaned closer, kissing her slowly on the lips. Ria responded to it, running her hands through the silky hair. The spymaster deepened the kiss, and the two closed their eyes to enjoy the bliss of the moment. And in the dim light of the room, the comfort of the hot water, the couple forgot the worries of the war and the shadows on their future together.


	22. Chapter 20: Actions, Not Words

**CHAPTER 20: Actions, Not words**

The towel landed on Ria's head as she stood up. Then a shirt, and then a pair of breeches. She caught the book before it hit the floor.

"Hey! I like that book."

Her wife turned to face her, hands on her hips. She glared, tapping her foot impatiently.

"How many times must I clean up your mess after you?"

"I said I would-"

"That's what you said yesterday. And the day before that."

Ria sighed. "It's not really a _mess_ , you know. I've arranged it so it's convenient for me to find things."

Leliana held up a jacket. "Ria, you put this on a coat hanger. _Not_ on the chair." She shook her head. "For someone who cares about cleanliness, you do a terrible job at home."

"Look, when you spend all day at the hospital and come back, cleaning up is far from your mind." Ria crossed her arms defiantly. "Besides, should I talk about how you don't leave any room for my things? For example, you put your entire make up on the desk. There's barely enough space to put my paperwork there."

"You can store that in your bag."

"I've already organized the piles. Moreover, I've noticed some have gone missing… which I suspect you threw away."

"Then check the bins."

Ria rubbed her temples, sighing. "Okay, I've had enough of this," she growled, and picked up the spare keys.

"Fine, go and vent your anger elsewhere," said Leliana, throwing up her hands exasperatedly.

" _Fine_ , I will."

Ria marched to the door, flung it open and slammed it closed, rattling the windows violently. She walked down the stairs and mumbled a stiff hello to the man coming up. Her neighbour gave her a sympathetic smile.

"A lover's quarrel already?" Gustave asked in a thick accent.

The surgeon's lips twisted. "She keeps _nagging_. And we're both getting on each other's nerves."

Her neighbour laughed. "Well, that is only natural. If you did not, I would doubt whether you had feelings for each other."

"Really?" Ria asked dubiously.

He nodded. "Oh, yes. My wife and I quarrel often, sometimes for weeks if it's bad," he said, beckoning her to come closer. "And do you know what the solution is?"

"What?"

"A hot, steamy night," he whispered, chuckling at Ria's expression.

She rolled her eyes. _Men._

"No, truly," he said, still chortling behind his mask. "Actions can do what words cannot."

"Well… maybe later. I'm not in the right mood."

The man patted her on the shoulder. "Give it some time. Cool off that anger and come back in a while."

Ria nodded and thanked Gustave before continuing to the streets. It was a very fine day, cloudless and quiet, with everyone sleeping in.

 _Too bad I can't enjoy it._

Only a few days ago, they'd been having the time of their lives. But with each passing day, the Orlesian was on her tail for every blasted thing. Ria still loved her, but it was getting damn frustrating.

Glaring at the ground, she walked past the fancy shops, the marketplace and then the gates to arrive at the barracks. Killing Florianne had opened a lot of doors- permission to use the training grounds was one of them. Ria strode into the area, turning the heads of soldiers. With a violent move, she wrenched the sword free from its sheath. Taking her usual stance, she attacked the dummy. Ria channelled all of her emotions into each slash, every shattering blow. She wanted to pulverize it.

Everything else was a blur, an insignificance. There was only the one victim, the one sacrifice. She hacked, she broke wood, she jarred her arms but didn't care.

It was only till she realized the dummy had diminished to a headless and armless figure that Ria stopped, breathing like a rhino. The surgeon dropped her sword, _Leliana's_ sword, on the gravel. She stood there, hands swollen and bleeding. She recognized this in herself… this destructive behaviour. Ever since her father died, it was like there was another person living in her.

And this wasn't just about Leliana… the stress of everything that happened had finally snapped the strings. Everything from work, to her father, to all the filth in her life. And then being constantly on the move in this dangerous world.

 _I haven't changed, have I?_ she thought gloomily.

Ria sighed and picked up the sword again, looking at it listlessly. She had wanted to give the world to Leliana. She promised she would treat her with all the love she deserved.

A failure, that's what she was, a disappointment…

Her memories took her back to the look of dismissal in her boss' eyes, the firm line of his mouth…

" _You know my answer to that, Lewis."_

 _The consultant put the phone down with a decisive click. He laced his fingers together and looked at her with deceptively neutral eyes._

 _Ria let out a frustrated sigh. "If you would just let me-"_

" _No," said Howe flatly. "You've lost your chance… and my respect." He shook his head. "I know what happened to your father was a great loss…"_

 _Ria sucked in her breath._

 _The boss continued. "… but it doesn't give you the reason to do whatever you like here," he said, his voice turning whip-like._

" _What are you talking about?"_

 _Howe slammed his hand on the desk and Ria flinched._

"Don't _play the fool with me! I've heard the reports, I know what you've been doing. Skipping rounds and operations, bullying the House Officers, ignoring calls, lying about patient details- you crossed the line of professionalism long ago. My patience has grown thin- it's time for you to grow up!"_

 _Ria opened her mouth to explain but the man held up a hand._

" _But what really makes me furious beyond measure is your involvement with my daughter!"_

 _At this last comment, Ria felt her face flame up and her jaw dropped. She spent a few seconds trying to get the words out of her mouth. "I don't know what you've been hearing, but it's not like that at all."_

" _Don't even think about lying to me," hissed the consultant. "She comes back late every night!_ Every _night! And I've seen the texts she's been getting!"_

 _Ria let out a harsh, disbelieving laugh. "And just what kind of texts are these?"_

" _Do I have to get into the details? I don't want to hear anymore- I don't want you anywhere near her."_

 _The junior surgeon ran a hand down her face. "Fuck, I can't believe you think… alright, fine!" she said, throwing up her hands. "If it makes you feel better, I'll get as far away from her as possible."_

" _Not only that," said the consultant, who was trying to calm himself. Howe closed his eyes and let out quick successive breaths. He opened his eyes again, fixing her with a steely gaze. "I want you to pick yourself up, sort out whatever issues you're having and come back to work with a better attitude. Or I have no choice but to report you to the council."_

 _Ria glared back at him, the electricity between them almost audible in the silence of the office._

 _After a few minutes, the consultant shook his head and turned the back of the chair to her. "Bear in mind that the only reason I am protecting you is because I remember who you were before this. Do not fail me again."_

 _Hearing the dismissal only served to fan the fire in her. Without a word, she marched out of the room. On the way to the lifts, she nearly walked into Craig Reilly._

 _She raised her head but didn't apologize- she just brushed past him._

" _So what did he say?"_

 _Ria stopped, working her jaw. "None of your business."_

 _She could almost see his smirk. "Oh, I think it is my business. After all… we don't want word to get out about you and Jess."_

 _As soon as the words were out, Ria whirled around and punched his face. The registrar howled and doubled over, clutching his mouth. Drops of blood hit the floor. The cleaners would have to redo the area._

 _Ria eyed him in disgust. "Bastard," she said and turned to go again._

" _Fuck you bitch!" Craig said through his fingers. "Howe will hear about this!"_

" _To hell with Howe," muttered Ria, leaving Reilly groaning in pain…_

There wasn't anything she did that was right. But Howe's accusation stung like nothing else. To hear this from a man she respected … it had cut her down to the core. The emotions from this encounter still burned in her vessels like a tiger that wouldn't be tamed. Ria tried to calm herself, taking deep breaths in and out. But it never worked.

She could feel the rhythmic beating of her heart against every layer of skin. Even behind the retina of her eyes, and she saw the blind spot pulsing…

 _Oh, shit_ , she thought.

A skull splitting headache erupted, as if Florianne's dagger was twisting into her cranium…

From a young age, Ria had suffered from debilitating migraines. She had to spend days- sometimes a week- in bed, in a dark room with the curtains drawn. Over time it had improved, but sometimes… if she pushed herself hard enough, it came back. Like now.

Ria doubled over, clutching her head. Her vision blurred and suddenly half the world vanished. The clanging of swords was amplified several fold, the light of the sun like blinding headlights. She could hear muffled voices around her.

With a growl she kneeled on the ground, eyes shut. Everything was pain, everything was unrelenting agony. Her fingernails scraped her scalp, as if digging would find the source of the headache. She had no idea how long she stayed there for, and was vaguely aware of hands on her arms that she pushed away. Movement hurt, and thinking was like hammering a nail into her skull.

But there was one thought that penetrated the haze…

 _Leliana._

Her smile. Her voice…

Again and again she imagined her wife beside her in the darkness of her mind. The pain was explosive, throbbing... dominating. But then, she could hardly believe it when it began to abate. Slowly, but surely, the drilling faded away until light and sound no longer bothered her.

By the time she recovered, Ria was lying in foetal position, drenched in sweat and tears in her eyes. The earth was vertical. She blinked, pulse and breathing slowing.

"Ser Ria… Ser Ria, are you alright?"

The surgeon lay there for a few heartbeats before taking her hands away from her temples. This proved to be a challenge because her arms were as rigid as wood. She got up shakily, mouth dry and eyes stinging. A soldier stood over her, extending a hand. She recognized his mask- he was one of the men from the Winter Palace.

"I'm… fine," she said, and took the offered hand. Ria took a deep breath and wiped the sweat from her forehead. All the soldiers in the area were staring at her. She cleared her throat, slightly embarrassed. "Thank you," she said to the man, but didn't explain further. There wasn't any need.

"Are you certain?" asked the soldier. "Should we bring a healer or-?"

"No," she said quickly. "Just… carry on." Ria returned a challenging glare to the men who stared at her. They coughed and carried on with their own practice.

Without another word, she dragged her shaking legs to the office. There, she apologized for the dummy and handed the chief officer the coins. He looked at her strangely but she ignored it. Ria left the training grounds to collapse into a chair near the Thoroughfare. A fresh, salty breeze stirred her hair and dried the sweat on her face. She let out a shuddering breath.

These migraines… they hadn't happened for a while. But the good thing was that it had stopped so quickly. Usually it went on for days…

She buried her face in her hands, trying to wait away the tremor in her body. It was a while before she recovered enough to stand again. But she remained there, staring across the ocean and at the islands that jutted above the waves.

By the time she started heading back, the sun was nearly down. Before she returned, she decided to visit the marketplace. Only the florists and artists were out and about.

She walked to the florist in the corner.

"Can I help you, mademoiselle?"

"Actually… I'm married."

"Oh," said the woman. "My apologies, you looked so young… I presume the gift is for your loved one?"

"It is."

"And what are you looking for? A romantic, single rose? Or perhaps a bright bouquet like this?"

"Um… sort of both. It's to say sorry."

The florist laughed behind her mask. "Ah, I _see_. A lover's quarrel, then? Or… a light dalliance?"

Ria shook her head at the last part. "Just a quarrel."

"Then you must be a good wife indeed. Forgive me, I have seen so many scandalous relationships in the past. It is the norm here in Orlais."

"So I've heard," said Ria, half laughing.

"Well then, your partner must be very lucky to have you. What does she like?"

"Well, my wife…I don't know. I've never bought flowers to apologize before. I was hoping you would have a suggestion."

The florist laughed. "I think I have just the one for you."

She lifted a bouquet and handed it to her. It was a mixture of classic red, soft pink and white roses. Simple, but just right- it looked as if the flowers were meant to say sorry.

Ria smiled and bought the bouquet.

"Hope it goes well with you both," said the florist.

 _So do I._

"Thank you."

When she got to the stairs to their suite, Ria hesitated. Was the gift too much, or too little? Would her wife laugh at her effort or…?

 _Never mind. Too late now._

She deliberately knocked on the door so her wife would come to it. There was a few minutes' pause before it opened. Ria rolled her eyes.

 _Trying to gain the upper hand,_ she thought with a weak smirk. She was still a little shaky from the episode today.

But she wasn't prepared for the stunning woman in a nightdress, leaning against the doorframe. Leliana had her arms crossed, an eyebrow raised.

"Back so soon?" she asked indifferently, but there was the hint of a smile.

Ria didn't reply. She just stared.

"Is that for me?" said the Orlesian, smirking.

The surgeon laughed, shaking her head. "Maybe it isn't," she answered, smiling crookedly.

"Then don't come back until you've sorted out your other lovers," said the Orlesian, pretending to close the door.

Ria stopped her, holding the slender wrist. She grinned and held it out to her. Leliana drew closer to take it, a playful glint in her eyes. She smelled them and her lips curved up.

"I just wanted to say sorry… I'll do better from now on."

"Anything… else?"

"And…" Ria kissed those luscious lips. "I love you."

Leliana smiled into the kiss. She put her arms around Ria's neck, pulling her closer.

"Mm. That's all I wanted," she said, tapping Ria on the nose. "The roses are lovely… thank you."

"You're welcome," said Ria, grinning. She made a move to step in, but her wife grabbed her wrist and held it up to the light. Leliana gave her an accusing look.

"What have you been doing out there?"

Ria fixed her eyes on the wall, trying to twist her hand out of her wife's grip. "Nothing. I just had a bit of practice."

"Well, I wouldn't be surprised if your target was completely destroyed. Come, let's get you cleaned up."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The hot water was starting to make her drowsy, and the steam in the room wasn't helping either. Ria shook her head as Leliana walked in with the topical cream and bandages. She watched her wife as she laid the equipment out.

"Leliana, I can do that myself."

The Orlesian didn't reply, but sat beside the tub. She grabbed Ria's hand, turning the palm upward. Slowly, she applied the cream on the torn flesh. The cold substance relieved the angry burning and stinging. Ria felt her eyes close from the soothing sensation. Sleep was starting to creep up on her. She was almost nodding off when Leliana finished bandaging her hands.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

The question snapped her out of her stupor. "What?"

The other woman's blue eyes were looking at her, soft and gentle. Ria shook herself alert and dangled her bandaged arms over the edge.

"It's alright… I've thought things through."

"You must have been very upset to do this to yourself."

"It wasn't you… don't worry. It's just… the stress has been building up."

Leliana laid a hand on her arm. "If that's the case, maybe you should take a break from your medical duties. Let the healers work with the mages."

"I _am_ taking a break."

"No, I mean after we return to Ferelden."

Ria sighed. "I could… but I'm worried about how they'll do."

"I'm sure they will be fine. You need a rest, my love."

The remainder of the conversation was irrelevant to her. In her sleepy state, Ria took in the nightdress, the way it hugged the gentle curves.

 _Damn, she looks sexy as hell_.

With one hand, she drew her wife's chin toward her and kissed those red lips. Leliana pulled back, tutting.

"Oh, alright. But dry yourself first- I don't want those bandages to get wet."

Ria nodded eagerly and practically jumped out of the tub. Leliana smiled seductively and opened the door.

"I'll be in the bedchamber."

The surgeon hastily dried herself and caught her wife's waist, turning her around to kiss her neck. Leliana laughed as Ria swept her into her arms.

"Careful with your bandages," the Orlesian said, smiling.

"It'll be fine," said Ria, rolling her eyes. "Right now… you look too sexy in that nightdress to be left alone…"

Leliana's fingers traced the line of Ria's neck. "Well then… I suppose it served its purpose."

The surgeon grinned. "Always the seductress, eh?"

Her wife made a face. "Which reminds me- why am I always the one to act first? Even when you were Kallian, you waited until I said all those things!"

Ria laughed as she carried her to the bedchamber. "Sorry about that… I guess it's just more fun to see you make the first move," she teased.

Leliana slapped her shoulder. Hard.

Ria chuckled and laid her down on the bed. She pressed her lips against Leliana's, moving on to kiss along the jaw. The woman tilted her head in pleasure, burying her hands in Ria's hair.

"Mmm. You smell nice," murmured Ria.

Leliana chuckled, but then sighed contentedly as her wife ran a hand down a leg.

"Maker," said the surgeon, pausing. "You're skin and bones. Have you been eating enough?"

The Orlesian let out a noise of exasperation. "I have. Now enough talking," she said, kissing Ria on the lips. With a smile, Ria let herself be silenced by her embrace. She couldn't help thinking that maybe Gustave was right... actions could do what words could not.

And that was the end of all conversation that night.


	23. Chapter 21: Burden of the Left Hand

**CHAPTER 21: Burden of The Left Hand**

The chantry was quiet. Eerily quiet.

Brazen torches were flaming along the stone walls, and massive statues towered over them. A long red carpet stretched toward the sculpture of Andraste, her arms crossed in holy display. Candles circled the base of the platform and flanked the leather book open below her feet. Ria's footsteps were muffled on the fine carpet, and she took the opportunity to look around for any suspicious movement. She couldn't remember what happened here, but she had a strong feeling they would find danger.

Leliana stopped a few meters away to kneel, dipping her head before the statue.

"It's just as I remember it," she said, voice rich with nostalgia.

"Is it really the same?" asked Ria in surprise. "That should have been years ago."

The spymaster turned around. "No, I meant after the Blight. I came here to see Justinia… after you left. To pray for you."

Ria felt the familiar sharp pang in her chest. "Well, thank the Maker you don't have to do that anymore."

"Yes… but the Divine was very supportive of me during those times. She kept me occupied, reminded me of what I had left. Justinia was just Dorothea then, a revered Mother."

The surgeon came to hold her hand. "I'm glad she was there to help you."

Leliana gave her a quick smile. "As am I."

"It's quite peaceful here... it must have been good for you."

"Yes, it was a place of comfort. It is good to see it still untouched by Corypheus," said Leliana, gazing at Andraste.

Ria gently squeezed the delicate hand, still uneasy about the silence.

"Leliana?" a voice echoed.

A chantry sister walked in, her eyes widening in surprise. "Is that you?" she asked, the expression quickly slipping into a smile.

Something about this woman rang alarm bells, and Ria felt herself tense.

Leliana, however, seemed unaffected. She smiled cordially.

"Sister Natalie! What are you doing here? I thought you were in Val Royeaux."

"No," said the Sister, approaching to embrace her. "I've been here since Justinia died."

 _Hmm…_

As they hugged, Ria was relieved to see her thoughts mirrored in Leliana's eyes. The spymaster was shaking her head at her, eyes narrowed.

"This place makes me feel like…" Natalie was saying. "Like she's _still_ with us."

Ria frowned. That last part sounded hastily made up.

Leliana decided to play along. "Ria, this is Natalie- a trusted friend. Natalie, this is Ser Ria, my-"

" _Wait._ Ser Ria? You brought the Hero of Ferelden here?"

To the surgeon's surprise, the Sister kneeled before her. "My Lady, forgive me for not recognizing you earlier."

"Er… I'd rather not be recognized."

Leliana was impatient not to waste more time. "Natalie, listen. There is something hidden here- something Justinia left for me."

The Sister's eyes looked a little shifty for Ria's liking.

"Oh? Really? What is it?"

"I don't know. But we'll find it. I'm curious to see what brought us all here." Leliana turned to Ria. "Justinia's letter left instructions for me. They were a little cryptic, however."

"Can I see the letter?"

The spymaster nodded and showed it to her, reading it out: "Always remember that faith sprung from a barren branch. That light has no fear of darkness. And above all, that strength lives in an open heart."

Rubbing her chin, the surgeon frowned. The Orlesian caught the motion and smirked. "Is that Cullen's habit I see?"

Ria dropped her hand. "Hey, mine is different. He does it like a bearded old man."

"If you say so." Her wife tapped a finger on the letter. "Now help me figure this out. Is there anything you remember?"

At this, the Sister looked curiously at the surgeon.

Ria frowned again, trying to sift through the memories. "The riddles were linked to artwork hanging around this place, I think."

"That's a start. I'll have a look over there."

The spymaster moved to the left wall while Ria scanned the right for any paintings. There was one to the corner, and she walked over to it. It was a picture of a white rose rising up between two pillars of an arch wrapped in vines.

 _Always remember that faith sprung from a barren branch… this must be it._

Ria looked around the painting and noticed a small notch in the stone under it. She pressed on it, and there was a mechanical click as it unlocked something deep in the building.

"You found it," said Leliana, coming to see. "Well, that matches the description perfectly."

"The other ones are probably quite literal as well," guessed Ria. " _Light has no fear of darkness_. Maybe something to do with the candles or the fire?"

The spymaster nodded, agreeing.

They walked over to Andraste, where the candles were plentiful. As they did, Leliana started chatting with Natalie.

"Do they still sing verses from the benedictions every Friday?"

"Er, yes… of course," said the Sister.

The rest of the conversation faded into the background as Ria looked on the ground and also the base of the statue.

"Look for a notch, something that you can press," she said to the other two. They nodded and, after a while, Leliana made a noise of triumph. There was another mechanical click. "And now for the last one…"

The final riddle was easiest to solve. She and Leliana stood staring at the painting.

 _And above all, that strength lives in an open heart._

"I have to say, she was very literal with this one," said the spymaster.

Ria snorted. "You can't get any more literal than that." She pressed the last button, and there was a very audible rumble from the right. The three turned to the artwork of Andraste as it swung open. Ria hung back to let Leliana go in first.

There, under the banner of the sun, a small golden box sat on a two layered table. As soon as she saw it, the woman whirled around to press the blade of a dagger to the Sister's throat. Ria held out a hand.

"Wait! Leliana, what are you doing?"

The Sister _was_ a suspicious character, but there was no need to threaten… or even _kill_ her.

"I'm protecting us," said the spymaster in a low voice. "They never sing the benedictions here on Fridays, Natalie. Something so _simple_ , and you got it so wrong. I wanted to believe, but you were lying from the start," she hissed.

Natalie's shocked expression was replaced by a firmly zipped mouth.

"Keep that mouth shut if you must, dear. You've already told me everything I need to know. Grand Cleric Victoire sent you, didn't she? Victoire was _always_ an opportunist."

Ria didn't really know the details of what was happening, but perhaps they could turn this to their advantage.

"You don't have to do this, Natalie. Join us, join the Inquisition."

The Sister smiled nastily. "I was called to serve the Grand Cleric. I will not betray her. Kill me then. I am not afraid to die for my beliefs. At least _I_ still know what I believe."

The last remark must have opened an old wound, because Leliana pressed the blade deeper into the flesh, drawing blood. Ria stepped in, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"Leliana... Let her go, she's not a threat."

The spymaster's face half turned to her, and Ria felt a stone drop in her gut at the expression. Icy blue eyes glared back, a new storm in those orbs. It was like seeing the hardened Leliana back in Haven again.

"She serves the Grand Cleric- this is not a game to be played lightly," she said coldly.

Ria shook her head. "She's just one woman. We're the Inquisition." Then she lowered her voice. "Don't give in. Remember the sword you gave me. Remember what you once said to me in Lothering."

Leliana's hood obscured her face so she couldn't see the expression. But after a moment's pause, she sheathed her dagger.

"The Hero of Ferelden has spoken," she said acidly to Natalie. "Run, tell your mistress that she has a choice. The Inquisition is coming."

Sister Natalie nodded once, then hurried off out of the chantry.

Leliana turned around, looking past Ria to the box on the table. The surgeon followed, heaviness in her heart. Her wife stopped and opened the lid.

"No!" she exclaimed in dismay. "This can't be it! There's _nothing_ here!"

Ria frowned and drew closer. "Take another look, there might be something you missed."

The spymaster examined the four sides of the box and finally the lid. "There's a message here, carved on the lid."

"What does it say?"

"The Left Hand should lay down her burden," said Leliana, lifting her head. She still had her back to Ria. "She's… she's releasing me. The Divine has a long reach, but it is always her Left Hand that stretches out. A thousand lies, a thousand deaths. Her commands, but my conscience that bore the consequences."

Ria finally reached out and turned her wife to face her. Leliana looked about as emotional as a stone statue.

"Then you have to let it go now. Let _her_ go. You don't owe her anything anymore."

A change swept over the spymaster's face. Ria tensed uncertainly. Leliana looked up, eyes sad and weary. "Ria… if it were not for you, I would have killed Natalie and called it a good thing."

The knight breathed a sigh of relief.

 _Maker's breath, that scared me_ , she thought.

She shook her head, placing a hand on her wife's shoulder. "We all have our moments. And the years have been hard on you. Think of the job you had- the very nature of it demanded that you kill."

"Still, that is no reason for me to act this way," said Leliana, sighing. Then she paused, a weak smile forming. "Thank you for showing me what was right when I couldn't see it for myself."

"You know I'm always here for you."

The last chips of ice fell away from her eyes. Leliana hugged her, and Ria felt the warmth that seeped into her limbs. It wasn't just the physical contact- she could feel warmth in her spirit.

"Thank you," murmured the woman, leaning her head on Ria's shoulder. "There have been many lies, many betrayals. But I know you will always be with me."

Ria laughed softly. "Not just me. You also have Josie, Vivienne and the others of the Inquisition."

"True. I suppose I do have loyal friends," Leliana said, straightening. "But that last betrayal nearly made me lose myself..." She pressed a hand to her temple, sighing.

The knight kissed her. "Then I'll be here to make sure that doesn't happen."

Her wife smiled then, and it lit up her face. Ria felt like she was seeing the Leliana she met during the Blight. She drew her into a gentle embrace, breathing in her scent. The two remained like this for a while before they left the chantry, smiling and chatting again- just as they had in old times.

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"How was your trip? Come, give me all the details," said Josie, for once abandoning her notes to look at her expectantly.

Leliana crossed her legs in the chair. "Oh, it was good," she said casually.

"Now, that is not nearly enough information, my dear," said Vivienne, coming in to seat herself. "Considering the fact that we've been covering you during your… what did Ria call it again?"

"Honeymoon."

"Ah, yes. That. Anyway, we want a full report of what happened."

" _Definitely_ ," said Josie. "Begin with the first day."

The spymaster rolled her eyes, but smiled. "Well, let's see. We walked around the marketplace, trying out different food, wearing masks and doing silly things. Then we visited the shops and…" she bent down to show them the box. "Ria bought me these."

Josie gave a gasp of surprise when she opened it, clasping her hands in delight. "My goodness, these are _beautiful_!"

"Indeed," said the mage, nodding appreciatively. "How very thoughtful of her. I always knew she had some fashion sense hidden under the armour somewhere."

Leliana laughed at that. "She's not too bad. I think she's learning quite quickly."

"But oh, I'm so jealous!" said Josie. "It's difficult to find good shoes these days. _Especially_ here in Ferelden. I miss shopping in Orlais."

"She bought me seven pairs in total, but I think that was the best." Leliana tried not to sound like she was bragging too much.

" _Seven_ pairs? My, you have been spoiled, my dear."

"Right, so now that you've made us terribly envious, continue the story."

"Don't be envious just yet, we brought back presents for you all."

Leliana reached into her bag to hand Josephine and Vivienne their gifts. Her Antivan friend gasped in delight when she unwrapped it.

"Oh my goodness! These are the shoes I've been hearing about.. And oh! This is the tea set I've been dying to buy! Thank you, my dear!"

Leliana laughed. "You can thank Ria for them. She dragged me around everywhere trying to find these for you."

Josie giggled. "Well, I'm very sorry to hear that. Perhaps she wanted to repay me for the ball clothes."

Vivienne was also impressed. She shook her head, smiling. "Darling, how did you know I needed these?" she said, holding up a pair of expensive mage robes. "My dear, you really have an eye for these things."

The spymaster chuckled. "I'm glad you both like the gifts."

"Alright," said Josie. "I feel much better about you two visiting Orlais. Now, where were you up to in your recount?"

The spymaster shifted her position in the chair and smiled as she remembered the play they had watched. She gave them the details of it, as well as their time in Val Chevin and Cumberland. Leliana also told them about how Ria surprised her in the bathing chamber with the petals, the wine and the gifts.

Josie gasped at all the right moments.

Vivienne laughed. "Well, I am pleased to hear that Ria is doing so well. And also surprised. With that serious demeanour of hers, I had my doubts."

"Yes, but love has the power to change people," pointed out the Antivan advisor.

"That is certainly true," said Vivienne. "I mean, look at Leliana here. You are positively glowing, my dear."

Josie nodded in agreement, smiling. "Mm. I don't even recognize you Leliana. You've become a different person. It has been far too long since I last saw you laugh and smile so much. I don't even think you ever did, since the Blight ended."

Leliana gave her an apologetic look. "I'm sorry… I was still in mourning then, and being the Left Hand left little room for such emotions."

"No matter. You are happy now, and I am very glad for you."

"Thank you."

They talked some more about Val Royeaux, and she recounted their little argument.

Vivienne smiled slyly. "Well, I suppose it can't all be peaches and cream… I'm assuming you sorted it out since you're not here complaining."

Leliana laughed. "We do have our bad moments. But yes, we sorted it out." Then she shook her head as she remembered the injuries on Ria's hands.

"That stubborn woman," she told them, sighing. "She went to the barracks and hacked a dummy to pieces after we argued. When she came back, her hands were swollen and bleeding."

Josie raised her eyebrows. "Goodness! Was she that angry?"

"She told me the stress was getting to her, and I've been meaning to talk about this. I think it's better for Ria to take a rest from work- let the mages and healers take over."

Vivienne pursed her lips, tapping a finger on the armrest. "Well, we _are_ receiving more mages from Orlais, and if Morrigan can be persuaded to help, I'm sure we can manage."

Josephine nodded, frowning. "I had not realized she was having such a hard time." The advisor scribbled in her notes again, and turned to Leliana. "We will work things out, do not worry."

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Iron Bull gave a booming laugh, startling everyone at the tavern. One man spilled his ale.

"So you smashed that dummy to smithereens?"

Ria grinned, glad that someone could see the humorous side of things. "I was just a little stressed. It wasn't really about Leliana."

"I'd say _little_ is an understatement," said Varric, laughing. "It sounds like you need to take a break, kid."

"Maybe I do," said the surgeon, taking a swig of liquor.

"Well, you don't need to look far. If you ever need some harmless fun, join my chargers. They'll have something for you to do."

"Don't listen to him," said Varric, shaking his head. "They'll be sabotaging some poor guy's machines."

"Actually, we were going to join Sera in one of her games."

"Um…"

"Come on, there's no reason for you not to join." The Qun chuckled again. "Besides, you've earned my respect, Lewis. Having a quarrel with your wife? No problem! Let's just destroy a dummy!"

Ria grinned despite herself. "What can I say? Always ready for a good fight."

"Now _that's_ what I like to hear!"

"Speaking of a fight, we're going to be in one real soon. After the Venatori, we'll be marching to the Arbor Wilds."

"I guess I expected that." Dread twisted her gut.

"Relax, surgeon," said Iron Bull again, giving her a slap on the back. She nearly spit out her drink. "The battle won't come tomorrow. For now, I say we drink to a good song and a happy marriage!"

The surgeon smiled and wiped her mouth. With _Sera Was Never_ being sung in the background and thoughts of Leliana, things weren't looking too bad. She tried to ignore the possibility of inevitable, painful death in the final battle. The three clanked their tankards together and took long draughts.

"Ah! That's the stuff," said Iron Bull. Then he gave her a sly grin. "So tell me, is the spymaster as cold under the sheets as she is in front of us?"

Ria choked on the ale. Her face flushed down to her neck. Varric handed her a glass of water.

"Thanks," she said, taking a gulp. "You really want the details?"

Varric threw his hands up. "I didn't ask the question."

Iron Bull laughed. "Of course we want the details. It's the natural curiosity of any living, breathing Qun or dwarf. Or human."

Ria rolled her eyes. "Alright, you asked for it." She cleared her throat and lowered her voice. "She's _amazing_ in bed."

The two grinned, showing sharp canines. Iron Bull bounced his eyebrows and whistled. "I've heard she used to be a bard. Any… tricks of the trade she used to lure you in?"

Ria snorted. "For my first time- there wasn't any point _luring_ me in. When we were in Orlais, though…"

"Andraste's ass," said Varric, smirking. "I can already feel the sizzling atmosphere. You've grown, kid."

"Not really. She just looked damn hot."

Iron Bull whistled again. "What happened to our sensible and quiet surgeon?"

"Gone with her virginity," laughed Varric.

Ria laughed with them, still blushing.

"Nah, but that aside, you look happy. It's nice to see you've loosened up. I mean, you're _drinking_ now."

Iron Bull nodded in agreement. "That's one improvement I approve of. A little more and you'll be joining the others in no time."

"Thanks… I think. Look, when this is all over, I'll get you drinks. It will be on me."

"Now that's what _I_ like to hear!" said Varric, grinning widely. He lifted his ale to her. "To squashing Corypheus!"

"To squashing Corypheus!" echoed Iron Bull and Ria, a smile spreading on the surgeon's face.


	24. Chapter 22: Darkspawn Invasion

**Chapter 22: Darkspawn Invasion**

The green glow of veilfire in the darkness did little to calm the uneasiness in her.

Trevelyan knelt down to loot the body, and Ria felt her gaze drift to the dark blood smeared on the wall above him and the rusty chains hanging from the ceiling.

 _Wonder who… or what died to spill that much_ , she thought grimly.

Cassandra coughed, but even that small sound was carried through to the other passages, echoing off the slick stone walls. The only light available were the rays that came through occasional narrow slits in the ceiling. Otherwise they were plunged into pitch black.

Maxwell sighed. "Just another bracelet," he said dismissively.

"Try going through those gates," suggested Dorian.

They did, with Ria holding the veilfire torch. The light revealed a wooden table… or an altar of some sort. Dusty skulls lay on top, cracked and crumbling with age. She cringed when she saw the glassy outline of a centipede crawling out of an orbit. It snipped at the air with its mandibles and wriggled its forcipules before disappearing into the other eye socket.

"Charming," said Vivienne dryly.

Ria lifted the torch to observe the walls, which revealed a strange painted symbol.

"Any idea what this is?" Varric said, pointing to the wall.

"Most likely the work of Tevinter slaves," explained Dorian. "They're known to use pictograms that they scrawl on walls or under furniture. For instance, a clenched fist would symbolize a murderous master."

"And this one?" asked Iron Bull.

"That's… the extent of my knowledge, I'm afraid."

Blackwall grunted. "Well, this isn't really useful. Let's move on."

As they made their way through the dank passageways, Ria was relieved to see the rooms lightening from torches hung on the walls. Everywhere they went she saw the pictograms, sometimes painted entirely with a red dye… or blood. She couldn't really tell.

They had to be careful not to stumble and trip over the rubble that lay around the place, and walked around the blood that pooled under rotting corpses.

Finally, they reached a flight of stairs that looked cleaner than the rest of the cell. It led to a gate opening to the Guard's Hall. Before Ria could run in, she felt a hand pull her back.

"Not so fast, kid," said Varric. He jerked his head in the direction of a skeleton a few meters away.

"Right, mages freeze and we charge," said the Herald, readying his sword.

"Let's do this!" said Iron Bull, already moving.

The knight ran with the others as Vivienne and Dorian immobilized the ghouls. Cassandra and the Herald took care of the closest monsters while Ria, Blackwall and Iron Bull charged the larger group on the far corner. They were easy kill, and it only took her a couple of swings to crush each of them. After the area was cleared, they continued through the hall to meet another group of ghouls. The heroes quickly dispatched of them and came to a gaping hole in the wall, fire burning the wood and stones.

"The Darkspawn are coming up through here," said the Herald, peering into the dark tunnel.

"Well let's seal it before more join us," said Vivienne, walking up to what looked like a mega sized drain grate. Her hands glowed blue and the covering rose up with a creak, coming down again to block off the entrance. The mage dusted her hands.

"Knight-captain Rylen will see fewer Darkspawn now," she said, satisfied.

They all turned to go, heading for the Records Room. Varric sighed and let out a noise of frustration. Ria looked over to see him pulling at the crossbow.

"What's wrong?"

"Not sure," he said, frowning. "The upgrade you bought me should be quite stable, but it keeps coming loose."

Ria frowned with him. "Let me have a look at it."

Before she reached him, however, she felt a tapping on her left leg. The surgeon looked down to see her sword shaking violently.

"What's happening?" said Cassandra, alarmed.

"Some sort of earthquake?" suggested Iron Bull.

All around them dust and debris fell from the ceiling and there was a deep tremor in the ground. A particularly big block of stone landed right next to Ria's foot, blasting particles in her face. She coughed and jumped away from it.

"We've got to get out of here!" shouted Vivienne.

"It's the-" said Dorian as the blocked tunnel burst open to release an endless stream of Darkspawn.

 _Shit._

"Andraste's ass," said the dwarf.

"Fuck," said Iron Bull.

They all sprinted for the Records Room, dodging and fighting monsters on the way. Ria swiped at a Hurlock that seemed hell bent on cleaving her in two. She ducked and punched its face, following through with a crunching stab into its maxilla. It crumpled to the ground.

Ria wasted no time in following the others through the gate. Together, they all slammed it shut behind them as Vivienne and Dorian cast a spell to hold it closed. Ria felt cold sweat break out as she saw them- there were hundreds beyond it, leering and snarling. They shook the bars ferociously.

"Will that hold?" asked the Herald nervously.

"You'd better hope it does," said Varric. "Because I'm not coming back here to fight a hundred Darkspawn."

Vivienne shook her head. "I'm afraid this kind of force will break through in a matter of minutes."

Groaning, the heroes sprinted ahead to some stairs up to a small bridge. They crossed it and stopped in their tracks as another group of Darkspawn approached. Ria sighed when she saw the heavy armour and the corroded flesh of the Hurlock Alpha.

"That Hurlock will put up a fight," said Cassandra grimly. "Stand ready."

Ria nodded and switched to her two handed axe before speeding towards it.

"Maker take you!" shouted the Seeker as she swung her sword at the Darkspawn.

From the stairs, Vivienne launched a blazing boulder of fire at it. The Hurlock roared as it burned, the remainder of the flesh melting away to leave charred bone. Ria and the other warriors took the opportunity to hack at it, breaking bone and spilling blood. There were a few other Hurlocks in the area making a beeline for them. The Alpha was already occupied enough- Ria spun away to let fly a dagger at the minor Darkspawn. She caught it in the shoulder instead of the chest, but it staggered anyway. With a growl, the knight released a double swing at it, crushing its ribcage.

Then she choked as she felt bony fingers around her neck. Ria swung her axe backward, trying to hit the Hurlock. On the second hit, she heard its skull crack. It released its hold on her, and Ria doubled over gasping for air. By the time she recovered, there was another blow to her helmet. The surgeon blinked and shook her head. Ria barely dodged the sword as the other Hurlock snarled.

"Just-die!" she growled and buried her blade in its abdomen.

But her relief was short lived- a stabbing began in the side of her head.

 _Oh, crap no… not here!_

Ria doubled over and covered her eyes with a hand. Already the light in the room was too much for her. Then she felt multiple bodies shove her to the floor. Ria yelled out in panic as she drowned in the sea of Darkspawn that flooded the room.

"Ria!" shouted the Herald.

Everything was dark as Ria found herself smothered by the rotting bodies. She tried to use her axe but there was no room to swing the damn thing. It was like she was in a stampede.

 _No, no, no_ , she thought desperately.

Clutching her head, she crawled on the ground, getting kicked by fifty or so Darkspawn as she did. The pain was coming on stronger now, spreading across her whole head. Every stomp, every clanging of metal was like hearing fingernails scratching a blackboard. Groaning, Ria clawed her way… to where, she didn't know. But she had to get away, had to survive. She expected a blade to sink into her flesh any minute- but for some reason it never happened. After what seemed like an eternity, she opened her eyes to slits. The walls were blurry white but there was a darkness a few meters away in front of her. She tried to ignore the pain as she made out the massive barrier of Darkspawn at the door. There was no chance of getting through that.

Ria closed her eyes as new spasms of pain shot through her head. Maker, she couldn't even breathe properly. She tore the helmet off her head and chanced another look. There! She realized that the 'darkness' in front of her was another tunnel.

It was her only chance of survival.

The knight gritted her teeth and started crawling again, scraping her hands and arms on the sharp rubble. She kept expecting the Darkspawn to turn around and spot her but somehow she escaped detection.

Ria panted when she reached the tunnel, dragging the rest of her body into it. Compared to the brightness of the room, the dark passageway was bliss. But Ria knew there wasn't time to linger- they might find her here any moment. The knight pressed on, digging her fingernails into her temples.

There was no light in the tunnel, nothing to help her on her way. She didn't even know where it led to, but there was no choice. Besides, darkness wasn't new to her- it was her only reprieve. So she tried to find the way by feeling around. With difficulty, Ria stood and staggered about, touching the walls. But then doubled over again, wanting to cut off her own head. The pain was so intense that she thought she would lose consciousness.

Ria slipped to the ground, tears running down her cheeks. She surrendered to her despair, curling into a ball in the impenetrable darkness.

She was in a tunnel that led to Maker knows where, plagued by this cursed migraine… and the Darkspawn could come at any time. Not to mention her friends were out there fighting for their lives. It was all she could do to hang on…

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Varric cursed as he saw Ria sink under the army of Darkspawn. But there was no hope of getting to the girl. He let loose another bolt at the ghoul and it shrieked before falling. The other Darkspawn crushed it under their feet.

 _Woa,_ he thought. _They clearly don't look out for each other._

"Run!" yelled Vivienne, raising up a massive ice barrier.

 _Are you kidding me?_

"We can't leave Ria- she'll be crushed!" he yelled back.

The mage's usual poker face weakened and a pained expression crossed her face. "We can't get through this army!" she said, helping Dorian incinerate the next row of Darkspawn.

The Herald slashed at the emissary, growling in frustration. Cassandra took a blow to the shoulder and hissed, doubling over. Maxwell glanced at her in concern.

"I'm fine!" she said, backing up. "But Vivienne is right, we cannot stand against them."

Dorian shook his head sadly. "We can only hope she has somehow escaped."

"I hate to agree, but they're right," said Iron Bull, snapping a Hurlock's neck in two.

 _Shit, what am I going to tell Leliana…_

The dwarf looked at the endless crowd of Darkspawn spilling out of the narrow opening and felt cold dread settle in his chest. Blackwall put a firm hand on his shoulder.

"We need to move, Varric."

Sighing, the dwarf ran with them. He had never been a devout follower of the Maker, but he sent a quick prayer anyway.

 _Please don't die on me, kid_. _You don't even have to buy me drinks at the tavern. Just stay alive._

"Move, move, move!" shouted Trevelyan urgently.

Varric felt his skin crawl at the hundreds of shrieks and snarls coming from behind them.

 _Heck, this is a nightmare_ , he thought as they neared a massive door at the end of the hall.

As if the army behind them wasn't enough, he could feel _and_ hear a teeth rattling tremor coming from the other side.

"Oh, great," muttered Iron Bull. "First the Darkspawn, then Ria and now this?"

"Brace yourselves," said Cassandra.

Maxwell knelt down quickly to take the key. The Darkspawn were nearly here, and the heroes flung the doors open and slammed it behind them with a boom. Violent banging and slashing rattled the door but it held. They all let out sighs of relief and hurried on to the other door. It opened out to a large courtyard littered with dead Venatori.

The team groaned when they saw the mountainous giant looming over them. Up close it was hideous, with mottled, dry purple skin that was covered in fur at the waist. Moreover, Varric couldn't help but notice the long tusks protruding from its jaws and the single blue eye on its head.

"Oh, _wonderful_ ," said Vivienne sarcastically, already charging up a spell.

"You all know what to do," said the Herald, taking his stance. The giant was approaching with thundering footsteps, hunger dripping from its jaws.

"Critical points, people!" yelled Dorian above the noise.

Varric felt a pang of guilt at those words. _That's what the kid always said…_

Everyone else must have felt the same thing, because they all faltered. Vivienne was the first to react.

"Aim behind its medial malleolus!" she shouted, zapping the giant. It roared but looked unharmed.

"Say what?" he shouted back.

"It's what Ria- oh, never mind! Behind the prominence of its ankle in the direction of the midline!"

 _Not really sure what that means._

The heroes charged again, slashing at its legs. Unfortunately, this was much different to their experience with the Pride Demon. The giant jumped up to an incredible height… coming back down with a crash that could destroy the whole building. Varric wasn't even close to it, and the force rocked him off his feet. Dazed, he got back up to find it swinging its arm at the Herald.

"Hey!" he bellowed, firing a bolt at the face. It didn't hit the eye, but it got the creature's attention.

The giant turned its angry gaze to the dwarf, baring its sharp teeth.

 _Uh oh._

He sprinted to the right and leapt over the fallen pillar as the giant brought its fists down where Varric was a second ago. Cassandra caught the giant's ankle with her chain, pulling it.

The chains wouldn't really do much, but it did pull its attention away from him and the mages.

Dorian activated a fire mine around the giant and the ground exploded with scorching flames. It roared and shook its burning legs about. Unfortunately, its skin was as tough as dragon scales. The giant kept advancing.

"Oh, it's angry now!" warned Iron Bull, tackling it from behind.

"Can we hold it still?" asked the Herald desperately, slashing at its thighs.

Vivienne shook her head. "Ice, fire, electricity… they can only do so much damage!"

"Well I need to stab behind it's… whatever you call it!" yelled Trevelyan as the giant stomped about.

Once again, they all toppled to the ground as it jumped.

Varric pushed himself up, groaning. His head felt like he'd had twenty hangovers.

"You've gotta be kidding me," he said. "Alright, that's it!"

The dwarf waved his arms about and shouted at the giant.

"What are you doing?" shouted Cassandra angrily.

Varric ignored her and trained his crossbow on the face. The giant's expression contorted into a furious snarl.

 _That's it, just a little more… just keep looking ugly for me._

It started stomping towards him, blue eye blazing.

 _Now!_

The bolt shot out from the crossbow, and it seemed that time stood still as it flew through the air. Then it buried itself in the eye with a horrible squelch and a burst of blood.

"Nice going, Varric!" said the Herald as the giant fell to its knees. Without hesitating, the Herald stabbed behind both its ankles and it collapsed on its back. Then he plunged the sword into its heart.

The heroes breathed out heavy sighs of relief, either leaning on their swords or staffs. Varric slung his crossbow on his back and wiped the sweat from his brow. As his pulse slowed and breathing evened, the adrenaline rush at the victory died down... replaced by the hollow feeling of loss.

 _You should have been here with us, kid_ , he thought, sighing.

He stood there numbly, watching the others shake their heads and stand in silence. The Herald was the only one who moved, helping Cassandra put some salve on her wounds.

Iron Bull came up to the dwarf, putting a hand on the shoulder.

"We couldn't stay back there, Varric."

"Yeah… I know, big guy." Varric sighed. "But do you think we could…?"

The Qun shrugged, his face grim. "I don't know. I wish I could say she had a chance but… I've had enough battle experience to know when to let a comrade go."

The dwarf remained silent for a few minutes before shaking his head. "I'm going back in there."

"Wait, what?"

Everyone stared at him incredulously. Vivienne struck her staff on the stones.

"Varric, we all know what it's like to lose someone. But it is _suicide_ to go back in there!"

"Then what do you want me to do!" he said angrily. "Just… _pretend_ like it never happened and chase after Servis?"

The rest of them looked at the ground uncomfortably. Iron Bull sighed and rubbed the back of his neck, shaking his head constantly.

"Yes! That is _exactly_ what we need you to do!"

"Well, I'm not going back to Skyhold to tell Leliana this news."

"Oh, and we're supposed to do this for you?"

"Maker's breath, we're not even sure if she's..."

Vivienne shook her head. "You saw the size of that army- even if she did somehow survive, we wouldn't be able to reach her."

"Fine!" he said, throwing his hands up in the air. "You all go on with the quest… you can do without me anyway," said the dwarf, turning his back on them.

"Well… maybe you're right," said the mage. "What exactly _is_ your role in the Inquisition? Aside from irritating Cassandra?"

Varric turned around again, laughing harshly. "Alright, ice queen. That is the final straw!" he said, drawing his crossbow.

The Seeker herself stepped in. "No! Varric," she said sternly. "Put that down. Vivienne is just trying to make you stay with us. Of course, she may have worded it better but-"

"Andraste's ass!" said Varric in frustration.

Cassandra continued. "She is upset like you are. _Everyone_ is upset." She shook her head. "But we must be strong now, more than any other time. The fate of the whole of Thedas is in our hands."

"She's right," said Blackwall. "There will be a lot of lives we need to sacrifice in this war. We have to let this go… for now."

Varric still glared at the mage but slung his crossbow on his back again. He walked down to the steps and sat down, his shoulders slumped. Iron Bull and the Herald joined him, staring at the ground.

Cassandra sighed and looked up at the sky while Vivienne stood there quietly.

"Such a young age…" said Dorian sadly.

Those words drove another nail into the dwarf.

They all spent the next few minutes in silence, with only the distant thumping of the door in the background. Finally, Vivienne sighed.

"Well, there's a chance they might tear down that door in an hour or so. Dorian?"

The Tevinter mage got up reluctantly. "I loathe what I am about to do…"

Varric didn't even look up as they walked into the building again, knowing what the plan was. There was a flash of light from behind, then the noises became muffled. Gradually… they stopped. And with the barrier, all hope of Ria escaping was eliminated.


	25. Chapter 23: Out of the Frying Pan

**CHAPTER 23: Out of the Frying Pan and Into the Fire**

It took a moment for Ria to realize she was in the tunnel after waking up.

 _Maker, I feel like I've been pummelled to death,_ she thought, groaning.

The headache was gone now, but it left a remaining sensation of tightness around her head. And she felt cold, spent and hungry.

Ria felt around for her helmet and got up slowly, shakily. She listened carefully for any movement- anything that could indicate Darkspawn activity. There were none.

 _That must have been all of them,_ she thought in relief.

But the issue now was getting out of Coracavus. With a jolt, she realized her friends may still be out there… or even dead. Ria shook herself. _No… they can't be. I have to believe it._

She would find a way out. She would find her friends. In order to do that, she had to leave this tunnel. With some trepidation, Ria exited the dark passage and stepped out onto the dusty marble floor.

When she did, she balked after seeing the army _still_ there, though they weren't all crowded together as before. Rather, they were scattered all over the place, patrolling the halls. The door was clear now, but there were at least forty or so Darkspawn in the room. She gritted her teeth. This was not good.

However… if she could get past them quickly, there was a door to the end of the hall she had glimpsed before the headache. After deliberating for a few minutes, she decided.

The knight took in a deep breath and braced herself. Then she sprinted as fast as possible towards the exit. The second she moved, Darkspawn from all directions ran at her. Ria tried to ignore them and approached the door, sweat breaking out. And then… yes! She timed it well and swung her axe at the Darkspawn as she shot out into the hall. Unfortunately, there were at least twenty Darkspawn there waiting for her.

"Maker's breath," she said aloud.

The sound alerted them and they all rushed for her.

 _Damn, I can't fight all of them…_

Panicking, she cast about for anything- just anything that could help her. Then she had an idea. Taking the shield off her back, Ria readied herself, praying that this amazingly stupid method would work. They were getting closer now, leering and cackling.

 _Here I go…_

She let it fly with a grunt, as it required much more strength than with a plastic Frisbee. To her surprise, it took out about half of them as the leading Hurlock fell back. It flailed its arms and toppled the ones behind it like dominoes. Before Ria could celebrate this victory though, she heard movement behind her and the rest of the Darkspawn in front were still advancing.

She gripped her axe and let out a war cry before charging at them. With as much power as she could muster, Ria crushed their skulls, cracked their ribcages and sliced their torsos. Left, right, front, back. They were coming from everywhere. She swung her axe around her like a whirlwind, hearing the satisfying _whumps_ as the blade hit the marks. It took her a few more rotations to fell them, but another wave of Darkspawn crashed into her after the ten died.

Ria narrowly dodged the incoming attack and tried to steady herself, dizzy from spinning.

 _Blast it, there's way too many!_

She backed away quickly, swinging her axe in front of her to deter them. Then she ran for her life.

When she got to the door, she felt numb with fear after tugging on the handle. It was locked. Or rather… looking up at the narrow cracks, she could see the hint of a magical glow. Someone had put up a barrier.

 _So they made it!_ She thought, relieved.

But her elation was short lived. Right behind her, she heard the whistle of a swinging blade. Ria ducked and the sword was buried in the door. She elbowed the ghoul and split its torso with the axe. Again, she fought the Darkspawn off, backing away to the wall.

 _Fuck… this is it,_ she thought grimly. _I'm not going to make it._

Then she thought of Leliana and a new surge of energy erupted in her.

If she was going to die, then she would go down fighting. With a feral growl, the knight hacked and slashed at her enemies. They were coming in like the sea now, wave after wave after wave.

There was absolutely no hope.

 _I told her I would never leave her..._

Ria kept swinging her axe, blood and gore covering every inch of her armour. Ria didn't even think, didn't even properly see them as she slashed, parried and crushed. She felt multiple blades bang against her armour and cut her under the plates. Gritting her teeth in pain, she returned furious swipes at them.

The crowd was overwhelming, and they pushed her back further and further until she hit the wall… or so she expected to.

Instead, Ria felt nothing but air behind her as she staggered. And once more, she was in darkness. But the monsters were pushing their way through now, trying to get to her. Ria realized with a shock that she was in another tunnel.

Without hesitating she sprinted through the darkness, stumbling and nearly tripping over several times. There was a frightening echo of snarls and grunts bouncing off the walls as the army squeezed through the narrow passageway. She heard herself wheezing with the effort, the armour starting to weigh her down. She was tired and she was also running out of time.

 _Please tell me this leads to somewhere…_

And her prayers were answered.

In the distance, she made out a faint glow to the left. Ria fervently thanked the Maker and barrelled on with renewed strength. She reached the end of the passage and turned sharply to the left. The knight nearly stumbled when she saw the source of the glow. It was a rift.

 _Oh, shit…_ she groaned inwardly.

But the Darkspawn were nearly here- she could hear the scuffling and animalistic grunts a few meters away. She didn't have a choice. The surgeon took a deep breath and jumped into the swirling green vortex.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 _Out of the frying pan and into the fire,_ thought Ria gloomily as she hid behind a huge boulder.

A small voice inside told her that at least she wasn't dead.

The knight sighed and leaned her head back on the rocks, exhausted. And the chilling atmosphere of the Fade didn't help at all- already she could feel herself slipping into a dark mood. A fine mist settled around her, obscuring her vision and also herself. That was about the only good thing in this situation.

But hiding would only provide temporary safety. She had to get out of the Fade… _again_.

With another sigh, Ria pushed herself up and hissed as she felt her wounds burning. She grimaced and looked around. All she could see was a never ending rocky landscape. To her left, there was a slope leading to an elevated area framed by pillars that reached the ceiling.

Ria felt her heart sink as there was nothing- no landmarks, no sign of anything that could help her find her way out. In the end, she decided to just take the slope.

The surgeon walked up to the area, cringing as her hand made contact with the slimy walls. She didn't want to know what the substance was. When she reached the top, Ria paused and looked around, expecting to encounter Darkspawn. Nothing jumped out at her. But to her disappointment, the path ended here. All she had was a good view of the rest of the Fade from this height.

Ria neared the edge and scanned the landscape. Because of the mist, a lot of it wasn't visible but she could make out some of the ruins and natural phenomena that were scattered around. But then she frowned. Her eyes drifted to a few foci of glowing green in the distance. Her heart pounded in excitement- could they be rifts?

The closest one was to the north east of the outcropping, about ten minutes away. A great wall on the right had been blocking her view of the area, preventing her from spotting it. With a new sense of hope, the knight bounded down the slope again. She hurried towards the direction, descending to the lower levels.

Along the way, she encountered some shades and Rage Demons- nothing too difficult. Unfortunately, just as she neared the rift, several footsteps shook the ground. Ria dove behind a rock and peered around it to see a few Pride Demons crashing about.

 _This was never going to be easy, was it?_

But another glance drew her attention to the smudge in the distance. Ria frowned and squinted at it. As the mist parted, her eyes widened as she saw the outline of a huge army of Darkspawn. It was even bigger than the one that pursued her. She moved her gaze to the right and her heart dropped down to the ground. It was the army back in Coracavus.

But this was not the most shocking part of the situation. She realized that there were _many_ more armies in the distance, entering or exiting the Fade.

 _So many rifts,_ she thought in horror. _Is this normal?_

There were much more than she had spotted from the vantage point. Ria tried to calm herself and considered her options: the nearest rift was a few meters away- she could run for it. Or, she could manoeuvre her way around to another one that was safer. But the surgeon was impatient and there was no time- besides, there could be an army waiting for her at the other rift.

Ria breathed in and, again, sprinted as fast as she could.

She knew it wouldn't be easy.

The two Pride Demons turned slowly but gave booming laughs, startling her. Electricity crackled in the air. She wasn't going to get there in time.

The surgeon whirled around and hit the ground, rolling away from the fists. She slashed at the Demon's calf with her axe but it turned again, unfazed. It kicked at her and Ria grunted as fresh bruises formed. The other Demon was coming now, raising its fists in the air.

 _Oh no you don't._

Ria rolled through its legs and straightened up. Without pausing she sliced behind the knees and brought the axe down on its skull as it kneeled.

The remaining Demon roared and sent a burst of electricity towards her. Ria dove out of the way just in time. She landed on her left shoulder and hissed as sharp pain lanced through. Grunting, she got back up… and staggered.

 _I'm too drained for this_. Ria glanced back at the rift, which was closer now, then back at the Demon. It was stomping towards her again.

The surgeon made her decision and ran for it, trying not to be weighed down by the armour. With one last burst of energy, she hurled her body into the rift again, praying that the Demon wouldn't follow her.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The gritty particles of the Western Approach had never been more welcoming to her.

Ria smiled weakly as she dragged her tired ass through the hot sands. The only problem was- she had no idea where to go. But escaping the Fade again was such a relief that she enjoyed a few more minutes of freedom. Stopping at a hill, she scanned the land again. It was all sand and dusty red rocks for miles around. The only hint of habitation was a dark, jagged smudge in the distance. But Ria was a bit near sighted and couldn't decide if it was a building or just a natural phenomenon. It was the only option.

The sun was high in the sky as she journeyed there, bearing down on her skin. She took off her helmet to let her head breathe, but instantly regretted it. The sweat came down like a downpour. She put it on again. Along the way she tried to keep to the shady areas, but these weren't easy to find. Moreover, shade or not, she was so parched that it made no difference.

By the time she reached her destination, Ria collapsed in relief. It _was_ a building- a kind of fort, by the look of it. She rested there for a while, too weak to move. But then the sun was getting unbearable and she dragged herself up to its ramparts.

What she didn't expect to find was a number of Venatori already inhabiting it. Ria groaned and drew her sword, arms too floppy to hold an axe. She growled and charged at the leader. The man looked at her in surprise as she dropped down. He held his staff up and threw a fire bolt at her, singeing her arm. Ria hissed and landed quick successive blows.

Then an arrow missed her by a finger's breadth.

 _Crap, I didn't see the archers._

But it turned out she didn't need to worry about them.

There was a solid _thump_ to the right and Ria chanced a look. The Venatori Marksman died on the spot with a bolt protruding from his chest.

" _Ria?_ " came the disbelieving voice.

Several other familiar voices joined him in expressing their shock.

The knight didn't even have a chance to reply as the Venatori leader swung his staff at her head. She ducked and pommelled his gut. He grunted and doubled over. Ria banged the side of his head with the flat of her blade and whacked his neck. The man collapsed, unconscious.

Finally, she looked around as the Inner Circle joined her in killing off the Venatori. Ria couldn't help the wide grin on her face as she saw Varric launching a bolt at a Marksman, Cassandra shield bashing a Venatori Brute, Blackwall and Iron Bull charging and the Herald hacking at a zealot. Vivienne and Dorian were activating fire mines or making blizzards. Ignoring her stinging wounds, Ria ran into the fray to help them.

After several minutes of effective combat, they all stood with dead Venatori around them, staring at Ria as if she came back from the dead.

"Hi everyone," she said with a weak grin.

Then the Herald came to steady her as she staggered, dizzy from dehydration and exhaustion.

Everyone seemed incapable of speech.

Varric was gaping at her, crossbow hanging limp in his hand. Then he ran and gave her a bear hug, slapping her on the back so hard she nearly fell.

"You came back, kid! You came back! I _knew_ you were too smart to die!"

"Thanks?"

"We're so sorry we left you back in Coracavus," said the Herald, guilt written all over his face.

The knight held up a hand. "No it's fine… you had no choice. I'm just glad you're all alive."

She grunted as Iron Bull crushed her neck in a headlock. Ria laughed as he let go.

"Good to see you alive, surgeon," said the Qun.

"Yeah, me too."

"Darling, I must confess I didn't think you would make it…" started Vivienne. "I want to apologize for giving up on you so soon... and, of course, leaving you there to the Darkspawn."

Ria laughed. "Don't worry about it, Vivienne. It doesn't matter."

Cassandra looked similarly contrite, coming up to give her a sisterly hug. "We are all very glad to see you here, Ria. It is good to have you with us."

Blackwall even came to shake her hand, as gruff as ever. "I don't do well with these things," he confessed, looking uncomfortable. "But, we're going to need you surgeon. Good to see you alive."

There was a sniffle and Ria stared at Varric. "… Varric, are you crying?"

"No," said the dwarf, laughing. "I just have sand in my eye... Of _course_ I'm crying! Do you know how worried I was?"

"Sorry to give you a scare," said Ria ruefully. "But I'm here now... and we can drink that worry away at the tavern. What do you say?"

Varric sniffed again and laughed. "Alright, kid." Then he rubbed his eyes. "Hey, I actually do have sand in my eyes. Can we please get out of this hellhole? I'm really missing Skyhold right now."

"I'm getting sick of it myself," said Ria, staggering again. "Do you guys have water?"

The Inquisitor handed her a wineskin.

Ria glugged it down and wiped her mouth, letting out a noise of content. "Just what I needed."

Everyone patted her on the back as they made their way out of Echoback Fort. The sun was still beating down on the sand and she was still thirsty, but Ria felt better than ever.

"Welcome back to the Circle, Ria," said Varric, grinning at her.

"Yes," said Vivienne. "Welcome back. And you can tell us all about what happened."

"All in good time," she said. "Right now, I could jump into ice cold water..."

"Hmm," said Dorian, thinking. "Perhaps we could arrange that for you."

Ria chuckled.

"Oh, and Varric?" she asked after a while.

"Mm?"

"Don't tell Leliana about this."

The dwarf looked at her as if she had horns sprouting out of her head.

"Girl, now _that_ would be suicide."


	26. Chapter 24: Troublemaker

**CHAPTER 24: Troublemaker**

"Right. I go in there, you get behind the door and let off the horn blower, yeah?"

"That's what you call this thing?" Ria asked, staring at the object in her hand. It was spherical at the base, tapering off to a narrow neck that opened at the end.

She had no idea what it was supposed to do, as Sera had given no explanation- a really vague one, maybe.

"Quick, she's coming!" The elf giggled and opened the door. Ria groaned when she saw it was Morrigan.

"Actually, I'd rather not-"

Sera pulled her into the room, and Ria had no choice but to crouch down and plant it there. The elf took the other end of the long string and tied it to the desk leg. Ria stood up and examined it- the string was virtually invisible. Then the elf was gone. The surgeon was left to deal with the consequences. Alone.

"Ser Ria. Might I ask _what_ you are doing in my room?"

The witch of the wilds stood in the doorway, crossing her arms.

"Just… looking around," she said lamely.

"That is interesting, because I distinctly remember locking the door."

 _Woops. Forgot about that._

"Well, I actually… came to… ask you a favour."

"A favour, did you say?" asked Morrigan, eyes still narrowed in suspicion. "Go on."

"I was planning on taking a rest from work- seeing patients and all that. Would you be able to…?"

"See an endless line of whinging and moaning humans and elves?"

"…"

Morrigan sighed. "Well, I suppose you have done this most of your life. If it is but for a while, I can see why not."

Ria relaxed, relieved. "Thank you. The healers would benefit from your knowledge."

"'Tis for the Inquisition… and for a friend."

The surgeon smiled, nodding. She hadn't expected this to be so brief and easy. But even Morrigan had to change over the years.

"It wouldn't go unrewarded."

The witch looked at her with stern golden eyes. "I should hope so. Knowledge of your world would be of great interest to me."

What she would want with _that_ , Ria had no idea. But she shrugged. "Alright. I'll tell you what I know."

"Brilliant," said the witch with a smile. "Now, if that is all-"

She didn't get very far. Ria held out her hand but the woman's leg met tension. There was a large 'pop' as the cork flew out and Ria heard the most deafening fart sound ever. It was like the blast of a horn, but more gaseous. The horn blower deflated, letting off the remainder of the gas and finishing off with a pitiful squeak.

There was an evil cackle in the distant corridor. Ria bit her fingernails, looking away from the witch's glare. She was unimpressed.

Crossing her arms again, she regarded the surgeon with a disgusted expression. "I never imagined that _you_ of all people would take part in such a childish past time. Least of all, with that _elf_."

Ria ran a hand through her hair. "Um… sorry. If I knew it would be you we were doing it on…"

The witch waved an airy hand of dismissal. "Be gone! I have much to do without you making a mess." She gestured at the yellow gas floating around. "Bear in mind that if you hadn't held out your hand, I would be reconsidering that favour of yours."

The surgeon nodded and fled. She caught up with Sera, who was doubled over in laughter in the garden.

"What the hell, girl?"

The elf wiped the tears from her eyes. "Did you see the witch's face? All twisted and frozen looking?"

"I had a very nice close up, thanks to you. I needed to ask her a favour, you know. She might have refused if I hadn't tried to help her."

"But she accepted, yeah?"

"Yes, but-"

"Then it's all good. I've seen witches, here and there. Magic scares me, it's scary shit. But they don't like my tricks. Weird, right?"

"Uh… and what does this have to do with-?"

"I'm saying, you and her are friends. That's what friends do."

"I guess…"

"Admit it, it was loads of fun. I can't w _ait_ to try it again," the elf said with glee.

Ria couldn't help it. She laughed. "Well, who's the next victim?"

"Oh, you'll love this one. Let's get blondie."

"Blondie?"

"You know, Mr serious-what's-his-tits. I bet he could use a laugh."

"Oh, you mean Cullen." Ria rubbed her chin. "You know… I think you're right."

Sera told her the plan: it was simple. The Commander would be overseeing the courtyard upgrade. They would plant the horn blower near the quarry, make it look like he was farting. It was so cruel, but the elf reassured her that she would reveal the prank to her audience.

"Alright," said Ria after a few minute's pause.

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When they saw the Commander in the distance, he was pacing around the quarry.

"Perfect," said Sera, smiling mischievously.

There were so many soldiers around that Ria was already regretting it.

"How do we get around them?"

The elf pointed to the merchant stands. "Sneak around that and then the rocks. Easy."

"You realize we're going to be linked by this string?"

"Well, do you want to be linked another way?"

"What do you mean?"

"Look at you, all serious. How did you manage to squeeze up to Leliana?"

"Why does that sound… not like what I think it means?"

"You know, that knightly stuff you were doing."

Ria blinked.

"Here, I'll show you. I just need a peach. A _ripe_ one."

"Oh God," said Ria, covering her eyes with a hand. "No thank you, Sera."

"Well I can't teach you bananas!"

"Let's just do the prank," said the surgeon, blushing furiously.

Ria sighed and they both reached the stands. The merchant there greeted her without any suspicion.

"Hero of Ferelden," he said with a smile.

"Er… Hello."

Trying not to meet his eyes, Ria paced around and took the chance when he was preoccupied by a customer. Sera joined her as she manoeuvred around to the quarry. Cullen was only a few inches in front. Carefully, she placed the object by his feet. Sera slipped into gap in the crowd with the string like an expert. The Commander never saw her as she tied it to a bush on the other side.

Ria started to walk back, to avoid being seen. It was then that Cullen spotted the elf. He frowned, instantly suspicious. She cackled and stuck out her tongue. The Commander shook his head and continued to pace, reading the list he had with him.

Unfortunately, he stepped right into the trap. Again, Ria's eardrums nearly burst from the loud noise. Everyone in the marketplace stared in the direction of the sound. Cullen's face went bright red.

He was speechless.

People tried to fight down smirks. Younger girls failed to smother giggles. The more sensible mothers hid their smiles politely behind their hands.

Sera cackled and pointed at him, stomping her feet on the ground hysterically. Ria felt a laugh bubbling up as well, and stepped back- only to bang into the logging stand. Even Sera stood gaping as the logs fell down, rolling at full speed to the market stands.

 _Oh, shit…_

The surgeon was powerless to do anything as they crashed into the tables, toppling them. People gasped, some laughed and the merchants glared at her furiously. Ria covered her face with a hand and ran for her life. There were angry shouts all around, but Sera was laughing like a maniac now, following Ria.

"That was brilliant! I knew you had it in you!"

"That wasn't exactly planned."

"Who cares! You took out that whole row of stands!"

Ria groaned. "Don't remind me," she said, but felt a silly smile breaking out. She walked up the steps to the battlements.

"You, me. We should do this again sometime. Fun things happen when you're around."

"I don't think so," came a voice from the top of the steps.

Ria looked up to see her wife standing like a dark sith lord. Her hood was up and the material of her armour was flapping in the wind in a threatening way. She descended to them, eyes narrowed at Sera.

"Oops. You're going to get it now," cackled the elf.

With an iron grip, Leliana took Ria's arm and pulled her away.

"See you later, surgeon! I'll be at the tavern if you want to do it again."

Ria waved at her and quailed under the spymaster's glare.

"Alright, sorry. I got pushed into it by Iron Bull." But she couldn't stop the silly grin on her face. "It was a good laugh, though."

Leliana sighed, shaking her head. "I didn't know you had this side to you. Josie is going to be so mad when she hears about this." She gave Ria a severe look. "Thank you for all the complaint letters I will be reading tonight."

Ria kissed her lips, laughing at the look of surprise on her face. "You're welcome. I promise I'll make it up to you."

The spymaster raised an eyebrow but a small smile appeared. "You're _very_ strange today. So reckless."

"Maybe I just want to have a little fun."

Ria swept her wife off her feet into her arms.

"What are you doing? Put me down!" Leliana hissed, looking around at the sentries. The soldiers coughed.

"Fine, if you don't want to be seen…" Ria headed for the small room at the top.

"You-"

Ria silenced her with another kiss. Opening the door with her foot, she finally let the woman down. Leliana smoothed out her clothes.

"You were saying you would make it up to me?" she asked, arms crossed.

Ria closed the door behind them, smirking at the expressions on the soldiers' faces.

"I did indeed."

 _ **Just thought Ria could use a bit of a laugh... and to show that she actually has a sort of mischievous side to her. Also, I've only ever mentioned Sera once in the story- there are just too many characters that I never had the chance to include her. Hope you enjoyed this mini chapter ;)**_


	27. Chapter 25: Last Game of Wicked Grace

**CHAPTER 25: Last Game of Wicked Grace**

They were back in the war room, and Josephine wasn't pleased.

"Whatever made you make such trouble? This is not like you, Ria."

Cullen sighed. "And now everyone thinks I…"

Ria gave him an apologetic look. "Sorry about that Commander…" She turned to Josephine. "That last part wasn't planned, I swear."

Varric and Iron Bull snickered.

The advisor pursed her lips but relented. "Well, in any case, there has been some damage that needs to be repaired. Not to mention the merchants are very upset."

Leliana sighed. "We'll work it out somehow. In the meantime, I have some good news- Lord Enzo was not at the storehouse, but we finally found him. With Zevran's help, he has been captured and will be trialled."

"That _is_ good news," said Cullen, forgetting about his previous embarrassment.

Cassandra tapped a finger on the map, pointing to the Western Approach. "And we have cleared Griffon Keep and Coracavus."

Josie nodded. "With these out of the way, we can focus on preparing for battle."

"Speaking of Coracavus," said Ria. "I need to tell you about what I saw in the Fade."

Cullen, Josephine, Leliana and Solas stared at her.

"You entered the Fade again?" asked the former Templar.

"This wasn't in the report," said Leliana, frowning. "And you said what _you_ saw in the Fade. Do you mean to say you went alone?"

 _Me and my big mouth_. Varric made a cutting motion at his neck.

"Sorry, I meant: what _we_ saw in the Fade."

Leliana gave her a suspicious look.

"Anyway, there's something strange going on in there," said the knight, trying not to meet that shrewd gaze. "That army of Darkspawn in Coracavus wasn't the only one- there are thousands teeming in the Fade. Rifts were opening everywhere… this isn't normal, is it?"

Morrigan frowned, angling her head. "No, 'tis unusual to see so many Darkspawn gathered together in one place…"

" _Another_ problem we need to add to our list then," sighed Cullen, irritated. "We've sealed the Breach and now we have these rifts spitting out armies of Darkspawn!"

"This is very serious news," said Josephine, shaking her head. "If we are not careful, the numbers could be overwhelming."

"Have you heard no other reports, Leliana?" asked Vivienne.

"Aside from Coracavus, one other army has appeared in Emprise du Lion."

The Herald sighed. "Then we're going to have to go seal that rift."

" _And_ fight that army," said Cassandra. "This is a great hindrance to our preparations."

Cullen looked ready to punch something. "We don't have time for this. Corypheus is marching to the Arbor Wilds even as we speak!" Then he seemed to calm himself down, sighing. "This will have to wait- some of our forces are over there. They will need to take care of it."

"Then that leaves only our alliances to sort out." The spymaster turned to Josephine. "Any news from the other nations?"

"Not all have replied, but the Antivans, Nevarrans and Free Marches have promised their support."

Dorian stepped forward. "We've also managed to contact some Tevinter nobles who I have connections with. They have agreed to lend us their forces."

"Good," said Cullen, relaxing. "Then we're on the right track. But until we have their responses, we can't move our army. Josephine, send word to Orlais about the location of our camp."

Josie nodded.

"Now. Morrigan," said Leliana. "You were saying that, with the Eluvian, Corypheus can enter the Fade in the flesh?"

"Indeed. The Inquisitor and Ria can attest that these artifacts still work if one knows how to use them."

"What happens when Corypheus enters the Fade?" asked Cullen.

Morrigan turned her golden eyes on him. "Why, he will gain his heart's desire. And take the power of a god."

A grim silence descended on the room.

" _Or_ ," started the witch, making everyone jump. "- and this is more likely- the lunatic will unleash forces that tear the world apart."

"I'm hoping neither of that happens," said Varric.

"Yes, but pardon me for interrupting. Does this mean that _everything_ is lost unless we get to the Eluvian before him?" asked Josie, worry in her eyes.

Cullen sighed. "Corypheus has a head start, no matter how quickly our army moves."

"We should gather our allies before we march."

"Can we wait for them?" said the spymaster dubiously. "We should send our spies ahead to the Arbor Wilds."

Cullen stared at her. "Without the support of the soldiers? You'd lose half of them!"

"Then what _should_ we do?" demanded Josie.

"To start off with, don't let Corypheus worry you so much. That doesn't help anyone," said Herald, shaking his head. "Josephine, have our allies send scouts to meet us in the Wilds. Leliana, your fastest agents can join them there. The spies will have to be enough to slow down Corypheus' army until Cullen's soldiers arrive."

Morrigan let out a soft laugh. Then she cleared her throat when the Herald blinked at her. "Such confidence. But the Arbor Wilds are not so kind to visitors. Old elven magic lingers in those woods."

"Then lend us your expertise, Lady Morrigan," said Josephine.

"'Tis why I came here… although it is good to see its value recognized."

Trevelyan nodded. "Alright. Any additional input?"

The Commander looked around at the others. "Inquisition, it's been good working with you. Maker knows how we got here, but beyond this is victory and freedom for us all. Let us make the last fight count."

At the thought of the final battle, everyone seemed subdued.

"Well, I guess this is it," said Dorian.

"Indeed," said Vivienne, sighing.

"It's been good fighting with you, Commander," said the Herald, nodding. "It's been good fighting with you all. As the Inquisitor, I couldn't have asked for better companions."

Varric clapped him on the back. "You've done well, Trevelyan. Being marked as the most wanted criminal, then joining the Inquisition and leading us. Crazy things have happened… and you did alright."

Trevelyan laughed. "Thanks, Varric."

"Just don't die out there, Herald," said the Seeker, looking away.

Maxwell gave a small smile and hugged her to him. Everyone either smiled or coughed at the display of affection. The stoic Seeker looked embarrassed but leaned into the embrace.

Iron Bull sniffled. "Aw, you're making me all soft now."

"Psh. You were always a softie," said Varric. "Stop hiding it."

Everyone laughed.

Ria felt a pressure on her shoulder and jumped to see her wife leaning her head on it. The knight put her arm around her. Words weren't needed- they knew what the other would say.

The two watched their friends as they laughed, joked and bantered.

Even in the midst of war, even in the darkness of evil…. There was friendship. There was love.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Well, here we are again," said the dwarf, popping open the cork of the bottle.

Ria took it from him and had a long draught. The taste was almost sweet tonight.

She laughed. "What was it you said again? Nothing like a good bottle of ale and a chair under the stars?"

Varric hi- fived her. "Yep, good memory you got there." He took a long sip of his own and made a noise of contentment. "You know… I didn't think this day would come so fast."

"Yeah," agreed Ria, looking up at the winking stars. "To be honest, I'm still trying to swallow the idea of all this happening."

He chuckled. "Oh, yeah. You must be: waking up in a different world, nearly getting killed multiple times and finding out you're the reincarnated Hero of Ferelden. It's enough to twist anybody's knickers."

"That's one way of putting it," snorted Ria. "But you know what?" she said, gazing at the depths of the sky.

"What?"

"I don't regret it. Any of it."

The dwarf showed his teeth, grinning. "Probably because of a certain spymaster."

Ria grinned with him, but then turned serious. "I never imagined we would be together. She's everything I ever wanted in a woman." She took another swig. "And considering what she's been through… I'm still not sure I deserve her. Maker," she said quietly. "She's like... she's like this bottle. All hard glass, but one drop on the ground and it shatters."

Varric sighed. "Yeah... I don't know all the details but I've heard she's been through hell and back."

The surgeon nodded, taking another drink to ease the ache in her throat. No matter how many times she heard the story, each retelling made her want to kill every person who ever hurt Leliana. She sighed and turned to the dwarf again.

"But it's not just Leliana, it's _everything_. It's… I've been very lucky to have met all of you."

"Awww," said the dwarf, smiling. "You're making me feel warm and fuzzy inside."

The surgeon chuckled. "No, really. You've all changed me for the better. You don't know what I was like before coming here."

"I know you're being sincere, kiddo," he said fondly. "But actually, I _can_ imagine what you were like before this."

"You do?"

"Sure. You remember when we first met in the Hinterlands?"

"Er, yes."

"You were so serious and withdrawn that if I shot you with Bianca, you would probably just take it out and glare at me."

Ria burst out laughing. "As if that could happen."

"No, seriously. But a game of Wicked Grace always loosens people up."

"Yeah, that was a good game," said Ria, smiling at the memory.

The dwarf smiled. "What I _didn't_ expect was that you would win." He shook his head. "I lost fifteen silvers that day."

Ria chortled. "Sorry about that. I could give that back if you like."

"Nah, keep it. Besides… we don't know what's going to happen tomorrow. I'd rather you hold on to it."

"Varric… we're going to make it. I've played the game, remember?"

"Ria, I know you're a prophet and everything but a lot can change. This is war, this is life."

Ria looked at him for a moment. "Alright. Things might be different, but I'll pray that you make it. You were one of the first people to hold a hand out to me. If you were gone, I don't think I could ever play Wicked Grace again."

The dwarf considered her seriously for a moment. "Thanks, Ria. I don't think I could ask for a better friend." Then the grin came back. "But promise me you'll keep playing cards."

Ria rolled her eyes. "Yeah… alright."

"That's the spirit," Varric laughed. "Say… how _did_ you come to play so well?"

The surgeon rubbed the back of her neck. "Um… you really want to know?"

"Yep, go for it."

"I used to gamble."

Varric blinked, and then burst out laughing. "Seriously? I didn't think you were the type!"

"No, really," said Ria seriously.

The dwarf stopped when he saw her face. "There's a story behind it, isn't there?"

Ria fidgeted with the bottle of ale before nodding, staring at the ground. "Yes."

"Do you…. Want to talk about it?"

The surgeon let out half a snort, half a laugh. "I already have with Leliana. But… I think you deserve to know."

"Well, today might be your last chance."

"Yeah…"

And Ria told him.

When she finished, she expected to feel anger and bitterness. It didn't come. Ever since she poured her heart out to Leliana, the bulk of her pain had disappeared. Now, there was only a dull sadness throbbing at the base of her chest. Varric sighed and patted her back.

"Kid… you've been through a lot."

Ria laughed. "You could say that. But after living here, nearly dying so many times… I feel like it kind of pales in comparison."

"Hey, losing family is always a knife to the gut. You can't help that. _Especially_ in your situation… I don't think I could've done anything in your place. Give me a crossbow and I can shoot to save lives. But give me surgical tools? That would be the end of the world."

The surgeon sighed, shaking her head. "But the worst part was that I hated him. I hated him for all those years… and then I let him go in such a bad way."

Varric patted her again. "Ria, you did your best. A lot of people have grudges against their parents. What matters is that you got back up- I'm proud of you for doing that."

Ria looked the dwarf in the torchlight. "Thanks, Varric… that means a lot to me."

"No problem. Though… that story about seducing the boss' daughter to get your research approval sounds like something a bard would do," said Varric slyly.

The surgeon put a finger to her lips. "She didn't mean anything to me. I told you, I was… a bit crazy then. And I didn't _seduce_ her. Don't tell Leliana about this."

"Don't tell me what?"

Ria cringed as she turned around. The dwarf looked similarly awkward.

"Uhhh, Ria here was just talking to me about… about a surprise she had for you!"

 _Nice save, Varric._

Leliana narrowed her eyes, suspicious. "Are you sure? It didn't look like you were discussing something particularly pleasant."

Fortunately, Ria _did_ have a surprise for her.

"I actually do have something to tell you."

At the sudden change in tone, her wife looked at her curiously. "Oh?"

The surgeon smiled at her, shaking her head.

"Not now… I'll tell you later."

"Yep, I agree with her. You two need to join me in a game of Wicked Grace."

At this, the couple stared at him.

"Isn't it a bit late for that?" asked Ria.

"The whole team is coming," chuckled the dwarf. "You don't want to miss out on it."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"I do hope I recall all the rules. It's been ages since I've played a game of Wicked Grace," said Josie uncertainly.

"You'll be fine," said Leliana, laughing.

"Are three drakes better than a pair of swords? Urgh, I can never remember," said Cassandra.

The dwarf shook his head. "Seeker, remember how I said, "Don't show anyone your hand"? That includes announcing it to the table."

"We playing cards or what?" grumbled Iron Bull.

Varric sighed. "There's always someone asking last minute questions."

Cullen looked around at everyone, his lips twisting. "Well, you seem to have enough people. I have a thousand things to do."

"Losing money can be both relaxing and habit forming. Give it a try," said Dorian helpfully.

Ria snorted and Cullen glared at him.

Varric laughed. "Curly, if any man in history ever needed a hobby, it's you."

"We talked about that once, didn't we Ria?" asked Leliana innocently, nudging the surgeon.

"We did?... oh, wait."

Everyone looked at them curiously.

"Go on, Leliana. We would all like to hear it," said Vivienne, eager to hear more gossip.

Cullen narrowed his eyes and crossed his arms.

A sly smile curved the spymaster's lips as she looked at the cards in her hand. "Oh, we were just saying how he would be with a lover already if… he kept his eyes above the neckline."

The Commander's face flushed hot red.

The rest of the crew guffawed.

"I-I," he spluttered. "I do _not_ do such a thing!"

"Actually, come to think of it," said Varric. "I _have_ seen you staring at women's breasts."

"I've seen him do it as well!" said Josie, shaking with mirth and pointing at Cullen.

Vivienne's lips twitched as she tried not to laugh and the men doubled over in the corner.

Sera cackled. "Blondie's a pervert!"

With each second Cullen's face grew redder. He buried his face in his hands.

The Herald was the first to recover. "I never expected _you_ to enjoy it, Commander. And the look on your face. Priceless!"

"But that is not all," said Leliana, a wicked glint in her eye. "It seems someone _else_ enjoys the same hobby."

This was unexpected. Everyone blinked in surprise, still wiping tears from their eyes.

 _Wait… oh, shit._

Ria felt her face grow burning hot. There was a silence as the Inner Circle took in her colour. Then they all burst out laughing. Leliana giggled next to her. Even the Seeker couldn't stop the laugh escaping her hand. Cullen looked a little better than before.

"Alright," growled the surgeon. "If you're all done laughing, can we start playing?"

Josie cleared her throat, but was still smiling. "Dealer starts. Oh… I… believe… I'll start at…three coppers! Do you think that's too daring? Maybe I'll make it one… no! Boldness! Three it is!"

"Josie… you are one of the most indecisive people I've ever met," said Ria.

Leliana laughed. "You haven't seen her at her worst."

There was a clinking of coins as Iron Bull slammed his fist down. "Seriously? Who starts with three coppers? Silver, or go home."

Blackwall pushed his own coins forward. "Sounds good, I'm in."

Dorian smiled. "The bolder the better right? I'm in."

The others murmured their agreement and pushed their coins in.

"Me too," said Varric. He glanced at the Inquisitor. "Well, are you in?"

Trevelyan shrugged. "Why not? But… just remember I'm still new to this game."

"Don't worry, you'll pick it up in no time."

And the game was on.

Ria didn't even notice the time fly, and when the second game was over, the candle was reduced to a sad sludge of wax.

"And I win," the surgeon said, grinning. "Again."

"What!"

"No fair!"

"You're cheating, aren't you?" demanded Iron Bull.

Ria laughed. "You're a bit of a sore loser, aren't you?"

Varric laughed with her. "Don't worry about him. He likes to get what he wants."

The Qunari grumbled silently to himself in the chair.

"Anyway, I think we need a new candle," said Varric, getting up. "I'll come back in a minute."

"Oh, I'm going to get you next time," Leliana said to Ria with narrowed eyes.

"And how are you going to do that?" said Ria, smirking and leaning closer to the woman.

The spymaster raised an eyebrow, her sensuous lips curving up. She tapped Ria's nose with a long finger. "I have my ways."

"Okay, guys," said Herald, laughing. "We can feel the tension already. Save that for the bedroom."

"What are you talking about?" asked Iron Bull, the game forgotten. "This is one thing you _don't_ want to miss."

"Yeah, come on, Herald. Two girls getting hot and steamy? It's every guy's fantasy," said Varric.

Dorian's moustache twitched. "Not _every_ man's fantasy."

Vivienne sighed, tapping the table with her staff. "Boys, _behave_. Whatever happened to propriety in this day and age?"

"Men will always be rude and reckless, I'm afraid, Vivienne," said the Commander, leaning forward in his chair. "Shall I tell you of what happened in my Templar days?"

"Oooh, this sounds good," said Sera.

Everyone leaned in to listen as he told the story.

By the time Varric came back, the room was pitch black. But it didn't matter, because every member was telling a story of their own.

"What are you all talking about in the dark?" asked the dwarf, taking his seat.

"Stories, Varric," said Ria. "Got one?"

"Hmm… let's see. Yep, did I ever tell you about the time we broke into Chateau Haine?"

Everyone shook their head.

The dwarf's teeth shone sharply in the candlelight. "It started, like most capers do, with a trap…"

Again, time went by like a bullet train as Varric told his story.

"And then Hawke looks up and says, "Looks like the duke… has fallen from grace.""

" _That's_ how Duke Prosper died?" said Josie, eyes wide. "You know, that's almost perfect for him."

The surgeon nodded. "That man deserved it."

"Oh, right," said the Antivan. "You played the game before."

"Yes, I did," said Ria, already yawning. "Are we having another round? I'm ready to hit the bed."

"Not yet, Surgeon," said Varric, shuffling the cards. "One more, and I promise you it will be a good one," he said, winking.

By the end of it all, Leliana _did_ win. But that wasn't the main part of it. Everyone tried not to snigger as the Commander sat naked in his chair. He glared at Varric.

"Don't say a word, dwarf."

"I tried to warn you, curly," chortled Varric.

" _Never_ bet against the spymaster, Commander," said Leliana with a triumphant smile.

Cassandra shook her head and stood up. "I'm leaving. I don't want to witness our Commander's walk of shame back to the barracks."

"Well, I do!" piped in Dorian.

Ria laughed and shook her head.

"Well, we all know what _your_ fantasies are," said Iron Bull.

It was Dorian's turn to flush a deep red, clearing his throat.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Leliana lay in bed, taking in the bold outline of the surgeon.

She ran her fingers over those dark eyebrows, that adorable nose, that smooth cheek, the soft lips.

Her dead lover come back to life.

Ria was also awake, propped up sideways on her elbow. She took the spymaster's hand and kissed it, eyes dark and haunting in the shadows.

Leliana found herself thinking back to her earlier life. Her life in Lady Cecilie's home, her mother… the days when she would walk with her through the gardens, the smell of her grey linen dress. Then the devastation when the Maker took her away. And as the hand of darkness touched her youth, she remembered her newfound joy in stories and ballads, the way Marjolaine's worldliness drew her in through exciting promises. It was a long stream of pointless conquests after that- playing the Game by plotting, lying, stealing, seducing…

Then to be deceived by the one she loved, left to die in the deepest of dungeons. Forgotten, abandoned. She had lost everything she ever had.

But then she had stumbled into the chantry, welcomed by Dorothea. And there, she had started a new life. She remembered meeting Kallian for the first time. The others had scoffed at her visions, echoing the contempt she bore from the Sisters. But the elf… she had listened with those mysterious dark eyes. Looked at her with a hint of curiosity.

Height was but a minor detail- the confidence, the purpose in her strides, the flashing eyes. They were the characters of a born and bred warrior. And she had led them through countless battles, passion behind that mechanical exterior. But what had captured the bard's heart was her endearing awkwardness, the quiet sincerity of her emotions. So with a fluttering chest, Leliana had accepted the flower- a gift she would always remember.

And then... this too was not to last.

Leliana closed her eyes as she felt, again, the agony of that moment. The memory of those empty dark eyes, as if swallowed by the darkness of the void. Months grew colder, years were nightmares that she couldn't escape. Justinia, her friends, her agents… one by one they would slip away into the night, never to return.

She opened her eyes again to gaze at the pale face in front of her.

No, she would not lose another.

 _Not Ria,_ she begged the Maker. _Not her. Anything but her._

Ever since their first meeting, Leliana's life had changed.

Now she looked forward to every morning, to the sun's rays lighting up Ria's face. And she thanked the Maker for the miracle each day brought.

 _Kallian…_

The surgeon's eyes held so much love it was clear as a mirror. Slowly, she leaned in to kiss her lips. Leliana held the back of Ria's head, feeling that soft hair. Hair that she had been waiting a decade to touch. Their kisses were slow and gentle. As if every one of them was a word, a part of an unspoken sentence.

 _You and I, forever._

Tonight… there was no teasing, no seduction. There was no need.

Leliana felt so much in her heart right now. So many emotions welling up that she felt her heart would crack. Despite the confident words she had said before- to let the Maker take care of the future… perhaps it was human nature to doubt.

"I am afraid," she whispered.

Ria paused and looked her with those serious eyes. "I won't let them hurt you."

Leliana shook her head. "I am afraid for _you_."

To her surprise, the surgeon smiled. "I will live. Believe it, Leliana. The Maker will protect us."

"You have changed so much," said the spymaster, cupping her cheek.

"I had to. For you, I had to." Then she paused, dark irises depthless in the moonlight. "Leliana..."

"Yes?"

"I hope you know... I will never stop loving you. I will love you till the day I die."

Leliana's eyes grew blurry again. She leaned in to kiss Ria's lips, putting her arms around her neck urgently. The surgeon slipped her arms around the woman's waist. Leliana pressed herself close to Ria's body.

"Don't be afraid," murmured Ria.

From all her conquests in Orlais till now, no one had ever given her so much. She felt valued, prized, cherished.

In the comforting night, in the stillness… nothing was more beautiful than their love.

Finally, the spymaster lifted her head to look at Ria, who was closing her eyes contentedly. She stroked Ria's cheek and her wife opened her eyes again.

Leliana smiled fondly, fingering the lashes. "Still like little butterflies, I see."

Ria's expression changed and she chuckled. "You can't be serious… you know I didn't like that comparison."

The spymaster laughed with her, but there was a pain in her chest she couldn't dispel. "But they are- I want to catch them in a jar, keep them forever," she whispered.

Ria shook her head, snorting. "I would have no eyelashes."

"Oh, I don't mind," said Leliana, kissing her lips.

The surgeon smiled into the kiss.

"Tell me the surprise you had for me," said the spymaster when she drew back.

The surgeon blinked. "Oh, right. I suppose I should tell you." She cleared her throat. "It's not really a _surprise_. I've… applied for adoption."

Leliana bolted up in bed, staring at her. " _Adoption?_ "

"Erm, I hope you're okay with it. We can cancel at any time but-"

She didn't finish her sentence because Leliana swooped down with a kiss.

"Ria, I would _love_ to have a child. I've always wanted to start a family- with you."

The surgeon grinned up at her.

"You know… I still don't get how this all happened," she said, half laughing. "Sometimes I wonder… did I ever live in that other world? I feel like my real life started here… with you."

Leliana smiled tenderly and bent down for another kiss.

"It _is_ real. It's all real."


	28. Chapter 26: The Battle Begins

**CHAPTER 26: The Battle Begins**

Banners whipped in the wind as the Inquisition marched. Thousands of armoured feet clanked and rattled on the ground. Ria marched with them at the forefront, a hand on the pommel of her sword. With the blacksmith and mage's help, they had it upgraded markedly- it was imbued with magic so that it flared up hot with fire. The blade was now an alloy of silver and stormheart, more than double its previous strength.

Adrenaline pumped her blood so much she could feel every pulse in her body. This was it. This was the final battle.

Men followed behind her, faces also set and subdued. On the walkway above them, she saw Cullen watching the sea of soldiers, mouth stiff with tension. He caught her gaze and gave her a brief nod.

They marched through the forest, giant trees surrounding them. Apart from the crashing sounds of armour in the air, there was strange birdsong coming from the canopies. It was green everywhere, and Ria had never seen such wildlife before. In the distance, she saw the pointed tops of tents in their camp. The area was already busy with activity.

When they neared, she saw Empress Celene with her guards by a tent, Josephine on the right and Leliana with her agents on the left. She raised an eyebrow at the Empress' clothes- even here she was wearing her ceremonial dress. Seeing Trevelyan approach, a woman ran to them.

"Inquisitor!"

"How goes the battle, captain?"

"We're holding, barely." The captain's face looked worn out. "The Red Templars are fighting harder than ever with their master nearby…and our scouts saw Corypheus travelling toward an elven ruin to the north. We can clear you a path through his armies."

The Herald looked doubtful. "So all you have to do is fend off Corypheus' worst zealots until I've returned?"

The captain held a fist under her collarbone. "We shall not flinch, your Worship! Not a one of us. Andraste guide you, Inquisitor." She bowed and strode away.

Morrigan drew closer. "If your scouts report accurately, I believe these ruins to be the temple of Mythal."

"Which is?"

"A place of worship out of elven legend. If Corypheus seeks it, then the Eluvian he covets lies within."

Suddenly in the background, there was a scatter of explosions. Everyone turned to see the source of the sound.

"Come on, let's go plug some arseholes!" shouted Sera.

Ria wrenched her sword free of its scabbard, the metal sliding out with a clean peal. Her men drew their own swords, following her to the hills. On the right, Trevelyan charged with the rest of the Inner Circle. Before reaching the main path and disappearing into the forest, Ria paused to glance back at her wife, who met her eyes from a distance.

The knight saluted her for the last time before joining her soldiers.

Along the path, the fight was messy as dozens of Red Templar Horrors made a beeline for them. Her friends were having trouble as they all clung to the team like leeches. Ria did her best to rip them off and aid her soldiers at the same time.

Cullen was right in saying there would be no time for a surgeon in this battle. She was kept so busy that she had no chance to even pull out a poultice for Cassandra. The Seeker grimaced and held a hand to a deep cut in her arm but shook her head when Ria glanced at her.

"I will manage," was all she said.

Ria couldn't even nod because another Horror was trying to pummel her. She growled as her sword glanced off its red lyrium spikes. Ducking the next blow, she drove the blade tip into its chest. With a roar it collapsed. She looked around to see her men engaged with the other foes. Fortunately, they were fast diminishing, leaving her soldiers to surround each one as a group.

Trevelyan wasted no time moving forward when he saw they were all dead. Together with her soldiers, Ria followed the Inner Circle.

Further up, the path ended at a river fed by a great frothing waterfall. There, they encountered some more Red Templar Commanders and archers. These were a bit more challenging, and Ria found she had to be extra vicious with them.

Other soldiers flooded in from behind but took hits from some of the arrows. Some of her own men were killed.

Blood diffused through the water, seeping into her trousers. A Templar knight splashed toward her, glaring through the narrow slit of his helm. Ria dodged the first blast of electricity but he managed to rake her arms with his claws.

She hissed in pain and doubled over, clutching at the deep wounds. The Templar charged his hands up for another shot but he froze under Dorian's spell.

Ria took the chance to stab him.

"You alright down there?" called Iron Bull from on top of the walkway.

"I'm fine," said Ria through gritted teeth.

"Do you want me to heal-" started Vivienne.

"No. Save that for later," said the knight, tearing off some bandage material with her teeth. She wrapped it around the arm and tied it. It would have to do.

She slung her shield on her back and looked around at her soldiers, counting them. Seven had died.

The Herald started moving again, and Ria led her soldiers through the water.

 _Oh, bloody hell_ , she thought as the armour made it difficult to wade through it. Her men had less of an issue since their armour was lighter. She jerked her head to the bank and they nodded, powering on ahead.

About a yard away, there were more Marksmen waiting on the walkways. An arrow shot by, grazing her neck. They loosed another volley of them, narrowly missing her as she waded through a small archway.

"Varric, Sera. Take them out!" the Herald yelled.

There were startled yelps and thuds as the bolts met their marks.

When she _finally_ reached the slippery slope, her men helped her up with a slight smirk.

"Don't laugh," she growled.

"Understood, Ser," said Liam.

They sprinted again to catch up with the rest.

"Those were Grey Wardens, they must be the last of those enslaved at Adamant," said Trevelyan as he jumped down from a boulder.

"That, or you've got another set of Wardens, pissed at you somehow," suggested Iron Bull.

The trees cast an emerald glow on the forest floor, lighting up the undergrowth, all the lichen, mushrooms and weird animals scuttling around.

After taking winding, twisting turns deeper into the forest, they came across Shadows, more Horrors and even two Behemoths.

The Horrors she killed easily, but the Shadows were so fast that she gained some more gashes on her arms and shoulders. She turned and rolled away just in time as the Shadow lashed out. Ria cut down on its long arms but it banged her blade away. Another swipe, and the Shadow dropped to the ground as blood gushed out from its chest. She stabbed it and her blade burned it internally.

The area was clear now, and everyone straightened up.

Ria counted her men. She sighed- there were thirty.

The temple was right before them, its ancient stones covered in twisting vines and moss. A single opening stood lofty and ominous, daring them to enter.

"Well, this must be it," said Varric, shouldering his crossbow.

"It doesn't look any different than I expected," said the Herald.

The witch turned her cat like eyes on him. "Appearances can be deceiving. Do not underestimate what is beyond that door… there is an ancient power that resides in this forest."

"The elves, you mean," said Ria, testing out her aching shoulder.

Morrigan nodded. "And you would do well to be cautious."

"Magic," grumbled Iron Bull. "I don't like fighting against something I can't get my fingers around."

"Oh, I am sure you will get your chance," said Vivienne, dusting her robes.

"Yes, now let us press on," said Cassandra, impatient to be off.

"And what of us, Ser Ria?" asked Giles.

The knight paused, regarding them a moment.

 _So young…_

She saw those faces and knew she couldn't ask any more of them.

"Return to the camp and aid the Commander in whatever he does."

"But Ser, you don't know what you will face in there," said Alec, surprised.

"We are many, we are capable. Now do as I command. You've proven yourselves worthy soldiers today- all of you. But your help will be needed elsewhere."

Her soldiers exchanged glances but brought their hands up in salute.

"Then Maker guide you, Ser Ria," Rhys said.

"Maker guide you," echoed the rest of them before running to the path back to camp.

"You did the right thing, kid," Varric said when they were gone.

"Thanks," said Ria with a nod. "I just hope they survive the rest of the battle."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"It appears that the temple's magicks are still strong," said Morrigan with a voice full of pleasant curiosity.

She and the Herald approached stone columns in the centre of a raised platform. Strange, intricate patterns were carved into the stone floor. When they stepped on them, Ria noticed they lit up with a blue glow. Trevelyan squinted at the unfamiliar strokes and letters etched into the columns.

"Ancient elven. I can't make out much," he said.

"Atish'all Vir Abelasan- it means-" started Solas.

"Enter the path of the Well of Sorrows."

All of them stared at Ria.

"My dear, are you quite sure you don't remember anything about this place?" asked Vivienne.

The knight shook her head. "I was taught the language by an elder back in the Alienage."

"Ohhh, right," said Varric, slapping his forehead. "You used to be Kallian Tabris."

Sera looked her up and down. "You don't _look_ like an elf. You sure you weren't joking?"

"That's not really something I would joke about."

Solas studied her with an inscrutable expression. "You must have been well learned to read this."

"Somehow I am not surprised," said Dorian.

"But don't expect me to read all of that," said Ria with a cough.

Morrigan laughed. "Do not worry. I suspect most of it will be related to their rituals and gods. The question is, however: what is this Well of Sorrows?"

"Does it matter?" asked Sera. "I mean, I thought we were here for the creepy mirror."

"We are," said the Inquisitor, crossing his arms and frowning at the witch. "At least, that's what we were told."

The witch's eyes narrowed. "We cannot know for certain… but I confess that this name has stirred my interest."

She peered closer at the words. "There is something about knowledge. Respectful or pure. Shiven… shivennen…" She shook her head. "'Tis all I can translate."

The Herald sighed in frustration. "We're out of luck unless one of those temple elves drops a lexicon."

"Supplicants to Mythal would have first paid obeisance here. Following their path may aid entry," replied the witch, crossing her arms.

Blackwall grumbled at this. "So we do this ritual? Must we offer a prayer to elven gods?"

"If need be," said Morrigan. "Unless you wish to turn back?"

The warden didn't reply.

Trevelyan sighed and lit up one tile, then another. After a couple of trials, he completed the ritual.

"You did it. Well done," said Morrigan.

They ran up the stone steps to a set of doors glowing electric blue. As soon as they walked through the next one, there was an explosion from above. Ria saw Calpernia up ahead. Her eyes narrowed at them and she scowled.

"Don't let them pass!" the woman commanded and disappeared into a hole in the ground.

From both sides of the Hall of Shrines, the Venatori emerged.

Cassandra and Maxwell drew the archers in with chains before they could let the arrows loose. Iron Bull smashed the zealots and the mages used their freezing spells.

Ria swung her sword at the zealots, cutting them down one by one. But she didn't see the spellbinder behind an enormous root at the water's edge. He loosed a ball of fire at her and Ria panicked. But then it angled past her, hitting the rocks.

"Careful there," said Dorian, maintaining the ward.

 _I've got be more wary._

The warriors killed the last of the men and they all caught their breaths. Vivienne tutted and examined Ria's wounds.

"I think it's time to tend to these, my dear," she said, and a glow lit up Ria's burns and gashes.

The knight sighed in relief.

Then they hurried forward, not wanting to miss Calpernia. At the top, they neared a gaping hole with flaming debris everywhere. The Herald tried to run, but Morrigan stopped him.

"Hold! A moment."

Maxwell made a noise of frustration. "What is it?"

"While they rush ahead, _this_ leads to our true destination. We should walk the petitioner's path, as before." She pointed at the elvish door behind them.

Solas nodded. "In this, I have to agree with the witch. We stand on ancient ground, deserving of our respect."

The Herald shook his head. "We don't know what's behind those doors. They may have a reason for going another way."

"Had they the option, they would have proceeded. That must lead to their goal."

Maxwell crossed his arms. "Their goal? Or _yours_?"

Morrigan regarded him seriously. "There is… a danger to the natural order. Legends walked Thedas once, things of might and wonder. Corypheus… if he pursues it, would squander the ancient power of the well. I would have it restored."

"Alright, then," sighed the Herald. "Lead the way."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"We're being watched," warned Maxwell.

Ria resisted the urge to check that he was right. They all stepped closer to the figure standing on the level above. His light eyes were eerily mysterious in the shadow of his hood, and the elaborate tattoos etched on his face added to that image.

"Venavis," he said, voice ringing out in the silence. "You… are unlike the other invaders." He gestured at the Herald's left hand. "You bear the mark of magic, which is…familiar. How has this come to pass? What is your connection to those who first disturbed our slumber?"

"They are my enemies, as well as yours," answered Trevelyan.

The elf regarded him for a moment. "I am called Abelas: we are called Sentinels, tasked with standing against those who trespass on sacred ground."

Ria turned her head slightly and glimpsed a row of elves training arrows on them in the periphery of her vision.

"We wake only to fight," continued Abelas. "To preserve this place. Our numbers diminish with each invasion." He paced before speaking again. "I know what you seek. Like all before you, you wish to drink from the Vir'abelasan."

"The Place of the Way of Sorrows," explained Morrigan in a whisper. "He speaks of the well!"

"It is not _for_ you. For _any_ of you," the elf said firmly.

"Do you know if Corypheus has come for this well?" asked Cassandra.

Abelas' eyes narrowed. "I strongly suspect that he has."

"So what exactly _is_ this Vir'abelasan?" said the Herald.

"It is a path, one walked only by those who toiled in Mythal's favour."

"He speaks of priests, perhaps," said Morrigan in a low voice.

"More than that you need not know," said the elf, putting a clamp on any further discussion.

Maxwell shook his head. "If the Well of Sorrows is a source of power, now is when it's needed."

"It is not _power_ ," replied Abelas contemptuously. "Not such as you could use, even if I permitted it."

"But Corypheus' minions may be here to claim it, unless you've defeated them already."

"We have not," said the elf grimly. He sighed. "Trespassers you are, but you have followed rites of petition. You have shown respect to Mythal. If these others are enemies of yours, we will aid you in destroying them. When this is done, you shall be permitted to depart… and never return."

The Inner Circle exchanged glances. Sera let out a noise of disgust.

"So they can stab us in the back afterwards? Stuff that."

Morrigan turned serious eyes to the Herald. "Consider carefully. We must stop Corypheus, yes, but you may need the well for your own."

Trevelyan looked at the others. Varric, Iron Bull, Dorian and Ria shrugged. Sera shook her head.

"I hate to say this, but we may need that well," said Cassandra.

"It is up to you, my dear," added Vivienne.

Maxwell nodded and turned to Abelas. "Then I refuse."

"As you wish," said the elf with a mock bow. "Our duty is clear. The Vir'abelasan must not be usurped. Even if I must destroy it… Masal din'an." He whirled around to race up the steps.

"No!" cried out Morrigan, instantly morphing into a raven to chase after him.

"Morrigan!" shouted Maxwell, but it was no use.

Ria exchanged glances with Varric, who grimaced.

"Well, here we go again," he said, hefting his crossbow.

"Time to dance," said Ria, taking up her sword.


	29. Chapter 27: A Twist of Fate

**CHAPTER 27: A TWIST OF FATE**

"This place is like a maze," said Trevelyan in frustration.

"Elfy-elves didn't want normal people near their precious well," said Sera in amusement.

"Makes sense," said Ria, dusting the wall with her hands. She uncovered a small lever hidden in the patterns. "Aha! Found it."

The knight pulled it down and it opened to reveal a stairway leading up.

"Let's move," said the Herald, already running towards it.

They went through another set of stairs, doors… and more doors. Eventually they came to a room with some sort of pond in the middle- why this would be here, Ria would never understand.

Her attention drifted to the dark armoured men in the corner. They sensed movement and whipped around, brandishing their swords.

"Venatori!" warned Dorian.

They didn't need to be told twice. Everyone rushed in to engage the enemies, hacking and swinging their weapons. Ria crushed two of their helms and buried her axe in their necks. The mages finished off the rest with fire mines.

The heroes continued on through the doors and sprinted up countless steps and winding passages.

It seemed they would never get anywhere… until they reached another room full of Venatori.

The last of the Sentinels gurgled as the Venatori stabbed their guts. On the far side stood Calpernia, glaring at them.

"So close…" she said. "The well knows its vessel… and those who would despoil it." She sighed, turning to face them. "Stand aside, Inquisitor. Leave, this is not your time."

"I might be listening to you if you hadn't blown a path through the temple," said Trevelyan, frowning.

"Any force that might have cared is dust and ashes. You serve your people- you have one last chance to save them. The well overflows with knowledge, power abandoned by those the elves worshipped as gods. To walk the Fade without the anchor- _that_ is what the well will give Corypheus."

"So he _is_ after the well!" said the Herald, shaking his head.

"Andraste's ass," said Varric. "That's even worse than the eluvian."

"So if I take that power before him, Corypheus will be left empty handed."

"Simple fool," said Calpernia, shaking her head. "Come then, one last sacrifice!"

And the fight began.

The Venatori lunged for the Herald, and the warriors all charged at the zealots. Meanwhile, Dorian, Solas and Vivienne hailed ice crystals and firebolts on Calpernia, who retaliated with explosive blasts and ice zones.

Ria swung her sword at the enemies, slashing and parrying each blow habitually. The man put up a good fight, anticipating her feints and blocking her uppercuts but he failed to dodge her stab to the throat. Blood spilled from his mouth as he collapsed.

Around her, Cassandra cut down at a spellbinder, who kept casting a ward on himself and striking her with electricity.

"Urgh! I hate magic!" said Sera, watching her arrow bounce off the force field.

The Seeker cried out as he shocked her, and Ria ran to her side. She growled in frustration as her own sword slid past the ward. But the last blow must have drained his strength- the ward disappeared. Ria took the opportunity to behead him. Unfortunately, there was another spellbinder on the other side, who the Herald was engaging. He wasn't having much luck either, and Varric's bolts, Sera's arrows couldn't penetrate it.

As for Calpernia, massive blasts of energy shot out from her hands as she fought Dorian and Vivienne. Dorian looked as though he was about to faint. Ria sprinted in a wide circle around Calpernia, trying to get behind her.

She motioned for Cassandra to join her, and together they tried to get an opening. The problem was that the Tevinter mage seemed to have multiple eyes. While maintaining her spells on Dorian and Vivienne, she kept activating fire mines around Ria and the Seeker. And in the cramped space of the room, they had to be extra careful not to step in them.

As if that wasn't enough, they all groaned when several Rage Demons appeared out of nowhere.

"Damn it," growled Ria.

She dodged as one Demon smashed its flaming fists on the ground. The floor was blackened where it struck. Ria brought her blade down ferociously but the Rage Demon jumped sideways. The sword hit the floor and stuck. With a snarl she wrenched it free and slashed at its torso. It didn't do the damage she was expecting, and realized that she was meeting fire with fire.

 _Oh, right_.

Ria switched to her axe quickly and swung at it. In two swings it was on the floor, dead. She whirled around and helped Iron Bull crush the other Rage Demon. Then the last one lunged at the Herald.

Everyone else was in a fight. Ice immobilized the Demon and it was frozen in mid strike. Then Ria heard a thud as Vivienne crumpled to the ground.

"Vivienne!" she shouted.

Ria looked over to see Dorian and Solas struggling to overcome Calpernia. The woman laughed and doubled the force of her attacks- then Dprian dropped unconscious as well.

"Shit!" said Iron Bull.

"Two down!" said Ria, coming to the Herald's aid.

The spellbinder still had his ward up, but it was weakening. Both of them hacked at the ward, trying to deactivate it. Ria grunted as multiple ice crystals tore her clothes under the plate. She jumped back again as the mage tried to stun them with electricity.

With several more slashes, it was down. Trevelyan ran him through with his sword.

Wiping the dripping sweat off her face, Ria turned to see Iron Bull and Cassandra trying to stab Calpernia. Fortunately, the mage was doing worse with close combat. She blocked their blows with her staff and shot fire or ice bolts at them- but she needed to do these in quick succession.

Ria and Trevelyan joined them and surrounded her. Calpernia charged up a spell and the Seeker jumped back.

"Out of her way!" she shouted and they all followed her, just before a fire mine erupted.

The ground was burning now, separating them from Calpernia. She laughed again and hurled multiple spells at each one of them. A ball of fire knocked Ria in the head, but thankfully her helmet took the damage. She then dove to the side to avoid a blizzard.

Sera and Varric shot at the Tevinter mage but she put up a ward. Solas slammed it with a fist of fire.

Ria sighed and saw that the others were landing blows on it too. She ran to Vivienne and Dorian's side to revive them. After the routine ABCs, fluids and lyrium injections, they stirred.

Both of them got up shakily but helped the warriors in getting the ward down. Ria also ran to attack her, and within no time they had her completely immobilized.

The knight grimaced as the Herald plunged his sword into her heart, hearing the crack of the sternum and squelch of tearing tissue.

It was over.

There was silence in the room, and Ria let out the breath she'd been holding. She looked around her- it was a mess, with fire and ash and blood splattered on the ground. Vivienne and Dorian drained some potions and healed their own wounds- they didn't have the strength to do any more. The others also glugged down painkillers, grimacing at the taste.

And without further delay, they reached the final exit.

"Here we go," said the Herald, as he pushed open the door.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"The Well of Sorrows!" said the Herald, breathing out a sigh of relief.

"Finally!" exclaimed Cassandra.

"That's… something," said Iron Bull, snorting.

The air was fresh outside, as opposed to the stifling atmosphere indoors. Ria took the opportunity to get some oxygen into her system. Then she heard the distant sound of destructive spells.

Ria frowned. "I can hear fighting."

As if on cue, there was an explosive blast that rocked the ground and shook the structures. The heroes stumbled and steadied themselves with their weapons.

"What was that?"

Iron Bull was the first to stand up.

"Who's that at the well?"

"Has Abelas already reached it?" asked the Herald in alarm.

"Or Morrigan?" Ria suggested.

"There are three people over there," said the Qunari. "Too far away for me to see."

Together, they all ran down the stairs to a narrow pool in the centre of a clearing below. Leading up to the well was a long stone staircase. There was another explosion and Ria used her sword, stabbing it in the dirt to help steady herself.

"What's going on up there?" said Varric, staggering up again.

The Herald shook his head. Without further ado, they all sprinted up the steps, and with her near sighted vision, the knight could make out someone standing and a body on the ground…

"Abelas!" shouted Trevelyan when they reached the well.

Morrigan was there, singed and trembling, but standing. She shook her head weakly.

"'Tis too late."

 _No…_

It felt like her gut was being plunged in a bucket of ice cold water.

The Inner Circle gathered around the broken body at the edge of the empty depression in the earth. Trevelyan walked slowly to the well, face frozen with incredulity.

"No… it can't be," he said.

Ria joined him, staring down and shaking her head. "It's empty," she breathed.

Her gaze lifted to the eluvian and saw that its usual sheen, the mystical swirls of magic in its depths… were gone.

Even Varric, Vivienne and Dorian had nothing to say.

A raspy cough sounded from the ground. They turned to see the sentinel elf struggling to lift his head. "The Elder One…"

Ria rushed to his side, supporting his head. His form was bloodied, torn and burned without an inch of relief.

"Tell us what happened."

The elf's eyelids peeled open, the flesh of them necrotic. His mouth barely moved as he spoke.

"He has entered… the Eluvian."

" _Damn_ it!" snarled the Herald, putting his hands on his head as if to tear his hair out.

"After _all_ we've been through! _All_ of our efforts… wasted!" shouted Cassandra, banging a fist on the mirror.

Everyone else stared as their worst fears were confirmed. Ria exchanged glances with the Herald. She saw despair in his face, clear as day. The surgeon shook her head. This couldn't be the end… it couldn't be.

"What can we do?" she asked to all of them. "Anyone, _please_!"

Solas shook his head. They all hung their heads, limbs slack and defeated.

"'Tis lost forever. This world will end at the hands of that madman," said Morrigan.

Ria looked down at the Sentinel elf and his blackened body. It was beyond repair.

Beyond the well, the Eluvian glinted in the sunlight. But it was locked, locked unless Corypheus himself left the Fade. And even with the sun beating down on her, the world felt as cold as the Frostback Mountains.


	30. Chapter 28: To Tame a Dragon

_**Here's the next chapter, I've been dying to share it for weeks now... still editing the others, which will come soon. Let me know what you think! Hope you enjoy it**_

 **CHAPTER 28: To Tame A Dragon**

"We must get to the Eluvian at Skyhold. It is the only way," said Cassandra.

"But _how_?" asked Ria. "It's leagues away from here. By then, Corypheus will have destroyed everything!"

"I don't know!" cried the Seeker, turning away in anger. She sighed and glared at the sky.

The surgeon turned to Morrigan, who shrugged and held her palms face up.

"I have as little idea as you do."

"Now calm down everyone," said Dorian, shaking his head. "I know how you feel, but panicking has never been the answer to our problems."

Ria felt a sharp pang at that. "My father…" she started.

At the mention of her parent, everyone looked at her.

"Dorian's right. You get half of the job done if you don't panic... it's what my father always said."

"Then what do you propose?" said the Herald impatiently.

Ria thought. "I don't suppose we have any flying native animals around here?"

"What you are looking for is a dragon," said the witch, sighing. "Which we will never find unless we summon Corypheus' dragon itself. And even if we assume control of it, we may not reach Corypheus in time."

"I'm... guessing we don't want to do that then," said Varric.

"Back in Adamant, Erimond summoned it," said Ria stubbornly. "We can bring him here, force him to do it again."

Morrigan's eyes widened slightly. "You are... considering this option," she said.

"Where is he?"

"We dragged him here to locate the last of the corrupted Grey Wardens," said Iron Bull.

"How did we manage that?" asked Ria doubtfully.

"We had our methods..." said Cassandra grimly, offering no explanation.

"He's at a Venatori Camp not too far from the temple," said the Herald, his face strangely hardened.

"This is madness!" said Blackwall. "Do we have any other ideas?"

A hissing gasp from the ground made them all jump. Ria looked down to see Abelas stretching out a blackened hand. She kneeled down to grab it, but he refused to be helped up.

His lips were barely moving. Ria frowned and leaned closer to hear his whisper.

"Summon it…"

The knight stared at him. "What?"

"You can be more… cousin…"

"Ria, what is he saying?" asked Vivienne from behind.

The knight gaped at him a moment before replying. "He wants us to summon it."

"What _?_ " said Cassandra.

"It'll rip us to shreds!" said Varric. "We can't fly that."

"Agreed," said Dorian. "But either way, we face imminent death."

"What else did he say?" said the Herald, noticing the look on her face.

Ria nodded. "He called me cousin…"

"He knows you were an elf?" asked Sera.

Abelas beckoned her forward. "I drank…"

"He drank from the Well of Sorrows," answered Morrigan for him.

Everyone stared at her.

"The Elder One came too soon- there was no time to destroy it… but it seems that its secrets will be lost forever regardless," said the witch mournfully.

"Well, at least Corypheus didn't get a hold of that," said Maxwell.

Then Varric cast his eyes about. "Hey, where's Solas?"

Only a few people responded. Iron Bull shrugged. "Beats me… probably fed up with all this. Given up and gone home."

The surgeon listened absent mindedly.

 _You can be more…_

This sounded very familiar, but what it was, she couldn't remember…

And then it clicked- the words of Chancellor Roderick came flooding back to her: _I don't know, if this simple memory can save us. This could be more than mere accident._ You _could be more_

But the man had said this to Trevelyan, not her. And she still didn't understand what it meant.

"What did you mean?" she asked the elf.

Abelas seemed to be using up his last reserve of energy. "It is _in_ you," he rasped. Then she saw the life leave him as his pupils fixed on the sky, unmoving.

She stood up. "He's dead."

"His wounds were too great," said Vivienne, coming up to put a hand on her shoulder.

"Yes," said Ria, straightening. Then her eyes hardened, and she whirled around. "We need to summon it."

"I'll get Erimond!" offered Sera, and she bounded away in the direction of the temple, long legs running swiftly.

"Wait, so we've decided?" said Varric.

"We don't have time," said Ria. "As Dorian said: either way, we will die. I say this is our last chance."

Everyone exchanged worried glances but nodded reluctantly.

All of them waited with bated breaths for Sera to return. Ria tapped her fingers on her sword impatiently. The elf would have to find Erimond, and quickly. But if there was anyone she could trust to win a race, it was Sera. Besides, they had no other choice- admitting this was painful, but it was better than standing around accepting their fate. She saw her own impatience mirrored in the others and sighed.

The Herald and Cassandra were sitting side by side at the edge of the well, talking in a low voice. Vivienne was leaning on her staff, staring at the sky. Dorian was shaking his head and pacing around, his moustache twitching. Varric and Iron Bull looked utterly dejected.

And finally, after what seemed like eons, there was a familiar enthusiastic shout from below. Everyone jumped, hearing Sera's voice. The elf was dragging the mage along, who looked rather floppy in her grasp.

He looked incredibly skeletal and haggard, his beard long and his skin sallow. Ria noticed his expression was defeated, weary. She did a double take when she saw his left arm- it ended at a blackened stump. It was crude, as if hacked at multiple times. There were missing fingers in his right hand. Not long after, more mages joined her, panting. Ria guessed they were here to keep an eye on him.

Erimond staggered, but had the strength to glare at the Herald. "So... you want to summon the dragon, do you?"

Cassandra stepped forward and held her blade to his neck. The muscles of his jaw twitched.

Trevelyn eyed him, the look of disgust clear on his face. "Summon Corypheus' dragon. Now."

"As you _wish_ ," said Erimond. "I shall enjoy watching your deaths."

The group of mages had him immobilized to the spot.

"One unexpected spell," said the Seeker, still holding the blade to his neck. "And you _will_ die."

He glared at her. "I am well aware of that. Not that I care."

"Then perhaps we should reconsider the decision to offer you the Rite of Tranquility."

At that, he paled even further. He didn't speak any more after that.

The mages brought his staff to him and he took it.

Erimond raised his staff in the air and brought it down with a bang on the stones. He continued doing this till he cracked the ground. There was no light, no glow from the orb on his staff. But Ria felt the hairs on her neck stand on end. An eerie atmosphere, a _presence_ floated around them. She looked around and saw the others likewise affected. The winds seemed to shift and she thought she heard whispers in the air.

And then…

There was a rhythmic beating of wings, a force stronger than gale making them stagger. They shielded themselves with their arms as the beast descended.

Eyes… ruby red eyes. Scales as strong as granite, and teeth that could snap a man's bone with ease.

When it roared, it was a terrible roar- like the sound of a thousand screams clashing with the deep, reverberant rumble from its larynx. Ria could smell the stench of rotten flesh, and even felt the blood coated spittle from its jaws.

"Attack!" bellowed the Herald, running forwards.

Vivienne, Dorian, Morrigan and the other mages channelled all of their mana into one blast of ice that would have shred a human to pieces. As it was, the spell barely nicked its thick layer of scale armour. But it did send it off balance, giving the warriors the chance to charge. Varric and Sera launched their bolts and arrows at it.

Ria ran to join the others as they hacked at its legs. Unfortunately, the blows glanced off its steel-like scales.

 _How do you penetrate this thing?_

The dragon threw its head back and roared. It snapped at her, the gnashing teeth just inches from her face. Ria jumped back, swinging her sword. A shudder ran down its length as it started forward. It roared again.

"It's belly! Cut the parts uncovered by scales!" hollered Blackwall.

Everyone obeyed and fought to get under it. The big beast stomped about, trying to crush them with its claws.

"Do not disable it!" shouted Morrigan . "It must be able to fly!"

Ria rolled out of the way of the swiping claws and under the belly. She made shallow cuts along its length. The others also made similar marks. Blood painted the ground and their armour. It continuously roared and breathed fire, trying to avoid the blades but failing. There were just too many people for it to fight. The dragon kept turning around in confusion. But the damage it took was still nowhere near enough to overcome it. And then…

At last, its serrated nails found its mark: a dark figure flew through the air to land with a sickening crunch. Ria whipped around to see the disturbingly still body of the Warden.

"Blackwall!" she yelled.

Everyone was similarly shocked.

The knight turned back to the dragon, breathing heavily. She felt rage. _Unrestrained_ rage.

She thought about every quest, every complication they had waded through. Every comrade that bled and sacrificed, the painstaking efforts of Josephine, Cullen and Leliana. The fragile hope the Inquisition had garnered from each success. The bones that were crushed, the blood that was spilt, the final screams of the dying...

It couldn't end like this. She couldn't let it end like this.

 _I can't!_

The words echoed in her mind like a voice in the Fade, reverberating off the walls of her mind. Ria stiffened as she felt a ghostly change settle in her body.

Something wasn't right.

Her arms went coldly numb and she could hear her heartbeat so loudly- like it was ramped up to full volume. Ria panicked, unable to control the intense sensations spreading through her body. Hell, it was like she couldn't control it.

 _No..._

Suddenly, her vision blurred and a shattering headache made her groan and double over. The others were too busy fighting to notice. And then… every muscle tensed, every thought shadowed by a strange pressure bearing down. And slowly… the headache subsided. But there remained a throbbing in her whole body, as if to the rhythm of each drumming pulse. When she straightened, Ria found her vision red and hazy- as if blood was everywhere. Her body told her to move. It _hungered_ for movement.

"Ria?" asked Varric uncertainly.

She ignored him and kept advancing. Everyone stopped what they were doing to stare at her.

"What's happening to her?" asked Cassandra, staggering at the tremor in the ground.

"I don't know!" said Maxwell. "Morrigan?"

"'Tis beyond my knowledge!"

Ria took one step at a time... leisurely, wonderingly.

Each torsional contraction of her heart sent vibrations that rippled through her body, down to the smallest nest of receptors, the finest of capillaries in her extremities. She could feel the cool air rushing past the very cilia in her trachea, down the bifurcation into the maze-like network of pipes. The sense of unbridled power with each flexion and extension, the culmination of metabolites and then their degradation. The intricacies of a living body.

Ah, but the energy... _glorious_ energy.

 _Come, my pet…_

The voice inside was hers... but also that of another.

Suddenly, the beast ceased its attacks and turned its tapered head to her. The red glow in its gaze seemed to diminish in intensity.

 _Put aside your petty tantrums and bow… bow before me._

With a low rumble, the dragon lowered its head to the ground. Its back was arched as it bent down, tail curled into a passive position.

There were gasps of surprise all around, but the knight paid no heed.

 _Good... good,_ the voice purred. _Now take_ _me to the Pretender._

A hiss escaped from its maws, and there was a _snick_ as it blinked.

"Ria…" said a distant voice… familiar, but insignificant.

"Ria!" It tried again, and the woman snarled in irritation. She fixed her eyes on the small man, who dropped his weapon and stepped back.

The knight turned away to walk slowly to the dragon. She ran her hand along its side, feeling the scales pierce her skin. It bled, but she felt no pain. Then, with one move, she hoisted herself up onto its back and gripped its spikes.

"Wait!" said another mortal.

She and the dragon hissed at the same time as a brown haired human came close.

"We need to defeat him together! You can't go alone!"

"Listen to him, Ria!" said the dwarf. "At least take two people!"

"I'll go with them," said a dark skinned mage.

"No! Let _me_ ," said the brash female.

"They need at least one mage, Cassandra. There's no time!"

The dragon let out a threatening growl, slamming the earth with its claws. Dirt and stone flew everywhere, showering the group with sharp debris. They all cried out in alarm, shielding or warding themselves.

Ria watched them in amusement. _Patience_ … _let them come. We can have an audience witness our victory. After that... do as you wish._

Reluctantly, the beast relaxed and lowered to the ground. The man and woman hesitated before climbing on board.

Without further delay, the dragon stood on powerfully muscled hindlegs. And with a mighty flap of its wings, her mount launched into the air, the fast wind blasting the knight's hair back. She laughed, relishing the freedom of her power at last. After a while, the blue of the sky fell away and they found themselves hurtling into the darkness of a swirling vortex as the dragon responded to the call of its previous master...

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Leliana dropped the pack she was holding.

The dust covered heroes looked at the ground. Varric gave her a pained, apologetic look.

"I'm sorry, Leliana… if I knew this would happen, I would never have let her come with us."

The spymaster didn't reply, but collapsed on a nearby stump. She stared at the ground like the rest of them, feeling nothing but cold dread. They had won the battle against the Elder One's army, but there was no true victory today.

"So she has left to enter the Fade."

"Maxwell and Vivienne have gone with her," said the Seeker, her own voice strained.

Leliana nodded slowly, unable to wrap her head around what had occurred.

"We knew it was a race we couldn't win," said Dorian, shaking his head. "Corypheus had the upper hand."

The dwarf came closer. "Leliana… there's something I should tell you."

 _More news?_ She thought numbly.

"Before she left, she… something happened to Ria. I can't explain it, but the kid had the most dangerous look in her eyes. Andraste's ass, it looked like the fire of hell in them. She didn't even _recognize_ us. We were fighting the dragon, but she just walked up to it like it was nothing."

Iron Bull nodded grimly. "I've never seen anything like it- the beast just… _bowed_ to her."

"And the elf," said the Seeker suddenly. "He said a few words to Ria, but none of us were close enough to hear."

"I did catch the last sentence before he died," said Morrigan.

Everyone looked at her, including the spymaster.

"He said: _It is in you_." She shook her head. "I cannot imagine what it could mean."

Leliana sat there in silence, her chest aching so much she wanted to tear it out. To have her love back for so short a time, and then to face the prospect of a second death…

 _It's too much_ … _Maker, it's too much. I can't bear it,_ she thought, shaking her head. She buried her face in her shaking hands.

The dwarf patted her awkwardly on the arm. "We're so sorry."

The tears were coming now, burning the rim of her eyes. Leliana thought back to the night Kallian died. Her still body... how the pain of it had driven Leliana to the Deep Roads, fighting to end her own life. She thought back to their first meeting in Haven, Ria's words of comfort, their walks in the night, after the Breach, their dance at the Winter Palace, their first kiss…

Her mind was sinking with those memories: Ria returning from Adamant, her proposal, their marriage, their time in Orlais… Maker, even every _argument_.

The Orlesian half laughed and half sobbed into her hand while her friends looked on sadly. She didn't need anyone to tell her that it was hopeless. She didn't want anyone to try and give her false hope. It was like the Blight all over again.

"Leliana?"

It was Josie.

"Maker, what is happening here?" she heard her friend say.

"Leliana, are you alright?" Alistair asked her.

A warm hand was laid on her shoulder.

"Er… things are very bad at the moment," explained the dwarf. "Corypheus has entered the Fade ahead of us, and Ria has left on a dragon's back with the Herald and Vivienne."

" _What?_ "

"Did I hear this right?" came the Commander's incredulous voice.

At this, Leliana lifted her head, holding her hands to her temple.

"Yes, you heard correctly," said the Seeker stiffly, her own face stained with tears. "Corypheus used the Eluvian before us. Ria, Trevelyan and Vivienne have sped to Skyhold on dragonback."

Cullen's arm went slack and he held his other hand to his forehead.

"No… no, no. After _everything_ we went through…"

"But why _Ria_?" demanded Josie. "I don't understand what has happened here. And what about that dragon?"

"After we found Abelas dead and the Eluvian locked, Ria suggested we summon a dragon. Erimond summoned Corypheus' Archdemon to transport us," explained Cassandra.

 _Archdemon…_

"That's suicide!" said Alistair. "You could have failed at controlling it."

Varric nodded. "We could have, but something happened that none of us understand."

Cullen made a noise of frustration. "Just _what_ happened?"

"The surgeon-knight turned all evil eyes and talked to it. Then it just sort of bowed its head and let her ride it," said Sera helpfully.

Cullen and Josie stood staring.

"So she _tamed_ the dragon?" asked the Commander.

"Pretty much," said Iron Bull.

The spymaster sat there without really hearing the conversation. She felt another wave of ice cold water douse her. It couldn't be… not again…

It _was_ the Blight all over again.

"The dragon…" she murmured.

Everyone glanced at her in concern.

"You said it was an Archdemon?" she asked Morrigan sharply.

"It is not truly an Archdemon, but a high dragon corrupted by red lyrium."

The Inner Circle whirled around to see Solas standing there.

"Andraste's ass!" said Varric. "When did _you_ get here?"

"Just now," said the elf mysteriously.

"And it obeyed her?" asked Leliana.

Everyone looked like they wanted to ask him where he had been, but they returned their gazes to the spymaster.

Leliana looked away to the army, not really seeing them.

"Yeah…" said Varric.

"None of us could come near it," said Cassandra. "Ria was the one who controlled it."

"Leliana… what are you thinking?" said her friend. Josie knew her well enough to notice the change.

 _It is in you._

"By the Maker," she breathed. "It can't be…"

"But so it is," said a new voice, full of age and mystery behind every syllable.

The whole Inner Circle cried out in surprise, drawing their weapons.

" _Mother_!" said Morrigan, loathing in her voice.

Everyone stared at the visitor in shock- the elderly woman approached in a gust of wind, pace brisk. Her white hair reached her shoulders, swishing like the fine tail of a horse. The golden eyes of an eagle were alone a confirmation of her relationship with Morrigan.

"Do not trust her! She is a deceiving witch!" spat Morrigan, glaring at the woman.

 _Flemeth?_ Thought Leliana in surprise. _But… Kallian killed her._

Her friends backed away from the newcomer warily, surrounding her and closing off escape.

Flemeth sighed. "Oh... how you haven't changed, my daughter. But really, is this how you treat the great Mythal?"

At this, there was a chorus of confused replies.

" _Mythal_?" said Varric, doing a double take.

"What is going on here?" said Iron Bull.

"You lie!" said her daughter, hurling a blast of magic.

The old woman held up a hand, and the attack dissipated. Morrigan stopped, confused.

"I don't understand… how can _you_ be Mythal?"

A profound gravity settled on Flemeth's face. "There is no time for that, my daughter. You must move quickly if you are to prevent the destruction of this world. I have come to give you my aid."

The Commander looked at her suspiciously. "And why should we believe you?"

Cassandra watched her cautiously. "There are tales of this Flemeth- some say you help heroes for reasons of your own."

A small smile stretched on Mythal's face. "I _nudge_ history, when it is required. Other times… a shove is needed."

"And why have you chosen to appear to us now?" asked Josephine. "Surely you would not want to reveal yourself to the whole army."

"You needn't worry about that. They," she said, gesturing at all the soldiers. "Cannot see me. They cannot hear me."

"Then what is it you want?" asked Cassandra impatiently.

The old woman raised her arm, and they all looked up as the sun was covered by membranous wings that seemed to span the length of the sky. Everyone let out exclamations of surprise as the dragon descended, buffeting them with its wings. On its back were multiple saddles.

"What I want," said Flemeth slowly. "Is for you to accept my help." Her eyes turned grave and ancient. "Though this Elder One has been a thorn in my side for long… be warned that he is not the last of your problems," she said, giving Leliana a piercing gaze.

 _She knows…_

"Leliana," said Josie, confused. "What is she talking about?"

"There is no time," said Mythal. "Make haste, and confront your enemies."

The spymaster, Cassandra, Varric, Morrigan, Alistair and Solas were already climbing. Unfortunately, the seats were all taken- Dorian, Iron Bull and Sera were left standing there. They sighed but saluted as the dragon prepared to jump.

"What? Leliana, no! It's too dangerous!" called Josie.

Leliana shook her head. "I have to, Josie. I can't let her die, I can't lose her again."

Her friend choked on her words and put a hand to her mouth. "Then be safe, my friends. Maker guide all of you."

The spymaster then turned to Flemeth. "What must I do?"

"The reincarnate? You will know when the time is right. Let fate play its hand."

And Leliana had no chance to ask any more questions- the dragon took to the sky, the wind whipping her hair and knocking the breath out of her.

 _Ria, my love. I am coming._


	31. Chapter 29: The Final Stand

**CHAPTER 29: The Final Stand**

Trevelyan stared helplessly at Ria. Whatever had happened to her, her very presence was making the Elder One cower in fear.

But what was most disturbing were the masses and masses of leering skeletal faces, the demons and gnashing teeth that surrounded them. The Darkspawn were everywhere, gathering from all corners of the Fade. And on top of that, the coal black dragon was watching them closely with ruby red eyes.

When they had first arrived, he and Vivienne had nearly jumped out of their skins at the sight. The Herald fully expected to fight this army… only to find that they neither attacked, nor threatened the group. All of them stood waiting on one of the narrow isthmuses connected to the precipice he was standing on. The only comforting sight was the swirling green rift at the mainland on the right.

He returned his gaze back to Ria. The knight was taking steps toward Corypheus, blood streaming from the gaps in her armour. But she didn't seem to feel the pain. Maxwell and Vivienne exchanged looks, breathing heavily from the combat. Lewis cocked her head, gazing down at the trembling former Darkspawn.

" _So… you are the one they call The Elder One_."

He shuddered unpleasantly at the sound- it was a grating, twisted mixture of screeching and rumbling. Alien. Inhuman.

Ria circled the fallen enemy, scraping her sword along the rocks horribly.

" _A pity_ ," she said, examining the orb in her hand. Then she looked down at him with those terrible black eyes. " _You are of no use to me_."

"Who are you?" rasped Corypheus.

Maxwell had to stare at the scene, unable to believe it. Only months ago, the Elder One had swooped down on them, creating rivers of blood and striking terror into the hearts of men. He remembered their meeting at Haven: how he had towered over Maxwell, petrified him with those manic eyes and nearly killed them all with such ease. This was the enemy that stirred all of Thedas.

And now… he was on the ground, his robes tattered and armour shattered to pieces. All his limbs were painfully angled, broken beyond any hope of normal alignment.

There was another tremor, and Trevelyan looked around him at the crumbling rocks. Even the monsters were rocked off their feet, sometimes falling into the deep crevices that opened. They were running out of time.

Maxwell shivered when he saw the cold depths of her eyes. Dark as the tunnels in the Deep Roads.

" _Have you lost the taint in your veins_?" hissed the woman. " _Bow before your master, and know the power that you craved to hold_."

Then she advanced, face contorting as she opened her mouth in a snarl. Trevelyan and Vivienne started, not expecting the rumbling, guttural roar that came from her. It was almost like a language- a cruel, harsh manipulation of sounds and accentuations.

"No! Ancient One, I beseech you!" cried the Elder One through his damaged throat. "Have mercy on me!"

Maxwell exchanged another bewildered look with Vivienne. The mage shook her head.

"This is most grave!" she yelled above the deafening roar and the earthquake.

"What does he mean?" the Herald yelled back.

A pained look crossed her face. "He addressed her as Ancient One! And that can only mean one thing… an Old God!"

" _What?_!"

Trevelyan felt his stomach drop two storeys down.

 _Ria… an Old God?_

" _You have already failed in your loyalty to me_ ," continued Ria… or rather, the Ancient One. She lifted the palm of her hand face up, wisps of… what, Trevelyan didn't know, but he felt a tremendous amount of energy radiating from her. The smoke like tendrils enveloped Corypheus' broken form slowly, then suddenly accelerated to _dive into_ his body. An earth shattering scream tore from his lips, and he flailed about horribly, his splintered bones piercing the flesh with each convulsion.

Maxwell turned his face away from the sight. Even though he was the enemy, he couldn't bring himself to look at this spectacle.

"What do we do?" he said to Vivienne in despair.

The mage looked at him, tears threatening to fall. "We have no choice. We _cannot_ allow her to lead another Blight!"

"You mean we have to…?"

Vivienne turned her gaze to the front resolutely, lifting her chin. "We must kill her."

 _No. This can't be the only way…_

And yet, he knew there were no other options.

"But how?" he said, shaking his head at the swarms of Darkspawn.

Vivienne's staff was already glowing with crackling energy. Maxwell swallowed down fear as he understood. He drew his sword, knowing that the sound would be well buried beneath the roars and the screams.

With adrenaline pumping through his limbs, the Herald charged at the Old God. The knight turned away from Corypheus' dead body. As he brought his sword down, Ria let out a vicious growl and ducked. In one fluid movement, she blocked his next strike with supernatural strength. The contact jarred his whole body and sent him flying backwards.

There was a splintering sound as Vivienne froze Ria's legs and the knight broke through it as if it were clay. Fresh blood flowed from the wounds made by the ice. Again, she was unfazed.

Trevelyan got up, a wave of icy fear cutting through him at her pit-less eyes.

The dragon started forward with a rumble but Ria held up a hand.

Low rumbles and hisses came from the army of Darkspawn, trying to come to their master's aid. Fortunately, there was a mighty crack, and a long fissure deterred most of them. As for the ones that did make it, Vivienne incinerated them on the spot.

"What's happening to the Fade?!"

The Ancient One straightened up, waving away the mage's spirit blade irritably.

" _What should have happened since the rise of Dumat_ ," she grated. " _Now my army shall storm the land without restraint."_

Ria opened her mouth, and this time… instead of a roar, there was an evil manifestation in the air.

"Come away from her!" shouted Vivienne in alarm.

The Herald didn't question her as he sprinted back and rolled to the mage's side. He was safe. But then there was another tremor in the ground, and the whole perimeter fell away into the abyss. Even Ria was caught off balance. She scowled.

" _Enough! Let us end this!"_

Trevelyan rushed forward again, Vivienne imprisoning Ria with electric bars.

" _Stop_!" cried a voice to the right.

The two faltered at the sound of hurried footsteps and beating wings.

" _Well, well_ ," said the Ancient One. " _What have we here_?"

Trevelyan turned around to see Leliana running to them, copper hair flying. She stopped at the sight of her wife, staggering.

He felt a glimmer of hope when he saw a change in Ria's expression- the pitch black fell away from her sclera, and he could see the whites of her eyes again. She stumbled forward, suddenly feeling the pain of her injuries.

"Argh!" she growled, falling to the ground and clawing at her head. But then his hopes plummeted when he saw her rise again, eyes completely black.

"'Tis worse than I feared," said Morrigan, eyeing the Darkspawn beyond the fissure.

The rest of the Inner Circle ran to catch up, taking care not to fall from the other narrow bridge to the island.

"Maxwell!" shouted Cassandra, and Trevelyan felt his heart lift at her voice. Their eyes met, and he saw the relief in hers. He gave her a nod.

A massive yellow dragon shook the ground with each step. The Ancient One let out a low rumble at the new enemy. She communicated with the black dragon in her harsh language and the two beasts lunged at each other.

The last of the warriors arrived, and they all lined up to face Ria together. Fear and disbelief were on every one of their faces, but they drew their weapons without hesitation.

"Ria…" said Leliana, looking as though she would collapse. Vivienne supported her by the arm. She shook her head.

"Leliana, I'm so sorry but… there is nothing we can do," said the mage, glancing at Ria's advancing form.

The spymaster pulled away from her. "Then you will kill her? How _could_ you!" She trained the tips of her daggers at Vivienne, eyes flashing. "I can't let her die. I _won't_. Not after _everything_ we've been through!"

A harsh laugh from the Ancient One made them all jump. Ria turned her eyes on them.

" _There is nothing you can do for this human- she is dead._ I _am the master of her body now_."

"You _lie_!" spat Leliana venomously. "I _know_ she is in there! I have seen it!"

Vivienne shook her head. "Even if she is, we have no way of bringing her out again."

"Wait," said the Herald. "There was a moment-"

As if on cue, the Ancient One doubled over, snarling. Then Ria surfaced, gripping her head and falling to her knees.

The spymaster tried to run to her, but Cassandra and Vivienne held her back.

"Not yet, it's too dangerous!" the Seeker warned her.

Morrigan and Solas encased the knight in a double prison of ice and electricity.

"There may be some resistance- we can overpower her long enough to discuss the next step," suggested Morrigan.

"That won't hold for long," said Solas, shaking his head. "We must talk quickly."

"Did you know about the Old God in Ria?" asked Trevelyan.

The elf gestured at Leliana. "She pieced it together… we were hoping the theory was incorrect."

Varric shook his head, wiping tears away. He considered the frozen form of the knight.

"Poor girl… she didn't deserve this. Maker's breath, I had a feeling this wouldn't end well."

"Then we must make a decision quickly. Morrigan, do you have an idea?"

Maxwell jumped at the roars and snapping sounds overhead as the two dragons wrestled with each other. He eyed the armies of Darkspawn warily as they hissed and snarled beyond the fissures of the precipice.

The witch pinched the bridge of her nose, sighing. "I am _thinking_ ," she said irritably. "Though this is proving difficult. Vivienne is right- killing her would be one solution."

At this, Leliana wrenched herself away from Alistair and Vivienne.

"Then _think_ of another way!" she shouted desperately.

But before any of them could speak, there was a deep rumbling as the layers of ice cracked behind them.

Maxwell drew his weapon.

"She's breaking out!"

"Prepare to subdue her!" Vivienne shouted.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

There was pain. Agonizing pain as Ria's control fluctuated.

Her entire body was screaming, burning in protest. She was sure her tibia on both sides were broken- putting her weight on them was out of the question. And the temperature… it was like a blazing furnace.

Ria struggled to breathe, gagging. Her gasps came out in a stridor.

She doubled over, stumbling from the vertigo. Everything was blurry, everything was red. All she could make out was the face of her wife.

 _Leliana… Leliana…_ she thought desperately.

Ria was on her knees, clutching her head. It felt like someone was sawing into her head, but the pain was internal and unreachable. She clawed at her skull, letting out a tortured scream.

"Ria!" she heard her wife call out.

"Hurry!" said Solas. "Contain her!"

With a jolt of panic, she felt an arctic cold wrap around her, freezing her limbs. Her breathing grew ragged now, struggling to lift her head above the ice. Tendrils of electricity chained her arms and legs, stemming the bloodflow.

"Stop there! You'll kill her!" shouted Leliana angrily.

"This is the only way to immobilize her!" shot back Morrigan. "Do you think the Old God will let her body die?"

Ria blinked rapidly as she started slipping out of consciousness.

 _Maker, help me... I can't…_

A low laugh resounded in her head.

 _Call to your Maker, beg him on your knees. It makes no difference!_

She felt a surge of power, and everything turned ruby red. The ice around her melted again, and she broke free. The surgeon heard herself laugh with the Ancient One.

" _You think to chain me down, mortals?_ " the Old God rumbled. " _None of you shall leave here alive!_ "

And with that, he unleashed his fury, his unquenchable wrath. There was an explosive blast that tossed the heroes for yards like rag dolls. Within the radius, the rocks and the earth were carved into a deep, burning crater.

The dwarf was the nearest, staggering as he rose. He shook his head.

"Don't do this, kid! It's me, Varric! You have to break through!"

The Old God smiled mockingly. _"Useless. All useless. Now do_ not _stand-in-my-way!"_ he roared, smashing the sword down. The burning blade crashed into the ground, the energy released sending another linear tremor toward the group.

He was satisfied to see the irritating dwarf tumble to the earth, rolling to the right and hitting his head on the rocks. To the left, the mages were hurling thunderbolts, blizzards and activating fire mines about him. The Ancient One grimaced in displeasure. Too much damage, and this body may become completely unusable. He thrust out a hand to smite them, a dark vortex of energy sending the three of them flying.

Laughing, he turned to the charging warriors. With barely a flick of the wrist, he parried their blades and toyed with them. One swing here, one swing there. Another parry, a double swipe. Oh, it was just too easy.

The golden eyed witch hit his arm with a spell, breaking the bone. He dropped the shield he was holding. No matter, the sword was all he needed.

With a snarl, he smacked the female's sword away and slammed her into the rocks savagely. Next, he disarmed the Qunari and hurled him at a boulder with his bare hand. One wide sweep, and the Warden was knocked unconscious. The so called Herald growled and lunged again, locking his sword with the Old God's.

" _Die!"_ he said, batting the man's weapon aside.

The sword fell from his grip, and the warrior backed away, fear in his eyes. Ria's possessor brought the silver sword up high, and then down… only to have it stop inches away from the man's chest. He snarled at the witch's trick.

With titanic strength, another few blows eliminated the ward. But before he could move, the red haired female lunged at him, daggers whipping fast. He hastily kicked the man's neck, knocking him unconscious to turn his attention to the woman. The Old God met all her furious swipes with ease, even with one functioning arm. While fighting, he made sure to send another whirlwind at the witch, who dodged it. But the violet tornado followed her, striking her in the back. With a laugh, the Ancient One focussed on the spymaster, catching one of her daggers on his hilt. He flicked it away.

"Ria!" she said, and he frowned in irritation.

" _She is_ mine _, fool!_ "

He slashed viciously at her, drawing a long wound.

The woman spun away, panting and clutching the gash on her arm. "Ria!" she persisted, eyes bright and determined. "My love! You _must_ break through, come back to me!"

 _Come back to me..._

And then the host's memories came flooding in, breaking his concentration. The blade clattered to the ground as the body's perception of pain returned. He struggled to suppress the signal transmission and regain control. His vision flickered on and off, with breathing swinging from ragged to even and then back again. Ria began to break through the barriers with shocking ease. The Ancient One snarled as he wrestled with her, but what he saw drove a wedge into his command of her soul. The silver sword reflected a blinding white light, causing him to cover Ria's eyes.

Leliana... handing to her the Silver Sword of Mercy, and the hope in her eyes as she did. _You expected me to survive._

And Leliana running to her on the light of the sun, copper hair like the maples of autumn, blue eyes shining with recognition. Tears falling as she told her the truth- that Ria was Kallian reincarnated. Every memory rushed by like a whirlwind, bending time to its will...

But then the Old God shoved these thoughts aside with a sweep of power, gathering his energy to strike. He shattered the pane of her mind with a vicious blow and Ria fell under his control again. He smiled with Ria's lips, satisfied. But then he frowned in displeasure as he saw the woman had bought time for the witch to regain consciousness. She was holding a hand to her head, still on her knees. No matter, he would deal with this one first.

The ground trembled and cracked but the Old God paid no attention. He growled and struck the hooded woman's chest with the flat of the blade. The force was so strong the crack of bones pierced the air above the crumbling and roaring. It flung her backwards, skidding across the hard ground. She cried out in pain with each jolt of her ribs.

" _Enough!_ " he growled in a scraping voice. " _Your persistence wearies me._ "

But the woman was not done. She lay broken on the ground, her breath shallow. "… the Maker… the Maker brought you to me."

 _Pathetic human._

Again, he held the flaming sword up high and laughed loudly, manically. _"I am free!_ Free _to roam the world! Look upon this face, and be honoured to die at my hands!"_

The flaming blade came down to the body...

Blood soaked through lower down, flesh hissing as it burned. A scream escaped the woman's lips, but was buried under the loud rumble from the ground. A violent tremor made him stagger as the blade sank, and a giant fist of rock slammed into the Old God. The armour clanked and groaned as Ria's body hit the rocks...

And Ria broke through, gasping as though she had been underwater.

Her vision returned, the blood red just specks in the periphery. The headache was still there, but a dull ache in her cranium. Her limbs and torso, however, were searing in agony again. She stared at the murky green sky, thunder and lightning heralding a storm. Black rocks levitated in the air, and she could hear the hisses and shrieks of Darkspawn all around. There was the distant roar of dragons and of fire.

"Quickly Morrigan!" she heard Trevelyan say.

Ria felt the freezing ice creep up her limbs to her neck… then her brain. She couldn't breathe, she couldn't think.

Everything slowed down- her breathing, her thoughts, her vision, her heart…

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The witch remained silent, watching the barbarically giant Qunari help the thin elf up.

"Thank you," said Solas, holding a hand to his head.

Everyone was bleeding and injured.

Morrigan glanced at the still form of Leliana, an inexplicable emotion rising in her.

 _Perhaps I am not immune to human emotions after all…_

The dwarf was continually shaking his bleeding head, waving the crossbow he called Bianca about as he spoke.

"This wasn't supposed to happen! It's all my fault!"

Cassandra sighed. "It's not your fault, Varric. It's…"

Varric didn't seem to hear. "I can't bear to look at this," he said, burying his face in his hands.

Solas kneeled next to Vivienne, who was examining the wound.

"Is there any hope?"

"I don't know," said the mage in a strained voice. She sighed. "I have not Ria's experience to ascertain what is viable and what is not. If only the blade hadn't been enchanted…"

The mention of Ria's name brought Morrigan back to the matter. "There may be another way to kill the Old God."

Seeing the knight encased in ice, her colour draining away and her body unmoving…

"There is?" asked Alistair quickly.

Everyone stared at her.

"But either way…" she turned her golden eyes to the group. "Someone must die."

The Herald followed her gaze, as did the others.

There was a flicker of understanding in the Warden's face as she spoke. He left Leliana's side to step forwards. Everyone ignored the dragons as they crashed against a distant cliff.

"Then I will do it," he said, determination on his face. "She died in my place during the Blight. Now it's my turn."

The witch regarded him a moment before nodding.

"Wait, what?" asked Varric. "But doesn't the Warden have to kill-"

"No time," snapped Morrigan, cutting him off. "We must begin."

As if agreeing with her, the entire Fade shook with a force that could shake the heavens.

Alistair walked to the frozen body of Ria, and the witch felt another strange pang in her chest. She shook her head. Now was not the time for such weakness.

Briefly, she explained the plan to the others.

"Will it work?" asked the dwarf hopefully.

"I cannot guarantee success," said the witch grimly. "But it is imperative that we make the attempt."

Everyone turned with heavy gazes to the Warden.

"Are you sure about this?" said Varric.

Alistair nodded. "I've never been more certain in my life."

"Then may you be at peace with the Maker," said Cassandra, her eyes sad.

The others murmured their goodbyes and the volunteer gazed down at Kallian.

"Tell her…" he started to say.

Morrigan looked at him.

"Tell her I loved her. And-" he choked. "And to always see the dawn, not dusk."

The witch's golden eyes softened as she remembered. Then she nodded. She raised her staff and shifted the ice, rearranging it. The frozen block gradually increased in thickness and she channelled some of the energy into the flesh, through bone and finally into what Ria would call the mediastinum.

All of the heroes stood there, almost fascinated, as the knight's shallow breath slowed even further. It slowed to a halting stop. Her chest stopped rising and falling. No one could see it, but Morrigan knew the heart had stopped also.

She was dead.

The witch held her breath, fearing the worst. Dread raced through her fleetingly, but she took a hold of herself.

' _Tis up to fate to decide._

Then…

There was a hair-raising scream, and Morrigan had one glimpse of a dragon's head rise out of Ria before a blinding light dominated her vision.


	32. Chapter 30: In Retrospect

**CHAPTER 30: In Retrospect**

Ria stared down at her wife, not quite registering what had happened. To the left, she saw Alistair's body. And she couldn't help thinking… that his death was for nothing. That her survival was for nothing.

She pried Varric and Vivienne's fingers away from her arms. The absence of their support made her tortured limbs collapse. But she didn't care, she didn't need it.

What she needed… what she needed, was for someone to tell her this was a joke.

That Leliana was pretending to be asleep. That the blood and burns on her abdomen were fake.

With a torn hand, she dragged herself along the ground to her wife's side.

"Ria…" Varric started to say, his voice thick with emotion.

The surgeon didn't hear him as she placed a shaking hand on Leliana's face. Those long eyelashes, the straight nose, the cherry lips… even with grime and blood smeared across it, her face was beautiful.

"Leliana?" she heard herself say, as if detached from her body. "Leliana… you can wake up now."

There was no response.

"Ria, we…" tried Vivienne, then her voice trailed off at the woman's expression.

 _Please... Maker, take me now_ , she begged weakly, shaking her head. _I can't live anymore... I can't._

Then the weight of reality came crashing down. A violent tremor ran through Ria's body. She felt the tears flow, hot liquid burning a path down her cheeks. She could feel. She could feel every pain sensation in her body.

More importantly, she could feel the annihilating agony of loss.

 _Leliana…_

"Leliana…" she whispered out loud. Her voice shook with each sob, growing more pronounced by the second. "By the Maker, wake up! You can't be gone… you can't be!"

Everything they'd been through… every promise, every word said… it couldn't be…

"You're all I have, dammit!" she sobbed, voice cracking. She grasped her wife's pale hand. It was cold.

Ria bowed her head, gritting her teeth as the tears came down without end. She knelt for Maker knows how long, rocking back and forth as she cried, howling like a wolf. She wasn't even aware of the tremors or the sounds of Darkspawn. After a while the sobs died down, replaced by a cold numbness. As if she had been standing in the rain for hours, drenched through to the bone. The knight's face was ashen, bloodless. She couldn't speak anymore, she couldn't think. She was as powerless as she was on that night- the night when her father died.

Trevelyan kneeled by her, putting a hand on her shoulder.

"Ria," he said gently. "I know this was a shock for you."

The surgeon didn't hear him, didn't want to hear him. She knelt there, unable to move her shaking limbs. Her mind was dominated by devastation.

"But we need you to see if she can live…" the Herald continued. "You're all we have. You need to concentrate."

At this, the surgeon felt a jolt in her body.

The memory flashed in her head, loud and clear:

" _There's no one else to repair it, you're all we have. You need to concentrate."_

 _The surgeon didn't respond. She stared down at the blood gushing from her father's mouth, the liquid flowing out from his nose._

" _Suction!"_

 _And she stood there… she stood there…_

Her eyes snapped open to see Leliana. And by some miracle, her hands gradually stopped shaking. Ria gazed down at her wife's face… so peaceful, serene. The surgeon's eyes burned with determination, alert and ready. She eyed the angle of the ribcage and winced. But her wife was still breathing... there was nothing she could do for the chest at the moment... but there was a sliver of hope.

Ria took her pulse- alarmingly faint, she was tachycardic, tachypneic, bp probably way down, unresponsive. The chances were slim... very slim. But she had to try.

There was one problem: she had no surgical tools.

"Give me a dagger," she said mechanically.

Trevelyan handed her one.

"General anaesthesia."

She let Morrigan inject some into Leliana.

"Ventilation," she said to the witch. "Keep expanding her intravascular fluid volume, give vasopressors and warm her up."

Ria then turned to Vivienne. "Stabilize her ribcage and my left wrist."

"Solas, sterilize my hands and the dagger."

"Understood."

She didn't even check to see them nod. Ria tore the armour open and lifted the shirt to examine the wound. A wave of nausea came over her when she saw it. The skin was scorched, blistering and weeping, bloody strands of flesh barely holding together. She shook her head clear.

"Vivienne, clean the skin around the wound, heal the burns if you can and seal it."

Ria watched as the blood was washed off. She felt herself relax a little as the burns improved- she hadn't expected full healing. Even magic had its limits. But with the right care, it would clear in time. Taking a deep breath, she made a midline incision with the dagger. Then she paused, her hand shaking violently.

The situation reminded her horribly of the night her father died. The resistance of the layers... the unbearable burden of a life in her hands.

Ria swallowed the lump in her throat, taking another deep breath. When she peered inside, blood gushed out like a river and she had trouble steadying her hand again.

 _No, not now… not when her life is on the line…_

She picked up the dagger- it clattered to the ground. Ria gritted her teeth and stilled the hand with the other. She picked the weapon up again.

"Morrigan, she needs fresh blood."

Vivienne rummaged in Ria's pack. She handed her bags of red blood cells, FFP and cryoprecipitate the mages had been able to produce by fractionation. Morrigan collected the blood with magic and transferred it to the gash on Leliana's arm. It disappeared into the vessels beneath.

Ria swayed, dizzy from her own blood loss. Varric steadied her with his hands.

"Suction."

Solas removed the remainder of the blood. Ria looked again, and felt relief- the abdominal contents were now visible. It was a start.

But her relief was short lived- apart from the continuous thundering and the tremors, she heard the shrieking of approaching Darkspawn. Ria whipped her head around and her heart missed a beat. There was a whole line of them approaching.

 _How did they get past the fissure?_

"We've got it, kid!" said Varric, scrambling to his feet. "Keep fixing her!" he yelled as he fired his bolts.

Together, Trevelyan, Cassandra and Iron Bull rushed to meet the wave of monsters.

 _Shit_ , Ria thought, turning her eyes back to Leliana.

 _Don't think about them, don't think._

She continued the exploration, peeling the mesentery away to see the small bowel and the colon. Turning it around, she felt a boulder sized weight drop into her stomach. Despair crashed down on her again and she tried not to vomit.

The small bowel and a part of the ascending colon were torn, charred and ischemic. All around the organs, the tissue was sickeningly black. Blood continued to spill out, and Ria regained focus with difficulty. Solas drained the leak again and the surgeon cut along the line of Toldt. She reflected the left colon, spleen, kidney and tail of the pancreas to the midline.

 _So much blood,_ she thought helplessly.

She could see the entire aorta now, right down to the bifurcation. Then she saw it: the superior mesenteric artery, along with its branches.

"Vivienne, seal the vessels."

She guided the mage in identifying each and every one, nodding in satisfaction with each success. In this situation, magic was definitely more efficient than ligation. Sweat gathered on her forehead as she stole glances at the advancing Darkspawn. The warriors were holding them off, but if she didn't hurry…

 _Focus._

For the next few minutes, she and Vivienne laboured in finding and sealing the damaged vessels, then closed the ureter. But she had yet to tend to the bowels, which were beyond recognition now. And there were so many more structures she needed to check- not to mention she had no idea whether the ribs had damaged any organs in the chest.

There was a sudden deafening roar as a dragon swooped down behind. Ria panicked until realizing it was the yellow dragon- it must have killed the other. Blazing fire spilled out from its jaws and bathed the armies of Darkspawn.

"Okay guys, it's time to _run_!" bellowed Varric, shooting the bolts backwards.

 _No,_ she thought desperately. _I need more time!_

There could be bleeding from an organ she hadn't examined- a gash, burns, nerve injury… Ria felt another wave of dread as everyone took up their weapons. Vivienne partially healed the bowels and closed up the wound hastily.

Ria stood up but collapsed as the pain returned. She cried out in frustration.

Strong arms swept her up and Ria felt her vision blur from the change in position.

"Hang in there, Ria!" said Trevelyan, looking down at her.

"Alistair's body!" shouted Morrigan.

"On it!" said Iron Bull, hefting the weight onto his shoulders.

"Leliana," Ria said, choking.

"Cassandra has her, don't worry," said Maxwell.

 _It wasn't enough,_ she found herself thinking, tears stinging her eyes. _It wasn't enough..._

And the last thing Ria saw was her wife's autumn hair and the glowing green portal of the Breach.

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 _Shadows flicked past in her vision. When they turned to face her, she glimpsed burning emerald eyes before they disappeared. Ria walked through the mist, not knowing where she was going. But she looked around curiously, fascinated by the mystery of this realm._

 _Was it the Fade? Or was it some place she had conjured up in the labyrinth of her mind? Ria suddenly found that she couldn't move. The mist around her legs cleared and she looked down to see chains binding her ankles._

 _Further ahead, she heard voices and tried to listen._

" _Ria c_ _ome here, onto mummy's lap."_

 _The mist parted again to reveal her mother with a one year old Ria. The baby giggled and waved her arms about. Her mother smiled and shook her head, pointing to the objects._

" _Look here, Ria, what's this? What has mummy got for you?"_

 _Ria finally stared at the objects: a pencil and a coin, part of the ritual done when babies turned one. She reached out a tiny hand uncertainly, indecisive. Then… she picked up the pencil._

 _Her mother made a noise of delight, hugging her daughter. "Oh, well done, well done!"_

 _Her father came into view and Ria felt her throat constrict._

" _She picked the pencil: I'm thinking she might be a doctor, or a lawyer someday_ _,_ _" her mother said to him._

 _He took Ria from her mother, bobbing her up and down in the air. "You can be anything you want, Ria. Anything you want."_

 _The mist converged again, obscuring them from view._

 _Then she looked down to see a second chain and the scene changed to the kitchen at home._

 _The lights were off, but Ria could make out the outline of everything on the table in the moonlight. The long necks of empty bottles, the scrunched up pieces of paper, the scraps of food. There was a figure curled up in the corner, shivering violently. She was looking at herself._

 _There were footsteps as her brother came down the stairs. He switched the lights on and his gaze took in the mess on the table and his sister on the ground. Roy eyed in her disgust and started walking back up again. The surgeon hurled a bottle at the wall, which shattered into pieces. Her brother ran back downstairs and shoved her hard. Ria stumbled and slammed against the bench behind her._

 _"You think you're a good boy, huh?" she slurred. "Think you're Mr Perfect? Well I've got news for you- you're just a bitch like I am!"_

 _Roy punched her. In her drunken state, she didn't have a chance. Ria laughed hysterically as he pushed her to the floor._

 _"Think you could do better in my position?" she said, chuckling like a maniac._

 _"Shut up!" Roy said, grabbing the front of her shirt._

 _"Hit me again," she taunted._

 _"I said, shut your mouth!" her brother shouted._

 _Ria answered with another laugh._

 _"What's going on here!" came her mother's voice. In the light, the woman's face was even more pale and gaunt than usual, the lines of her face deep and numerous. She took in her daughter's face, the blood from cutting herself on shards of glass, and her son standing over Ria. Her mother buried her face in her hands._

 _"I can't take this anymore, I just can't," she moaned. Then she pried Roy's fingers away from Ria's shirt and shook her head at her daughter. "I won't tolerate this. I won't tolerate this anymore. Get out of this house- I expect you gone by the morning," she said firmly, and pulled her son with her upstairs._

 _The surgeon sat there and leaned her head back on the bench. She sighed and closed her eyes, no longer laughing..._

 _Ria had no memory of this event. But her family's cold dismissal of her the next morning told her all she needed to know. To see it excavated from her mind... it disgusted her._ _She buried her face in her hands, wanting to carve out this scene from her head._

 _The mist covered her view again and Ria watched in agony as all of her life played out before her- the drinking, the gambling, the drugs, the betrayals..._

 _And the next scene was by far the worst. Ria was forced to relive the memory of her father's death again._

 _She stared down at her father's blood soaked body, paralyzed. She saw the callused hands, the lines on his face and the grey hair. And she realized... she had been no better than him._

I'm so sorry...

 _McFenton moved to put his hands on her shoulders, his voice urgent._

" _There's no one else to repair it, you're all we have. You need to concentrate."_

 _The weight around her ankles lifted and she saw that the shackles were gone._

 _Then Ria felt tears run silently down her face as she saw herself meet Mother Giselle, the long talks they had, her time with Leliana..._

 _Suddenly the mist parted and she was on top of a hill._

 _The sky was a dazzling blue, reminiscent of strokes of water colour. And she saw her wife on the grass, sleeping peacefully. Or rather, unconscious with a blistering gash in her abdomen and sickeningly crushed ribs._

 _Ria felt the horror of that moment rush back to her. Felt the despair, the numbness, the helplessness..._

" _Leliana!" she said, falling to her knees._

No… no, not again _, she thought, tearing at her hair._ You're all that I have... I'm nothing without you...

 _The sky was a glassy cerulean dome, the green like the emerald glow of the Arbor Wilds. The light was so blinding in this place that it hurt to look at her surroundings. Was this a cruel joke? That her wife would die in this beautiful realm?_

 _She could feel the woman's hand in hers, soft and delicate. But cold... so terribly cold. Her tears were scorching as they welled up in her eyes._

" _Leliana…" she said, choking and sobbing._

 _Helpless. Useless!_

 _Ria hated herself so much she could die. Hated herself with every fibre of her being._

You don't deserve this, _she thought, grasping her wife's hands._ You don't deserve any of this. I deserve to die, not you!

 _It seemed like a lifetime went by as she knelt there, despairing and crying like a fool. And then…_

 _Warmth seeped into her hands. She looked up to see a healthy glow return to her wife's face. Ria watched, transfixed. The burns cleared up and the colour returned to her wife's fingertips._

 _Invisible hands opened the incision and lifted the mesentery. Ria gaped._

What...

 _She couldn't believe it. The entire ascending colon and small bowel were healed, the mucosa smooth and glistening. The surrounding structures were all without blemish. She saw some of the arteries and veins she had missed. Blood flowed like a river, but it stopped, sliding back to the vessels. It was like they were sucking them up._

 _The opposing ends of the cut liver melded together like clay. The brutal tears in the vessels closed up and even the needle thin nerves she hadn't seen were healed. The webs of blackened mesentery lightened and filled out again. And the burns peeled away like scales. Thankfully, Ria had done most of what should have been done. But what she could not do, what magic could not do... was being done by this presence._

 _Leliana vanished into the air, leaving the surgeon still kneeling on the grass. And suddenly… Ria understood._

 _Mother Giselle's words came back to her: "many times, the Maker uses our past failures for future success. To present to you a much greater happiness."_

 _A greater happiness… a greater happiness. The words echoed in her mind._

 _Ria looked down at her hands. These hands had failed so many times, so many! But..._

 _Becoming a surgeon was no accident- she had saved countless lives, here and in the other world._

 _Killing the assassin was no accident- it gained her entry into the Inner Circle. Her past drinking habits were not an accident- the lessons from that had helped her kill Florianne. Being the one to kill the Archdemon, meeting Leliana..._

 _The spymaster's dream from the Maker… was no accident._

 _The surgeon laughed in the sunless world, falling back on the grass. Tears streamed down her face as she gazed up at the sky…and then the world exploded into a shower of shattered blue and white, the source of light never to be seen._

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"Leave her be, Varric. She's sleeping," tutted a voice.

"You know Vivienne… you can be _really_ bossy," said another.

The woman sighed. "You would be also if you were in my position. I am constantly surrounded by reckless men."

"If you want reckless, Cassandra's twice as reckless as any man."

"I must agree with you there," said another male voice.

Ria opened her eyes and saw a blur of colours. But then she adjusted and blinked at the wooden ceiling.

The surgeon tried to swallow, but her throat felt sandpaper dry. She sat up to see the mage, Varric and Dorian standing around her bed.

"Ria…" said the dark skinned woman. "How do you feel?"

It took a moment for the surgeon to find her voice. "I feel… better."

Vivienne's shoulders relaxed and her eyes became gentle. "I am glad to hear that. We were very worried, my dear."

Varric nodded. "It's good to see you healthy, kid."

"We've all been dying for you to wake," said the Tevinter mage.

"How long was I out?"

"You have been slipping in and out of consciousness for a week now," said the mage, shaking his head. "It took all of our mages to heal your wounds."

"It really is a wonder that you survived," said Vivienne. "Dragging your broken body around like that... That Old God treated you no better than a rag doll. It was no easy task."

"So that's what it was… an Old God," said Ria quietly.

"Looks like it," said Varric, shrugging. "Only an Old God would have killed Corypheus like that."

Ria nodded numbly. It was the end- Corypheus was dead, and they had won. She couldn't believe it. Then she asked the question she was half dreading, half _dying_ to ask.

"And Leliana?" she asked hoarsely, her voice hardly more than a whisper.

They all exchanged glances.

The mage sighed, shaking her head. "The angle of her ribcage when we examined her was horrendous but… "

 _I knew it,_ thought Ria in despair. _Her ribs... it wasn't enough. Her lungs... or maybe a cardiac tamponade..._

Vivienne shook her head again. "I only wish I could have protected it better. One more inch and the ribs could have pierced the organs."

Varric rolled his eyes. "Don't worry about her, kid. She's alive and well."

Ria let out a shuddering breath of relief, her whole body becoming slack. She felt like she'd run a mile. She didn't even bother asking about the abdominal contents- she knew the answer.

The knight held her head with shaking hands and braced her elbows on the bed.

Dorian patted her on the back. "Easy, surgeon. It's all over now… it's all over."

The surgeon took in a deep breath, trying to regain control. After a while, her tremors subsided and she lifted her head.

There was no time to waste.

Ria shakily rolled over to sit on the edge of the bed. She noticed that her legs were in splints and remembered both tibias were broken. Varric handed her the crutches and she took them.

"Don't push yourself too hard, my dear," said Vivienne, concerned. "Your muscles will still be very weak. Thankfully we were able to heal the fracture in your left wrist but…"

As if on cue, Ria stumbled as her arms struggled to keep her up.

"Great… thanks for the warning."

"We'll come with you," said the dwarf, patting her back. "It's a long way to Leliana's room."

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Varric knocked on the door for her and a servant opened it. The elf smiled and bowed to the surgeon.

"Ser Ria, it is good to see you awake. The lady has been waiting a long time."

Ria nodded, feeling her chest constrict already- and she hadn't even seen her wife yet.

She swung into the room on crutches, and her eyes turned to the woman on the bed. When she saw her, Ria felt paralyzed.

Blue eyes met hers, bright and trembling.

For a few minutes, they gazed at each other, drinking in each other's presence. That intelligent gaze, the kissable lips, that precious body... one that had suffered so many times. Beaten, tortured, exploited. And she had thrown herself into danger for Ria. Nearly _died_ for her.

Ria felt a tremor shake her body again as she laughed, tears falling like rain.

Similarly, her wife covered her mouth as she sobbed, her own tears flowing. Ria drank in those eyes like a lifeline to heaven. She was here... she was here!

They both laughed like crazy for a while before Ria reached the bed with impatient swings of the crutches. She wanted so much, _so_ much to draw her into her arms. But the bandage around her wife's torso was another reminder of the horror that occurred. Instead, she collapsed on the ground and kneeled, shaking her head at the floor. She couldn't look up, couldn't bring herself to look at that face.

"I'm so sorry," she said through gritted teeth. "I'm so sorry… so sorry…"

Ria kept repeating those words- it was never going to be enough. She couldn't forgive herself.

"Ria, my love…"

She felt fingers running through her hair. But Ria couldn't stop shaking her head at the ground.

"I hurt you. Maker, I can't believe I…"

Then the hand lifted her head. Leliana was smiling. Her blue eyes sparkling, rejoicing.

"It doesn't matter, my love. I am here, Ria. I am here for you."

Dorian came over to help her onto the bed. Ria sat on the edge, looking at her wife helplessly.

"By the Maker," breathed Ria, her eyes swollen. She raised a shaking hand to her wife's cheek. "I thought… I thought…"

Leliana took her head in her hands and gave her a long, passionate kiss.

Ria tasted salt as their tears mingled but didn't care. Leliana buried her slender hands in Ria's hair.

"I am here, my love."

The surgeon brushed a lock of red hair away from her eyes tenderly. "Yes, you are," she said, voice cracking. "Thank the Maker, yes you are."

Her eyes were so bright, so bright…

"I love you so much," said Ria, trying to fight down another wave of tears. "I love you so damn much."

"And I you," said Leliana.

Ria looked down at the bandages and let out a shaky laugh. "I wish I hadn't cracked your ribs…"

The Orlesian smiled, eyes soft and gentle. "It is only for a while- they are aligned now and the organs checked. The mages will heal them today."

"That's a relief," said the surgeon, swallowing. "I can't stand not hugging you right now," she said, choking.

Leliana bit her lower lip, smiling suggestively. "Only that?"

By the Maker! Even in this situation…

Ria laughed and sobbed again, covering her mouth with a hand. "Everything... everything," she said. "I need all of you."

Then she took Leliana's head in her hands and kissed her.

They held each other like that for a very long time, oblivious to their surroundings.

Ria kept staring at her wife's face, couldn't believe she was alive. Couldn't believe she forgave her. She remembered her dream and laughed. She laughed and cried, touching those perfect cheeks with bandaged hands. And Leliana's eyes shone with light… the light of the Maker.

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In the background, Vivienne wiped her tears with a handkerchief. Dorian and Varric smiled at the pair. For a time, they watched the reunion in respectful silence. Then, after a while, they turned to go and let the pair have time together.

The three stepped out into the corridor and started walking down to the throne room.

"Well," said Dorian. "There's a very happy ending."

"Indeed," said the other mage. "Maker knows the two of them deserve this."

"This is definitely worth writing about... and the hero _survives_ for once."

"Thinking of writing another book?" asked Dorian, chuckling. "You still haven't finished the romance series."

"Cassandra will be waiting for the next volume," said Vivienne.

"Oh, I'll get around to that," said Varric, laughing. "Besides, she can use the time to have some _real_ romance."

"Trevelyan will want some help with poetry then," commented Dorian.

The dwarf laughed again, but then he sniffled. "Ah, I must be getting old... getting too soft for my own good."

Vivienne gave him the handkerchief.

"Thanks."

After wiping his tears, he stared at it.

"Wait a minute, isn't this mine?" he asked, frowning.

The mage raised her eyebrow. "Varric, you _gave_ it to me two months ago."

"I did?" the dwarf asked, scratching his head. "But Andraste's ass, did you drag it through Crestwood or something? It looks filthy as wyvern shit!"

"…"

Dorian covered his face with a hand, sighing. And he walked along with them, listening to their bickering in amused silence.

It seemed Varric had found a new victim to irritate.

 ** _Sorry about making you lot go through the previous chapter like that. I know it was a bit of a scare but it's all good stuff now. Just to let you know this is NOT the end- there's another chapter after this. I will upload soon :)_**


	33. Chapter 31: Epilogue

_**So this is it, the very last chapter of the story. Thank you all for the enthusiasm and for sticking with this till the end. Honestly, I didn't think I'd get such a positive response. It was really something I wrote to cheer myself up lol.**_

 _ **Also, sorry for all the alerts that are probably in your inboxes... I had to re upload some of the chapters as I accidentally deleted one of them and everything was out of order. Most of it is exactly the same- I've just made very minor changes.**_

 _ **But thanks a lot guys and hope you liked how it turned out. Of course, there are still a lot of things I could improve on. It was challenging to write, especially because of all the things I had to keep track of- the characters, the dialogue and the ideas I was inserting into each chapter. Hopefully the flaws in it weren't too distracting to keep you from enjoying it.**_

 _ **Also, some of you asked about Trespasser and I have decided to make it a mini sequel. I just couldn't make it fit at the end. D**_ _ **on't know how long that will take though since I'm working on Kallian's story as well...**_

 _ **But anyway, enjoy the last episode of this fanfic!**_

 **CHAPTER 31:**

 **EPILOGUE: Your Eyes, My Heart**

"And so now you see," said the Mother, smiling at her.

For some reason, Ria heard Johnny Nash's _I Can See Clearly Now_ playing inside her head. She snorted to herself.

The Mother blinked. "Does something amuse you?"

"Never mind. Continue."

"As I was saying, it has been a long time since your appearance in the Hinterlands. During your journey, I have watched you grow from a distraught, hardened woman to a passionate, honourable hero." The woman took Ria's hands in hers. "I am so proud of you, my child."

The surgeon nodded, smiling widely.

"It wasn't a journey I took on my own," she said. "If not for you, I would have stayed that way."

"Perhaps. But ultimately, it is your own decision to let go- to let go of your past and your fears, to embrace the joy that awaits in the future."

"I understand."

"Then live," said the Mother. "Live well and strong. Live in the grace of the Creator."

The surgeon blinked. "You sound like you're leaving."

"Not yet, but yes. I will be going to Val Royeaux for the election of the new Divine."

"Um… isn't that the College of Clerics?"

The Mother smiled at her.

"Wait… you're a Grand Cleric now?"

Mother Giselle chuckled. "Soon, I will be. And that is when I shall travel to Orlais."

Ria looked at her sadly. "I'm going to miss you- you've been like a mother to me."

The woman patted her on the cheek. "My dear child, I am not gone forever. I will visit you often, and make sure to talk when I can."

"I hope so, I need these deep conversations with you," said Ria, chuckling.

Mother Giselle smiled widely. "I will _always_ be there for you. Now go, you should be there for the ceremony."

"Oh shoot, you're right," said Ria. She glanced at her wrist habitually and then realized she didn't have a watch. "I lost track of the time."

The Mother chuckled. "You are not too late, I think," she said, glancing over the edge of the walkway. "Go quickly, join the others."

Ria nodded and sprinted down the stairs to the courtyard, bones fully healed. She smiled at the freedom of being able to walk without crutches.

For the past week she had to hop all around the castle, which was damn frustrating. While her right tibia was in a better shape, the fracture on the left was severely comminuted. But the mages healed it as soon as they were satisfied with the alignment. The result was quick and effective. She liked that about magic.

At last, she reached the courtyard, already packed with people. Cullen, Josephine, Leliana and the Herald were standing at the top of the stairs. The rest of the Inner Circle were on the ground, turning to smile at her. Ria nodded in response and was about to join them when a murmur rippled through the crowd. People pointed and whispered.

"And there she is!" said the Commander from above.

 _Wait, what?_

Ria felt incredibly self-conscious as everyone looked at her. Josie motioned for her to come up the steps. The knight walked through the crowd as it parted for her- they were clapping enthusiastically, hooting and whistling. Ria took one step at a time, slightly dazed by the overwhelming noise and attention. It was like the game, only... everything was really happening and the heroic theme song wasn't playing in the background. But as she walked up the stairs to the top, seeing Cullen and Josephine's approving faces... a sudden feeling of destiny shot through her. Like she was _meant_ to be here. Like time had waited for her to stand where she was now, facing the Commander of the Inquisition.

Cullen gestured at her with a gloved hand.

"Ser Ria, also the famed Hero of Ferelden, chief surgeon and the defeater of Corypheus!"

There was another roar of approval from the crowd.

Ria felt herself cringe at the _defeater of Corypheus_ part. She didn't deserve the credit- it was really the Old God's doing.

The Commander held up a hand and the noise died down. He approached her.

"By her deeds and her skills, she has proven herself to be a worthy hero in her past and present life, a great protector of Thedas. No one can deny that her reward is long overdue. So it is with great joy that I present to her... the title Teyrna of Gwaren, as well as the wealth and estate of the previous Teyrn Loghain Mac Tir." He held up a long piece of parchment with a fancy wax seal at the bottom. Ria squinted at it, but couldn't make out the symbol. "In addition to this, the Empress of Orlais has gifted her a manor in Val Royeaux, as well as other offers of note. Hero of Ferelden, will you accept this from us?"

Ria stared, honoured but also completely taken by surprise. The offers were overwhelming- even as a surgeon, she had never been that rich. She paused, not knowing what to think- her reward was having her wife by her side, alive. She didn't really need anything more. But then she looked at the spymaster and thought about everything she had lost, everything she had been through. She deserved better, she deserved to be treated like the queen she was. And thinking of this, Ria looked Cullen in the eye and nodded.

"I will," she replied with certainty.

Josie beamed.

"Then it is done!"

Leliana walked forward now, holding out an elaborately decorated box. She signalled with her eyes for Ria to come.

 _Oh, right…_

The surgeon approached her wife and Leliana opened the lid. Inside, a flashy necklace was nestled in the velvet cushion. It looked almost Elizabethan, with a chain made of golden rings and onyx polished till they looked like liquid. Complex, twisting patterns of silver wove around a good sized sapphire hanging on the chain.

Leliana handed the box to a servant, and took the necklace. Her eyes shone with pride as she hung it around Ria's neck. They both took a moment to pause, gazes locked in silent communication. Blue met brown, ice met the darkness of night. Two souls irrevocably linked by the hand of fate.

 _We're here. We're finally here._

 _Yes, together. And I will always stay by your side._

 _As will I_ , Ria agreed.

The spymaster gave her hand a gentle squeeze. Then she stepped back to watch as Ria turned to face the crowd.

"Let all of Thedas welcome... the new Teyrna!"

A deafening cheer erupted in the crowd. Ria swept her gaze over them: at the people waving and tossing their hats in the air, at the soldiers in slings and missing limbs, at the nobles who had given steady support. She looked over at the others: Trevelyan, Varric, Iron Bull, Dorian, Josephine, Vivienne, Cullen, Leliana, Sera and Blackwall, who was in a neck brace.

But no Solas. The elf had disappeared without a word soon after the battle, before Ria had even woken up.

"But before we move onto celebrating," continued the Commander. "I would like to say some final words. Let us honour the deaths of all the brave soldiers who died fighting, those who perished in Haven and finally… the noble death of Warden Alistair. He was a hero of old, a man of duty and strength. Let us remember their passing with our hearts and honour them with a moment of silence."

The crowd suddenly grew still and quiet. Men and women bowed their heads in solemn remembrance. Ria, especially, felt her heart rip open at the mention of Alistair.

War... it would never leave without the payment of blood. Mother Giselle was right, its path would always lie on the bones of the dead.

Her eyes watered at the thought of his sacrifice. The memories they shared, the journey they took together… he had been like a brother to her.

 _Be at peace with the Maker, Alistair. You will be remembered._

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Morrigan tapped her long fingernails on the arm of the chair, thinking.

"Well, that is a _fascinating_ world you lived in."

Ria smiled, leaning back in the chair and lacing her fingers together.

"You could say that. Though the same could be said of _this_ world."

The witch nodded. "Magic is the air I breathe, the foundation of everything that happens in Thedas. The very idea of its absence is…"

"Alien."

"Yes," said Morrigan, smiling to reveal her teeth. "And you said you were transported to the Hinterlands?"

Ria nodded.

"That is most interesting," said the woman, golden eyes glinting. She tapped her fingers on the chair again, lost in thought.

"You have an idea, don't you?"

Morrigan looked at her quizzically. The surgeon grinned.

"You always get that look on your face when you have one."

The witch chuckled. "You know me too well."

Ria smiled. "It wasn't easy to get to know you- remember the fight we all had after the Circle Tower?"

Her friend laughed. "Yes… I daresay Alistair…" she started, her voice trailing off.

Ria grew sombre at the mention of the Warden. Morrigan seemed similarly affected.

"Tell me how you killed the Old God," said Ria, eyes grim.

Morrigan paused before replying. "'Twas not something I was certain about… but it was either that or kill you with a sword."

Ria nodded slowly, a heaviness in her heart.

"The idea occurred to me when you were encased in ice. Your breathing slowed, your pulse slowed and you lost consciousness. I thought: what is death but the cessation of respiration and blood flow to the heart, the loss of _function_ and movement? And so, if we could but mimic this for as long as we could without causing permanent damage, then perhaps we could transfer the Old God from your body…"

"To someone with the taint," finished Ria.

The witch nodded, sighing. "As you know, Alistair was the only candidate. Blackwall was left behind at the Arbor Wilds. And so, he volunteered."

Ria closed her eyes. She could see the Warden's face in her mind, clear as a mirror. The gelled up brown hair, the square jaw and the immature grin. She remembered their stupid conversations by the fire, his dry jokes and his awkward ways of cheering her up.

 _Alistair, you fool… why?_

It was a long while before Ria could speak again. She wiped the tears from her eyes, laughing humourlessly.

 _Maker… I'm crying so much these days._

She sighed before asking another question. "Do you know why the Old God was in me?"

Morrigan tapped on the armrest again. "It seems most likely that the Archdemon that you killed in the Blight was carried over with your soul to the reincarnated body."

"How can that happen?" said Ria, shaking her head in disbelief.

The witch turned her palms upward briefly. "How can you be the reincarnated Hero of Ferelden? I do not have all the answers. We can only think of the possibilities."

"Then do I still have the taint in my blood?"

Morrigan shook her head. "If you had, then you would have joined the Wardens in following the false Calling."

"Then how could the Old God still remain in me?"

The witch fingered her staff, golden eyes glinting. "Your souls may have been bound in the process of transferral or, perhaps I was wrong and you do have the taint in your blood- albeit an amount miniscule enough to escape the pull of the Calling."

"And why show up now? Why show up so late?"

"If I am not mistaken, it lay dormant in you during your time in the other world. Magic and the taint do not exist there… perhaps it was able to sense the change in its environment and gather enough strength to break out. After all, there is bound to be conflict between two souls in one body."

"So that's why I was having the migraines."

"I presume it was a struggle for domination. Though, of course, you could not have been aware of it."

Ria lapsed into silence, trying to absorb all of this. "Back in Coracavus, I was overwhelmed by the Darkspawn army…"

Morrigan blinked at this. "That was not in the report I heard…"

The surgeon gave her a pleading look. "I'd appreciate it if Leliana didn't know about this."

The witch's lips twitched but she signalled for her to continue.

"Anyway, in all honesty, I should have died that day. I was knocked down and any of them could have killed me… but they didn't. And at the time I was having that migraine."

"And you think they sensed the Old God in you," guessed Morrigan, nodding.

"Could it just be coincidence?"

"Perhaps…" said the witch, smiling. "One cannot always be entirely certain. But it does sound very convincing... my theory is that the migraines you were having were a manifestation of the Call."

"So all those armies I saw in the Fade- it was another Blight?"

"It seems that it was... the beginnings of it, yes."

"I can't believe it. I can't believe _I..._ led the next Blight."

The witch chuckled. "'Tis an amusing twist of fate, to bestow this task upon the one that ended the last Blight."

Ria held a hand to her head, overwhelmed by the revelations. "This is just crazy..." Then she lifted her head. "I have another question."

"Ask away," said Morrigan, amused.

"I wanted to talk about the Fade… it's weakening isn't it?"

The witch sighed. "There are many things about that realm that escapes our understanding. But from your account of the rifts and armies, I do conclude that it is weakening. Or rather… the Veil is weakening."

"Was that the Old God's doing as well?"

Morrigan shook her head. "I cannot say."

"But the barrier… if that disappears, what does that mean for the world?"

"I assume more danger. The Inquisitor and the others have left to seal the additional rifts. Whether that will suffice, I cannot say. We will be convening again to discuss this in a few months' time. For the moment, I suggest you set aside these worries… any more burning questions?"

"That's all for now, thanks."

Ria chuckled before descending into a deep silence again. The sun was coming down slowly, coming down to the west.

"What is on your mind?" asked the witch after a while.

"I just… can't believe he sacrificed himself for me."

"Ria… he told me to convey a message to you before… before he passed into the Fade."

At this, the surgeon lifted her head.

"He said that he... loved you," said the witch, the word foreign on her tongue. "And to always see the dawn, not dusk."

Ria snorted, fresh tears coming down. She rubbed her eyes.

"Ah, he said that, did he? That guy… too nice for his own good. I don't deserve that kindness."

The witch's golden eyes softened. "I may have been, at best, an acquaintance of his but… I am certain he meant what he said."

"I don't doubt that," said Ria sadly. "But it still pains me to think of what he gave up."

Morrigan nodded. "'Twas a noble thing, what he did. I must confess I was wrong about him… he was a courageous man."

"He was a true friend," said the surgeon hoarsely.

The two sat in silence for the next few hours, watching the sun go down in the distance and saying their personal goodbyes… to an old friend.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

As the horn sounded, dozens of ships glided out of the harbour. The salty smell of the sea, the cool breeze and the soft whisper of leaves helped dull the ache of loss and guilt in her heart.

But more importantly, past the oak furniture, beyond the rich curtains framing the doors, out on the balcony… was Leliana.

The spymaster's red hair was flaming in the light of the setting sun. Clouds streaked across the sky, on a background of firey strokes of crimson and gold. It was the perfect backdrop for the perfect woman. The most beautiful woman in the world.

She must have said this out loud because her wife turned to her, a softness in her eyes.

Ria shook her head, smiling. "I thought I told you to hold still," she said from behind the canvas.

Leliana let out a noise of frustration. "How long must I stay this way?"

"At least you have those rails to support you," said Ria, rolling her shoulders. "My arms are aching like crazy."

She examined her handiwork with narrowed eyes, dark hair falling to her nose. Ria blew it away impatiently. It reached her shoulders now- she needed a haircut.

"Then shall I… take away that ache for you?" asked the former bard, already moving towards her, hips swaying suggestively.

"Just one moment," said the surgeon, frowning in concentration as she blended the colours together. "Damn, I need more colours," she sighed, shaking her head. "I can't get the sky right."

"Never mind that," said a purring voice in her ear. "You look so… _tempting_ when you're focussed."

Ria shivered.

 _God, how can she still affect me like this?_

She watched hypnotized as her wife took the paintbrush from her hand and laid it on the palette. The spymaster lowered herself onto Ria's lap, hooking smooth arms around her neck. Soft lips pressed against her's. She closed her eyes as if drugged, losing herself in the kiss. The woman's tongue swept in possessively. Ria found her hand travelling down the woman's back to her thighs. Leliana pulled away, giggling.

Her eyes glinted with mirth.

"Naughty," she said, smiling.

Ria grinned. "I can't help it when you're so gorgeous."

The spymaster shook her head. "No moving. You made me stand there like a statue, and now I'm going to have my fun."

Ria's laughed but then her breath hitched when Leliana's hand ran down to her breasts. The surgeon tried to place a hand on her neck but the woman pulled it down. Soon, Leliana was straddling her, pinning her hands behind her back. Their kiss quickened to a wild dance, and Ria growled in frustration at being immobilized. Leliana bit her ear and Ria sucked in her breath.

"Alright, that's it!" she said, grinning. Ria wrenched her arms free and took hold of the woman's neck, leaving a trail of kisses down its length. Leliana laughed.

Ria kissed down to the collarbone, and when she reached below that, the spymaster giggled.

"Hold still," tutted the surgeon. She held the Orlesian's wrists with both hands and they wrestled in the chair, laughing.

But then their eyes widened as the chair fell backward. Ria landed with a grunt, feeling fresh bruises on her back.

"Oh, great. Nice w-" she started, but was cut off by a deep kiss.

The two lay on the floor, bodies entwined. Ria buried her fingers in that silken hair, felt the contours of smooth skin and smiled into each kiss. Finally, they both lay gazing at each other, panting.

Leliana laughed gently, fingers brushing Ria's cheek.

"Oh, I could kiss you all day," she whispered. "Ria… you don't know how happy I am."

At this, Ria's throat closed up. She swallowed the lump down. Slowly, she touched Leliana's cheek.

"I am too," she said quietly.

The spymaster smiled and kissed her gently on the forehead.

"And now we can enjoy this peace together," said the Orlesian.

"Forever," said Ria, smiling.

"Forever," agreed Leliana. Then she sat up, looking down at Ria with shining eyes. "But come, let us watch the sun set before it ends."

Ria took the offered hand and got up. She put an arm around her wife's shoulders and Leliana held it as they walked to the balcony. The sun was nearly down now, with only the tip of the circle visible above the horizon. It burned like molten gold, tangential rays scattered across the ocean.

And she remembered Alistair's words from years ago…

 _Kallian poked at the fire with a stick, slightly disgruntled._

 _Alistair came down to sit with her, smirking._

" _Sorry about that," he said, ruffling her hair and earning a glare from her. "It was hard to resist."_

" _I couldn't watch the sunset because of you."_

" _That's because you wanted to watch it with that bard over there."_

 _Kallian flushed, turning her face away._

 _Alistair regarded her quietly. Then he broke the silence. "Look, I'm sorry I made you do the dishes. But you do realize that you were looking the wrong way…"_

 _The elf blinked. "Wait…"_

" _The sun sets in the west, not the east."_

 _"That wasn't the west?"_

 _"No."_

 _Kallian covered her eyes with a hand. "Oh, great..." she said. Then she gave him a weak grin. "I guess you saved me from embarrassment, then."_

 _Alistair laughed. "I did, didn't I? But… if it makes you feel better, you can watch the sunrise instead."_

 _The elf raised an eyebrow._

 _The other Warden looked up at the stars. "Well… sunrise, sunset_ _. There's not really much difference, is there? It's an illusion."_

 _Kallian's eyes narrowed. "What do you mean?"_

 _"I mean that for both of them, there's a period where the sun is perched on the horizon. Dawn looks pretty much like dusk, don't you think?"_

 _The elf snorted. "Right..."  
_

" _Hey," said Alistair. "We all need a bit of positivity in this world… I don't know about you, but I'd rather think that the dawn was coming than let the sight of dusk get me down."_

 _At this, Kallian turned her dark eyes to the fire in front of her and nodded._

" _There is truth to what you say."_

 _Then the two lapsed into a comfortable silence, gazing at the flickering flames- the only source of light in the surrounding darkness of the night…_

The surgeon looked across the waves rolling in, the way the sun rippled in its reflection and the starlings flapping overhead in the distance.

"Gwaren isn't too bad, is it?" said Ria, smiling.

"It's perfect," said the Orlesian.

At this comment, the surgeon grinned and kissed that flawless cheek. " _You_ are perfect."

The woman chuckled softly, turning to touch Ria's jaw. "And you are my perfect knight."

Together, they gazed at the vast expanse, feeling the refreshing breeze and taking in the clean air. Ria felt the pressure of Leliana's body leaning against her, the soft hands around her wrist, took in the scent of Andraste's Grace.

She breathed in deeply, feeling like her heart would explode with emotion.

"By the way," said Leliana, and the surgeon looked at her wife.

"Mm?"

"Would you like a boy or a girl?"

Ria laughed. "Either," she said, gazing at the woman tenderly. "I don't mind. But if there's anything I want… I want our child to have your eyes."

"And your heart," said the woman, kissing Ria on the lips.

The surgeon smiled.

Leliana smiled back, eyes like the Halcyon sea.

Ria tightened the embrace and closed her eyes, smiling into Leliana's copper hair.

She thought about everything they'd been through together, all the trials, all the good memories… everything that changed.

And, for once in her life, Ria Lewis decided she was the happiest person in the world.

 _ **I'm not ashamed to admit that I cried when I wrote this... again, thanks for going through this journey with Ria. I was actually writing Kallian's story when these ideas just hit me and I had to put it on paper. And lastly, a special thanks to QuietRose-13, PureHeart8, ShatteredSoul 2021, anon is anon, Sparda, Karigan Wolfshead, Lazykid1 and some guests (sorry I don't know your names) for the great reviews and support. Not sure if I mentioned everyone's names here... if not, please forgive me.**_

 _ **Hope the story gave everyone warm and fuzzy feelings inside, as it did for me. Have a very merry Christmas!**_


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